Chuck vs The Butterfly Effect
by n7agentbartowski
Summary: Chuck Bartowski is a normal guy who just hit rock bottom. No girlfriend, no career and no super computer stuck inside his head. It isn't until Chuck meets a gorgeous stranger on the beach that he begins to think his life is about to change for the better. An AU Chuck fic without the Intersect. "Change one thing and it changes everything."
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Welcome to story no. 2! I want to thank everyone who left thoughts and comments on my first. The overwhelming support was what pushed me to continue to write and also to begin a few new projects. For now we have this. It came to my attention that Sarah repeats often in the show how she fell in love with Chuck not for the Intersect, but because he was a 'normal guy'. Well if that's true, then what if the Intersect never existed at all? Or at least what if it had never come Chuck's way? Would he and Sarah still meet? Would they still find a way to connect? That's the alternate universe I intend to explore with this fic. A few familiar faces will appear down the line, but obviously they will be used to different roles than in the canon storyline of the show._

 _What started out as a random one shot has now become a fully realized multi chapter AU adventure, all thanks to beta master michaelfmx. With all that said, I hope you all enjoy the story! Let's begin._

* * *

 **August 1, 2008: Malibu, CA**

Graduating Stanford was supposed to be Chuck's ticket to prosperity. His way out of Nerdom and obscurity. That's what all the brochures had said anyway. That's what his advisors and professors had told him. That's what the dozens of alumni had said when they lectured Chuck's freshman class with ridiculously optimistic smiles plastered on their tired faces. Chuck supposed he should have seen through the masks back then, but he'd been too naïve, too hopeful for a future that was supposed to be laid out before him like a red carpet.

Well the brochures had been wrong and the professors had lied. Getting a job wasn't as easy as pointing to his Stanford diploma with a big shit-eating grin and promising some corporate executive that he had what it took to be a part of their company. The few times he'd tried to appear in front of those leering, suited business men, he'd felt like a child playing dress up. Suddenly his favorite suit didn't fit quite right; the cuffs were worn and the suede patches on the elbows were out of date. His pant legs were a tad too short, revealing the wrinkled socks he wore underneath scuffed shoes. He'd caught a glimpse of his unruly hair in the mirror behind the receptionist's desk and would have bolted for the door had she not called his name right at that moment. The interview was quick. So quick that Chuck barely had a moment to gather himself before he was shooed out the door, all the while being fed the tired lie that they would "be in contact" with him soon. It didn't take long for Chuck to stop trying to pretend he belonged in that world. It seemed that all Stanford had done was offer him a very expensive piece of paper with the words 'Software Engineer' printed above his name in fancy lettering.

Almost five years after leaving Stanford, he was still living with Ellie and working at the Buy More. And as much as it hurt to admit to himself that he'd hit rock bottom, the Buy More was safe. He didn't have to strive for success and cringe in fear of failure. He could slide by with mediocrity…Even be rewarded for it. Every day he told himself he'd start the search for something new and every day he wandered the Buy More aisles aimlessly, scanning merchandise and organizing displays while his life ticked away. It was macabre, Chuck knew, but it was hard to feel any differently. Even his promotion to head Nerd Herder had come at a price. For $11.00 an hour, Chuck was given all the benefits of a Shift Supervisor and simultaneously ostracized by his friends. Jeff and Lester had been the first to turn against him, Anna followed suit, although Chuck suspected it was only because she had nothing better to do than involve herself in store drama. Even Morgan, his best friend since childhood, acted a little aloof towards him these days. Especially after he and Anna spent last week's poker night together in the home theater room, while Chuck was left to the mercy of Jeff and Lester. No friends, no esteem, no girlfriend…

 _Nope. Stop right there, Chuck._ He hadn't thought about Jill since….well, last week. But that was saying something. Jill had been Chuck's whole world for two long years. There wasn't a thing he hadn't loved about his Stanford girlfriend. She was beautiful, intelligent, funny and not to mention a huge nerd. They'd met during a freshman club fair; more specifically at the 'Tabletop Roleplaying Club' and while Chuck struggled to find the courage to ask her out, they built up a friendly connection playing Everquest with the other club members every Saturday night. And then, out of the blue, she'd broken his heart. Remembering the day he'd walked in on her and Thomas Sunderson, captain of the football team and popular frat boy, was a constant nightmare. A reminder that he wasn't good enough. Not even for the girl who promised she loved him.

It was then that Chuck decided he was thinking far too much. Although considering he was, right at this moment, buried up to his chin in sand on a beautiful Malibu beach, there wasn't much else he could do but think. Craning his neck as far as he could, he was able to catch a glance of the Buy More guys prancing around the beach without him. Buy More Beach day was in full swing, but he'd been tricked into sand prison and then left …to die apparently as no one had expressed any interest in him for the past two hours.

It was late in the afternoon, but the sun was still bright and, without an umbrella to protect him from the rays, Chuck's nose and cheeks were beginning to itch and burn. Chuck realized he should suspected foul play when Jeff and Lester asked him to help measure the hole they'd spent nearly three hours digging near the shore. He'd been stupid to climb in, but by going along with their odd request, Chuck thought it might be a start to patching up their relationship. But they'd packed the sand around him and then dashed across the beach cackling like hyenas before he even had a chance to fight back. Chuck had tried to laugh it off at first, assuming they'd come back and free him after taking some embarrassing snap shots, but now he was certain they intended to leave him here unless he could escape by himself….Which he'd tried to do multiple times. But sand was surprisingly heavy and Chuck was, not unsurprisingly, weak.

 _Maybe I should hit the gym with Awesome soon_ , he thought, shifting his shoulders in an attempt to move the packed sand. Glancing around again, Chuck searched the beach for Morgan, only to find him more than occupied with Anna on a faraway beach towel. Chuck sighed and turned back to face the ocean, watching the crimson waves crash upon the shore. In the distance he could see a figure, silhouetted black against the evening sky. The figure was on a surfboard, as far as Chuck could tell, gliding over the waves with uncanny grace and skill. The thousands of thoughts spinning in Chuck's head went silent as he watched the figure cut through the ocean. It was hypnotic. Chuck found himself wondering how it felt to be out there with so much power over a force of nature. Becoming one with it. His thoughts were interrupted when he finally realized the mysterious surfer had returned to the shore and now strode toward him, ignorant of his presence.

 _Great_ , Chuck thought as the figure came closer. The last thing he needed today was a foot to the face.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah Walker hadn't been to this beach in years. The last time she'd visited it was with her father, only days before he'd been arrested by the ATF. Part of her was happy to be in the only place she'd ever really felt connected with her father. The other part struggled to keep bitter memories of his manipulation at bay. Everywhere else, she'd been nothing more than a tool for his con games. But here, he bought her ice cream, he called her sweetheart, he rented her a longboard and helped her paddle out past the large waves, cheering when she surfed back in on her own clinging to the board like a life line. She'd never forgotten the day they spent on this beach because it was the day she had felt like Jack Burton was her father and not just another criminal.

Of course, being able to surf again certainly helped to lift her spirits. Being an agent in the CIA didn't allow her much free time, but whenever a mission took her somewhere near a beach she did her best to get out onto the waves. Being able to feel the salt spray against her skin and the wind whipping through her hair was incredibly therapeutic, especially after the stress of her most recent mission. The CATs had officially disbanded and it was all because of Zondra. It had been nearly a week since Director Graham split the girls up, but even thinking the woman's name set Sarah's teeth on edge. She'd trusted Zondra Rizzo as a comrade and a friend, and how was she rewarded? With a transmitter in the heel of Zondra's boot. Fingers were pointed, accusations thrown, names and insults flung…the childishness of it all made Sarah's head ache. Now, she was forced to twiddle her thumbs and await further instruction. Zondra was undergoing heavy questioning, a fact that Sarah took no small sense of satisfaction from. Amy was being put to use somewhere in Madrid and Carina…well who knew where Carina was off too. She rarely listened to orders and even if she was given a new mission soon, Sarah knew she'd be spending as much time as she could on this rare 'vacation'. Sarah, on the other hand, could hardly wait to be reassigned. She didn't do well with time alone. Time without a goal or a purpose. It felt wrong, like she was wasting her life away.

 _Not exactly appropriate thoughts for a beach day,_ she decided as she rode the last wave onto shore. Wringing the excess water from her ponytail, Sarah tucked her board underneath her arm and strode up the beach searching for a suitably sandy-and preferably secluded-spot to rest. She didn't want to be bothered today, least of all by brainless beach dudes looking to score.

She plopped down a good ten yards away from the shore, setting her board down and drawing her knees up, hugging them against her chest. The wind was picking up now, carrying a slight chill, but not enough to penetrate Sarah's wetsuit. She watched the sun sinking below the waves, making them glow orange and red and setting the clouds above on fire.

"It's really pretty this time of day."

Sarah Walker was not easily frightened. She'd been shot at, stabbed, threatened and even tortured. She was an agent for the CIA, a trained assassin. She knew how to hide fear and keep her calm in almost any situation. But no training could have prepared her for the talking head at her side looking up at her with a wistful grin. Sarah shrieked. She tried to scramble away, but lost her footing on the slick sand and landed with a thud that knocked the wind out of her

"Wait!" the talking head shouted. "Oh my god I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."

Struggling to right herself and catch her breath, Sarah whirled around to face the bodiless anomaly, taken aback when she finally realized what she was seeing. The head, or man as it were, was staring at her with wide brown eyes, his goofy grin replaced by a worried frown.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sarah asked when she'd finally regained her composure. "Is this your idea of a joke?"

"No, no, no!" the man interrupted her before she could continue, his impossibly large eyes widening even more. "I'm so sorry. My friends…er…those guys," He jerked his chin to gesture behind Sarah. "They kind of…buried me here for fun? It was just a prank. Sort of. Honestly, I'm pretty sure they just forgot about me."

"A prank?" Sarah frowned, looking over her shoulder at the group of scrawny, nerdy looking men gathered farther down the beach. "Your friends buried and left you…for fun."

"Well, we're not really friends, per say," the man continued. "Just acquaintances. Coworkers. I kind of figured it would be like a bonding exercise. But it turned out to be a bit more malicious, I suppose."

"Wait," Sarah held up her hands, still trying to figure out if this was all real or if she'd knocked her head on her surfboard and was currently having some strange unconscious dream. "You got into this hole _willingly_?"

The man's face was already red from the sun but Sarah swore she could see a blush rising up underneath. "Uh…Yes. Yes I did."

Sarah blinked. " _Why_?"

He looked away from her and pursed his lips. It looked to Sarah as if he were debating whether or not to tell her the truth. "Those two guys over there," he said finally, jerking his chin again towards a small Indian man and his larger, balding companion. "They're a little bit crazy. They started digging this hole hours ago and when I came over to see what they were up to they asked me to help them measure how deep it was….By climbing in it."

Chuck paused, gauging Sarah's reaction. She didn't bother to hide the smile growing on her face. "And then?"

"And then I got in the hole. Jeff, the big guy, seemed really excited that they'd managed to dig one nearly six feet deep. I decided not to point out that if it was six feet deep, the sand would have to be past my eyebrows." Chuck heaved a weary sigh. "Before I could climb back out, Jeff pinned my shoulders and Lester, the little guy, filled and packed the hole…with me in it."

Sarah couldn't hold in her amusement any longer. She burst out laughing. It was one thing to have found a helpless stranger buried neck deep on the beach, but quite another to realize that he'd hopped into the hole willingly. It was only when Sarah caught Chuck's slightly wounded expression that she managed to calm herself.

"I'm sorry," she said still chuckling lightly. "I'm not laughing at you. It's just…I'm not sure I've ever heard anything so ridiculous."

"It's not the most ridiculous thing that's happened to me, believe it or not," Chuck said, finally returning her smile. "Okay, let me start over. My name's Chuck. I would shake your hand but-"

Chuck trailed off, looking down at his buried body and then pursing his lips at her. His expression was so comical that Sarah couldn't help but laugh again.

"Call me Sarah. Do you want me to help dig you out?"

"That would be fantastic. I haven't been able to feel my toes for about an hour," Chuck admitted with a sheepish grin. Sarah shook her head and scoffed. Did this kind of stuff actually happen to normal people? Was it common to find a ridiculously adorable man on the beach buried neck deep in sand?

 _Adorable_? Sarah paused to consider her choice of words. Adorable, or any sappy sort of adjective, wasn't commonly found in her vocabulary. She began pawing at the sand around Chuck's shoulders, focusing on loosening the tightly packed sand.

"I saw you surfing out there. You were amazing." Sarah smirked at the awe in Chuck's voice.

"You were watching me?" She asked, watching Chuck's eyes widen again as he realized what he'd said. Okay, so adorable had definitely been the right word.

"No! I mean, yes, I was. I was watching but not staring…Or I was staring a little, but not at you. Just in your general direction. I was just looking out at the waves and then you were there and then I watched you whenever you crossed my line of vision and-Okay. That was mean." Chuck had caught the grin breaking out on Sarah's face.

"Are you always this articulate?" she teased, pulling a large clump of sand away and accidentally flicking a large clump of it onto Chuck's cheek.

"If by articulate you mean socially stunted and awkward as hell, then yes." He finished with a cheesy grin that faded the second Sarah set her fingertips against his cheek to brush away the sand. "Um….Are _you_ always this nice to passing strangers you find buried in the sand?"

"Don't know," Sarah shrugged. "You're my first."

Silence filled the air around them and Sarah watched Chuck from the corner of her eye. He seemed to be trying to look anywhere but at her, although it was proving to be exceedingly difficult considering how close she had to get to continue digging him out.

"So you work with those jerks?" she asked finally gesturing with her thumb towards Jeff and Lester and the rest of the Nerd Herders.

"They're not jerks. They're just a little miffed that they were passed up for the promotion to Head Nerd Herder," Chuck sighed wearily and his face took on a tired expression. "Not exactly the dream job I had in mind, but it's something."

The sudden sadness in his eyes startled her. She hadn't expected such a drastic shift in emotion from such a simple questions.

"So what is the dream job?"

"…I'm not sure I know anymore, to be honest," Chuck said and Sarah was relieved to see his smile returning. "Something that puts the dumb degree I worked my ass off for to good use."

 _A college guy_ , Sarah mused. It wasn't something she'd experienced herself. High school had given Sarah her fill of essays, social drama and pointless testing. After she was recruited by the CIA they'd given her all the education she needed, without having to suffer through frat parties or dorm life. Vaguely she realized that Chuck was still talking about college. She caught the tail end of his sentence as she came back to reality; something about software engineering.

"Impressive degree," she said. Chuck shrugged, as well as he could now that the tops of his shoulders were uncovered.

"How about you?" he asked. "Do you work around here?"

"I, uh," Sarah paused. It wasn't like her to hesitate but Chuck's friendliness had almost drawn a real answer. _Oh, I'm a CIA agent, no big deal. 9 to 5. Puts bread on the table!_ "I do some work for the Government."

"Wow," Chuck seemed genuinely impressed. "That's cool. I always imagined government people as really old, grumpy bearded men. Not kickass ladies who go surfing in Malibu."

Sarah laughed, "Well, I'm on vacation."

A strange expression came over Chuck's face as she spoke.

"What?"

"Nothing. It's nothing," he said quickly, averting his gaze. Sarah could see the corners of his mouth quirk into a smile.

"What did I say? What's so funny?" she asked, now genuinely too curious-and a little too self-conscious-to let it go.

"It's just….Well, now I'm just imagining old bearded government dudes on vacation, riding the waves in wetsuits." Chuck's explanation left Sarah speechless. It took her a moment to mull over what he had said before she burst out laughing.

"Is that seriously what crossed your mind?" Chuck nodded embarrassedly, drawing another bout of giggles from Sarah. "Wow. I can't decide if you're hilarious or just plain weird."

"Why not both?" Chuck suggested, beginning to squirm back and forth to further loosen his shoulders and upper arms. "I like to think I'm a pretty unique guy."

"Definitely," Sarah agreed without the slightest hint of cynicism in her voice. "I think it's safe to say that I've never met anyone quite like you, Chuck."

"I'll take that as a compliment," he grunted, finally freeing his left arm from underneath the sand and wriggling the rest of his body loose as well.

"Good," Sarah replied, although she was pretty sure that Chuck was too busy unearthing his lower half to hear her. In another moment he'd wriggled out of the hole, his hips and legs caked with wet sand.

"Gross," he moaned looking down at the mess. "I hate sand. And before you say anything, yes I know I'm on a beach, but I was trying to fit in okay. I will make sacrifices for the approval of my peers."

Chuck's tone made it obvious that he'd intended to make a joke, but his words hit a little too close to home for Sarah's liking. Her entire career as an agent had been spent telling lies and pretending to be someone she was not. She knew just how awful it could be to sacrifice her identity for success. Chuck wasn't even close to dealing with the sort of duplicity she'd experienced, but Sarah was sure he could relate at a very base level.

She watched him totter towards the ocean to wash his legs free of the grime. It struck her then just how very tall he was. She hadn't been able to tell when he was buried up to his neck in sand that he was taller than her. His body was lean and long, not necessary muscled, but still seemingly fit. Sarah quickly realized she was staring and she tore her eyes away before Chuck had a chance to notice.

Chuck waded out into the waves and took an enormous breath before diving headfirst into the water. He surged upward a moment later, shaking his head vigorously, and throwing dozens of water droplets from the ends of his flattened curls. He rejoined her on the beach, shivering so violently that his teeth chattered when he tried to grin at her.

"T-t-t-hanks f-f-for the help, S-s-sarah."

"Don't worry about it," she said, standing quickly and pulling him towards the parking lot above the beach where she'd parked her Porsche. "Come with me, I have a few spare towels."

Chuck stiffened when she grabbed his hand, struggling to make some sort of excuse as to why he couldn't go with her, but failing when his teeth began chattering too hard to continue speaking. Sarah led him up the beach, paying no mind to the few concerned looks thrown their way by passing strangers. Once they reached the Porsche, Sarah popped open the trunk and withdrew a large pink towel, standing on her tip toes to drape it around Chuck's broad shoulders.

"Thanks," he said in a quiet voice, pulling the ends of the towel around himself tightly.

"Pink is your color," Sarah teased trying to put him at ease as she reached to grab a towel for herself.

"That's what they tell me," he replied with a crooked grin. "Did you know that pink actually used to be a masculine color and blue was used for baby girls?"

"Whatever makes you feel better about wearing a giant pink towel, Chuck," she grinned, throwing him a look over her shoulder.

Chuck rolled his eyes and looked back out at the beach, his playful expression fading when he noticed a large white van pulling out of the parking lot and speeding down the highway. "I guess they really were planning on leaving me…."

Sarah moved to stand beside him, watching the white van disappear down the road. She didn't want to look at Chuck, or see the way his bright brown eyes must have dulled as he watched his friends abandon him. It wasn't that she pitied him. Rather, she knew the feeling of abandonment and of loneliness all too well. Out of all the many people she'd met in her years a spy, Chuck seemed the most genuine. His honesty and kindness was almost unreal. It felt even more exaggerated to Sarah, who'd spent years dealing with liars and traitors. Sarah hardly knew this man standing next to her, but she felt strongly that he didn't deserve this sort of treatment.

"Come on," she said, tugging lightly on his wrist to draw his attention. "I'll give you a ride home."

Chuck's head snapped around so fast that Sarah thought he might have injured it. "What? No, you don't have to do that. I live in Burbank, it's a long drive. I'll just call a cab or-"

"Chuck," Sarah interrupted him with the most angelic smile she could muster. He met her gaze and she could see his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed nervously. "Shut up and get in the car."

He didn't look any less nervous, but he did offer her a tiny smile. Once Sarah made sure Chuck was settled, she peeled off her wetsuit, replacing it with the thin pullover sweater she'd brought. Throwing the suit in the trunk, she dashed back to the beach to retrieve her surfboard and stowed it atop the board rack on the roof of the car. Finally, she joined Chuck, sliding into the driver's seat but not before catching the sidelong glance he gave her. He straightened when she looked over at him, eyes snapping forward, his lips forming a thin line.

It took a while for Chuck to regain his composure and after nearly ten minutes of silence he finally said, "Thank you again. For the ride. And for digging me out of the sand."

Sarah smiled. "You're welcome. Thank you for giving me some interesting stories to tell when I get back to work."

"Do you live around here?" Chuck asked, turning his attention away from the lights of the highway. "I don't want you driving all over the state of California just to take my sorry butt home."

"No, I don't live around here. But, really Chuck, it's not an issue."

"Ah," Chuck paused for a moment. "Well then you'll have to come back to Burbank sometime and I can show you around. We've got great coffee shops, strip malls, Large Marts…."

Sarah snorted, "A Large Mart tour?"

"It's more interesting than it sounds, especially with me as your tour guide." He gave her a large grin. "So if you don't live in Burbank then where do you live?"

"Right now? Nowhere. I'm staying in hotels mostly."

"For vacation?"

"For everything."

Chuck's thick brows were drawn low now. "You don't have a home?"

"No. I move around too much to put down roots. It's not a big deal. My employers always manage to find me accommodations," Sarah replied with a shrug.

"But you don't have an actual home? A place that's all yours?" Sarah wasn't sure why it was such a difficult concept for Chuck to grasp; he seemed truly shocked that she didn't have a permanent residence.

"No, I don't."

Finally seeming to sense that he wasn't getting anywhere with this particular topic, Chuck decided to switch tactics. "Then it's settled. You'll have to come back to Burbank when you have the time and I'll introduce you to the Awesome's. There's no one I know who appreciates the idea of a cozy home more than my sister and her fiancé."

"Are their last names really Awesome?" Sarah asked, taking her eyes off the road to glance at Chuck.

He laughed. "No, but my brother-in-law to be is quite literally the most awesome dude you'll ever meet. Captain Awesome is his nickname. My sister will soon be Mrs. Awesome."

"Captain Awesome…."Sarah mused quietly, trying to imagine what a man with that nickname must be like. "Would you really take some stranger you met on the beach home to meet your family?"

"You're not a stranger," Chuck argued, sounding genuinely appalled that she'd even suggest such a thing. "You practically saved my life today. What if I'd been stuck there until the tide came in? I could have drowned."

"I doubt you would have gone unnoticed that long," Sarah said. "I just happened to be in the right place at the right time."

"Turning down 'Everyday Hero' status…How humble of you." Chuck pursed his lips. "Although, you do make a good point. I guess technically we're still strangers. I mean I don't even know your last name."

"Walker," Sarah said quickly, almost biting her lip afterwards. Every answer sprung forward so easily around this man. It was a little unnerving.

"Walker." A slow grin was growing on Chuck's face. "I'll be honest, I was almost expecting you to say Connor."

"Huh?"

"Sarah Connor."

Sarah just shrugged, unsure of what Chuck was getting at. She looked over in time to see his mouth drop open as he gaped at her.

"You've never heard of Sarah Connor? From Terminator? She's, like, the original badass sci fi lady! Oh come on! Sarah, you've never seen Terminator?"

"I don't have a lot of free time to waste on movies."

"Waste? Waste time on movies? Oh, Sarah….This literally hurts to hear."

Sarah snorted again. "How many of these Terminator films are there?"

"Films? There are five. But there's also a television show centered around Sarah Connor. Seriously, you should check it out."

Sarah wasn't sure she wanted to watch a movie about a badass warrior woman when it was the kind of action she lived in every day. Perhaps to a normal guy like Chuck, it was an exciting prospect. But the reality of it wore Sarah down.

"So tell me something Chuck," she began, changing the subject. "If you've got such a great degree in software engineering, why are you still working at a Buy More?"

Chuck's entire body seemed to slump the moment she brought up the Buy More. He leaned back against the seat, pulling the pink towel he still wore tightly around his shoulders and toying with the frayed ends.

"It's tougher than I thought it would be to land an actual job in my field," he mumbled. "I've been to a few interviews here and there but I haven't had much luck with the actual 'getting hired' part of the process."

"So you're giving up on it?"

"No," Chuck said quickly, his brow drawn in a contemplative frown. "Not really, just taking a break, I guess."

"Uh huh," Sarah nodded, trying to keep her tone neutral. "And how long have you been taking this break?"

"A while….Five years." Chuck sounded ashamed and Sarah was quick to hide her surprise so as not to damage what pride he still had.

"Don't you think it's about time you get back into the game, Chuck? Five years is a long time to sit around waiting for life to hand you an opportunity."

"I'm not waiting around!" he said, voice rising defensively. "I'm...preparing."

"For what?" Sarah didn't give him a chance to respond before she continued. "You're never going to get where you want to be if you don't fight for it, Chuck. It's not going to be easy. But you worked hard for your degree and you deserve the payoff, don't you think? Who cares if you fail during one interview? Maybe you'll fail the next one too—"

"Are you trying to cheer me up? Because your pep talk skills might need a little work," Chuck interrupted hoping to steer the conversation away from this topic. No such luck.

"-But you have to pick yourself back up each time you fall down," Sarah continued, ignoring his interruption. "You can do it Chuck. You can land your dream job. I don't know much about you, but you seem smart and friendly and more than anything it's obvious you're tired of just getting by. Get yourself back out there as soon as you can. You have what it takes, trust me."

Sarah was almost as surprised by her little speech as Chuck was. It had been ages since she'd been able to speak so openly with someone and there was something about Chuck that she felt drawn to. A kinship of sorts. Encouraging him to chase his dreams inspired her to return to her own work, despite the CATs treachery, there was still so much she could do for the Agency if given the chance. Soft laughter from Chuck drew Sarah's attention. He was smiling at her, but not with the 100-watt grin he'd been giving her all day. This smile was much gentler, almost vulnerable.

"I'm glad I bumped into you today, Sarah." He didn't need to say more than that. This strange chance encounter had done wonders for both of them and part of Sarah wondered if there was some sort of larger force at work here. Not that she was necessarily an advocate of that sort of thing. There was no such thing as fate. Everything that she'd gotten in life, she'd worked for. Sarah Walker carved her own path. And even as she told herself all of this; it struck her how timely it was that she'd come across such a genuine human being after being so unexpectedly betrayed by her very own teammates. "Me too, Chuck. Me too."

 **o-o-o-o**

They arrived in Burbank a short while later and Chuck directed her into a small apartment complex called Echo Park. Sarah pulled into a narrow parking space and shut off the Porsche.

"Come on," she said. "I'll walk you to the door. Wouldn't want you to fall into another sandpit so close to home."

"Oh ha ha," Chuck drawled, smiling as he climbed out of the car, leaving her pink towel in a messy ball on the seat.

Sarah's voice abandoned her as they strolled through the dimly lit apartment complex. There was a chill in the late night air, and it hit Sarah now that all she had on were her swimsuit and the thin pullover. Chuck had it worse, a pair of swim trunks being his only protection from the cold. She could see goosebumps rising on his bare chest and arms. It suddenly struck her as they walked that this was the last time she would ever see this man.

She wasn't sure if it was fate, chance, destiny or whatever the hell people called it, but something about meeting Chuck after everything that had happened recently felt momentous. After tonight, she would return to Washington to receive orders and Chuck would go back to the Buy More. Or with any luck, she thought, continue to pursue his dreams. Either way, it wasn't likely that they'd ever meet again. They led two very different lives. Sarah was used to saying goodbye. She was used to closing herself off and forgetting people she'd met. But something told her she'd remember Chuck for a long time to come. He was different than anyone she'd ever come across before. He was special.

Sarah wanted to find a way to tell him this, but the words just wouldn't come. Her chest felt tight and her hands were beginning to tremble as they approached the door to Chuck's apartment.

"Well," Chuck heaved a huge sigh and Sarah wondered if he'd been thinking the same things she had. A large part of her hoped he was. "This is my place."

He looked down at her and Sarah was once again struck by his height and the way his brown eyes seemed to hold a thousand different emotions at once. She could see it clearly in his expression that Chuck knew this was the end. He was a goof to be sure, but not a fool, and he'd felt the connection as clearly as she had.

"Thank you again, Sarah. For everything really. I think I'll also have to thank Jeff and Lester tomorrow for burying me in the sand. How else would I have met you?"

"Somewhere normal maybe?" she teased. "You mentioned a Large Mart earlier."

"Imagine a life altering meeting in the dairy aisle," Chuck laughed. "Sounds like a bad sitcom."

Silence fell over them again and Sarah knew she had to leave. The longer she stayed, the harder it was going to be. But before she could say her goodbyes, Chuck cleared his throat and said, "Look, I know you have to go but it's freezing out here. And I feel like I owe you something for saving my life today. Do you want to come in for a quick cup of tea? Or coco maybe?"

Sarah was about to say no. She should say no. If anyone else had asked her she would have said no. But Chuck was staring at her so earnestly; she could see him practically holding his breath as he waited for her response. She couldn't say no.

"Alright."

Chuck's eyes widened and then he blinked as if he couldn't believe what she'd just said. Regaining his composure, he dug into the pockets on his swim trunks, scooping out handfuls of damp sand as he searched for what Sarah assumed were his keys. "Okay? Okay, great! I make a mean hot chocolate. We have tea too…Or coffee, if you're an espresso kind of girl. Anything warm really."

Sarah smiled as Chuck continued to ramble. Truthfully, she'd found it a little odd at first, but now it was endearing, especially considering he only seemed to stumble when she did or said something to make him nervous. He managed to open the door without any further fumbling and made his way inside. Sarah followed close behind, nearly running right into him when he stopped short and squeaked, "Ellie? Devon? What you are guys doing home? I thought you were going out tonight."

Stepping around Chuck, Sarah found herself in the entryway of a small, neatly decorated apartment. It was certainly 'homey', as Chuck had put it. The living room was surrounded by various cozy chairs and a large, plush couch. The kitchen was decorated with tile and various knick-knacks, clearly only meant to decoration, and Sarah could still smell the remnants of what must have been a delicious home cooked meal.

"We _were_ out Chuck. I don't know if you've noticed how late it is, I expected you to be home much earlier." Sarah deduced that the woman speaking was Chuck's sister. They had the same soft brown eyes and hair, although Ellie's hung straight and not in wild curls like her brother's. The man curled next to her on the couch reminded Sarah of a magazine model. He could only be the infamous Captain Awesome. Sarah almost laughed when she heard the deep voice with which he spoke, "How was beach day, bro?"

"Never mind the beach day. Who's this?" Ellie's eyes had targeted Sarah. Her expression was friendly, but still, Sarah squirmed under the intensity of her gaze.

"Oh, Ellie this is Sarah. Sarah, this is my sister Ellie and her fiancé Devon." Chuck gestured back and forth between the assembled group as he spoke. Ellie finally rose from the couch and reached out to shake Sarah's hand.

"Hi, good to meet you, Sarah. Make yourself at home!" Sarah searched for any insincerity in Ellie's tone, but there was none to be found. Chuck's family had no reservations about inviting a stranger in with as much familiarity as if she were family. It was disconcerting for Sarah, who was used to dealing with people who always hid an ulterior motive, but her anxieties began to vanish soon after as Ellie sat her down on of the large armchairs and set Chuck to work in the kitchen to steep tea; after he'd donned a t-shirt and shorts that weren't still covered in sand.

"So Sarah?" Ellie asked once she'd settled back on the couch with Devon. "How did you run into Chuck?"

"She literally almost stepped on my head," Chuck piped up from the kitchen, leaning over the countertop and winking amiably at Sarah. She felt her cheeks beginning to burn.

"Stepped on your head?"

While Sarah struggled to understand the unfamiliar feelings bubbling up in her chest, Chuck explained the prank Jeff and Lester had pulled, Sarah's subsequent rescue and the ride she'd given him after the Buy More guys left him behind.

"Looks like we owe you for saving the day, Sarah," Devon said after Chuck had finished his story.

"I'd hardly say digging him out of a hole counts as saving the day," Sarah mused. If only she could share some of the things she'd had to do as an agent.

"Counts in my book," Chuck said, finally joining them in the living room and handing Sarah a hot cup of tea. She smiled her thanks and ducked behind her cup, watching him from the corner of her eye as he plopped down in a nearby chair and stretched out his long legs.

"So do you live around here, Sarah?" Ellie asked over her own cup of tea. Even if Sarah hadn't been trained to read people, it was painfully obvious that Ellie was trying to deduce her feelings for Chuck and if there was a possibility for a second meeting.

"No. I'm on vacation," Sarah said, wincing as Ellie's face fell. "I work mainly out of the D.C. area."

"When do you leave?"

"Tomorrow."

"Well," Ellie smiled after a brief pause, trying to regain her enthusiasm but Sarah could see she sensed a lost cause. "You'll have to visit us again sometime. It's been a long time since Chuck's brought company home."

"Okay, wow, El," Chuck drawled, a blush creeping up his neck. "Are you really doing this to me right now?"

"Oh, come on, that's not what I meant!" Ellie corrected quickly. "I just mean ever since Morgan got together with Anna and the Buy More guys started acting like jerks, you haven't had many people to talk to."

"Making it worse sis…."

"Chuck, I'm just saying-"

"It's alright," Sarah interrupted before the situation could get any worse. "I understand. I recently went through a bit of a rough patch with some close…friends…of mine. It's been nice having someone I could really talk to after I lost touch with them." She flicked her gaze towards Chuck, who smiled gratefully at her. Even Ellie looked pleased that she'd managed to right a potentially disastrous conversation.

"Sounds like you two were both in the right place at the right time today, huh?" Devon beamed, his blue eyes flipping between Chuck and Sarah like a metronome. "Maybe it was fate."

Ellie rolled her eyes and Sarah snorted, but Chuck looked down at his lap and ran his thumbs around the edge of his teacup. Ellie was quick to revive the conversation and, once the final vestiges of awkwardness had cleared, Sarah found herself feeling more relaxed and at home than she could ever recall having felt before. It was strange to feel so connected to a group of people she hardly knew, but they'd taken her in so earnestly, it was impossible not to be charmed. It struck her then just how hard it was going to be to walk out of their lives after tonight; and not just for them, but for her as well. This feeling of belonging was new and comforting….and another thing she'd have to leave behind the moment she left.

Sarah figured she'd long outstayed her welcome when the grandfather clock in the corner of the living room chimed midnight. Rising from her chair, she thanked Ellie and Devon for their hospitality and turned to Chuck. "I should get going. I've still got to pack for tomorrow."

"Right, of course," Chuck climbed to his feet and placed a gentle hand on Sarah's elbow guiding her to the door. "I'll walk you out."

Sarah hadn't expected the simple touch to affect her as much as it did. Her breath caught in her throat when Chuck's fingers brushed over the thin material of her sweater. She felt her heartbeat quicken in her chest and her mind go blank. She was too distracted to catch what Ellie and Devon said when she walked out the door and suddenly she and Chuck were standing once again in the cool night air, underneath the soft lamplight of the courtyard.

There was silence. It was thick and full of unspoken passions that were making Sarah fidget. "Look, I don't know when I'll be back in the L.A. area, but if I am I think I'll take you up on the Large Mart tour. Or coffee."

Chuck's smile was bright enough to light the courtyard without the aid of the lamps. "Sounds great. You know where I live and I….well, I know your name….So I guess the ball is in your court."

And in spite of everything inside Sarah screaming for her to turn on her heel and walk away without another word, Sarah stepped forward and cupped Chuck's face in her hands. Time seemed to slow down as she moved closer to him. Her eyes met his, deep brown, framed by long, soft lashes. Then they traveled down the long bridge of his nose to his welcoming lips; just slightly parted and trembling with each breath he took. Letting her eyes slide shut, Sarah threw caution to the wind and closed the final distance between them, touching her lips to his in a tender kiss. It was brief, barely more than a second, but to Sarah it felt like a lifetime. She could taste honey from the tea still on his lips and the softness of his curls against the tips of her fingers. Before she could lose herself to the moment further, she forced herself to pull away, taking a step back from Chuck, leaving him slightly unbalanced and confused.

"Goodbye, Chuck. Try to keep yourself out of sand traps from now on, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah." Chuck's voice was distant and his eyes looked a little glassy. "I will."

Turning on her heel, Sarah strode away from Chuck, down the sidewalk and out of Echo Park. It wasn't until she was safely back in her Porsche, speeding back down the highway that she let loose the trembling breath she'd been holding. Her throat felt tight and her eyes burned, but she took a few deep calming breaths to steady herself. It had been a long time since someone had drawn these emotions from her. As Chuck had so aptly put it, Sarah had saved him from drowning-or more realistically a very nasty sunburn-today, but more than that she realized that Chuck had given her something far more important today. Faith that there were people in this world worth saving; people with honest hearts and genuine kindness. People unlike herself and her former teammates.

She turned off the highway, heading towards her hotel in Santa Monica. Whatever came next for the both of them, she was glad they'd shared this strange day on the beach in Malibu. _Thank you, Chuck_ , Sarah thought to herself, hoping that somehow he could feel her gratitude. _Good luck._

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck stepped back inside and shut the door, leaning back against it as he tried to understand what had just happened in the courtyard.

"Chuck?" He didn't realize Ellie had been calling his name until the fifth time, when she nearly shouted it. He blinked at her with huge round eyes.

"Yeah?"

"You okay, bro?" Devon asked, his worried voice deeper than usual.

"Yeah. I'm good. I'm great. I'm gonna go to bed."

Devon and Ellie stared after him, but Chuck payed them no mind. He continued down the hall in silence, closing his bedroom door, flopping down onto his bed and rolling onto his back to stare at the ceiling. It was only then that he finally allowed the enormous smile he'd been holding in to spread across his face. _Sarah Walker_ had kissed him. Sexy, mysterious, friendly, beautiful, amazing Sarah Walker had _kissed_ him. _She_ kissed _him._ The logical part of Chuck that knew it wasn't likely he would ever see Sarah again was drowned out by the rest of him, currently whooping for joy. He hadn't felt this happy in five long years. Right now it didn't matter that Morgan would spend his break time with Anna instead of Chuck. It didn't matter that Jeff and Lester would spend the day mocking him for falling into their trap and it didn't matter that he still worked at the Buy More with no future prospects for an actual career. What did matter was that he had met Sarah Walker today and she had kissed him and she'd done something to make him feel alive again. Chuck decided then, he was going to prove to her that he could do what she'd said. Whether or not they met again, he would know that Sarah had not been wrong when she told him he had what it took to achieve his dreams. Tomorrow he would walk straight into the Buy More and hand in his two weeks' notice. No more wasting time. No more wasting his potential. Chuck was finally ready to start again; and it was all thanks to a girl he'd met on the beach.

 **o-o-o-o**

* * *

 _And there we have it. This is not the end friends, expect more updates to this fic soon. As always any thoughts, comments, or critiques are more than welcome and I appreciate anyone who took the time to give this a read._

 _To be continued..._


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Welcome back everyone, it has been quite some time since I last posted, but this story hit quite a few roadblocks that took time to get through. A huge thanks goes out to my beta _ **michaelfmx**_ , who is a constant inspiration. I would also like to extend my sincere appreciation and gratitude to everyone who read and reviewed the last chapter. I realize that this is quite a different story from what I've written before but I enjoy the challenge of it. That being said, a quick reminder that this is an AU fic. Familiar characters, places and event will be used to suit my own preferences. Canonical timelines and events don't concern me much. Hopefully that becomes more clear as the story unfolds. Alright, enough babbling from me, I hope you all enjoy the update!

* * *

 **February 4, 2009: Washington D.C.**

"His name is Theodore Roark," Graham explained, pushing the folder containing the man's profile towards Sarah. "Sixty years old, founder and CEO of Roark Instruments and your new mark."

Sarah flipped through the documents while the CIA Director, Langston Graham, spoke. It was obvious, even at first glance, that Roark was a big fish. If Graham had decided to assign her a new mission, specifically one that included investigating a man like Theodore "Ted" Roark, it was evidence that her reputation within the agency was recovering after the CAT Squad catastrophe; and it was about time that her efforts were noticed. For the six months since her diversion to Malibu, Sarah had thrown herself into each and every mission she'd been assigned. Big or small, tedious or dangerous she'd been eager to prove herself to her superiors and finally, it seemed, her hard work was paying off. Langston Graham had been her direct superior while she worked side by side with the other members of the CAT squad and, after their fallout, Sarah wasn't sure that Graham would be willing to let her continue as a solo agent. Apparently, she'd been wrong.

Graham leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on top of his desk and lacing his fingers together. "Recently, we've discovered some disturbing communications between Roark's company, Roark Instruments, and Fulcrum. Encrypted messages. Suspected monetary transfers."

Sarah looked up from the picture of Roark's face that she'd been studying. "He's been in contact with Fulcrum? Why?"

"That's what I need you to find out," Graham continued, his intense gaze boring into Sarah's. "Roark is a powerful man and his company has a reputation for creating some impressive technology. Whatever his connection with Fulcrum is, it can't be anything good."

Sarah closed Roark's file and centered it on the desk in front of her. She sat up a little straighter than was necessary and lifted her chin before replying, "What are your orders then, sir?"

"You'll be flying out to Burbank, California, tomorrow morning. Your job is to gather as much Intel as possible on Ted Roark and his communications with Fulcrum

The mission sounded simple enough. Sarah was about to respond that she could be ready to leave far sooner than tomorrow morning when Graham spoke again, "But you won't be going alone."

Sarah blanched. For a moment, she wondered if Graham had also briefed one of the other CATs on this mission, but she quickly put that thought out of her head. Graham wasn't a fool. He wouldn't force a mission with agents he knew couldn't work together efficiently. But Sarah had been working small solo missions for the better part of six months now. Part of her was affronted that Graham felt she needed a partner now. She could handle a simple Intel mission on her own, even if infiltration became necessary. It would be easier if she didn't have an unfamiliar partner stepping on her heels.

Finally, Sarah found her voice and asked, "You're assigning me a partner?"

Graham nodded. "He's a very capable field agent and he's proven himself to be quite proficient when it comes to gathering intelligence. His name is Bryce Larkin. Between the two of you, I expect that this mission will go very smoothly."

Sarah knew it wouldn't do any good to try arguing with Graham, but learning that he still felt she needed support on a mission had put a significant damper on her mood. As if on cue, there was a knock on the door to Graham's office. At Graham's approval, the door swung open and in stepped a suave, blue eyed, confident looking young man dressed in a dark black, well-tailored suit. To Sarah, he looked like every other field agent she'd come in contact with during the last few months. Handsome, confident (or cocky, Sarah corrected as she studied the quiet smirk on his face) and cool as ice. Aware that Graham was watching them, Sarah stood and offered Bryce Larkin a cordial handshake. She wasn't going to let Director Graham think she was being petulant about the partner situation. If anything, she was prepared to take charge of this mission herself. Bryce was going to play the role of sidekick and Graham was going to realize that assigning her a partner was a completely unnecessary, and even a slightly insulting, gesture.

"Agent Larkin," Sarah greeted her new partner as he took her hand and smiled softly.

"Bryce," he corrected, his intense blue gaze never leaving hers. "No need for the formalities. We're partners after all, Sarah."

Sarah narrowed her eyes but managed to suppress the grimace she felt forming, replacing it with a tight smile instead. Taking her hand back from Bryce she turned to face Director Graham, who was still watching them both with a curious expression.

"I take it Agent Larkin has already been briefed on the mission," Sarah said, making sure to stress the professional use of his name. "Is there anything else we need to know before we leave?"

Graham must have caught the venom in her tone but he continued in stride. "Nothing more Your orders are clear. Any and all information you gather on Roark is to be sent back to us immediately. If you find substantial evidence concerning his connection with Fulcrum then I expect you to take the actions necessary to shut him down."

"We won't let you down, Director," Bryce said confidently from behind Sarah.

"No we won't." It was probably petty to try and throw in the last word but Sarah was already seething. She'd hardly known her partner for more than a minute and already he was managing to get on her nerves.

Langston Graham nodded, signaling that they were dismissed. "Good luck."

 **o-o-o-o**

"We'll need to establish a cover," Bryce said as they unloaded their bags from the taxi that had just arrived outside of the Maison23 apartment complex Graham had already secured them a private suite. All they needed to do was check in, set up their base and, as Bryce has just mentioned, establish a believable cover.

"Have something in mind?" Sarah asked, ignoring Bryce's offer to carry her bag and instead slinging it over her own shoulder. Bryce waited to reply until he'd paid the cab fare and then gestured for her to follow him into the apartments.

"I think a cover as a couple will do nicely," he said. "We could say that things are getting serious and we've just moved into the apartment together." Sarah couldn't deny the logic of his proposed cover, no matter how repulsive she found the idea of even "fake dating" Bryce Larkin.

"Or," he amended, as he held the door of the building open for her. "We could go the whole nine yards and establish a cover as newlyweds."

Sarah shot him a glare but it was plain to see from Bryce's calculated expression that he wasn't trying to insinuate anything. He was already throwing himself headfirst into this mission and that meant using whatever cover, lie or drastic measures he could think of to ensure its success. At least that's what Sarah hoped he was intending. She was still having trouble reading her new partner.

"Dating will be enough," Sarah said in a clipped tone. Out of the corner of her eye she thought she saw Bryce smirk, but right at that moment the concierge greeted them and Sarah was forced to push the debate aside for now and deal with the check-in process. Once they were alone in the elevator heading to their suite, Bryce asked, "Afraid of a little commitment, Walker?"

Sarah bristled. Bryce's tone was teasing but his words were far too personal for her to find it amusing. What right did he have to mock her anyway? He didn't even know her. She was itching to throw him a scathing reply but managed to hold her tongue. Starting an argument with Bryce wasn't conducive to the mission and if Graham knew that she was letting insignificant comments get under her skin, then it was likely he wouldn't trust her for more important missions in the future. Bryce seemed to lose interest in teasing her when she didn't respond and simply adjusted the bag he carried on his shoulder; a smug smirk the only indication that he knew he'd managed to bother her.

The silence continued until they'd reached their suite and stepped inside. While Bryce began unpacking their gear and setting up the tech they would need to track Roark and his associates on the nearby vanity, Sarah found herself straying to the enormous windows that overlooked the city. Her thoughts began to drift as she watched the midday traffic and dozens of civilians scurrying along the streets below. She was officially back in Burbank. It had been a long six months since her chance encounter with Chuck on the beach in Malibu but she hadn't forgotten it. In fact, she found herself thinking about him more often than was probably healthy for a spy who was supposed to have no personal attachments. No roots. But Chuck had left an impression, to say the least. Being back in the place she'd last seen him felt oddly coincidental. She found herself scanning the horizon for any sign of the Buy More but all of the buildings seemed to blend together

"Sarah." She turned away from the window when Bryce called her and joined him in the center of the suite, where he was busy pulling a change of clothes from his suitcase. "We should get outside while we have daylight and see what we can find on Roark."

As he spoke, Bryce began to undress in front of her, taking off his button down shirt and replacing it with a blue cotton tee but not before giving Sarah a completely unobstructed view of his chiseled torso. She suddenly became very interested in the toe of her boot.

"I suggest we split up," he said and Sarah heard the zip of his dress pants moments before the dark fabric pooled around his ankles. She focused harder on her boot. "We can get a better grip on the situation if we divide and conquer, don't you think?"

A few more moments of rustling fabric and then a second zip and Sarah assumed it was safe to look up again. "I'll see what I can find around Roark's actual compound. I'm sure there will be security in place so I doubt I'll be able to get too far inside, but I can get a good idea about the layout of the area and look for any structural weaknesses, should we need to infiltrate at some point."

"Meanwhile, I'll see what I can find out about Roark's company from his competitors. I'm sure some of the other software companies around here will have something to say about his recent business," Sarah added, reminding herself that if she intended to take charge of this mission, she would need to be more involved in the planning process.

Bryce nodded as he donned an LA Dodgers baseball cap to complete his "civilian" cover outfit. "Make sure to keep your cell phone on. It's got a GPS device inside that we can use to find one another in case anything goes wrong. That being said, try and keep a low profile. The less attention we attract, the better."

Sarah narrowed her eyes. "I don't need you to tell me how to do my job."

"I know nothing about how you operate on missions, _Agent Walker._ " She cringed at the way Bryce stressed the words. "I'm covering my bases here. Things would be easier if you'd just talk to me. We're partners. Arguing won't get us any closer to completing this mission."

Sarah took a deep breath. She was being petty and she knew it. But she had not been expecting Bryce's company on this mission and his attitude wasn't exactly a welcome addition either. He was right though. If they were going to succeed and impress Graham, she needed to put the arguing behind her.

"Sorry," she said tightly. "I'll agree to work on our communication if _you_ agree to stop treating me like your inferior. Sound like a deal?"

Bryce's lips curled into a smile and he chuckled, "Deal. Now let's get started."

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah wandered around downtown Burbank alone for an hour or so, checking her phone every once in a while for anything from Bryce, who'd gone to explore Roark Instruments, but there was nothing new from him. She passed a few small electronic stores but, upon quick inspection, realized that they knew nothing-or perhaps didn't care-about Roark and his business. There were, however, plenty of advertisements she found sponsoring the local Buy More. Deciding that questioning a few of the employees there might be her best bet, Sarah headed further downtown until she reached a large strip mall. The giant yellow and green sign was an eyesore, she thought, but at least it made the store easy to find.

She passed a small hotdog parlor that smelled like old, burnt meat and also a busy Large Mart. Her mind went back to the night she'd spent with Chuck when he'd offered to take her on a tour of said Large Mart the next time she was in Burbank. At the time, they'd both laughed it off for multiple reasons, the biggest one being that they'd both assumed they would likely never meet again. She wondered if she would find Chuck in the Buy More, and the thought almost gave her pause. What would she say to him if she did see him? Would he remember her? Was it strange that she remembered him? Was he even still working at the Buy More? A large portion of their conversation had been about Chuck's desire to leave the store. God, how was it that, even with everything that she had done in the last six months, she could remember her conversation with him as if it was yesterday? Sarah was good at cutting people out of her life. She was good at closing doors. But as she approached the Buy More, she felt herself beginning to tremble with anticipation.

The automatic doors opened and she stepped out of the warm LA sun and into the sterile, air conditioned Buy More. She took quick stock of her surroundings; simultaneously searching for any possible threat and also a particular tall, curly haired nerd. Finding no sign of either, Sarah swept around the perimeter of the store once, pretending to browse, before she noticed the large Nerd Herd sign overhanging a circular desk. Again, there no sign of Chuck, but the two men who had been his antagonists all those months ago at the beach were there arguing with a well-dressed customer. It wasn't ideal, but Sarah had to see if she could gather information from someone and those two were her best bet. She caught part of their conversation as she approached the desk and almost immediately began to eavesdrop.

"The answer is no," said the short Indian man that Sarah vaguely recalled being named Lester. He was leaning back in his desk chair, hands laced behind his head, glaring smugly at the customer standing on the other side of the desk. "Sorry, advertisement space is reserved for Buy More business only."

"Come on, Lester. We both know that's not true," the man said. "And even if it was, this is NextExpo! The Buy More could have its own booth! This is exposure, I'm not trying to con you guys."

"Sorry, Charles," Lester said with a shrug. "We don't deal with traitors."

" _Traitor_? You're calling me a traitor because I found another job?"

"You jumped ship!"

"I did not! Oh for…Can I talk to Big Mike?"

"He's busy."

"Doing what?"

"Doing something. Probably eating."

Sarah was close enough now to lean against the desk and when she did her eyes flickered over the man Lester was harassing and she felt her heart skip a beat….Or five.

"Chuck?" The word came out of her mouth almost involuntarily but he looked so different she just had to make sure. As soon as he looked at her, she knew it was him, but he'd changed quite a bit in the six months since they'd last met. His dark curly hair was shorter, much shorter, and styled just slightly. She was surprised by the twinge of disappointment she felt at seeing that. He wore a pair of dark dress pants that accented his long legs and a crisp, white button-up shirt. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing a rather expensive looking watch on his left wrist. The one thing that hadn't changed were his expressive brown eyes and the enormous, toothy grin that spread across his face when he saw her. That and the fact that he still wore a beat up pair of Chuck Taylors on his large feet.

"Sarah? Oh my god!" He took a step towards her and, for a moment, Sarah thought he was going to hug her but he stopped himself just in time and clapped his hands to his sides. "I can't believe it's you. What are you doing here?"

 _Good question_ , Sarah thought. She was currently trying to remember why herself. He looked so different. So good, if she was being honest with herself. And Lester had said something about him being a traitor? If he'd left the Buy More, it made complete sense as to why he seemed to have grown so much.

"I'm…here on business," Sarah said quickly when she realized Chuck was still waiting for a response. It was a sloppy cover but he didn't seem to notice, or care. His smile just continued to grow. "What are _you_ doing here? You look great. I mean different. Than you did when we-At the beach." _Damn it._ Sarah was stumbling. She never stumbled.

Chuck's laugh was loud and clear. She'd forgotten just how heartwarming it was to hear him laugh like that.

"Yeah, getting out of the Buy More uniform does wonders for the soul," he teased, gesturing to his fancy clothes. In the back of her mind, Sarah realized that both Jeff and Lester were still watching the exchange like hungry wolves, but it was hard to care what they thought at the moment.

"I can't believe it's really you," Chuck said again, this time almost as a whisper, and when Sarah looked up to meet his eyes she felt her heart begin to hammer against her ribs. "I didn't think I'd see you again. I mean after everything that happened, I hoped I would, but I never…."

 _He still rambles when he's nervous,_ Sarah noted. She was glad that hadn't changed.

"Uh, anyway! I'm actually working for a great software development company now," Chuck continued, holding up the stack of cards he'd been trying to convince Lester to put on display. "Roark Instruments."

Sarah's blood ran cold and she had to work very hard to school her features. Chuck was working for Ted Roark. There was no way he was a part of any of the shady business Roark had going on, at least not intentionally. Right? Sarah was certain Chuck wouldn't knowingly take part in something like that. But that didn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Chuck had connections to Roark, and Sarah had a connection to Chuck. He had just become her asset; one she was going to have to use and burn. Unless she kept his identity hidden from both Bryce and the CIA itself, but that would mean compromising her mission and the safety of the free world. If Roark was as dangerous as Graham suggested, then Sarah couldn't let her feelings get in the way of doing whatever it took to shut Roark down. At least, that was what Sarah knew she'd be expected to do and in any other situation, she wouldn't hesitate to follow through. But now, conflict roiled inside of her, twisting her gut and making it difficult to concentrate on the moment at hand.

"Sarah?" She hadn't realize she'd been staring silently until Chuck patted her arm gently. "You okay? You disappeared there, for a minute."

 _Play the cover, Sarah. You can do this._

"Sorry," she said trying to recover quickly. "I don't think I've ever heard of Roark Instruments. What sort of work are you doing there?"

Chuck opened his mouth to respond and Sarah briefly wondered if this would be all she needed from him. If he gave her an answer with enough information she wouldn't have to continue to lie to him. Just a few words to clue her in and she could save him from falling into something dangerous. But before he would say anything, Lester interrupted, "The devil's work, that's what he's doing."

Sarah clenched her fists to avoid decking the smug nerd squarely in the face. His timing was impeccably exasperating. Chuck rolled his eyes and turned away from Sarah. He leaned across the Nerd Herd desk and met Lester's pointed glare with a smile.

"You know Lester, Roark is still looking to hire. I could put in a good word for you and Jeff."

Sarah saw something akin to hunger flash in Lester's dark eyes. The look disappeared as quickly as it came and he leaned forward in his chair until he was almost nose to nose with Chuck. "I will never betray the Buy More."

"Really?" Chuck raised a skeptical brow. "Why is that? What has the Buy More really done for you all these years Lester? Have they recognized your technical talent on installs? Or rewarded your glowing customer service? If you ask me, both you and Jeff have gone unappreciated here for far too long."

Jeff, who had been little more than a wide-eyed spectator during the entire conversation, suddenly leaned forward and whispered something in Lester's ear. Lester nodded slowly as his partner spoke, tapping one finger against his chin as if he were deep in thought. After a moment, he held up one hand to silence Jeff and leaned against the Nerd Herd desk again, lacing his fingers together before speaking. "Here's the deal, Charles. I will let you leave some of those cards on the Nerd Herd desk and you," he paused, jabbing a finger against Chuck's chest to emphasize his point, "Make sure Roark hears about Jefferson and I _and_ guarantee us VIP access to the Expo. Do we have a deal?"

"We do," Chuck said, setting the stack of cards down. Lester pursed his lips and took the cards, stacking them carefully in a small display stand, spinning them around to face the entrance of the store.

"Pleasure doing business with you, Charles," Lester said. "We'll see you at the convention."

Chuck kept his carefully crafted, business-like expression even as her turned away and met Sarah's gaze. He jerked his chin, gesturing for her to follow him to a nearby aisle and only when they were safely out of the view of the Nerd Herd desk did Chuck lose the mask. He waggled his eyebrows at her and stuffed his hands into his pockets. "Pretty slick, huh?"

Sarah had to admit that watching Chuck deal with his former antagonists with such poise and confidence was impressive and further proof that he had changed. He was no longer the meek, under achieving boy she'd met on the beach. And it was sexy as hell. _Where the hell did that come from?_ Sarah admonished herself. She recovered quickly, thankful that Chuck hadn't seemed to notice her hesitation.

"I'd be more impressed if those two weren't dumb as rocks," Sarah teased, earning a sincere laugh from Chuck.

"Good point. Mission accomplished regardless." Chuck's brow suddenly furrowed and he pursed his lips. "Anyway, you asked about Roark Instruments."

"Right." Sarah tried to ignore the heavy feeling settling in her stomach as she was reminded of the mission.

"I'd love to tell you all about it but not here," Chuck said, glancing up at a random passerby who was giving them a strange look. "I don't know what plans you have today but I've got about an hour left of my lunch break before I have to get back. We could go somewhere and grab a bite. Catch up. Only if you want to of course. If you're busy we can-"

"That sounds great," Sarah interrupted before he could continue stumbling over his words. "Do you have a particular place in mind?"

Chuck's eyes lit up as he realized that she'd accepted his lunch date without hesitation. "Yeah! There's a place nearby that serves great Sizzling Shrimp. It shouldn't take us long to—"

"Sarah."

 _Damn it._

Sarah wasn't much for fate but it certainly seemed like the entire universe was against her having a conversation with Chuck that lasted more than ten seconds. Both she and Chuck turned to see Bryce Larkin striding into the Buy More, lifting the Dodgers cap off of his head and running his fingers through his hair as he approached. Sarah watched Chuck's face fall when Bryce stopped beside them and threw a possessive arm over her shoulder. She knew she'd agreed to the 'couple cover' only a few hours ago but now was the worst possible moment that Bryce could have walked in. She had no choice but to play along and try to ignore the obvious pain and confusion written all over Chuck's face.

"Finally found you, babe," Bryce said kissing her lightly on the cheek. Sarah tried not to cringe. She hated pet names; _that one_ in particular. "I've been looking all over for you, why didn't you answer your phone?" Sarah knew he hadn't called, she would have heard it. Bryce was acting for his cover. He must have been tracking her through the GPS device in her phone.

"Sorry," Sarah said, surprised by the saccharin sweetness with which she managed to reply. "I was catching up with an old friend. Bryce, this is Chuck. Chuck this is my…boyfriend. Bryce." Chuck was obviously crestfallen but trying hard to hide it. He smiled warmly and offered Bryce his hand.

Bryce looked Chuck up and down, raising an appraising brow before accepting the handshake. "Pleasure to meet you, Chuck."

"The pleasure's all mine," Chuck said tightly, his eyes flitting to Sarah for a brief moment. Bryce caught the exchange and tightened his grip around Sarah's shoulders.

"I didn't interrupt anything did I?" He was playing the role of jealous boyfriend rather well, Sarah noticed. There was just enough of a threat in his tone to make it seem like Chuck was stepping into the middle of a serious relationship.

"No," Sarah said, looking pointedly at Bryce. "Chuck was just about to show me around Burbank and tell me about his new position at Roark Instruments."

Bryce's eyes lit up and Chuck began to squirm under the intensity of his gaze. "Really? Sounds interesting. Why don't we all go somewhere and catch up. I'd like to get to know the guy who was about to take my girlfriend out on the town."

Chuck's ears turned red. "No, no. It wasn't like a date or anything. I didn't even know that Sarah was-That you two-I was just….Uh…"

"Relax, Chuck," Bryce laughed, clapping Chuck's shoulder a bit too hard. "I'm just giving you a hard time." Chuck smiled weakly and Sarah had to grit her teeth to stop herself from snapping.

"I'm starved, what say we all go out and grab something to eat?" Bryce continued, steering Sarah by the shoulder and gesturing for Chuck to follow. "Know any good places, Chuck?"

 **o-o-o-o**

The sizzling shrimp smelled delightful but Chuck's stomach was churning far too much to even consider eating. His eyes kept drifting across the table to Sarah and Bryce. For her part, Sarah seemed reluctant to be openly affectionate in Chuck's presence, which he appreciated. But Bryce was another matter. He was all over her, constant touches, brief kisses, toying with her hand when it lay on top of the table. Chuck knew he didn't have any right to be jealous but he was. Painfully so. This was not how his reunion with Sarah was supposed to go, in _any_ of the dozens of different ways he'd imagined it might. The many times he'd fantasied about it in the past six months, there had been far less awkward conversation involved. "So Chuck," Bryce began through a mouthful of lo mein. "What's it like working for such a huge company? Do you ever talk to Roark himself?"

Chuck pushed a piece of shrimp around his plate with his chopsticks as he spoke. "It's a lot of responsibility. I haven't worked there too long but Roark trusts my division with a lot of important projects."

Bryce nodded and slurped up his mouthful of noodles. He was obviously waiting for more.

"Uh," Chuck glanced quickly at Sarah who was staring hard at her own plate. "That's all there is to it really. Lots of work but I have talked to Roark personally, yes. He's a great man. Incredibly smart. So he expects a lot from us."

"I'll bet," Bryce said, his sharp blue eyes piercing Chuck like a knife.

"I really have Sarah to thank for the job," Chuck said quickly. He was desperate for her to say something, anything, that would save him from Bryce's scrutiny.

"Do you?" Bryce's hand tightened over Sarah's.

"Well, sort of," Chuck amended, finally catching Sarah's gaze. "When we first met, I was in a pretty bad place. She gave me the proverbial swift kick in the rear I needed pull myself together and get on with my life." He smiled at her then, trying to silently express his gratitude and simultaneously remind her of the day they met in Malibu. She responded with a smile of her own, quiet but sincere. She still remembered and that was all Chuck needed to know. Bryce's gaze flicked back and forth between the two of them. It was obvious from his expression that he'd never heard of their first encounter. Not that Chuck had expected him to. Why would Sarah tell her boyfriend about some oddball she had met on the beach?

"So how exactly _did_ you two meet?" Bryce asked, looking at Sarah for an answer. Chuck noticed the muscles in Bryce's jaw clench as if he were irritated.

Without hesitation, Chuck leapt to Sarah's aid and blurted, "She rescued me from some old coworkers of mine that thought it would be funny to leave me in a sand pit while the tide came in."

Bryce's brows knit together as he tried to piece together what Chuck had described. "A sand pit?"

"Yeah." Chuck's skin began to itch with embarrassment but Bryce's attention was no longer focused on Sarah so he plowed ahead. "They buried me in the sand and then abandoned me on the beach. Sarah was kind enough to give me a ride home that night."

Amusement sparkled in Bryce's blue eyes, but the smirk on his face made Chuck bristle. "That's cute. She saved you from some work place bullies, huh?"

Chuck looked down at his plate. Bryce's summation wasn't wrong, but it sounded so cruel coming from him. Apparently Sarah thought so as well because she finally spoke up. "It wasn't like that. Chuck is entirely capable of taking care of himself."

Bryce held up his hands, putting a stop to Sarah's rant before she could get carried away. Chuck thought she still looked livid but she sat back and fell silent again, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Relax. I'm not trying to insult anyone." He leaned against the table and winked at Chuck. "You can take a little friendly ribbing, can't you Chuck?"

Chuck gave him a half-hearted smile and a weak, "Sure" but the rest of lunch was stiff and awkward. Eventually, Chuck realized that his hour was up and quickly excused himself, throwing a fifty dollar bill down on the table and telling them that the meal was on him before dashing for the door. As he left he threw one final glance over his shoulder, hoping to catch Sarah's eye, but she didn't look after him. Chuck heaved a sigh, pushed the restaurant door open and bolted down the street as if he could outrun everything that had just happened.

By the time Chuck realized it would have been smarter to take a cab, he was already late. He bolted through the employee parking lot and swiped his access card at the back door, only to run face first into John Casey's freshly polished security badge.

"Afternoon, Casey," Chuck mumbled, pushing himself away from the larger man's chest and straightening his rumpled shirt.

Casey grunted, "You're late."

"Yes, yes I am. Thank you for noticing," Chuck replied, sidestepping the stoic, hulking security guard and continuing backwards down the hallway. "But everyone gets a first offense, right? If you wouldn't mind keeping this between us, John, I would really appreciate it."

Casey's eyes narrowed and Chuck quickly amended the use of his first name, offering a quick salute before turning the corner and releasing a giant sigh. John Casey was Head of Security at Roark Instruments and one of the most intimidating men Chuck had ever met. He was an army veteran, with the scars and attitude to prove it, and sometimes he took his security gig far too seriously, in Chuck's opinion. But he had good intentions and the few conversations they had shared since Chuck had joined the company were pleasant enough. Although the word "conversation" might be too generous, considering Casey's usual input was little more than an occasional grunt.

Chuck hurried down the hall to the office he shared with two other software engineers, Pete and Jose. They'd worked for Roark longer than he had and hadn't exactly offered him the warmest of welcomes when he first started. They were both older than Chuck, so there wasn't much common ground to stand on besides work, but they had become a bit friendlier in the recent months.

Pete looked up over the rims of his bifocals as Chuck entered the large office and crossed to his desk, still breathing heavily from the dash across town.

"Ten minutes late, Charles," Pete said, returning to his computer screen. "Don't make it a habit, Roark won't be happy. You haven't been here long enough to start racking up tardy slips."

"I know, I'm sorry," Chuck said, hurrying to set his things down and reboot his computer. "I went out for lunch and got a little sidetracked."

"Did you bring us anything?" Jose asked, peeking around from his own computer, his thick brows raised hopefully. Chuck spotted a crumpled chip bag still lying open on Jose's desk.

Chuck smiled and shrugged. "Not today, Jose. Remind me to treat you next time."

Jose sighed and grabbed the chip bag, rolling it into a ball and squinting one eye shut as he aimed for the trashcan near the door. The bag hit the far wall and bounced against the rim of the trash bin before landing squarely inside.

"Score!" Jose shouted, lifting his hands in the air and swiveling in his chair. Chuck laughed but Pete just rolled his eyes.

"Get back to work, you two. Roark wants to see the progress on this software by the weekend. None of us want to stay here after hours, so let's get as much done as we can, alright?"

Chuck and Jose exchanged glances and then turned back to their respective computers. Chuck stared at the screen as his current project appeared on it, but his mind wouldn't stop spinning. It kept drifting back to lunch, then back to the Buy More, then back to the beach in Malibu before starting all over again. As if he wasn't distracted enough, his phone suddenly buzzed in his pant pocket. He pulled it out and read the incoming text, feeling his stomach sink as he realized he'd forgotten something very important.

 _Hey, are we still on for tonight?_

He had a date with Lou.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah managed to keep calm all the way from the restaurant to the apartment suite but once the ugly green door swung shut behind them, she grabbed Bryce's arm, spun him around and shouted, "What the hell was that?"

Bryce looked genuinely startled by Sarah's sudden outburst. So much so, in fact, that it took him a few seconds to respond. "What the hell was what?"

"What you did in the Buy More and what you said to Chuck. There was no need to antagonize him like that!"

"I wasn't antagonizing him," Bryce growled. "I was doing my job and questioning a man inside Roark's personal circle."

"He's not a part of anything Roark is doing," Sarah argued, immediately regretting the words when she saw Bryce's frown deepen.

"You don't know that," he said. "You have no idea what this guy has been up to since you last saw him."

"I know enough. I know that Chuck wouldn't take part in anything criminal."

Bryce took a step closer but Sarah stood her ground even when he came uncomfortably close. "You're attachment to the nerd is intriguing, Agent Walker. But also entirely unprofessional."

Sarah was about to defend herself but Bryce cut her off. "Whether or not you think you _know_ the guy, he is still our best bet at getting close to Roark. He has the answers we need. Are you telling me that you're willing to throw away the success of this mission for a civilian, Walker? Should I tell Director Graham that my partner has already been compromised?"

"No," she hissed. It was far more complicated than that but Bryce wouldn't understand and arguing the point further would be pointless. Bryce's icy blue eyes flickered back and forth over her face, searching for a hint of a lie. Sarah knew he wouldn't find one. She was an expert at keeping a mask when she needed one.

"Good," Bryce said tentatively. "Then we agree. We'll need to use your connection with Chuck to find out what he knows about Roark. Let him believe you want to get close to him and he'll open up."

"Need I remind you of the cover we already established?" Sarah protested. "Chuck isn't the kind of guy-He won't let me get close to him if he believes you and I are in a serious relationship."

"That's not exactly true," Bryce replied, a small smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. "Tell him our relationship has hit a rough patch. Tell him you're unhappy. Chuck seems like the type who'd comfort a beautiful, broken-hearted girl without hesitation. Especially one he's already head over heels for."

Sarah's mouth fell open but she couldn't find the words to protest Bryce's observation. To abuse Chuck's trust was one thing but to actively take part in toying with his heart seemed downright cruel. Part of Sarah knew that she wouldn't hesitate to follow Bryce's suggestion were her mark anyone else. But Chuck was different. The honesty and kindness he'd shown on the beach had moved her. She couldn't do this to him. But Roark's demise was her mission. Anything personal had to be ignored. She couldn't let feelings get in the way of completing the mission. She knew that. She was a spy; she'd always known that. So then why did it suddenly seem so complicated? She realized that Bryce was still waiting for an answer but all she could manage was a hesitant nod.

Bryce returned the gesture and then gathered up a few toiletries from his suitcase that still lay open on the bed, sweeping towards the bathroom without a backwards glance. Sarah stood frozen in place, trying to process what had just happened. She'd managed to lose her partner's trust, reveal her personal connection with Chuck, and ruin any chance she had at keeping him out of this mission all in less than ten minutes. Deciding that she might just go crazy if she stayed cooped up in the same room with her infuriating partner any longer, she grabbed her keys and strode out the door, letting it slam shut behind her.

 **o-o-o-o**

Lou was a nice girl. She was sweet, she was funny, and she was cute. She'd even offered to name a sandwich from her shop after him. She was perfectly pleasant company and she had done nothing to warrant Chuck's divided attention but that was what she got. Chuck's mind wasn't on the first date he'd had in months. It was on Sarah. Or more specifically, on Sarah and Bryce. He'd thought about her almost every day since they met on the beach, and seeing her again in the Buy More had brought them back with an incredible intensity. And then Bryce had walked through the door.

Chuck knew it wasn't fair of him to assume that she'd put her life on hold for a guy she hardly knew. A guy who had been nothing but a pathetic nerd buried in the sand. But the illogical part of him had held onto the hope that he would see her again and that, maybe, they could pick up where they left off. Chuck hadn't forgotten the kiss they shared that night in the courtyard right outside Ellie's door. The kiss he had never expected to receive but that had still managed to turn his whole world upside down. And more than anything, he had come to realize, he didn't want that to be the last kiss he ever shared with Sarah. And that was why Chuck had been so hopeful that she would be willing to give it another try when she walked into the Buy More; and back into his life. It was dumb, he knew. It was improbable. But still, it was crushing to realize that she was now with another man. A man like Bryce. Suave, muscled, confident and charming. Everything Chuck was not, no matter how hard he'd tried to change over the last six months.

"Chuck?" Lou was talking to him. She had been for the last ten minutes, but he hadn't been listening.

"Yes?" he said, coming to a stop when he realized that Lou had paused a few feet behind him. They were strolling along the street in front of a busy strip mall, still carrying the coffees they'd stopped for an hour ago. It was getting late and the sun had just fallen below the horizon, blanketing the street full of window shoppers in hazy twilight. It was a rather romantic setting and Chuck hadn't seen any of it.

"Were you listening to anything I just said?" Lou asked, her brow furrowing.

"Uh," Chuck struggled to find an excuse and when none came, he just smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, Lou. I'm a little distracted tonight."

"Yeah, I noticed." Lou's tone was teasing but Chuck could see genuine hurt in her eyes. "Look, Chuck. Maybe we should call it a night."

"No, we don't have to! I'm sorry, I really am. It's not you Lou, I promise. I've had a lot on my mind with work lately."

"It's alright Chuck, I understand," she said, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "But I'm not sure how much fun the rest of this date is going to be if you keep drifting off. Look, why don't you give me a call when things settle down at work, okay?"

Lou was already backing away, robbing Chuck of the chance to convince her to stay. "At least let me walk you home?"

"Don't worry about it, Chuck. I wouldn't want you to get lost on your way back," she teased. "Call me later. I'll be around." She gave him a wave and looked both ways before dashing across the street and disappearing into the crowd. Chuck sighed. It seemed as if nothing was going right today. Tossing his half-full coffee cup into a nearby garbage bin, he stuffed his hands into his coat pockets and continued down the street alone. A few people walked passed by him, mostly couples, Chuck noted. He kept his gaze straight ahead, trying to ignore their happy smiles and bright peals of laughter.

As he walked, his mind drifted once again to Sarah. Now that Lou had left, there was nothing to keep his thoughts from her. Not that they hadn't been on her all day in the first place. He sighed and ran a hand over his face in frustration. She'd haunted him all these months and now having her back in Burbank was only making it worse. If only Bryce hadn't walked through that damn door. Chuck stopped when he realized that someone was standing directly in front of him. He looked up from his shoes, following the soft brown boots that covered a pair of long, shapely legs and then up past the dark jeans and tan leather jacket he'd seen earlier that day until finally he was face to face with the woman currently dominating his thoughts.

Sarah's eyes were rimmed with red and her cheeks were splotchy and flushed. She'd been crying. It wasn't at all what Chuck had expected to see, and before he could ask her what was wrong, she hid her face in her hands and burst into a fresh bout of tears.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah was frustrated; with Bryce, with the mission, but most of all, with herself. She'd never bumbled an assignment like this before, especially not one that was so important. This was supposed to be her chance to prove herself to her superiors and her first day had gone completely backwards. She knew what she had to do to right the situation but thinking about it only made her angrier. She wished she'd remembered to bring her old punching bag with her but she hadn't expected this mission to warrant its use.

Sarah didn't know where she was or how long she'd been trying to walk off her frustration but the sun was setting now and she could feel the slight chill in the air even through her jacket. She paused to take quick stock of her surroundings and realized that she'd wandered into the middle of an outdoor shopping plaza. There were dozens of shoppers passing around her, all seeming to blend into one another as she scanned the area. Sarah's gaze continued to travel around the open plaza until, suddenly, two shoppers in particular managed to draw her attention. She recognized the taller figure as Chuck; the other was a young woman she'd never seen before, but it was obvious from her body language that she was Chuck's date.

 _Or girlfriend_. Sarah felt her stomach turn at the thought and then quickly admonished herself for such a ridiculous idea. If Chuck had met someone else, he would have brought her up sometime during lunch with her and Bryce. Or even before that, at the Buy More. But instead he kept forcing a tight-lipped smile and glancing at her from the corner of his eye when he thought she wasn't looking. Sarah could read body language easily and Chuck was like an open book anyway. He was jealous of Bryce; a reaction she would not expect him to have if he was already in a relationship.

Sarah stepped into the crowd and began making her way across the street, keeping her eyes trained on Chuck and his date as they walked. Chuck looked distracted. The young woman was chattering away animatedly and Chuck, to his credit, was doing his best to look engaged in their conversation, but Sarah could tell that his mind was far away. Briefly, Sarah wondered if he was still thinking about her. Their second encounter hadn't gone exactly the way she'd wanted it to and she was sure that Chuck must have felt the same way. Finally, the woman stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, watching Chuck continue ahead without her. When Chuck noticed her absence, he turned, stumbling a little over his large feet in the process. They exchanged a few words that Sarah wasn't close enough to hear, but gathered from the young woman's expression that she'd had enough for the night. Sure enough, she gave Chuck a small wave and then hurried back the way they'd come, eventually disappearing into the crowd. Chuck looked defeated; not sad, but tired, as if he held an enormous weight on his shoulders.

He continued to walk along the street on his own and Sarah quickly realized that this was her chance to speak with him alone. For a split second she considered cornering him and telling him everything she could about Roark's treachery, her real relationship with Bryce, and her confusing and overwhelming feelings. For just a moment she imagined how wonderful it would feel to tell him the truth, to let him know that this was not the way she would have had them meet again. But the moment passed and Sarah suddenly remembered the disdain in Bryce's voice and Graham's expectation of her and her own doubts about her competence as a spy, and she knew that the mission had to come first.

Taking a moment to gather herself, Sarah pushed through the crowd towards Chuck, trying to pace herself so that their paths would cross at just the right moment. As she walked, she allowed the whirlwind of emotions she was fighting to control to seep to the surface. All of the day's frustration and anxiety and anger sprung to the front of her mind and soon Sarah found very real tears wetting her cheeks. Just as she was about to run straight into Chuck, she stopped short and looked up at him. He paused as well, his eyes rising from the pavement to meet hers and his mouth dropped open in shock.

"Sarah," he said, obviously startled to see her.

 _Let him believe you want to get close to him and he'll open up,_ Bryce's words echoed in her ears.

She had to be a spy now. She had to do her job. So she burst into tears. Chuck was at her side in an instant, just like Bryce had predicted he would be. Sarah felt his hands rest against her shoulders. His touch was light though, and hesitant, as if he were afraid the contact might be too much.

"Hey. Sarah, what's wrong?" he asked in a gentle voice. "Are you ok? Did something happen?"

"It's Bryce," she replied, adding a small hiccup to the fabricated sobs.

"What happened?" Chuck asked again, but this time Sarah caught a hint of fear in his voice. "What did he do?

"Nothing. He didn't do anything. We just had another fight. The move from D.C. has been so stressful and all we seem to do now is argue. I told him that moving into an apartment together might be too much but he wouldn't listen." Sarah paused to gauge Chuck's response. He was gazing at her intently, a thin wrinkle forming between his brows. "I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe this move was what we needed to realize that we just aren't meant to be together."

"Don't say that, Sarah," Chuck said, squeezing her shoulders lightly. "You're right. Tough situations and stress can bring out the worst in people. But you shouldn't give up on something that's made you happy."

Sarah was speechless. Out of all the things Chuck could have said to comfort her, encouraging her fake relationship with Bryce wasn't exactly what she'd expected to hear from him.

"Bryce cares about you and you care about him, right?" Sarah nodded mutely, afraid that words might give her away. "You guys can work through this. Sometimes the rough patches are what make people stronger."

He tilted his head to catch her gaze and give her a quiet smile. Sarah tried to return the gesture but the guilt weighing heavily in her stomach made it difficult.

"Look, why don't you give Bryce some time to cool off for a bit? Come with me to visit Ellie. She'd love to see you again." After a moment's hesitation, Sarah nodded. The part of her still focused on the mission knew that she could gather more information if she went with him and the other part of her really did want to see Ellie again; to be in that apartment that had made her feel so at home six months ago. Chuck managed to flag down a cab and once they were inside and on their way to Echo Park, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed his sister.

"Hey, El, it's me. Just wanted to give you a heads up, I'm bringing someone over to say hi," Chuck paused as he listened to his sister's reply. "No. No, uh, not Lou…..She had to leave early, said something came up."

Chuck glanced at Sarah out of the corner of his eye, smiling sheepishly before he continued addressing Ellie. "S'ok, El. I'll see her around town sometime, I'm sure. We weren't really clicking anyway."

Chuck assured Ellie that the cab would arrive soon and then hung up the phone, offering Sarah another apologetic smile.

"Who's Lou?" she asked. Even though it was clear he'd been on a date, she was curious to hear what Chuck would say. He didn't know that she'd seen the entire exchange, after all.

"Oh, uh, she's this girl who works at a sandwich shop near work. She's nice. We hung out a little bit tonight." Chuck began twisting the watch around his wrist nervously. "She had some things to do so we called it early."

"You were on a date?"

Chuck's ears turned red and he twisted the watch around again. "Sure, you could call it that. Didn't quite work out though. It's alright. Anyway, Ellie will be excited to see you. She's officially Mrs. Awesome now, by the way."

"How was the wedding?" Sarah asked, watching Chuck's face carefully. His eyes lit up as he began to describe his sister's ceremony and the nervous energy he exuded began to fade.

"It was incredible. They were married on a beach. _The_ beach, actually. The one in Malibu. It was a very simple ceremony but that was perfect for Ellie. She looked amazing and I've never seen Awesome smile that big before."

"It sounds beautiful," Sarah murmured. "I would have liked to see it."

"Oh, don't worry about that," Chuck laughed. "Ellie will be pulling out all of the pictures and videos she has to show you, I promise."

The rest of the cab ride passed quickly with Chuck doing all he could to keep the conversation light and away from the subject of Bryce. He sat just close enough to her that their thighs and shoulders brushed occasionally. But Sarah noticed he never made a move to touch her more than that. Chuck had offered to help and comfort her, like Bryce knew he would, but he remained aware of her relationship and kept a respectful distance. And it made Sarah's heart ache to know that she was abusing Chuck's genuine kindness with every moment that passed.

They reached Echo Park and Chuck led the way into the apartment complex. It hadn't changed a bit since Sarah last saw it, in fact it was also close to the same time of day that she'd been here the first time. Chuck rapped quickly on Ellie's door and it swung open immediately as if she'd been crouched behind it waiting for them. Ellie's wide brown eyes flickered over Chuck and then Sarah, an enormous smile lighting up her face. She practically squealed as she pulled Sarah into the house and also into a suffocating embrace. The hug was over before Sarah could do more than pat her back in return and then she was being held at arms-length as Ellie looked her up and down.

"Oh my god, Sarah! I can't believe it's you." Chuck had said the same thing, Sarah noted. "What are you doing back in Burbank?"

"Work brought me back," Sarah said, feeling a genuine smile creep onto her face as Ellie continued leading her into the apartment.

"Really? That's wonderful! Here, have a seat," Ellie said, pushing Sarah down onto the living room sofa and then returning to the door to grab Chuck and do the same thing to him. "Are you hungry? Or thirsty? I could make us some tea?"

"I'm alright, Ellie," Sarah assured her now frazzled host. "I just stopped by to see how you were doing. Chuck told me you had some pictures from your wedding?"

"Yes!" Ellie clapped her hands excitedly and darted to the bookshelf. Chuck rolled his eyes and gave Sarah a knowing smile. 'Be right back', he mouthed, rising from the couch and creeping towards the front door of the apartment. Sarah watched him leave, and then followed his progress through the window, as he crossed the courtyard and opened the door to a separate apartment. It suddenly occurred to her that he must not be living with his sister anymore. It made sense; it would be difficult playing the third wheel to a married couple. But something told Sarah that wasn't the only reason he'd finally gotten out on his own. Ellie returned to the couch and began flipping through her wedding album, pausing every once in a while to explain the story behind a certain picture. The ceremony really had been beautiful and Ellie was so welcoming that Sarah soon found herself fully engaged in the conversation, her mission long forgotten.

"So, Sarah," Ellie asked after they'd flipped through a few pages of the album. "How long is work going to keep you Burbank? Or do you know?"

"I'm not sure," Sarah replied with the truth for once. She didn't know how long the mission would take to complete at this point. "A while, I hope."

Ellie smiled. "It really is good to see you again. Chuck still talks about you a lot, you know. I always wanted to thank you for being there for him on the beach that day. He owes you a lot."

"He doesn't owe me anything," Sarah said adamantly, but Ellie just shook her head.

"You did something for him that the rest of us couldn't, Sarah. You've seen how different he is now. I don't know exactly what you said to him, but it was just what he needed." Sarah looked down at her lap. "The morning after you left he started printing resumes again. He put in his two weeks at the Buy More, he bought a new suit. And now he's working for a huge software company. All because of you."

Sarah knew that wasn't true. It couldn't be just because of her. She didn't want it to be because of her.

"Chuck had it in him from the start," she said, attempting to deflect Ellie's praise.

"Yes, he did. But you brought out the best in him." Finally Sarah looked up and met Ellie's earnest gaze, feeling her chest constrict painfully. The door opened then and Chuck reentered, his work clothes gone, replaced by a more casual blue polo shirt and pair of jeans. Sarah was reminded of how different he looked from the last time she'd seen him in this apartment. Ellie's praise seemed much more valid now that she saw Chuck standing in the doorway with a poise and confidence he'd been lacking the first time they'd met. The connection they shared on the beach had been strong, Sarah admitted. Even still, it surprised her that she'd made such an impact on Chuck's life when she was little more than a passing stranger. But, then again, had he not done the same to her?

"Did I miss anything?" he teased, gesturing to the photo album that still lay open on Ellie's lap.

"Nothing much." Ellie gave Sarah a knowing wink and shut the album, crossing the room to put it back in its place on the shelf. Chuck plopped down on the couch next to Sarah again. The cushion sunk a little under his weight and Sarah slipped a little closer to his side. If he'd noticed, it didn't show. Ellie joined them as well and soon both the time and the mission slipped from Sarah's mind as the Bartowski family made her feel entirely at home again. Like the six months that they'd been apart had never passed; like if she was more than just a stranger. They talked more about the wedding, Chuck's new apartment and his Call of Duty marathons with his roommate and best friend Morgan. More than once Ellie offered to take Sarah shopping around Burbank and she couldn't find it in herself to decline. When there was finally a lull in the conversation, Sarah checked her phone, realizing that it had been more than a few hours since she stormed out of her and Bryce's suite.

"I should get back," Sarah said as she pocketed her phone and rose from the couch. Ellie looked over at the grandfather clock in the corner of the room, obviously having also lost track of time.

"Sorry we kept you so long, Sarah," she apologized before pulling Sarah into another embrace. "But it was so great catching up."

Sarah agreed, promising Ellie that they would keep their shopping date and then she turned to Chuck who was already waiting for her near the door. Sarah took a deep breath, struggling to ignore the deep sense of nostalgia that came over her, and waved once more to Ellie before striding out the front door. Chuck followed her to the fountain in the middle of the courtyard where they both stopped. Sarah turned to face him and realized that she had no idea what to say to him. The familiarity of the moment was palpable and Sarah could see the longing in his brown eyes but he didn't move any closer. Finally Chuck broke the silence and asked, "Are you going to be okay getting back? I can call you a cab."

"I'll be alright, Chuck," she smiled. "I think I can manage on my own."

He coughed a short laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. "Right. Then can I at least give you my number? That way if something goes wrong or if you need help, with Bryce, or with anything really, you can call me." Sarah didn't hesitate, she simply handed him her phone so that he could dial in his number. Having his number was part of the mission, after all. She had constant contact with him now. Chuck handed her back her phone and stuck his hands back into his pockets, licking his lips nervously. Finally he said, "Look, I don't know if you have plans already but Ellie, Awesome, Morgan and I were going to head down to the beach for a trip this weekend. You're more than welcome to come, if you want. Bryce is too. Um, it might help you two feel more at home in Burbank."

He finished with a shy shrug that brought a smile to Sarah's face. "That sounds fun. I'll have to…check with Bryce first. Can I get back to you?"

"Of course," Chuck replied eagerly. "And it's just an invitation. No pressure. But…it would be great if you came along. Maybe you can teach me to surf this time?"

"That might take more than just a weekend for you," Sarah teased.

"Ouch, low blow," Chuck winced emphatically. "But probably accurate." The two of them shared a quiet laugh and finally Sarah took her cue to leave. If she stayed any longer, she knew there was likely to be a repeat of the first night they'd met and she'd done enough lying to Chuck tonight. She didn't want to make it more complicated than it had to be.

"I'll be in touch soon, then," she said taking a few steps backwards. "Good night, Chuck. And thank you for helping me."

"Of course," he replied, his voice little more than a whisper. He smiled and bid her goodnight, watching her until she left the courtyard and disappeared into the darkness. Only when Chuck was sure that she was gone did he let his smile disappear. He sat on the edge of the fountain, hid his face in his hands and heaved an enormous sigh. In spite of his recent success, his new friends and confidence, Chuck had never felt as low as he did when he watched Sarah walk away, knowing she was going home to find solace in the arms of another man.

 **o-o-o-o**

* * *

Thanks for reading! Until next time...


	3. Chapter 3

_Wowser, welcome back! This chapter was a doozy to get out but thanks to my incredible beta michaelfmx, here we are. I can't say it enough, so I'm going to mention it again, thank you so much to everyone who is reading this, throwing out critiques, and generally supporting the story. It's incredible to hear thoughts and encouragement from each and every one of you and I sincerely hope you enjoy this update. With all that out of the way, let's get started!_

 ** _Edit: Updated for errors._**

* * *

 **February 6, 2009: Burbank, CA**

Chuck's cursor hovered over the search key of his browser. He shot a quick glance over his shoulder, checking to make sure that he was still alone in the office. Pete and Jose left for their lunch break a little over 10 minutes ago, but Chuck had elected to stay behind to get ahead on the project before the weekend deadline. Or, at least that had been his excuse. In reality, Chuck had no intention of working through his lunch break. He stared hard at his computer screen, finger hovering over the mouse as he tried to convince himself that what he was about to do wasn't out of bounds. The words _Bryce Larkin_ stared back at him from inside the search bar. Stark, black and unmoving.

Chuck wasn't entirely sure why he'd felt the need to see if he could find any information on Sarah's new flame. Part of him was simply curious. Bryce had come seemingly out of nowhere and, even though they'd spent an entire lunch break together, Chuck still had no idea what he did for a living, where he was from, or how he and Sarah had met. Another part of him wondered if he was also looking for something that he could use to compare himself to Bryce. But it was really no contest, if he was being honest with himself. At face value, Bryce seemed to have everything. Good looks, apparently a successful career, but most importantly, he had Sarah. And speaking of Sarah, Chuck wondered what she would think of him if she knew he was about to do. She certainly wouldn't be impressed and to be honest, Chuck was a little ashamed in himself already. Were he in Bryce's shoes, he wouldn't appreciate being monitored or spied on by a complete stranger. And that thought put a sour taste in his mouth, so he quickly pushed it aside. This wasn't spying. It was simple curiosity, he convinced himself. He would hit search, hopefully find some sort of social media or professional website, scan through it briefly and put his curiosity to rest. There was nothing weird about it. Right?

Chuck took a breath and flexed his fingers above the mouse. Just as he was about to hit the search key, a gruff voice from behind him said, "Who's Bryce Larkin?"

Chuck nearly fell out of his chair in surprise. He managed to reign in the high pitched shriek that threatened to escape his lips and swiveled around, coming nose to nose with John Casey, Roark's Head of Security. For a man of his size, Chuck was surprised that Casey had managed to sneak up on him at all.

"Casey! You scared the hell out of me!"

Casey's mouth twitched into a smirk and he wheeled Pete's desk chair around next to Chuck's. The chairs old springs creaked under Casey's weight when he leaned back to prop his feet up on the edge of Chuck's desk. Chuck noticed he'd brought a brown paper lunch sack with him. It wasn't uncommon for Casey to wander away from the security desk to join Pete, Jose, and himself during the lunch. But he usually just sat nearby, wordlessly munching his daily Reuben while the other three talked. Very rarely was Chuck ever forced to speak with the man one-on-one. And now was the least appropriate moment that Casey could have walked in. Casey pulled his Rueben sandwich from the lunch bag and took a large bite. He chewed for a few seconds before nodding back at the computer screen that still displayed Bryce's name.

"So who is he? New crush?"

"He—What? I—No. No, he's just a guy I met at the Buy More the other day." Only after the words left Chuck's mouth did he realize how they sounded. Casey noticed too, his brows rose noticeably and Chuck could see another smirk growing on the guard's face. Chuck slapped his palm against his forehead, feeling his ears beginning to burn in embarrassment.

"That's cute, Bartowski. I'm happy for you."

"No, Casey, seriously. He's just some guy. All I know about him is that he's dating this…." Chuck paused, trying to decide how much he should tell Casey. What harm could come from telling him the truth? "This girl I met when I was still working at the Buy More."

"Ah," Casey nodded understandingly and took another bite of his sandwich. "So you're scoping the guy out. Checking out the competition?"

"Yes. Wait, no," Chuck amended quickly, although he couldn't deny the same thoughts had gone through his own head just moments before. Turning around to his computer, he exited the browser before Casey could ask any more questions. "Forget it. It's not important. I would also _really_ appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone I was about to go full cyber stalker mode."

Casey shrugged one shoulder and grunted, which Chuck decided to take as a reluctant agreement. After another moment of silence, Casey suddenly asked, "How'd your date with the sandwich girl go?"

"The sandwich girl? You mean Lou? It was alright. I think we-Wait! How did you know about that?" Chuck had always been under the impression that Casey took his job as Head of Security far too seriously, but if he was also spying on them outside of the job….

"She's been coming by the front desk for two weeks asking to talk with you," Casey mumbled, finishing his sandwich and tossing the plastic baggie it came in into the trash.

"What? And you never came to get me?"

Casey shrugged again. "You were busy. I told her you'd get back to her after work hours."

"You never told me that either!" Chuck huffed. It suddenly made sense as to why Lou had been so quick to abandon him on their date. She'd been under the impression that he wasn't all that interested over the past two weeks. "Thanks, Casey….You're a true wingman."

Casey wasn't fazed by the sarcasm in Chuck's voice, he just sniffed and began rummaging through his lunch sack again. "Didn't think I'd need to help you keep in touch with a girl you were interested in, Bartowski. Unless," Casey peered at Chuck from the corner of his eye, "You weren't really that interested in her to begin with."

Chuck opened his mouth to respond, but Casey had hit the nail on the head. Had he really wanted to pursue Lou, he would have. But she'd been little more than a distraction over the past couple of week. He supposed he should apologize as soon as he found the time to see her again. Casey seemed pleased by Chuck's silence. He pulled out a bag of Doritos, open it and began munching on them, watching Chuck tap his fingers against his desk thoughtfully.

"Casey?" he said finally. "Do you believe in fate?"

Casey snorted. "No. Stupid concept."

"Okay," Chuck said, drawing the word out in a sigh. "What about chance? Coincidence? Anything?"

Casey's eyes narrowed as he studied Chuck's face. "I'm not one to discuss philosophy with, Bartowski. So I'll just ask you now, is there a point to this conversation?"

Chuck blew out a rush of air and leaned back in his chair, running his fingers through his hair as he tried to organize his thoughts. Telling Casey the story, from the very beginning, could be therapeutic. At the same time, Casey wasn't exactly the empathetic type. In fact, Chuck often found himself wondering if the security guard had been hatched rather than born. However, it was possible that Casey's unbiased opinion was what he needed right now. Chuck had not been able to fully confide in Ellie or Morgan because they would never be able to be that impartial when it came to his personal life.

Deciding he needed to confide in someone, Chuck steadied himself with a deep breath before pouring out the entire story to the stoic security guard sitting in front of him. He began with his experience at Stanford and with Jill and then the Buy More and the fruitless interviews. He told Casey about Malibu and Sarah and how everything had seemed so much clearer after they'd met. He relayed his interview with Roark and the personal connection they'd made. He told about how Sarah had walked back into the Buy More six months after they'd first met with Bryce right behind her. The story flowed out of him like rushing water and for his part, Casey seemed to be listening intently, although he offered little in the way of words. Chuck was actually grateful for his silence. When he was finished, the room filled with a heavy silence. Casey leaned back in Pete's chair and raised his eyes to the ceiling, cracking each of his knuckles methodically as he mulled over Chuck's story.

"So," he said finally, lowering his piercing gaze to Chuck's. "You want me to tell you that this woman, Sarah, is your destiny or something?"

"No, that's not….I never thought I'd get the chance to see her again, Casey. But she walked right back into the Buy More like no time had passed at all. It has to mean something, doesn't it?"

Casey shrugged. "If you want it to mean something, then go and make it mean something."

"What?"

"Look, Bartowski," Casey began, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "Fate, destiny, chance, or whatever the hell you want to call it, is for suckers who are too afraid to take control of their lives. A real man makes his own path."

Chuck offered Casey a half smile. In his own rough way, the security guard was trying to be supportive, but Chuck still felt as conflicted as he had at the start of this conversation. Before either of them could say anything more, Chuck's phone buzzed loudly on the desk between them. The number was not one that Chuck recognized, but he didn't need a name to know who it was. The text read:

 _Chuck,_

 _Can we talk?_

 _I'll be at the coffee shop on Riverside Drive in 10 minutes._

 _Sarah_

Chuck looked up from his phone to see Casey scanning the message as well. He met Chuck's gaze and nodded reassuringly, murmuring, "Go make it something, kid."

Chuck glanced at his watch. Riverside was only a few blocks away. If he hurried, he could meet Sarah and make it back in time to work before his lunch break ended. He hoped. Bidding Casey a hasty goodbye, Chuck grabbed his bag and bolted out the door, shoes squeaking on the linoleum floor as he ran.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck was panting hard by the time he reached the coffee shop. He took a moment to compose himself before pushing the front door open and stepping into the cozy café.

Considering it was past noon on a weekday in downtown L.A., the coffee shop was relatively empty, save for a few older couples and some college students hunched over their laptops. After a quick scan, Chuck spotted Sarah camped at a table nearby, gazing out the window, her chin resting in her palm and her eyes far away and unfocused. Chuck started towards her, trying to ignore the way his palms were beginning to sweat and how his breath caught in his throat when she noticed him and smiled.

 _God, she's so beautiful_. Chuck knew he shouldn't be thinking things like that. Sarah had a boyfriend. And not just any boyfriend, but Bryce _freaking_ Larkin and his magazine model good looks. Even still, he couldn't help himself. The afternoon sun poured in through the large window and lit a halo in her golden hair. All rational thought quickly left Chuck's head and by the time he found himself standing beside her, he felt as if he'd forgotten how to speak. The silence didn't last long, thankfully, as Sarah gestured for him to take a seat, sliding a cup of coffee towards him once he did.

"I didn't know how you take it," she said, nodding at the coffee in front of Chuck when he stared at it dumbfounded. "It's black. But they have a condiment station over there if that's not-"

Chuck interrupted before Sarah could continue. He didn't want to abuse her kind gesture by adding to the coffee and besides, a man took his coffee black anyway, right? Bryce probably did. Chuck wasn't sure what Sarah would think of his usual morning drink, which was actually two parts cream and sugar to one part coffee. Although, he guessed she would not be as impressed as she might be disgusted.

"Black is fine!" He said, taking a huge swig to prove it and regretting it instantly. He barely succeeded hiding his grimace as the bitter liquid hit him like a bolt of lightning. "Thank you."

If Sarah noticed him choke, she didn't let on. Instead she took a sip of her own coffee and said, "Thank you for coming on such short notice. I know you're busy with work."

"Don't worry about it." Chuck waved off her apology. "You actually saved me from an awkward lunch with our security guard. So, um, what was it you wanted to talk about?"

"I just wanted to know if your invitation for the beach trip still stands." Sarah looked up at him through her lashes, leaving Chuck momentarily speechless again. He cleared his throat nervously and paused to compose himself before replying. "Yes, of course it still stands! Did you talk to Bryce? Is he interested in going too?"

Sarah's eyes fell to the cup cradled between her palms and she began running her thumbs around the rim while she spoke, "No. Bryce won't be coming."

"Oh."

"We," Sarah paused, her gaze flickering over Chuck's face before settling on a distant point outside the window, "Decided it might be best to take a break. Space and time could be what we need to get back on track."

Chuck felt his stomach sink. He was grateful for the opportunity to spend time with Sarah sans her intimidating boyfriend, but at the same time Chuck had never known a couple that was able to solve their problems by "taking a break" from one another. In his experience, it only served to deepen the rift. It was entirely possible that this was beginning of the end for Sarah and Bryce and if that were true, he wasn't looking forward to seeing Sarah heartbroken. Even if that meant that Bryce Larkin would be out of the picture. Deciding he couldn't let Sarah know how he felt about their decision, Chuck opted for a compassionate response, "Sure. Maybe that's exactly what you guys need. The beach is going to be a lot of fun and Bryce will have a chance to adjust to Burbank. By the time we get back, I'm sure everything will be great between the two of you."

Chuck noticed Sarah's eyes flickering over his face while he spoke, as if she were evaluating his response. By the time he'd finished speaking, she was smiling at him, the lips he couldn't stop staring at curving gently. Looking at her was making his stomach flip flop.

"So!" Chuck said, clearing his throat to break the tension. "Ellie, Awesome and I would still love it if you came. We're taking off tomorrow afternoon from Echo Park. I can get you a cab to meet us there if you need it?"

"That's sweet, Chuck," Sarah said and his stomach flipped again. "But I'll be able to get myself to Echo Park."

"Right, of course. Sorry, I don't mean to imply that you're not capable. I just thought that this being a new city and all, that you might…." Chuck trailed off when he realized Sarah was watching him with an amused expression. "…You were just gonna let me go, huh?"

Sarah's nose crinkled when she smiled and she shrugged a single shoulder. Chuck's stomach was practically doing acrobatics at this point. "It's cute when you ramble like that."

"Cute? Gee, thanks for making me feel like I'm eight," he teased. Sarah just raised her brows innocently and hid another smile behind her coffee cup. They spent the next ten minutes exchanging easy conversation but all too soon, Chuck's watch beeped, signaling it was time he return to work.

Sarah followed him outside the coffee shop and before he could hurry down the street said, "So, tomorrow then?"

"Yeah, tomorrow," Chuck replied, wishing he could find something clever or witty or charming to say, but instead all he did was smile dumbly. "Thanks for the coffee by the way. Don't think I've ever had a girl be the one to take me out on a date."

"Oh, was that a date?"

Before Chuck could apologize for the poor word choice, he caught the amused glint in Sarah's eye and simply chuckled. "I don't know what else we could call it."

"Okay then," Sarah said with a small shrug. "A date."

The excitement blooming in Chuck's chest was overshadowed by the concern he felt about calling his meeting with Sarah a date when she and Bryce hadn't even truly broken off their relationship. He supposed the idea of "taking a break" allowed for certain types of freedoms that he hadn't considered; but still, something about it felt off. Chuck just couldn't reconcile the last 15 minutes with Sarah with the fact that she was in love with another man. Deciding to ignore that small, nagging thought, he smiled, bid Sarah farewell and hurried down the street, feeling as if he could fly the whole way back.

 **o-o-o-o**

"How did it go?"

Sarah had barely walked through the door to the apartment suite before Bryce began questioning her about the results of her "coffee date" mission. Involving Bryce in the mini-op hadn't been part of the original plan, but her new partner seemed insistent on tracking her every move since she'd made her fondness for Chuck clear. Pushing past him so that she could drop her handbag on the bed, she took her time answering, enjoying the way her silence seemed to make him more and more aggravated.

"Walker." His voice was a command now, and Sarah had to struggle not to snap at him in return.

"Everything went smoothly," she said, keeping her eyes focused on the boots she was unlacing. "I'll be joining Chuck and his family in Malibu for the weekend."

"Good," Bryce said, his tone suddenly much calmer. "I expect you'll be ready to take advantage of any opportunity that presents itself to gain Bartowski's trust while you're there."

"Yes." Sarah's response was clipped. She was already struggling with the lies she was now feeding Chuck on a daily basis, she didn't need Bryce believing she couldn't follow through with her mission, so she kept her answer short to mask her roiling emotions.

"Then, while you work on wearing down Bartowski, I'll continue monitoring Roark. As long as we both keep focused," Bryce's eyes flickered over Sarah long enough for her to understand that the comment was meant mostly for her, "Then we should have no problem getting the information we need, infiltrating the base if necessary and wrapping this mission up within the next week or so."

"A week or so?" Sarah said, balking at the short time span Bryce was proposing. A week didn't seem nearly enough time to become acquainted enough with Chuck that he would feel comfortable sharing company secrets. But then again, who was she kidding, it was Chuck. The guy wore his heart on his sleeve. Still, she said, "Don't try and rush this, Bryce. Roark isn't a pushover. We're dealing with a man that could have an entire network of criminal connections at his beck and call. Even if I get the information we need from Chuck, that doesn't mean we can storm into Roark Industries guns blazing. If we get careless, this whole thing could blow up in our faces."

For once, Bryce looked thoughtful. His lips twisted slightly and his eyes narrowed as he pondered the logic of her argument. Finally, he relented with a small shrug. "You're right." Sarah practically savored the two simple words. "We'll take as much time as we need to make sure this mission goes smoothly."

Sarah nodded, not bothering to hide the self- satisfied smirk that spread her lips as Bryce spoke. Assuming the conversation was over for now, Sarah grabbed her bag of toiletries and headed to the bathroom, pausing as Bryce said, "However, considering what a golden opportunity we've been given in the form of Chuck Bartowski, I'll be disappointed if we don't have all we need by the time your beach trip is over, Walker. A spy like you should be able to get the job done quick and easy, right?"

Sarah didn't need to turn around to know that Bryce was watching her with that damn smug expression on his face. She clenched her fists, knuckles turning white against the material of her bag, and responded in the iciest tone she could muster, "I'll get it done."

"Good."

Retreating to the bathroom so that she wouldn't have to deal with Bryce any longer, Sarah locked the door and turned on the shower. She stood in front of the mirror, gripping the edges of the sink, and stared hard at the person looking back at her. Lying to Chuck at the coffee shop had been difficult, to say the least. He was always so sincere and the way he'd unabashedly offered his support towards her fake relationship made her want to scream. Nothing seemed to faze him; he was constantly on her side and he hardly even knew her.

This wasn't what she imagined her job would be. When she joined the CIA, she wanted to help people, save lives, make a difference. She wanted to be a hero. Instead she had become a liar, a mystery—even to herself-a person with no remorse or emotions. She was willingly betraying a good man and his entire family when they done nothing to deserve that sort of treachery. Roark was the villain, not Chuck. And while people like Bryce and Director Graham believed that using Chuck was just a means to an end, Sarah just couldn't justify abusing his trust any longer. In the CIA's terms, he was a civilian. He was innocent. He shouldn't be involved. And Sarah seemed to be the only one that cared. Maybe it was Chuck who incited that humanity within her when she thought it no longer existed. If that were the case, then she couldn't continue to exploit him like this. It wasn't right. But if Bryce or Graham found out how she was thinking she'd be taken off the mission and reassigned in the blink of an eye. She still needed to find information. But maybe there was a way to do her job without ruining the bond she'd formed with the Bartowskis. Finding a way to help Chuck and take down Roark at the same was going to take some very creative spy work. But she was the Sarah Walker. She was the best of the best. Or at least, she had to be now.

For Chuck's sake.

 **o-o-o-o**

Ellie was waiting for Chuck when he got home after work. She sat on the couch inside his apartment, startling him so badly that the yelp he emitted could have woken the entire apartment complex.

"Chuck," she said, rising from the couch and crossing the room to close the front door forcibly behind him without even apologizing for scaring the living hell out of him. "We need to talk."

"God, Ellie, a little warning would have been nice, don't you think?" Chuck said, setting his bag down and moving into the kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. "I do have a phone you know."

Ellie ignored him and leaned over the kitchen counter, pinning him with her most forceful gaze. "Charles Irving Bartowksi. This is serious."

"Alright, Ellie, calm down. I'm all ears." Very rarely did Ellie use Chuck's full name. In fact Chuck only ever remembered hearing it when he was being reprimanded for something. The only person to use his full name in a positive manner had been his father….

"We need to talk about Sarah," Ellie said so off-handedly that Chuck nearly choked on the mouthful of water he'd just swallowed.

"What? What do you mean?"

"Come on, Chuck. You know exactly what I mean. You haven't stopped talking about her for months. I was starting to worry about you. You'd barely gone on a date since the day you met her. Then she shows up at the Buy More out of the blue and your date with Lou just happens to go sour, and now she's coming to the beach house with us?" Ellie's voice was strained, Chuck noticed, but it didn't seem that she was angry.

"Yeah…" he replied cautiously, not knowing exactly where his sister was going with this.

"Chuck, you told me she has a boyfriend now," Ellie said and suddenly Chuck realized what was happening. Ellie was going into big sister mode. After Sarah visited two nights ago, Chuck had been forced to spill all he knew to Ellie about Bryce, his own feelings, his failed date with Lou and the invitation he'd extended to Sarah to go with them on the beach trip. It was obvious now that Ellie had been mulling over the facts since then, allowing them to come to a slow boil and now they were flowing out of her with no filter. "What are you doing to yourself, Chuck?"

"I'm not doing anything, El," he retorted, unable to suppress the defensive tone in his voice. "We're friends. There's nothing past that. We know where we stand with each other and I respect what she has with Bryce."

Ellie snorted loudly. "Come on, Chuck."

"I'm serious!"

"So am I!" Ellie paused and took a deep, calming breath. When she continued, her voice was much more controlled. "Chuck, I still remember what it felt like to watch you fall apart after Jill. You've got such a good heart and people will, and have, taken advantage of it. I don't want to see you get hurt again. That's all."

"El…."

"Sarah's a good person, I know that. I don't think she'd hurt you, not intentionally anyway. But, I just want you to be careful. I don't want to see you go through that much pain again."

Chuck smiled softly and stepped around the kitchen counter to pull his sister into a comforting embrace. "You've always had my back, Ellie, and I love you for that. But I know what I'm doing. I'll be okay. Trust me." Chuck wasn't sure how he put so much confidence into his words when he'd never felt more confused in his life, but luckily, Ellie seemed to be convinced, for now.

"Everything okay in here, guys?" Chuck looked around to see his roommate and best friend, Morgan Grimes, peeking around the hallway corner. His hair was disheveled but his eyes bright and just a tad too wide. Chuck knew the look well and could guess that his friend had been tucked away in his room marathoning video games; most likely _Call of Duty_. "I heard yelling."

"We're fine, buddy," Chuck assured, waving Morgan into the kitchen to join them. "Just talking about the beach trip. Did you talk to Anna?"

"Yeah," Morgan's glassy eyes cleared slightly at the mention of his girlfriend's name. "She said she'd love to come if there's still a spot."

Chuck looked at Ellie for an answer; he could practically see the wheels in her head turning.

"It'll be tight," she said slowly. "There are only two bedrooms, so I guess we'll have to split up the girls and the guys. Or Devon and I could take one, Morgan and Anna the other, but that would leave you and Sarah stuck in the living room-"

"Wait, hold on!" Morgan stopped Ellie with a dramatic wave of his hands. "Sarah's coming? _The_ Sarah?"

Chuck responded with a tight lipped smile. Morgan had been one of the first Chuck told about his encounter with Sarah, especially considering it might not have happened in the first place had Morgan not been too wrapped up in Anna to save him from Jeff and Lester's tyranny. In a strange way, he owed his chance meeting to his best friend's obliviousness, and obviously Morgan hadn't forgotten either.

"No way! Dude!" Morgan was practically trembling with excitement. "She's back in Burbank _and_ she agreed to go on a beach trip with you? Man, this is straight out of a romantic comedy."

"Easy there, buddy," Chuck said, trying to reign Morgan's imagination in before it spun out of control. "She's just tagging along as a friend. She, uh, has a boyfriend now. They just moved into the Maison 23 apartments together."

Morgan's bearded jaw dropped open with an audible 'pop'. "What?"

"What do you mean 'what'?" Chuck now realized that both Morgan and Ellie had fixed him with pensive expressions.

"I call bullshit, dude," Morgan said finally, drawing a satisfied snort from Ellie.

"For once, Morgan," she chirped. "We agree."

"Woah, hold on a second. What are you two talking about?"

"Come on, Chuck!" Morgan groaned, beginning to pace around the kitchen as he spoke. "You really think she agreed to come along because she wants to be your buddy? Women don't do that. Ellie, do women do that?"

"Depends on the woman and the situation," Ellie replied. "But this doesn't add up to me Chuck. Is she really interested in this Bryce guy?"

"You guys are blowing this out of proportion," Chuck argued, beginning to feel a bit cornered. "There's nothing between Sarah and I. There can't be."

Instead of another argument, a slow grin spread on Ellie's face. When Chuck glared and asked her what she thought was so amusing, she simply shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest. "We'll see, Chuck."

Chuck shook his head and scoffed. A part of him appreciated the support his sister and best friend were offering, but more than anything he was growing more and more frustrated with the hope they were helping to fuel. He didn't want to be crushed if what he felt for Sarah could never be realized. He didn't need that pain again. And yet, his mind now whirled with endless possibilities. Why had she agreed to come? Was she interested? Did he even stand a chance? But what about Bryce?

Chuck's head was beginning to hurt now. So he excused himself to his room, leaving Morgan and Ellie to continue theorizing on their own while he got a well-deserved rest.

 **o-o-o-o**

 **February 8** **th** **, 2009, Friday: Burbank, CA**

Chuck had no further communication with Sarah until Friday afternoon when he left work a few hours early to finish packing his things for the trip. Morgan was already prepared and had gone to pick Anna up from her apartment near the Buy More. Ellie and Devon, on the other hand, were still scrambling to make sure they had everything they needed-Or rather, Ellie was scrambling and Devon was doing his best to stay out of her way. Once Chuck had finished his own packing, and helped Devon load everyone's gear and bags into the trunk of their Sienna, he realized he should make sure that Sarah was on her way. After all, as soon as Morgan returned with Anna, the group would be ready to leave.

Devon hurried back into the apartment to finish helping Ellie, leaving Chuck alone in the middle of the courtyard while he pulled out his phone. He hadn't even had a chance to check his messages when the sound of footsteps drew his attention to the north side of the courtyard. Chuck's breath caught in his chest when looked up to see Sarah making her way towards him. She was wearing a long, white sundress that fluttered lightly above the pair of simple sandals adorning her feet. Her long, golden hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail, leaving the ends to curl around her shoulders. The afternoon sun that poured into the courtyard lit upon her pale skin, making it glow and stealing what was left of Chuck's breath.

He racked his brain for something to say as she drew closer. Something, anything; preferably eloquent and charming, or witty, or suave. But nothing came. He could only stare at her, his mind reeling and his heart pounding. She'd stopped in front of him now and it wasn't until this moment that Chuck realized the height difference between them when she wasn't wearing heels or boots. Fleetingly, he wondered if he should be concerned that he found her nearly ten times more attractive when she looked up at him through those long lashes of hers.

 _God, say something, Chuck!_

"Hi," was the only word that he managed to push past his useless tongue, and even then he almost tripped over it.

Sarah chuckled and tilted her head to the side, lifting her shoulder in a small, one-armed shrug. "Hi."

"Hey," Chuck replied again with a goofy grin, mentally kicking himself moments later. _Get it together._ "Glad you could make it. Looks like you forgot to bring your surfboard though."

"Unfortunately. It wouldn't fit in my bag," she teased, her lips twisting into a smile.

"That's a bummer. I mean, funny! That's funny," Chuck stumbled, punctuating his statement with a nervous laugh. "But it's okay, because Devon has two of them. He bought them for him and Ellie so that they could learn together, but Ellie being Ellie and Awesome being Awesome, the 'surf-couple' thing never panned out. I'm sure Devon won't mind letting you borrow one." Chuck snapped his mouth shut when he realized that he was rambling.

"Two, huh?" Sarah mused and Chuck's heart skipped a beat at her suddenly coy expression. "You still want to learn how to surf?"

"If you're willing to teach me," he replied. "Can't promise it will be easy."

"I like a challenge," she replied, her blue eyes burning into Chuck's with an intensity he didn't quite understand. Suddenly it hit him, she was flirting. Or at least…that's what it seemed like. Was it wishful thinking on his part? Would Sarah openly flirt with him? It didn't make sense. She was still with Bryce, after all. Then again, there was that thing Ellie and Morgan had confronted him with a few nights ago….

Luckily, before he could get even more flustered, Ellie and Devon had just arrived to finish throwing their bags in the Sienna and shattering the mood that had built around Chuck and Sarah. Ellie and Sarah exchanged a few friendly pleasantries and Devon was quick to reacquaint himself with her by wrapping Sarah in a brief, but powerful, bear hug. She looked a little dazed afterwards, Chuck noticed. Morgan and Anna arrived as well and after the group had secured all of their bags (and latched Devon's two surfboards to the roof at Chuck's request), they piled into the car, Devon pulled out of Echo Park and they were on their way to Malibu.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah felt like she was going crazy. She never lost her cool on a mission or around a mark. She was a professional. She knew just what persona to don and how to wear it correctly to get what she needed. But sitting in the Woodcomb's car with Chuck's thigh and shoulder pressed against hers, was beginning to make her crack. The feeling was as frustrating as it was unnerving. She was a level-headed spy not a high school girl with a crush.

Devon had rolled the windows down up front, allowing a cool breeze to swirl through the car. It tousled the short curls on Chuck's head, making Sarah's heartbeat quicken whenever she snuck a glance at him from the corner of her eye. Morgan and Anna were in the far back seat giggling, tickling one another and filling the car with a giddy atmosphere. Then Ellie turned on the radio and began belting a song that apparently everyone in the car (except for Sarah) was familiar with, because they all began singing along. Sarah looked up at Chuck while he sang, a brilliant smile lighting up his face. He had a good voice, she noticed, even in spite of the fact that he was practically bellowing along, seemingly trying to outdo Morgan, who wasn't singing so much as he was shouting.

Chuck looked over at her, his amber eyes sparkling and making Sarah's stomach twist into knots. She returned his smile with one of her own before turning to look out the window, hoping he didn't notice the way she was clenching her fists tightly in her lap or the pink tinge coloring her cheeks. This wasn't supposed to happen. She didn't understand these feelings he was inciting in her and it was, quite honestly, terrifying.

When Devon pulled the Sienna up to the front of the rented beach house, Sarah helped him and Ellie unload the bags and supplies while Morgan, Anna and Chuck hurried into the house to examine the interior. It was quite large and luxurious, Sarah noted. It hit her then that this trip must have been quite an investment. Chuck and Ellie hadn't asked her along on a whim. They sincerely wanted to include her on this lavish trip. Sarah felt the guilt weighing heavy in her gut as the realization hit her.

Luckily, Ellie distracted her then by asking if she wanted to help with dinner. Sarah wasn't a chef by any means, but growing up on her own meant she'd had to at least learn the basics, and spending the evening chatting with Ellie seemed much more alluring than spending it lying to Chuck; so she agreed.

They'd only been prepping dinner for a short while when Devon appeared in the doorway, having finished unloading the bags and placing them in their respective rooms.

"Hey ladies, what's cookin'?" he asked, chuckling at his own joke as he made his way past them and opened up the fridge. Ellie rolled her eyes and gave Sarah a pointed look that made her smile. Devon's mood wasn't affected by their lack of amusement, however, and after he'd pulled a beer from the fridge he turned and wrapped an arm around Ellie's waist while he spoke to Sarah. "So, Chuck asked me to bring the boards. You planning on hitting the waves?"

"I'd like to," Sarah murmured, trying to ignore the strange fluttering feeling blooming in her stomach as she watched Devon cradle Ellie against his chest.

"Chuck wants to learn too, you know," Devon continued, taking a quick swig of his beer.

"He's mentioned that once or twice," Sarah said with a wry smile. "I don't mind teaching him."

Ellie snorted loudly. "You sure about that? My brother has a lot of good qualities but coordination is not one of them."

Sarah just shrugged. "Everyone has to start somewhere." Ellie's eyes narrowed slightly and that was when Sarah realized that Chuck's older sister hadn't just asked for Sarah's company in the kitchen to be friendly. This was about to turn into an interrogation, Sarah knew. She'd been prepared for a questioning from Chuck's sister, it was bound to come eventually, but even still, Sarah felt an uncharacteristic nervousness rising in her chest even before Ellie spoke.

When she did, it was clear from her tone that Sarah had been right about Ellie's true intentions. "So, Sarah. Chuck tells me you've got a boyfriend now. Was he not interested in coming on the trip with us?"

"He's not really a beach person. Plus he's been a little tied up with work lately," Sarah said quickly, hoping Ellie would let it rest at that. She did not.

"That's unfortunate. You'll have to bring him around Echo Park sometime then. We'd love to meet him, right Devon?"

Devon, whose baffled expression told Sarah that he knew nothing about Bryce, just nodded hesitantly. "Sure?"

"What does he do?" Ellie said, her focus on the large bowl of salad that she was tossing.

"He's an accountant." Truth be told, they had not decided what the specifics of their cover jobs would be yet. Bryce didn't seem to think anyone would be asking them, so they could keep it vague and stay safe. Accountant was the first job that popped into Sarah's head. She would have to remember to tell Bryce, sooner rather than later, in order to keep their cover air tight.

"An accountant? Sounds interesting," Ellie said, finally taking her gaze off of her work and turning her attention to Sarah.

"Yeah," Sarah replied with a feigned smile. She was butchering this and she knew it. Ellie was astute and even though she was maintaining an interested expression, Sarah could tell she was getting suspicious in the way her brown eyes flashed. Devon had inched his way to the kitchen door during the conversation, the topic and odd back-and-forth between his wife and Sarah making him far too uncomfortable to stick around. Ellie watched him slip around the corner, and only when he was gone did she do something that Sarah had not been expecting. Ellie took a step forward and put a comforting hand on Sarah's arm; it was all she could do not to flinch away in shock. She wasn't used to being touched like this.

"Listen, Sarah. You can be honest with me. I've been through my fair share of rough relationships, and if you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you." Sarah searched Ellie's face for any sign of insincerity or interrogation, but there was none. This woman she hardly knew was offering unabashed friendship and trust. And Sarah didn't quite know what to do with that offer.

"I will," she said finally and Ellie's smile grew. "Thank you, Ellie. That's….Well it's nice to know that someone…that _you_ …care. But, I promise you, I'm fine. Really."

Ellie nodded, finally seeming to accept Sarah's answer, and returned to her prep station. A voice from the doorway drew their attention..

"Hey ladies, what's cook—"

"Nope," Ellie interrupted her brother before he could finish. "Sorry Chuck, Devon beat you to the stupid jokes already."

"What?" Chuck's entire visage slumped. "I've been saving that one for almost an hour!"

Ellie just shook her head and leaned towards Sarah, murmuring, "You don't regret coming along yet, do you?"

Sarah giggled and looked up at Chuck, who seemed to have recovered from his disappointment and was now roaming through the kitchen, peering curiously at the various dishes they'd set along the counter. Sarah noticed he looked more casual and relaxed than she'd seen him in the last few days. He wore a dark brown shirt, the sleeves pulled up to his elbows, and a worn pair of faded jeans. She realized, quickly, that she was staring; her eyes roaming over Chuck's torso, enthralled by the way the material of the shirt accentuated his lean figure. She snapped her gaze away just in time to avoid being caught by Chuck as he grinned at her with a stolen cherry tomato in between his teeth. However, she had not been quick enough to avoid being caught by Ellie whose quiet smirk told Sarah that she'd seen the way she was watching Chuck. Before she could think of something to say to Ellie to cover for herself, Chuck's actions saved her. He plucked another tomato out of the salad bowl in front of Ellie, drawing an exasperated sigh from his sister.

"Chuck!" Ellie shouted, swatting his arm away and shooing him out of the kitchen. "You're going to ruin the presentation. Get out of here and make yourself useful while we finish. Go and find the games Devon packed."

"Alright, alright!" Chuck laughed, raising his arms over his head to defend himself against Ellie's attack. Sarah watched him go, hoping he didn't see the blush that rose on her cheeks when he stuck his tongue out at his sister once her back was turned, and gave Sarah a knowing smirk.

 **o-o-o-o**

The group assembled in the large dining room a while later, taking their places at the table and passing food back and forth while chatting amiably. It occurred to Sarah that she hadn't been a part of a gathering like this since she was a child and even then, family dinners tended to be terse reunions. If one passed without her mother and father spending the entire night arguing, she counted herself lucky.

Sitting here with these people that made her feel so comfortable in the calming glow of the sunset that poured through the large windows, Sarah was unable to contain the joy bubbling up inside her. It wasn't long before she'd abandoned all thoughts regarding her mission, turned off her phone to avoid dealing with Bryce and taken up Ellie's offer for a second glass of wine.

After dinner, Morgan suggested they play a few games with the deck of cards he'd brought along—although his proposal to turn the game into strip poker wasn't as well received. When a much less innocent game of Blackjack was agreed upon, Sarah found herself less intrigued by her own hand and more interested in watching Chuck play. She knew he was a clever guy, but it was becoming more and more obvious as the game progressed and Chuck continued to win round after round. If they'd been playing for money, he would have robbed them blind. And as she continued to study him, Sarah realized just how impressed she was with Chuck's intellect; maybe even a little bit attracted to it, but that was probably just the wine talking. Or so she hoped.

They played late into the night until Devon began yawning loudly every thirty seconds or so, and Ellie decided that they should all call it a night. There was a bit of an awkward scuffle when they realized that rooms had yet to be assigned. But in the end it was decided that Ellie and Devon would share the master bedroom, Morgan and Anna the guest room, and that left Chuck and Sarah to find a way to occupy the living room. Luckily, the plush armchairs and large, cushioned couch meant that they wouldn't lack for a soft place to sleep.

The others quickly retreated to their rooms, leaving Sarah and Chuck alone in the living room in awkward silence. Chuck clapped his hands together nervously before he set about spreading the blankets Ellie brought out for them on the floor in front of the fire place.

"Chuck, you don't have to sleep on the floor," Sarah said, feeling guilty as she watched him continue to spread the blankets out on his knees. "We can share the couch."

Chuck looked over his shoulder, his eyebrows quirked as he examined the soft—but rather compact-looking couch. Sarah thought she saw the hint of a blush on Chuck's cheeks, but it was hard to tell in the dark.

"Nah, that's alright. It's all yours. I tend to stretch out when I sleep and in order for both of us to fit on that thing, we'd have to…." Chuck trailed off, finishing his sentence by clapping his hands together and locking his fingers tightly. Sarah could only assume he meant that they'd have to squeeze together to fit but the gesture had been so strange looking that she snorted a short laugh. Chuck looked down at his hands, pulling them apart quickly and tucking them behind his back, obviously embarrassed.

"Okay then," Sarah said, drawing the words out in a sigh as she collapsed onto the couch. "The couch is all mine." She wasn't sure if it was the warm, buzz the wine had given her or just the natural giddiness she felt around Chuck, but for the first time in a long time she felt free; light and unburdened by the stress of her job or the constant pressure of keeping up a persona during a mission. Turning her head to the side, she saw that Chuck had also flopped onto his back, his hands laced behind his head as he stared at the ceiling with a light smile.

"Just so you know," he said suddenly, tucking his chin to his chest so that he could meet her gaze. "Morgan tends to sleepwalk."

"Oh?"

"In the nude."

"What?" Sarah lifted herself up onto her elbow so that she could see Chuck's face better. The lift in his brows and slight twist of his lips told her he wasn't lying and that he'd probably experienced it first-hand.

"Thanks for the warning," she said slowly.

Chuck smiled and then rolled onto his side, propping his head in his hand before continuing. "Are you a deep sleeper?"

"No. Why?"

"Er," Chuck paused and scrunched up his nose. Sarah found herself staring at the bridge of his nose where the tiny wrinkles formed while he spoke. "He and Anna can be a little….loud?"

It took Sarah a moment to register what he'd said and when she did, she made a face. "Would they really…? With everyone in the house?"

Chuck fell onto his back and sniggered to himself. "It wouldn't be the first time. It was rough in the beginning, when we first became roommates. Can't say I totally blame the guy though. Especially not out here. This place is practically built for romantic getaways."

Sarah didn't have a response for that. He was right. The beach, the impressive house, the relaxing atmosphere, everything here screamed for romance and poor Chuck was stuck lying on the floor in the living room while his best friend and sister got to spend the night cuddled happily with their partners. She felt the guilt rising and constricting her chest once more. Then, as if Chuck could read her thoughts, he said, "Thank you for coming, Sarah."

"You're thanking _me_?" she asked incredulously. "Don't you think it should be the other way around?"

He chuckled and pulled his blankets up to his chin. "I guess. But at least now that you're here I won't have to be the only one to suffer through a Morgan and Anna fun-filled night."

"Oh, so this is a misery loves company kind of thing?" she teased, earning a grin from Chuck that quickly turned into an enormous yawn. Curling onto his side and tugging the blankets closer around his long body, Chuck closed his eyes and murmured, "G'night, Sarah" before falling silent. Sarah watched him for a while after that, studying the way his breathing slowed and his eyelids fluttered as he dreamed. An unexpected warmth, one not due to the effects of the wine, bloomed in her chest as she watched him sleep. Normally, Sarah would have analyzed the feeling; beaten it to death until she understood it, turned it upside down, sideways and forwards. But right now, 'why' didn't matter. Instead, she let the feeling take over; sitting back and enjoying the buoyant happiness that spread through her. She fought sleep for as long as she could, trying to spend as much time with this new and wonderful feeling as possible. But all too soon, Sarah's eyes slipped shut of their own accord and she fell asleep, her last fleeting thought was hoping that she would be lucky enough to never experience Morgan Grimes' sleep walking habit.

 **o-o-o-o**

* * *

 _Thank you for reading! Until next time._


	4. Chapter 4

_Hello! A quick thanks to everyone for your patience and continued support. This chapter went through quite the editing process, so if you all find an issue I'm going to point fingers at **michaelfmx**. Anything and everything is his fault. I don't want to take up too much time in the A/N up here, but look at the end of this chapter for a few replies I want to answer personally._

 _Enough of all that, enjoy!_

* * *

 **February 9** **th** **, 2009: Malibu, CA, 0800 hours:**

The warmth of the early morning sun drifting in through the beach house's large windows woke Sarah. For a brief moment, she didn't remember where she was, but then she caught sight of the rumpled nest of blankets Chuck had slept in last night. They were empty now, long abandoned by the sight of it. Sitting up and throwing off her own blankets, she looked around the empty living area and connected dining room. It was there she saw Chuck, sitting at the dining table tapping rapidly on the keyboard of his laptop. Sarah wasn't sure exactly what time it was, but the light pink horizon outside told her that the sun had just barely risen. She pulled one of the blankets around her shoulders and shuffled towards Chuck. He was so engrossed in whatever he was typing that he didn't notice her approach until she plopped down in the chair next to him and gave a cheerful, "Good morning."

Chuck jumped, grabbing the top of his laptop as if prepared to slam it shut. When he realized that it was Sarah who had joined him, he relaxed and grinned sheepishly.

"Morning. Sorry, if I woke you. I was trying to be quiet."

Sarah shook her head and gestured to the laptop. "Did you bring work with you?"

"Huh?" Chuck blinked at her and then at his computer, running his fingers through his hair nervously. "Er, no. This is, uh, just a personal project."

"A personal project?" Chuck continued to avoid her gaze. In fact, he even tilted the computer away from her just enough so that the screen was unreadable from where she sat. It struck Sarah as odd that Chuck was acting so secretive. She couldn't imagine what he could possibly be working on that was making him so nervous if it wasn't something for Roark. But she was sure as hell going to find out.

"It's really…nerdy," Chuck said finally, his fingers now combing through the fine hairs at the nape of his neck.

"Chuck," Sarah urged, her voice dropping to a murmur. "Come on. You can tell me."

Chuck's amber gaze met her own and for a brief moment Sarah felt breathless. She'd never met anyone that could affect her with little more than a glance, but Chuck was becoming more and more disarming as they continued to spend time together. He licked his lips hesitantly, then he blew out a rush of air and turned the computer towards her.

"I'm programming a game," he said, gesturing to the screen full of codes, notes and numbers that looked like a bunch of gibberish to Sarah. "In college, I was part of a tabletop RPG club. I know, don't laugh. But we always talked about turning our ideas into something that people all over the world could enjoy. Back then it was just pen and paper, but working with Roark has given me the chance to really stretch what I can do with my degree."

"Software engineering?" Sarah asked, making sure she still remembered what he'd told her. Chuck nodded enthusiastically.

"Now, if I were to turn this into something more serious, I would need a whole team of people to help create the rest of the game. But I'm starting off simple. Just coding and programming some of the stuff my friends and I made up in school."

Sarah's eyes never left Chuck's face while he spoke. The excitement lighting up his amber eyes as he explained his process was making her heart flutter. Finally, Chuck caught himself. Reeling in his excitement, he looked at Sarah, an uncertain wrinkle forming between his brows. "Sorry. I got a little carried away. Morgan's the only one I've been able to talk to about this."

"Chuck, this is amazing."

Chuck perked instantly, a slow grin taking over his face. "Not nerdy?"

"Well, it's that too."

He laughed, and the sound of it seemed to fill the room with warmth. "Thank you. That means a lot…. coming from you."

"You haven't shared this with anybody besides Morgan? Don't you think Roark would be interested?" Sarah hadn't actually intended to steer the conversation back towards Ted Roark, but the moment she did, Chuck's face closed off again. Sarah found the sudden change in his mood a little concerning, but decided not to pursue it for the moment.

"No. He's pretty focused on the big project my department is working on. It's," Chuck paused, worrying his lips between his teeth and that line between his brows, that Sarah found unbearably adorable, deepening. "I'm not supposed to talk about it outside of work. Roark doesn't want anything leaking to our competition. Not that I think you're our competition or that you'd go around spreading secrets! I just…"

Sarah didn't know what to say. Or rather, she knew what she _should_ say, but she couldn't open her mouth. She knew she should prompt Chuck to tell her. Promise that she wouldn't let the secret slip. But that would be a downright lie. Sarah could not bring herself to look Chuck in the eye, tell him that his work secrets were safe with her, and then call Graham or Bryce with the results immediately afterwards.

"I understand," she said finally, after the silence between them had stretched a bit too long. It seemed like a neutral enough answer for now. Luckily, Ellie and Devon decided to join them in the kitchen at that very moment, saving both Chuck and Sarah from having to continue struggling through their conversation. Chuck closed his laptop and greeted his sister and brother-in-law, offering to make coffee or help with breakfast, leaving Sarah to stare at her fists clenched in her lap and wonder why it was suddenly so damn hard to do her job.

 **February 9** **th** **, 2009: Burbank, CA: 0800 Hours**

Bryce threw his cellphone down on the bed in frustration after the tone of Sarah's voicemail beeped in his ear for the fifteenth time. It was clear to him now that she didn't intend on contacting him anytime soon; possibly for the entire weekend. She'd turned her phone off the second she left the apartment complex and he hadn't been able to reach her since. Bryce stood in front of the apartment's wall-to-floor, windows and crossed his arms, peering out at the city of Los Angeles as the sun rose.

Never before had he worked with such an infuriatingly stubborn partner as Sarah Walker. When Bryce first met her in Langston Graham's office, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't impressed by what he saw. Her file wasn't bad either; except for the fallout she'd had with the CATs special unit, her record was flawless. When Graham had proposed the mission to him and offered that he partner with Sarah, Bryce had been intrigued to say the least. Graham had mentioned, however, that Walker had an independent streak that could sometimes make her a bit of a wildcard. But to Bryce, that spelled excitement. Or it had back then, at least; back before they'd arrived in Burbank. Sarah seemed utterly immune to every trick Bryce had up his sleeve. Bryce had always been popular with women, especially fellow agents. He hadn't expected Sarah to be any different. She had seemed distant and uninterested from the start, but it only got worse the moment they had arrived in Burbank. It had all clicked into place, however, when Charles Irving Bartowski came stumbling into the picture.

Bryce wasn't entirely sure of the connection his partner had with the gangly, wide-eyed, nerd, but there was undoubtedly something between the two of them that was stopping Sarah from complying with Bryce on this mission. And it was beyond frustrating. He knew he couldn't involve Graham though, no matter how often he threatened Sarah that he would. The Director would undoubtedly be disappointed if Bryce fumbled this mission because of a slight communication issue with his partner. If Sarah insisted on doing things her own way, then Bryce was prepared to do the same. First, he needed to find out all he could about Charles "Chuck" Bartowski. The man had a connection to Roark. And because Sarah had decided to take her sweet time getting the information out of him, Bryce decided it was time he take matters into his own hands. Donning his civilian clothes, Bryce left the apartment, taking only his phone and keys, and headed on foot to the local Buy More where he'd first met Chuck.

The store was relatively busy, but Bryce pushed past the crowds effortlessly and approached the comparatively vacant Nerd Herd desk, ringing the small bell to get the attention of the two employees that sat with their backs to him. The first employee, a short Indian man, swiveled in his chair and greeted Bryce.

"Can I help you?" he drawled, raising his thick eyebrows and appraising Bryce with a somewhat bored expression. Bryce clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to punch the man square in his smug little face, and instead plastered on a fake smile of his own.

"I sure hope so. I'm looking for Chuck Bartowski."

The man, whose name Bryce noticed was 'Lester' according to the tag on his chest, narrowed his beady eyes and sneered. "Why?"

"I'm an old friend of his, just visiting from out of town. Last I heard from him he was working here as a supervisor." Bryce pulled his lie from what he'd learned at the lunch he shared with Chuck and Sarah only a few days ago. The lie would fall apart if Lester and his glass-eyed lackey asked too many questions, but Bryce guessed that the two of them weren't that astute.

"Sorry, Charles is no longer an employee of the Buy More," Lester said, leaning back in his chair and folding his hands over his chest.

"Oh no?" Bryce's brows rose past the brim of the baseball cap he wore. "Do you know where I can find him?"

"He works for Roark Instruments now," Lester said dismissively. "I wouldn't go looking for him if I were you though. They guy's changed a lot since he left."

"How so?" Bryce asked, throwing just enough concern into his tone to keep Lester talking.

"He's arrogant," Lester said. "Cocky. Thinks just because Roark scoped him out that he deserves to be in the big leagues now."

"What do you mean scoped him out?"

Lester leaned forward, gesturing for Bryce to do the same, until they were huddled over the Nerd Herd counter. "Ted Roark came in here a few months ago and snatched up our "brightest" employees, right out from under Big Mike's nose." Bryce didn't know who Big Mike was, but that wasn't what caught his attention. Roark had come looking for people with prior knowledge regarding engineering and software; employees with a specific skill set. People already good at their jobs; employees that he wouldn't have to waste time training. People he needed to make something very particular. But what? Lester continued to ramble on about how unfair the situation was while Bryce struggled to put the pieces together in his head. He was still missing something big, and talking to these morons wasn't going to get him any closer.

"Thanks for the help," he said, cutting Lester off mid-sentence with a congenial smile. "I think I'll just give Chuck a call." Turning on his heel, Bryce hurried out of the Buy More towards Roark Industries, leaving a very confused Lester in his wake.

 **o-o-o-o**

As soon as Anna and Morgan had risen and prepared for the day, they gathered their beach gear and trudged down the long stretch of sand together. Ellie and Devon led the pack, swinging an enormous picnic basket between them, while Morgan and Anna carried two large beach umbrellas, towels, and a bag full of sunblock bottles. That left Chuck and Sarah to haul the surfboards that Devon had been kind enough to lend them. Chuck carried his above his head, using it as protection from the glare of the mid-morning sun. Sarah kept pace beside him, her own surfboard tucked underneath her arm. Chuck couldn't help but notice the excitement taking over her features as they drew closer to the water and he remembered what it felt like the first time he had watched her surf before they'd even met one another. He only hoped that he'd be able to share in some of that passion and wonder this time.

Ellie directed the group to a particularly sandy spot, and ordered Morgan to set up towels and umbrellas while Devon was tasked with handing out sunblock. Chuck propped his board in the sand, and set about applying sunscreen to the skin not covered by his board shorts, trying to avoid looking at Sarah who was doing the same thing over her own swimsuit, but she was doing it in a way that was making his imagination run amuck. Chuck quickly discovered that he wasn't being as furtive with his sidelong glances as he thought he was because Ellie cleared her throat and gave him a critical look and then Sarah caught him staring as well; but she only smirked when Chuck's ears turned red and he continued slathering sunblock onto his body in embarrassed silence.

As soon as everyone was ready, Devon dug a Frisbee out of his personal beach bag and suggested they start the day off with a game. It was quickly decided that girls versus boys would be the best way to split into teams and Chuck helped Devon construct a rudimentary playing field by drawing lines in the sand with pieces of driftwood.

Devon went over the rules and they quickly set up a makeshift playing field on an open stretch of sand. Chuck saw Devon wink at Ellie and Morgan snickering with Anna. It looked like everybody was ready to have some fun. Then he looked across at Sarah and he shivered involuntarily. She was staring at Chuck with an uncomfortable intensity, her blue eyes flashing a challenge at him. It was a little terrifying, Chuck thought to himself, but mostly it filled him with determination. Sarah wasn't about go easy on him because this was a casual beach game, and the only way that Chuck was going to impress her was if he played just as hard. As Devon counted down to start the game, Chuck narrowed his eyes at Sarah and lifted his chin, wordlessly daring her to bring all she had. The tiny quirk of her lips, told him she understood.

And then Devon shouted and tossed the Frisbee to Ellie, putting the girls on the offensive, and the game began. Sarah took off like a bolt of lightning, dashing past Chuck so quickly that he could have sworn he felt a rush of wind as she passed. She sped down the sand past Morgan, who was putting up little effort to stop her anyway, and continued towards the end zone, raising her hands to Ellie. Ellie ducked under Devon, who was waving his arms in front of her like a maniac, and tossed the Frisbee to Anna. She stuck her tongue out at Morgan before faking a pass to the right, only to throw around his left towards Sarah, who was already standing deep in the end zone. Chuck didn't even have a chance to try and intercept the throw before it soared over his head, and into Sarah's hands. In less than a minute the girls had scored the first point. Chuck, Morgan and Devon exchanged dumbfounded expressions while the girls met in the middle and high fived one another. Sarah caught Chuck's eye in the midst of their celebration and raised an eyebrow at him. _Game on,_ Chuck thought.

The next play went much the same way, except that Devon was far more adamant in trying to block Ellie's throw and managed to knock down her pass. Morgan scooped up the fallen Frisbee and looked to Chuck, who immediately took off down to the opposite end zone, while Devon continued to distract his wife somewhat teasingly. Morgan made a great throw that cleared Anna's outstretched arms easily and soared towards Chuck. Chuck raised his hands, eyes trained on the Frisbee, fingers flexed, ready to catch it and score. But suddenly, there was a blur of movement in front of him, and the Frisbee was gone. Chuck stared at the empty air, blinking in confusion, until he looked down and realized that Sarah was standing directly in front of him, with the Frisbee in her hands. She'd intercepted the pass midair, so quickly that he hadn't had time to register the steal. Sarah glanced over her shoulder at him briefly, that playful smirk still on her lips, before throwing the disc to Anna, who'd charged down to the opposite end of the field once Morgan was distracted. Point number two for the girls.

The girls scored twice more before the boys finally managed to score a single point, and that was only because Devon finally realized that covering Sarah was the only way they'd have a chance at taking back the Frisbee and going on the offensive. And even then, he'd barely managed to keep her at bay. Morgan grudgingly awarded Sarah the title of "The Flash", his frown deepening in disappointment when she just looked confused by the reference. Finally, Devon called for a huddle, grabbing Chuck and Morgan by their shoulders and pulling them in so that their conversation wouldn't be overhead.

"What the hell is going on?" Devon panted. "Come on guys, how are we losing to a bunch of ladies?"

 _We're losing to Sarah,_ Chuck mused, somewhat proudly. Aloud, he said, "We've got to throw them off. Let's make more short passes to each other as we head downfield. The more we move the Frisbee around, the less of a chance they'll have to isolate one of us from the other two."

"Good plan, Chuck," Morgan said, glancing over his shoulder at the girls waiting impatiently nearby; particularly Sarah, who was watching them pensively, one hand planted on her hip. "So who's going to the end zone this time?"

"I'll do it," Chuck offered. "Devon, you and Morgan keep the Frisbee in motion for as long as you can. Keep passing it back and forth as much as you can. Once they're distracted, I'll move into position and then you make a long pass down to me. Ok?"

"Awesome," Devon agreed with an enormous grin. The boys broke their huddle and met the girls in the middle of the field, squaring up one-on-one again. Ellie put the Frisbee in play, tossing it to Devon. Following Chuck's plan, he and Morgan started passing the Frisbee back and forth. When Chuck realized nobody was paying attention to him, he took off down the beach. He sprinted across the sand as fast as his legs would carry him, ignoring the shouts of the game behind him and focusing on reaching the end zone. As he drew closer, Chuck turned his head to look over his shoulder just in time to see Devon throw the Frisbee in his direction. It was a high throw, but if he just ran a little bit farther and reached a little higher he could-

"Chuck! Look out!"

Morgan's cry drew his attention away from the Frisbee and back to where he was running. Sarah was right in front of him, reaching for the same pass, trying to intercept it again. But this time she and Chuck were on a collision course. He dug his heels into the sand, but his momentum was too much, and he barreled into her before he could stop himself entirely. The world spun when they collided, but Chuck remained mindful enough to lock his arms around Sarah as they tumbled to the ground, using the momentum he'd built to swing himself around so that she wouldn't be the one crushed beneath him. Chuck landed on his back hard enough that the wind left his lungs. His one thought before he opened his eyes to assess the damage was that sand was not as soft as it was made out to be.

And when he did open his eyes, ready to apologize to Sarah for careening into her, the words died on his lips. She'd landed directly on top of him, safe and seemingly unharmed, and also close enough for Chuck to count every single one of her eyelashes. She stared at him, her elbows braced on either side of his head, the smooth skin of her belly pressed to his. Chuck's eyes slid to her lips. They were parted slightly and quivering as she struggled for breath. Chuck wasn't sure if he'd ever believed in the possibility of spontaneous human combustion more than he did in this moment, because every inch of his body felt like it had just been set on fire. And then, before he could actually discover if he might explode, the moment was over. Sarah scrambled off him and pulled him to his feet, taking a safe step back before asking if he was okay.

Chuck nodded wordlessly, only now realizing that standing up sent a shock of pain through him. The rest of the group had reached them by now; Ellie and Devon quickly assessing them for injuries.

"You two okay?" he said, turning Chuck around and scanning him while Ellie did the same for Sarah. "That was a nasty looking fall."

"Fine, fine," Chuck said, wincing when Devon pushed him forward slightly, sending another wave of pain through his tailbone. "Um, Devon? Is it possible for a person to break their butt?"

Devon raised his brows before bursting with laughter. "I doubt you broke anything, Chuck. Let alone your butt. You most likely bruised your tailbone a little bit. No surprise though, landing the way you did."

"I'm sorry," Sarah said, gently pushing Ellie's worried hands away. "I should have been watching where I was going."

"No, it's okay," Chuck insisted. "I'm the one that ran into you. It was my fault."

Ellie glanced between the two of them, scrutinizing the small smile Sarah gave Chuck as he apologized. Chuck caught her gaze and cleared his throat nervously. "I think I'll sit the next round out. But don't let me spoil the fun, you all can keep playing."

"No, we can't," Anna quipped, crossing her arms. "We don't have enough players now for even teams, Chuckles."

"No big deal," Devon said. "I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the girls had this game in the bag anyway. Why don't we all take a break and relax?"

Everybody agreed and made their way back to the umbrellas and towels, Chuck hobbling along behind the others, since each step sent a fire through his buttocks. Sarah fell into step beside him and no matter how often Chuck assured her that he was fine, she still wore a vaguely guilty expression. They made their way to their towels and large beach umbrella and Chuck rolled onto his stomach, laying his chin on his arms and watching Morgan and Anna-who had decided that they wanted to go for a swim instead-wade into the water and splash each other playfully. Sarah took a seat beside him, hugging her legs to her chest, her gaze on the waves. Chuck was about to tell her that she didn't have to sit there with him when he felt her hand rest lightly against the back of his neck. Chuck hoped she didn't feel the way he tensed when she touched him; not that the contact was unwelcome by any means. But the intimacy of the gesture surprised him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, her voice almost lost beneath the sound of the waves.

"I'm fine, I promise!" Chuck's reply came a little too quickly to be convincing but it was hard to concentrate with Sarah's fingers threaded loosely through the ends of his hair. "Think you'll still be able to teach me to surf now that I'm handicapped?"

Sarah giggled, taking her hand away and leaving Chuck yearning for its return. "I'll do my best."

"You don't have to sit with me, you know," Chuck said after a moment of silence. "I don't want to keep you from enjoying the day."

"It's okay. I don't mind. Besides, someone has to watch over you and make sure you don't get tricked into another sand trap."

"So I can count on you to keep an eye out for any of my former vengeful coworkers looking to toss me into a pit today?"

"I've got your back."

Chuck shook his head and snorted, but he couldn't deny how happy it made him feel to know that she was also thinking about their first meeting on this beach, no matter how pathetic he'd seemed at the time. He rolled onto his back, careful to avoid putting too much pressure on his injured rear, and looked up at her with a shy grin.

"I'm almost convinced this beach is cursed. I can't seem to come here without embarrassing myself in front of you."

Sarah smiled, propping her cheek against her fist and shrugging her shoulders. "You make it memorable." She seemed to realize what she'd said at the same moment he did and looked away quickly, busying herself by applying more sunscreen to her legs and arms. Chuck's heart dropped and he turned his head away from her to watch Ellie and Devon, who sat nearby, cuddled on their own beach towel. It was gut wrenching to be so close, so sociable, with the woman he hadn't stopped thinking about for months, and not being able to do anything but offer her his friendship. Chuck would rather be her friend than be nothing at all, but still, it was painful and he wanted more every second he spent with her. He had just decided that now was as good a time as any to ask her about Bryce when Sarah made a small, startled noise and leapt to her feet.

"I'll be right back, forgot something!" She threw the last part over her shoulder as she dashed back towards the beach house, leaving Chuck alone to nurse his sore rear and bruised ego.

 **Burbank, CA: 1100 Hours**

Bryce stepped through the automatic doors of Roark Industries and approached the large security desk situated in the middle of the lobby. It was going to be a longshot, but if he could peek into Chuck's office, even for just a moment, Bryce might be able to obtain the information they needed and then he wouldn't have to wait for Sarah to keep dancing nervously around her mission.

Approaching the desk, Bryce offered the burly security guard a charming smile. "Good morning. I'm looking for Chuck Bartowski. Is he in today?"

The security guard scowled at Bryce and grunted, "Who's asking?"

"Bryce. Bryce Larkin. I'm an old friend of his, just visiting from out of town. I was hoping I could drop in and surprise him." The guard's eyes narrowed further and Bryce saw the muscles in his jaw clench.

"Bryce Larkin?"

"Yes." Bryce met the man's unwavering stare with his own. He wasn't intimidated by the burly guard, but something in the way the man looked at him told him he'd said something wrong.

The guard crossed his arms and growled, "Chuck's not here."

"Uh huh," Bryce drew the words out slowly. This guard was giving him little to work with. "Do you have any idea where I might find him? Could I leave a message in his office letting him know I stopped by?"

"No," the man grunted. "The area beyond the lobby is for RI employees only."

"Of course, I understand. Protocol and all that," Bryce said, throwing in another pleasant smile. "But I'm sure Chuck wouldn't mind if I popped in for just a second-"

"You said you're a close friend of his?" The guard interrupted.

"We go back a ways," Bryce replied, careful to keep his answer just a little bit vague. The guard nodded, something akin to a disbelieving smirk on his face. Then he chuckled, shook his head and pointed to the door. "I'll let Chuck know you stopped by. Have a nice day."

Bryce stared dumbfounded, his jaw clenching in frustration as the guard gestured towards the door again, dismissing him wordlessly. Narrowing his eyes, Bryce gave the large man one last tight lipped smile before turning on his heel and hurrying out the automatic doors.

Casey watched Bryce go with a grimace. It didn't bode well for Chuck that the man he'd been about to look up during his lunch break was now on the hunt for him, pretending they were good buddies. Whatever sort of mess Chuck had gotten himself into, Casey decided then and there that he was going to watch the kid's back, no matter what.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah had gone back to the beach house with two things in mind. First, she needed to grab the pink beach towel she'd brought specifically for Chuck; the same one he'd used six months ago during their first meeting. She hoped he'd enjoy the not-so-subtle throwback. Secondly, it was high time she contacted Bryce regarding the status of her mission. He'd probably be disappointed that Chuck hadn't spilled every secret he knew to her at this point, but if Sarah was being honest with herself, she knew that she hadn't been trying that hard. Being around Chuck was somehow both soothing and disarming. And it wasn't like she hadn't had plenty of opportunities to catch him off guard.

She could have coaxed information out of him last night when they were both a little buzzed and loose enough for the occasional slip of the tongue. But she hadn't. She could have cornered him this morning when he'd had his laptop open and there had been nobody but the two of them. No interruptions. But she hadn't. She could have continued their conversation while Chuck nursed his injury on the beach. Sarah knew it would be easy to get him flustered, she'd noticed the way he was looking at her all morning and she hadn't picked out the bright red bikini she was currently wearing for nothing. She'd completely expected it to affect Chuck the way it did. What she hadn't expected was how Chuck was affecting her. Watching him run around on the beach all morning, and even before that when she'd seen his broad shoulders flex as he covered his tan skin in sunscreen, made Sarah realize something. Chuck was, for lack of a better word…hot. And it wasn't something that she'd noticed before, simply because Chuck had been in such a low place when they first met. He'd been cute, sure, with his wild curls, large doe eyes, and nose-wrinkling grin. But the way he carried himself now, the combination of the confidence in his gaze, his put together appearance, and now his surprising physique, were doing strange things to Sarah's focus.

And then, to make matters worse (or better really), she'd toppled into him during the game. It was purely an accident, she'd been too focused on the competition to even think about setting up an intimate moment with Chuck. But it had happened and Sarah had been made breathless for the first time in her career as a spy. Chuck's brown eyes were even more beautiful up close, as were his unbelievably long lashes. She remembered the lance of fire that had coursed through her body when she realized just how close his lips were to her own, and she could still feel the way his chest had heaved against hers as they struggled to catch their breath. The moment had been far more arousing than Sarah had expected and she wasn't sure that she'd been totally successful repressing the shivers that had racked her body when Ellie checked her over for injuries. If Chuck's sister had noticed though, she didn't show it.

Shaking her head to clear her mind, Sarah crossed into the living room, reaching into her bag and pulling out Chuck's pink towel while simultaneously snatching up her cell phone that she'd left on the nightstand. When it powered up she was greeted with a notification telling her she had _15 voicemails_ in her inbox. And all from Bryce Larkin. Sighing, Sarah dialed his number, not surprised when Bryce picked up on the second ring.

"Finally. What the hell have you been doing? Why haven't you answered my calls?" Bryce's voice was clipped and hurried and Sarah sensed that something other than the missed phone calls was bothering him.

"I've been doing my job," she replied easily. "Do you really think the best way to go about getting to know the Bartowskis would be to call my boyfriend as soon as I get the chance?"

Bryce made a quiet growling noise in the back of his throat. "So what have you learned? Anything about Roark? Anything regarding Chuck's involvement?"

"I've been here for less than a day, Bryce."

"And? Doesn't seem to me like seducing Bartowski should be the mission of the century."

"Would you like to come and give it a shot then?" Sarah hissed into the mouthpiece. Bryce just chuckled and took a steadying breath before speaking again.

"I took a look inside of Roark Industries just now."

"What?" That hadn't been a part of the plan, or at least not that Bryce had mentioned.

"I didn't get very far. Roark's got tight security and the lead guard seems to know Chuck personally. I tried to get into his office to take a look at his computer, but it looks like cracking Bartowski is still going to be up to you."

"And what happens to Chuck if I do find what we need?" Sarah found herself asking. "He won't have to be involved in this anymore, right? We can focus on taking down Roark."

"I don't think it's that black and white," Bryce said slowly. "Whether or not Bartowski is willingly a part of whatever Roark is doing may not matter in the eyes of our superiors. He's playing a role in a criminal's plan. He's a part of this no matter what happens."

Sarah felt her blood run cold and Bryce's next question made her heart skip a beat. "So if I were you, I'd make sure you find some very specific evidence regarding Bartowski's involvement. His freedom and maybe even his life, could depend it."

Sarah ended the conversation with Bryce soon after, reassuring him she'd find what they needed to incriminate Roark and spare Chuck from suffering any of the consequences. Her tone was confident enough to convince Bryce that she knew what she was doing, but truthfully, Sarah had never felt more lost.

 **Malibu, CA: 1300 Hours**

Everyone gathered underneath the umbrellas around noon to share the picnic lunch that Ellie had packed for them. Afterwards they split up into pairs; Ellie and Devon spread out on their beach towels to relax, Morgan and Anna started building lopsided sandcastles, and Sarah suggested to Chuck that they get started with the surfing lesson. Chuck was excited at first, that was until Sarah instructed him to set his board down on the sand and lay on top of it. He grew even more discontent when she spent the next twenty minutes lecturing him on the proper techniques he needed to keep in mind when he was out on the water. When she was finished, she had him practice his swim strokes while still lying atop the board.

"I feel like an idiot."

"This is how everyone learns, Chuck. Now paddle."

Chuck heaved a sigh, stroking his arms through the air while Sarah knelt on the sand in front of him, studying his form.

"Good?"

"Good enough," she teased, pushing him back down when he tried to stand. "Stay there. Now you're going to practice 'popping'."

"How long until we actually throw water into the equation?" Chuck moaned, dropping his chin onto the board beneath him.

"However long it takes us."

"That's not an answer."

"Shut up and stand up the way I showed you."

Chuck braced his hands on the board's slick surface and pushed himself up, chest first. In one quick motion, Chuck tucked his feet underneath his torso and popped into a low crouch, rising slowly and extending his arms, pretending to lose his balance a little as if he were really riding a wave. Sarah walked around him, her eyes sliding slowly over his entire body. Chuck watched her, his head swiveling to follow her as she strolled around him. Their gazes met for a brief moment, and Sarah saw a tiny shiver pass through Chuck's limbs. She stopped in front of him and knelt down, nudging his feet closer together and then stood back with her arms crossed, admiring her handiwork.

"You look good." Only after the words left her mouth did Sarah realize how they might sound to Chuck. He managed to thank her, but his smile was clearly forced and there was definitely a coloring to his cheeks that hadn't been there before. "Alright, strap on your leash and let's head out to the water."

"I really have to wear this thing?" Chuck asked, latching the line that trailed from the end of his board to his ankle.

"Trust me, you'll want it once we get out there," Sarah said, grabbing her board and gesturing for Chuck to follow. They waded into the cold water together and Chuck followed Sarah's lead once they were deep enough to lay on top of their boards. The water jerked and rolled underneath him, but he continued to paddle the way they'd practiced on land, looking far less crazy now that his movements actually cut through the water. Sarah didn't take him out very far. Instead she stopped where the waves crested just high enough to carry them back to shore. At that point she helped Chuck turn his board around and told him to wait.

"Now what?" Chuck asked. His mouth was little more than a thin line, his brows drawn low over wide eyes. Sarah knew she should be focused on calming him, and yet she couldn't help but notice how cute Chuck looked when he was nervous.

"Just do exactly what you did on land. And don't worry if you fall. It's going to happen, I promise. But that's how you learn."

"It's like a metaphor," Chuck offered. "Fall down seven times, get back up eight?"

"More like, fall down fifty times, get back up fifty one, but yes, you get the idea." Sarah smiled encouragingly. "The most important thing to remember is this: Don't freak out."

"Okay," Chuck gulped, already failing to follow through on that count. Sarah swiveled on her board, watching the waves come closer.

"Get ready, Chuck," she said, and then without further preamble, or even time to get ready, she shouted. "Paddle!"

Chuck threw his arms into motion, feeling the wave pick his board up and surge towards the shore. Somehow, past the deafening crash of the waves he heard Sarah calling, "Pop up, Chuck! Pop up!"

Bracing his hands on the wet board, Chuck tucked his feet underneath his torso, wobbling and sliding, then rising into a hunched over stance for a good second or two before the wave tossed him overboard and the water closed over Chuck's head. Sarah saw his board stop short as the leash on Chuck's ankle stretched taut. Then a moment later, he broke through the water with a gasp, shaking his head to clear the salt water from his eyes and glancing towards the shoreline, where he saw Ellie, Devon, Morgan and Anna cheering and whooping for him. He raised his fist, shouting excitedly and then turned back to look at Sarah, who was too far away to offer verbal encouragement, so instead she raised both hands and gave him two thumbs up. Dropping her arms back to the board, Sarah paddled towards him, catching the next wave and popping up far more gracefully than he had. She rode the wave until she was right beside him and then leapt off of her board into the ocean. She emerged from the water a second later, pushing her wet hair out of her face and grinning. "That was great, Chuck!"

"A whole three second crouch was great?"

"You got up on the board," she said. "That counts for something."

"Can we go again?" he asked excitedly, looking back out at the waves that were coming in more quickly now. Sarah laughed and nodded, helping him back onto his board and paddling out beside him to repeat the process all over again. After a few more tries, and subsequent falls, Sarah offered to take the next wave in first so that Chuck could watch her form. She rode the small wave until she was only a few yards away from shore before jumping into the water again. Breaching the surface, she flung one arm over her board to stay afloat while she watched Chuck attempt to copy her. His attempt wasn't too bad, but he still struggled to stand on his board without sliding every which way. The wave surged underneath him just as Chuck got his footing and he tumbled overboard, diving headfirst into the water, his board going the opposite direction and following the wave into the air. His board settled back on the waves, drifting towards her slowly and it was then that Sarah saw Chuck's leash trailing on top of the water, clearly not attached to Chuck's foot. A flash of fear constricted Sarah's chest as she waited for Chuck to reemerge from underneath the waves, but it quickly became clear to her that something might have happened to him and that was when Sarah leapt into action.

She pulled herself onto her board and began paddling out towards the spot she'd last seen Chuck as quickly as she could. As she was scanning the water for him, she saw his head break the surface momentarily, long enough for him to take a quick breath, before he disappeared under the surface again. It only took her a few seconds to reach the spot where he'd slipped back beneath the water and, taking a quick gulp of air, she dove in after him. The water was dark, even this close to shore, and the salt stung her eyes but she managed to keep them open long enough to spot Chuck swimming desperately for the surface, but getting nowhere.

 _An undercurrent_. Surfing as often as she did, Sarah had struggled enough times with dangerous undercurrents to know that the key to escaping was to remain calm. Chuck was obviously not quite so experienced. He continued to flail against the current and his struggle only seemed to pull him in deeper. Sarah reached out, grabbing Chuck's upper arms and tugging to gain his attention. She pulled him sideways, parallel to the shoreline, kicking hard to steer them both out of the hidden current. Once Sarah felt the pull lessen significantly, she switched direction, pushing Chuck up towards the surface, making sure he was the first to breach the surface before she came up next to him.

He latched onto her board, coughing violently, his chest heaving for air. Sarah pulled herself up in front of him, latching tightly onto one of his forearms with one hand and cupping his face with the other, bringing his gaze to hers.

"You okay?" she panted, searching Chuck's red rimmed eyes while he nodded silently.

He struggled for a moment to regulate his breathing and then choked out, "You saved me." His voice was full of awe, and his eyes were beginning to water, although Sarah thought that might just be an effect of the saltwater. Sarah chuckled breathily and leaned forward until her forehead was touching his, her hand still gently caressing his cheek. For the moment, she wasn't worried about what the close contact meant to Chuck. She'd been petrified that she wouldn't be able to find him under the waves; she'd experienced a raw fear that she hadn't felt in years. Chuck was the first one to pull back. He looked over his shoulder at the rest of the group on shore who were waving at them, shouting worriedly.

"Ellie's never gonna let you hear the end of this," Chuck warned Sarah, giving her a dazed smile. "That's twice you've saved me now."

"Let's hope there won't have to be a third," Sarah replied. She appreciated his sentiment, even if she still disagreed that digging him out of the sand all those months ago qualified as 'saving his life'. Together, they paddled back to shore, where Chuck was immediately swarmed by Ellie and Devon, Ellie mostly, who simultaneously berated him for being an idiot and hugged him tightly with tears in her eyes. Just as Chuck had warned her, Sarah was next in line for the Ellie treatment, receiving a hug that nearly squeezed the air from her lungs.

In spite of a bit of anxiety on Chuck's part and multiple warnings from Ellie, Sarah was determined that they not end the surfing lesson on a sour note. So, after a brief respite on the beach, Sarah led him back out into the water, this time making sure she rode every wave in with him. Just in case.

The two of them continued to surf for a few more hours before the cold and lack of sunlight brought them back to shore, where the others had constructed a small campfire. Sarah had been right about falling down fifty times, but by the end of the day, Chuck had managed a full stance once and ridden that wave almost all the way to shore. Sarah seemed perfectly pleased with his progress as well, and that was all that mattered to Chuck anyway. The air hit him like a bucket of ice water as they made their way to the campfire, sending a powerful shiver through Chuck's entire body. Sarah noticed and reached into her bag when they reached the group, handing Chuck a fluffy, pink towel. He took it gratefully, wrapping it around his shoulders to shield his naked torso from the night air.

"Pink is your color," Sarah said, throwing him a sidelong glance. And suddenly Chuck remembered those words coming from her lips when she'd offered him the same pink towel six months ago. He grinned unabashedly and pulled the fabric tighter, although he no longer needed it thanks to the way Sarah's words had planted an incredible warmth in his chest. They took a seat next to Morgan and Anna, taking the long sticks with marshmallows on the end that Morgan offered them.

Devon offered to tell a few ghost stories, but Sarah quickly found herself more enthralled with watching Chuck try to get his blackened marshmallow of the end of the stick without burning his fingers. He was not successful and ended up dropping the marshmallow in the sand and sucking on his injured fingertips instead. Sarah couldn't hide her giggle, and when Chuck realized that she witnessed the ordeal, he waggled his eyebrows at her playfully. Sarah rolled her eyes and bumped her shoulder against his, helping him with the next marshmallow before it could also take a nosedive into the sand.

The night wore on and as Devon continued telling stories, while Morgan tried to start up a few campfire songs, but to no avail. Sarah watched the fire crackle and pop, tiny bits of burning driftwood floating into the darkened sky and joining the stars. Before she knew it, she was leaning heavily against Chuck's side, lulled into a state of absolute calm. Chuck didn't hesitate, he slipped an arm around her hip, opening up his shoulder and allowing her to sink further against him. Sarah noticed Ellie was watching them again, but her gaze wasn't critical anymore; it was gentle and a little bit melancholy, she thought. Suddenly, Morgan's voice pulled Sarah back into the present moment.

"Well! I think Anna and I are ready to turn in for the night. Sound good, babe?" Anna got up with Morgan and started to pick up their stuff, Ellie and Devon were quick to follow suit. Sarah had a fleeting thought that it almost seemed choreographed.

"You guys go ahead," Chuck said, wrapping Sarah's pink towel around his shoulders again. "I'm gonna take a late night walk before I head inside."

Devon started to extinguish the fire but Chuck stopped him before he could continue, promising that he'd put it out when he was ready to head back. The others gathered their scattered supplies and trudged towards the house, leaving Chuck and Sarah standing awkwardly by the fire pit. Chuck sighed and stretched, glancing down the stretch of darkened beach.

Chuck's expression was neutral but Sarah could sense something was bothering him; his smile did not reach his eyes. He turned and headed down the beach, his hands tucked into the pockets of his board shorts. Sarah glanced once over her shoulder towards the beach house and the rest of the group, and then hurried down the beach to catch up with Chuck.

She fell into step beside him, smiling when he looked at her bemusedly. "Want some company?"

Chuck smiled, but again, Sarah could see him hiding something. "Sure."

"You know, I used to come to this beach with my dad when I was a little girl." Sarah's confession startled Chuck almost as much as it did her, but she'd managed to convince herself that honesty would be good for the mission. If she told him something about her personal life, then he was bound to do the same. Even if he didn't, Sarah realized that she didn't really care. She'd never trusted anyone the way she trusted Chuck and telling him about her childhood wasn't as terrifying as she thought it might be. It felt good. "He taught me how to surf."

Chuck was silent. He kept his earnest gaze trained on Sarah's face, waiting for her to continue. "I started off a lot like you did."

"You mean you almost drowned in a riptide?" Chuck asked and when Sarah turned to look at him she saw his nose crinkle teasingly.

"Very funny. Even considering that little mishap, you did a great job today, Chuck. Honestly."

"Better than a little girl at least, huh?"

"Just barely." Chuck threw back his head and laughed, the sound of it mingling with the waves crashing lazily against the shore. Sarah didn't hold back her smile. Being with Chuck always made her feel so…free. She didn't have to try to force things with him; they just happened. She wondered if this was what it felt like to be a normal person, not a CIA agent, not an undercover operative. The last time she could ever remember being allowed to really be herself was when she was a child, and even that hadn't lasted long considering how often her father liked to include her in his cons. But before all that, there had been genuine freedom and it started on this beach where her father bought her ice cream and called her 'darlin'.

"Have you seen your dad lately?" Chuck's voice drew Sarah out of her thoughts and back to the moment and his question struck a chord with her.

"No. Not for a long time. My dad isn't what you'd call a 'good guy'."

"Oh." Sarah could see from Chuck's expression that he was bursting with questions, but he said nothing. For that, she was grateful. She was willing to share her experiences on this beach with him, but getting into her complicated relationship with her father might be too much.

"I haven't seen my dad since I was a kid," Chuck continued suddenly. "He left Ellie and me when we were little. After my mom passed away he just…changed. He wasn't the same guy. I don't really blame him for leaving, I guess. But…Well, it was hard on Ellie. She had to take care of me when she was barely more than a kid herself."

"I had no idea," Sarah murmured, wishing she had something more comforting to say, but Chuck just smiled at her.

"It's alright. I turned out okay. We all have our baggage, you know? I try not to let it get me down, I can't exactly change what happened, can I?"

"That's a really," Sarah paused, looking for the right word, "Incredible way to look at it."

"Incredible?" Chuck's brows rose and he pursed his lips. "I don't know about that."

"It is. There are a lot of people who aren't ever able to deal with pain like that, Chuck." _Like myself,_ Sarah thought bitterly. "But you did. And you're stronger for it. _You're_ pretty incredible."

Chuck was positively beaming now. Leaning over, he nudged his shoulder against hers and mumbled, "Thank you." Sarah nudged him back a little harder, giggling when she threw him off balance and he stumbled.

They walked together in silence for a few minutes before Sarah reached for Chuck's hand hesitantly and threaded her fingers through his. She wasn't sure why she was being so bold, the mission certainly wasn't on her mind anymore. Chuck seemed to be asking the same question considering the way he looked at her. But he didn't resist; in fact he squeezed her hand gently as they walked, running his thumb over hers every now and then. The gesture was small, almost inconsequential, but Sarah felt like someone had released an entire swarm of butterflies in her stomach. They continued walking this way for a while, eventually turning around and heading back towards the beach house.

"Can I ask you something, Sarah?" Chuck asked suddenly, shattering the silence around them.

"Of course."

"Why did you come with us?" Chuck didn't stop moving, he didn't look at her either, he kept his gaze on the dark sand before them, but the question was so unexpected that Sarah wasn't sure how to answer at first.

"I…wanted to spend more time with you," She answered quietly. "And your family."

They'd made their way back to the fire pit by now and Sarah saw Chuck's brow furrow in the light from the flames. Chuck stared at the fire, his expression growing dark. "But what about Bryce?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean he's your boyfriend," Chuck shrugged. "I mean you should be here with him, not me. You should be teaching him how to surf and how not to burn his marshmallows. You should be playing Frisbee with him and holding _his_ hand. I just…." Sarah was frozen in place now. For the first time in her life, she had lost control of the situation. She didn't know what she could say to make Chuck feel better. Her relationship with Bryce was a lie, but telling him that would put the entire mission in jeopardy. For once she didn't have an answer for Chuck. She was paralyzed.

Slowly, Chuck pulled his hand from hers and turned away from her so that he was facing the open ocean. She had to strain to hear him when he continued. "I know that the two of you are struggling. And I don't really understand why. But I can't be the guy that ruins what you have. I won't do that to you. Or to him. That's just not who I am, Sarah….regardless of how I feel about you."

"Chuck," Sarah tried to find the words she needed, but all she had was his name. She couldn't even begin to understand what to say or how to make this situation better. Her mission objectives and her personal feelings had never been more at odds than they were right now. As she stood there, at a complete loss as to what to do or say, the distance between then began to stretch like a gaping canyon.

"Six months ago, you changed my whole world, Sarah Walker. You came out of nowhere and flipped everything upside down. That one day with you gave me clarity. It made me feel like I had a chance to figure out what I was supposed to do with my life. I'm so grateful to you for that. And now it's happening again, but it's too…It's not…."

Chuck took a quivering breath and only then did Sarah realize that his entire body was shaking. "If you think that we have a shot at something more than this…something meaningful, then I'll leave the door open for you, Sarah. But right now, everything is so confusing and I don't know if I'm misunderstanding the signs."

"Chuck," Sarah breathed, taking a step closer so she was standing directly behind him, putting her left hand on his right shoulder. "You're not 'misunderstanding' anything.

"I'm not?" He turned slightly, his eyes widened considerably. "Then, can you tell me what's going on? Please? Because I...I just don't understand. I mean, I won't pretend that I know everything about you, Sarah, but the person I think you are would not cheat on her boyfriend." There, he finally said it out loud. The one thought that had dominated his thoughts more than any other over the last few days.

Sarah met his gaze, wishing for all the world that she could tell him everything, assure him that she was not lying to hurt him but to protect him. But she couldn't. Chuck saw the indecision on her face and chuckled softly, ducking his chin to his chest to avoid her eyes and stepping away from her again. "So, that's it then? Alright. I get it."

He turned to walk away from her, back towards the beach house, but Sarah couldn't let this moment go without giving him something real. She would never forgive herself if she didn't. Reaching out, she grabbed Chuck's wrist, spinning him around and pulling him towards her. The momentum was perfect. Chuck's lips found hers in the darkness and she held him to her, hungrily, lacing one hand through his short curls and tugging on them lightly. She'd found a sensitive spot apparently, because Chuck moaned softly and wrapped himself around her, his tongue pressing against her lips, begging for a connection with hers.

Sarah complied, succumbing almost too easily to the moment and to Chuck. He tasted like saltwater and sugar, and even a little bit like smoke from the campfire. The wind whipped around them and suddenly Sarah felt herself falling, but she didn't care because Chuck had a tight hold on her, his large hands keeping her safe as they tumbled. And then Sarah felt the sand against her back and Chuck's hands in her hair and she tugged the pink towel away from his neck, and ran her hands down his bare, well-muscled back, her nails scraping along the sensitive skin, making him shudder. Chuck's lips left hers suddenly and traveled across her jaw instead, then down the inside of her throat, finally resting against her collar bone. Sarah felt one of his warm hands slip underneath the light shirt she wore, his long fingers stroking the skin over her hip. This is what she'd wanted all week. No, before that. For months. The months since she'd met him on the beach and he made her laugh and feel like she had a home. And it seemed so simple now, she couldn't understand why she'd fought against the feeling for so long when there was nothing in the world but them. No mission, no CIA, no Bryce….Bryce. His voice sounded in her ears as if he were right beside them, warning her that she was pushing it too far, promising her that she would ruin the mission if she continued. _Sarah, you need to make sure you complete the mission. Chuck's nothing but a mark. You need to complete the mission by any means necessary. You need to get Chuck to trust you._ Reality struck Sarah like a sledgehammer. She jolted back to her senses and Chuck's kisses felt less like heaven and more like fire scorching her skin. She braced her hands against his chest and pushed him backwards hard, causing Chuck to fall to the sand next to her. He blinked at her, his hair a wild mess and confusion written all over his face.

Sarah struggled to her feet, crossing her arms around her waist and doing all she could to regain her composure, but her voice shook like a leaf when she spoke, "We shouldn't have…Um…We should head back to the house."

Chuck looked up at her, and his expression made it clear how absolutely crushed he was. He rose slowly and reached out to touch her shoulder. "Sarah, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for that to….I…." It was clear that Chuck didn't have anything more to say, but Sarah was no better. She'd completely ruined the tenuous relationship she had built with Chuck, and in turn with his family, in a little under five minutes.

"Let's go, Chuck." She didn't mean for her words to sound so icy, but they did, and Chuck seemed to shrink into himself as she spoke. Turning away so that he couldn't see the tears pricking the corners of her eyes, Sarah hurried back down the beach towards the beach house, not bothering to check whether Chuck was following.

Chuck stood frozen in place, feeling as if his entire world has just shattered. He knew he shouldn't have pushed her, but he did anyway. He knew he shouldn't have questioned what she had with Bryce, but he couldn't wait any longer. His impatience had ruined what little he did have with Sarah. If it was anything to begin with, that is. Chuck sat back down in front of the fire, drawing his knees up to his chest and hugging his arms around them. It didn't make any sense. If anything, he was more confused that he'd been before. When she remained silent after he asked for an explanation, he was prepared to walk away, but she'd pulled him back. And kissed him. Wow had she kissed him.

But that was what confused Chuck more than anything. If Sarah really had a reason to leave Bryce, then why couldn't she just tell him? Why would she kiss him and then push him away? And suddenly Chuck wasn't sad anymore, he was frustrated. Angry, even. He was being toyed with by a woman who didn't appear to have any idea what, or who, she wanted. Ellie and Morgan had been so excited by the idea that Sarah might be interested in him that Chuck had allowed himself to believe as well, making the reality all the more crushing. He couldn't do this anymore. No matter how badly he wanted to understand. The Chuck that Sarah had met on the beach six months ago, would have sulked, cried and cursed his own stupidity. But he'd grown in the time since the day he met her. In fact, she'd been the one to tell him that he needed to fight for what he wanted, to stand up for himself and believe that he was worth something. Whatever was going on with Sarah and Bryce, Chuck decided he needed to remove himself from the situation until it was resolved. He didn't deserve to have his heart played with like this.

Chuck stayed on the beach until the fire burned out on its own, and his whirling thoughts died out with it. A gust of cold night air buffeted him, blowing Sarah's pink towel off of his shoulders and into the sand. Taking that as his cue to return to the house, Chuck grabbed the towel in one hand, threw sand on any remains of the fire to make sure it was out, and plodded back up the beach. The lights in the house were off and the living room was dead silent when Chuck entered. Everyone had gone to bed hours ago, or so he hoped. He didn't want to deal with any of his friends and family at the moment, or Sarah for that matter. Unfortunately, he was not so lucky. As he went to set her towel next to her beach bag, she sat up from underneath the pile of blankets on the couch and her wide-eyed stare told Chuck that she hadn't slept a wink since returning to the house without him.

"I wasn't sure you'd come back," she murmured, keeping her voice low to avoid waking anyone.

"Couldn't sleep on the beach all night with just this," he said coolly, holding up her towel before dropping it onto her bag. "I'll just grab some blankets and find somewhere else to sleep tonight."

"Chuck," Sarah said softly, watching him gather up his nest of blankets from the floor. "We should talk about what just-"

"There's nothing left to say," Chuck interrupted, turning on her with a surprising intensity in his eyes. "I told you everything I needed to on the beach, Sarah. And the…whatever you want to call what just happened on the beach, didn't change that. In fact," Chuck paused, setting down his blankets on an armchair and grabbing the t-shirt he'd left there the night before instead. "If anything, it makes what I said that much more important."

Chuck pulled the t-shirt over his head, granting Sarah a momentary respite from his penetrating gaze. "I can't do this with you anymore. I _won't_ do this anymore. You need to figure out what it is that you want from me…or from Bryce, and commit to it."

Sarah gaped at Chuck, unable to find the words for a response. The last thing she'd expected to see from him after the confusion on the beach, was vehemence.

"You're the one who told me that I'm worth something, Sarah. That I don't have to play puppet to people who think they can use me. I spent five years mourning a girl that took my heart straight out of my chest and stepped all over it without an explanation. I won't let that happen again." Then, in not much more than a whisper, he said, "I won't let you do that to me."

Chuck picked up his pile of blankets again, his mouth set in a grim line. Sarah sat there, unable to do or say anything, confused by the notion that the more Chuck stood up for himself, the more she felt attracted to him. How could that make any sense? Moving towards the front door, Chuck looked back over his shoulder at her and finally, Sarah saw that his eyes were brimming and glassy. "I care about you, Sarah….A lot. More than I can really say right now. But I think it's best if we spend some time apart. Until you figure things out."

Without waiting for her response, Chuck stepped out the door, shutting it quietly behind him and leaving Sarah alone in the darkened living room. She'd screwed up. Badly. Not only had she ruined whatever relationship she'd built with Chuck, but she'd simultaneously destroyed their chances at getting the information they needed regarding Roark.

Bryce wasn't going to be happy, and Sarah wasn't exactly proud of herself either. She'd never fumbled a mission this badly. But, then again, she'd never met someone like Chuck Bartowski either. She'd been doomed from the start.

His powerful words still rang in her ears. Chuck had grown up. He was far more confident and put together than she was. Whatever vestiges of control she thought she had over the situation flew out the window the moment he compared her to the woman who'd broken him in college. Leaning back against the couch, Sarah squeezed her eyes shut and fought to control the tears that threatened to fall. She had no idea how to correct the situation, professionally or personally. One thing was clear though. She needed to leave the beach house as soon as she could. Tomorrow morning she would call a cab and head back to Burbank. If Chuck needed space, then she would give it to him…no matter how painful it might be. Focusing on her decision, Sarah tried to push everything else out of her mind. But the guilt hounded her long into the night and when Sarah finally did find sleep, it was only after she gave into the emotions tearing her apart, letting silent tears drip down her cheeks and wet the blankets beneath her.

 **o-o-o-o**

* * *

 _And now for some replies to reviews:_ _Thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who leaves thoughts and few had some specific questions or mentioned some things that I wanted to quickly clear up or discuss._

 **tut1971:** You mentioned that Bryce felt a bit stiff and OOC and while I absolutely understand where you're coming from, there wasn't much I could do to make him like canon Bryce considering I cut out his backstory with both Chuck and Sarah. Now, honestly, I could have gone down the route most authors take, which is to make him a horny douchbag, but I wanted to blend his character with Daniel Shaw a little more for this AU. I needed a character entirely focused on the mission and having Bryce be completely suave, playboy Bryce would not have worked quite as well. So don't think of him as Bryce Larkin think of him as...Danielyce Shawkin. But I appreciate what you mean and I agree, he is OOC from canon Bryce. Hopefully he won't impede on your enjoyment of the story too much. Thank you for taking the time to read and review, it's always a pleasure to hear from you!

 **Rob M:** I am so glad to hear that you feel the same way about Sarah's past as I do. Not that anyone's opinion or ideas of her backstory are wrong. Canon did very little with it, so the many fan interpretations are all equally valid. But I've always thought that at her core, Sarah has an enormous heart. I don't think she was ever a truly unfeeling or evil person. I'm sure she tried to convince herself that she was. But we see how guilt ridden and upset she is with herself once Chuck gets her to open up about those things. I like what you said about her being a good person whose job required her to do bad things. You said it perfectly there. And it's been interesting to play with that idea for this story. I am glad you are enjoying the small twists on the cover and I can't thank you enough for the awesome reviews you leave. But I'll try, Thank you!

 **sevenrez:** I would love to tell everyone my plans for Casey but I don't want to give everything away right now so I will say this. Casey will play an important role regarding Chuck's (involuntary) involvement with the spy world. But it probably won't be in the way you might think...Wooo, mysterious. :) Thank you for reviewing!

 **fezzywhigg:** You caught a whole bunch of details in the first three chapters and hopefully what I said to sevenrez gives you an idea of what Casey's role will be. Bryce as a sort of PLI is definitely a part of the plan, every story needs a little bit of drama. But I don't intend to make it too ..er..too big of a deal, I suppose? I'm sure it's clear after this chapter that Sarah's mind is on Chuck. Bryce can be as flirtatious and conniving as he wants. It's not going to get him anywhere. :) He's a tool.

 _Thanks you again everyone, I do hope you enjoyed the update and I will see you next time._


	5. Chapter 5

_Hello everyone! Wow I feel like it's been ages. Life got in the way of this update but I promise you it's still very much alive. I hope the length of this update makes up for the wait and I want to thank everyone that send me PMs regarding it's status. You have all been very patient and supportive, I appreciate it. I also wanted to throw a quick shout out to **wilf21** , your review of the previous chapter sparked a conversation between michaelfmx and I that changed the direction of this story a little bit. Thank you for your thoughts in that regard. Speaking of **michaelfmx** , my sincerest thanks to him for being such a dedicated and awesome beta._

 _Before we begin I wanted to warn you all that we are hitting the angst ceiling with this chapter and the next. But I will promise you this: As long as I write for Chuck, I will never give Chuck and Sarah anything but a happy ending. It's going to be sticky, saccharin, sweetness, but we have to get through the rough patches first. So strap in!_

 _With that said, enjoy!_

* * *

 **February 10** **th** **, Malibu CA: 0530 hours**

Sarah hardly slept that night. The more she thought about what had happened on the beach, the more she realized how badly she'd screwed up. She didn't know where Chuck had spent the night, but after he walked out the door, hefting his pile of blankets, he hadn't returned. By the time morning broke, Sarah was more agitated and fitful than she'd been the night before. Out of all the muddled thoughts running through her head, only one thing was clear. She needed to cut ties with Chuck Bartowski for good, before she did irreparable damage to him. Throwing her blankets off, Sarah rose from the couch and set about gathering her things, tossing them carelessly into her bag.

Before her emotions could get the better of her and she made a decision that could ruin her career, Sarah pulled out her cell phone and called a nearby taxi service to get her back to Burbank. She was not willing to spend another day dancing around Chuck, especially not after what had happened between them last night. Sarah had compromised herself and, in turn, compromised the success of their mission; and she was furious. Never before had she let someone get under her skin like this. Trying to manipulate Chuck hadn't gotten her any closer to Roark. It had only served to confuse her and make things far more complicated than they needed to be. Sarah wasn't good with people. She wasn't good with words. But she was good at walking away. She was good at being a spy. Removing herself from Chuck's life, and consequently his family's, was the only way she could think of to rectify the situation. There would be another way to take down Roark. There had to be; there was always a plan B. Or at least, that's what Sarah was fighting to convince herself while she packed her things.

Chuck would be far better off without her anyway. He deserved more than what she could give him.

Sarah's phone buzzed in her pants pocket, alerting her that the cab had arrived outside the beach house. But before Sarah could make her escape, Ellie shuffled into the living room. Her hair was a wild mess and she was still rubbing sleep from her eyes, but when she caught sight of Sarah with her bag in one hand and her cell phone in the other, she snapped to attention.

"Sarah? What are you doing?"

 _Damn it._ "I…I just got a call from Bryce. I'm sorry, Ellie, I didn't want to wake anyone. But, I need to get back to Burbank."

"A call?" Ellie's eyes narrowed. "Is Bryce okay?"

"Yes, everything's fine. I just…There are some personal things I need to take care of and they can't wait another day." Sarah knew that her cover was flimsy, but Ellie had caught her off guard and she hadn't thought of what she would say if anyone cornered her before she could escape. It was a stupid oversight, Sarah realized a little too late. "I'm sorry. But the trip was amazing. I really enjoyed myself, Ellie. Thank you for bringing me along. We'll have to catch up back in Burbank. Maybe I'll take you up on that shopping trip you mentioned?"

Sarah had no intention of following through on any sort of frivolous shopping trip, but the barrage of words was working. Ellie appeared too overwhelmed and confused to try and stop Sarah from leaving. Offering the older woman one last friendly smile, Sarah reached for the doorknob only to grope through thin air instead. Looking down at her hand, Sarah realized that the door was already open. Chuck stood on the other side of the doorway, barring her way, his own hand still on the knob. Sarah met his gaze and in it she could see all the questions he still had for her, the ones she hadn't been able to answer last night. The ones that she probably never could. Sarah allowed herself one more moment of carelessness; trying to memorize what it felt like to look into Chuck's vibrant brown eyes. And then she looked away, the mask of an emotionless spy that she was so used to wearing taking over her expression. That was all the answer Chuck needed. He stepped aside for her without a word, allowing Sarah to stride past him just as quietly.

Sarah didn't know if Chuck watched her go, she never looked back to check. With every step she forced herself to let go of the people she'd become so comfortable with. Sarah was good at walking away; she always had been. That's what she repeated over and over like some sort of demented mantra so that she could continue walking with her head held high and not crumble into a million tiny pieces like she so desperately wanted to. She opened the door of the cab, threw her bags inside and slid in beside them. She gave the cab driver the address of the Maison23 apartments and he took off down the road. And even while the house shrunk away in the distance, Sarah felt as if her heart was growing heavier and heavier. In spite of her best efforts to distance herself physically and emotionally, she was still tethered to something there. Someone. Sarah didn't realize the tears slipping down her cheeks until the cabby peered at her through the rearview window and asked, "Everything alright, miss?"

Sarah quickly brushed the wetness from her cheeks and nodded, schooling her features and pulling out her phone, pretending to study what was on the screen in hopes of discourage the cabby from asking her any more questions. Bryce had called again, but she would wait to update him until she made it to the apartment. And in the meantime she could work on burying the pain and confusion that roiled within her.

Chuck watched the cab speed down the road until it became little more than a tiny speck on the horizon. As soon as it was gone, he turned back into the beach house, stepping wordlessly past Ellie who still stood in the living room gaping at him. Chuck didn't want to deal with her inevitable interrogation right now, not when he felt like a gaping hole had opened in chest. He traipsed into the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of cereal, taking a seat at the dining table and focusing intently on chewing his corn flakes as thoroughly as possible. When Ellie couldn't take the silence any longer, she slammed her hands down on the table so suddenly that Chuck nearly spilled his cereal onto his lap.

"What the hell happened, Chuck?" Ellie shouted, disregarding the fact that there were three other people in the house sleeping soundly, or at least trying to.

"Ellie, not right now," Chuck groaned.

"Yes, right now. Chuck, what happened between you two?" Ellie's large hazel eyes were wider than normal and her mouth had twisted into a grimace.

"Nothing happened," Chuck dodged, turning his gaze away from Ellie and back to his cereal.

"Chuck, Sarah just walked out the door without so much as a goodbye! She's taking a cab back to Burbank instead of driving with us. She hardly even looked at you before she left. What did you do to her?"

"What did _I_ do to _her_?" Chuck balked, allowing a hint of anger to color his voice. He quickly lowered it again, realizing that if he started a shouting match with Ellie, they were bound to wake the whole house. "Ellie, I didn't do anything to Sarah. It was her choice to leave. She has Bryce, remember?"

"But what about yesterday?" Ellie's frown deepened as she tried to put the pieces together. "What about last night? Chuck, I know you two didn't come back from the beach until much later."

Chuck sighed, clenching his fists on either side of the bowl now filled with soggy cereal. Taking a deep breath through his nose he said, "She kissed me." Ellie's eyebrows jumped but Chuck plowed on before she could interrupt. "I asked her why she came with us. I asked her if she had feelings for me or for Bryce and she didn't have an answer."

"So she kissed you?"

"Yeah." Chuck gave Ellie a tight smile. "Believe me, I'm just as confused as you are." Chuck stood, taking his cereal and dumping it in the kitchen sink. He wasn't hungry anymore; in fact, the heaviness filling his gut was making him a little queasy.

"I don't understand," Ellie said, following him into the kitchen and leaning against the countertop. "You have to go after her Chuck. You have to get answers. Maybe she's scared of her real feelings. Maybe Bryce has her trapped in some kind of twisted relationship."

"Ellie, stop."

"Chuck, I'm just saying-"

"It's over, Ellie," Chuck said quietly, keeping his tone even to ensure that his sister didn't think he was angry with her. "Actually, I guess I should say that it was never anything to begin with. I mourned Jill for almost five years. I let myself pine over a woman that didn't care about my feelings. I won't do that again."

Ellie's shoulders slumped; she knew Chuck was repeating the advice she'd given him a few days ago before they'd arrived at the beach house. But Ellie had given him that advice _before_ she'd seen his interactions with Sarah. It wasn't just another Jill incident. It couldn't be. How could she be so wrong about what she saw? Something just didn't make sense.

"Sarah and I are never going to be anything more than we are right now, El," Chuck said softly, drawing his sister out of her thoughts. "And I'm okay with that. I need you to be too."

Ellie nodded and smiled gently at her little brother, pulling him into a brief but comforting hug. Chuck patted her back and then stepped away, holding her at arm's length and grinning. "We've got one more day to enjoy the beach, so let's not waste it talking about this, okay?"

Ellie watched Chuck walk away to grab his beach things, catching the way his brilliant smile faded the moment he thought she couldn't see his face.

 _Oh, Chuck._

As soon as her brother disappeared down the hallway towards the bathroom, taking his beach things with him, Ellie wandered into the living room again, crossing her arms over her chest and frowning down at the couch where Sarah had spent the night. It was then that Ellie noticed a bright, pink something bunched up against one of the couch cushions and, once she picked it up and held it out at arms-length, her mouth fell open with a soft 'oh'. She held the pink towel that Sarah had given Chuck the previous night and while it was entirely possible that Sarah had simply forgotten it, Ellie wanted nothing more than to believe that it was left as a sort of peace offering for her brother. Folding the towel, Ellie tucked it underneath her arm and slowly made her way back to her own room. She'd keep the towel for now, until she could figure out Sarah Walker's true intentions.

 **o-o-o-o**

"I just don't get it, Devon," Ellie said as she watched Chuck struggling to ride his surfboard back to shore. He wasn't doing well without Sarah there to guide him. Not that he'd been that great the day before either, but it was easy to see that his heart wasn't in it anymore.

"I'm not sure there's anything to get, babe," Devon replied, propping himself on his elbows and pushing his sunglasses back on his head. "Sarah's got a boyfriend. Maybe she really did just come along as Chuck's friend."

"No, she didn't," Ellie insisted, tearing her gaze away from Chuck and focusing instead on her lounging husband. "There is no way that's true. Come on, Devon, you saw the same things I did! When they crashed during the Frisbee game? The surfing lessons? Last night around the campfire? There was total chemistry between them."

Devon shrugged, looking a little afraid of his exuberant wife. "Yeah sure….I guess."

"Ellie's right," Anna agreed from where she lay sunbathing on her own beach towel. "She's totally into him."

"Who's into who?" Morgan asked, abandoning his half eaten bag of chips and joining the conversation instead.

"Sarah's into Chuck," Anna reiterated.

"Oh yeah, obviously."

"See?" Ellie cried, swatting Devon's shoulder lightly.

"Then why did she leave?" he asked, flinching away from Ellie's attack.

"That's what I can't figure out…"

"Poor guy," Morgan muttered, watching his friend topple headfirst into the waves for the tenth time in a row. "It's like Jill all over again."

"It's not Jill all over again... is it?" Ellie asked.

Morgan shrugged noncommittally. "Instant connection, subsequent heartbreak without explanation, and a mopey Chuck. Seems pretty 'Jill' to me."

Ellie sighed, her gaze flitting back to the shore where Chuck had finally given up trying to surf and now sat in the sand on his own, the board abandoned nearby. "I need to talk to Sarah."

"You really think that's a good idea?" Devon asked quietly. "Maybe it would be better to leave her alone and move on."

Ellie chewed on her lip thoughtfully. Devon had a point; talking to Sarah might just frustrate her further if she didn't get the answers she needed. Maybe it would be better for her brother to move on as quickly as possible. Maybe answers weren't necessary this time. But something still felt off. Sarah's sudden disinterest didn't add up with what Ellie had seen between her and Chuck over the last couple of days.

"I just don't get it…"

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah paused just outside the door to her room in Maison23. Bryce was in there, waiting to hear about her weekend with the Bartowsis and she had nothing to show for it. She wasn't looking forward to the inevitable interrogation Bryce was going to put her through, but she had no other choice. Steeling herself for Bryce's inescapable questions, she pushed the door open and stepped inside. Bryce sat at the vanity where they'd set up a makeshift surveillance station with a few low quality monitors. Sarah had no idea how he'd managed to pull it off, but Bryce had hacked a few of the security feeds at Roark Instruments earlier in the week and was currently using them to monitor activity within the building whenever he could. He hadn't gotten much useful information though, and Sarah doubted he ever would. If Roark was conducting any sort of shady business, it obviously wasn't going to go down in broad daylight. What they really needed was a way to plant a bug inside Ted Roark's office, or hack into his phone lines, or his personal computer. Watching him sit in his office all day, or wander through the building was getting them nowhere. Then again, Sarah had to admit that Bryce had probably made more substantial progress than she had.

He looked up when she came in, his brows rising expectantly as he waited for her to relay the results of her mission. Sarah took her time, setting her bag down on the bed and taking care to put her sandals near the front door before finally turning to face Bryce.

"You're back early," Bryce began. "How did it go?"

Deciding to rip the proverbial band aid off in one fell swoop, Sarah said, "We can't use Chuck. We need a new plan."

Bryce blinked, obviously taken aback by the suddenness and finality of her statement. "What do you mean we can't use Chuck? We have to use Chuck. He's the only way we're going to be able to get into Roark Instruments."

Sarah crossed her arms over her chest and set her jaw, hoping she looked more confident than she felt at the moment. "We'll find another way. There's always a plan B."

"We don't need a plan B," Bryce replied, rising from his seat at the vanity. "We need Chuck Bartowski. What the hell happened this weekend? All you had to do was get a little information from the guy. Why is this such an issue?"

"It's an issue because of you!" Sarah found herself shouting, releasing all of the confusion and anger and hurt that she'd kept bottled up over the weekend on her stunned partner. "I told you when this started that Chuck wouldn't take well to the couple cover. The closer I tried to get to him the more he drew away."

Bryce's brows drew together. "And that's my fault?"

"Yes, it's your fault. Chuck trusted me, and then you had to play possessive boyfriend and he closed off. If you'd just let me do what I needed to from the beginning, then I'd have the information we needed by now."

"So tell him that we broke up," Bryce retaliated, throwing his arms up in the air. "This doesn't have to be so difficult."

"No," Sarah said firmly, ignoring the way Bryce rolled his eyes. "Chuck is out of the equation. We'll find another way."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Bryce sat back down at the vanity and gazed tiredly at the monitors. He didn't look like he cared to pursue the argument at the moment, but Sarah knew she hadn't escaped a full interrogation just yet. She would need to come up with an excuse to satisfy Bryce's suspicions soon. "So what's your plan B?" Bryce asked, keeping his gaze on the monitors as he spoke.

"I don't know." Sarah's reply was curt. "I'll think of something." Deciding she would be able to think much more clearly after she'd showered and cleaned off the salt from the beach, Sarah rifled through her bag, looking for a towel to use, and that's when she realized that one was missing. The pink one. Chuck's towel. She must have left it at the house in her haste. Not that it mattered much at this point; if Chuck found it he'd probably throw it out. Still, part of her was glad she'd forgotten it. Maybe, if she was lucky, it would be a strange sort of keepsake for him. Grabbing a towel from the nearby bureau instead, Sarah made her way to the bathroom only to be stopped short by the sound of Bryce's voice. "Sarah."

Slowly, she turned, almost afraid of what he might say. "You do realize that if we drop Chuck from the equation, you can't prove that he's innocent of any wrongdoing at RI, right?"

She hadn't realized that. She'd been so eager to cut him out completely, that she didn't quite consider all of the ramifications. Proving Chuck's innocence would be far more challenging now, but after all that had happened at the beach, she was hardly ready to admit that she couldn't cut him out quite yet.

"I do," she replied. Bryce shrugged and turned back to his monitors, leaving Sarah to deal with her shower and the turmoil twisting in her gut. As soon as she shut the bathroom door, Bryce left the vanity and crossed to the window, gazing out at the city below as the wheels in his head began to turn.

When Graham had first given him Sarah's dossier, there was nothing there that suggested she would be so quick to sympathize with a mark. Her record for completing missions efficiently and effectively was nearly flawless; and Bryce didn't think that the fallout from the CAT Squad debacle had any bearing on the current situation with Chuck Bartowski. So what was it about the guy that made a great and resourceful spy like Sarah Walker, hesitate to act? Quite suddenly, Bryce remembered what Chuck had told him when the three of them had eaten lunch together nearly a week ago. Chuck had met Sarah long before the mission had brought them back to Burbank. Perhaps there was some connection they'd made back then that was stopping Sarah from doing her job the way she should.

Bryce frowned at the thought that his partner was incapable of acting like a spy because she had some sort of emotional connection to a scrawny, somewhat awkward, nerd of a man. That didn't sit right with him. Guys like Chuck didn't stand a chance with a woman like Sarah; they existed in two entirely different worlds. But Bryce couldn't think of anything else that would explain Sarah's strange behavior when it came to Chuck Bartowski. Somehow, his cool and collected partner had been emotionally compromised by their mark and now it was Bryce's job to find a way to force the information from Chuck, or fail the mission and have his professional reputation within the CIA suffer.

And Bryce would sooner suffer a dozen bullet wounds than let Chuck Bartowski be the reason he failed a mission.

 **o-o-o-o**

Bryce went back to monitor the security feeds while the sounds of the shower ran in the background. His eyes flickered to the screen displaying the front entrance of RI when an employee stepped through the doors, struggling to heft a large sign behind him. He took a few more minutes to set it up outside the front doors, stepping back every now and again to study his handiwork before adjusting it again. Finally, seemingly satisfied, he clapped his hands and stepped back inside, allowing Bryce a clear view of the words printed atop the sign in bold font: **NextExpo 2009!**

 _That's it_ , Bryce realized, switching from his security monitors to his laptop and typing the same words into his browser. NextExpo was the perfect opportunity to slip into the building unnoticed. It would be full of strange faces, large crowds of people, and presentations that would distract the employees so that he and Sarah could sneak into personal offices.

And then Bryce noticed a small detail he'd missed before. At the top of the NextExpo website, there were three words that caught Bryce's attention: the event was "VIP access only", which meant that, unless he and Sarah could come up with a way to fabricate believable tickets, he'd just run into another brick wall. Blowing out a breath of frustration, Bryce ran his fingers through his hair, struggling to come up with another solution. When Sarah came out of the bathroom a few moments later, he pulled her over, showing her the screen and explaining his plan to use the Expo to gain access to the building.

"The only issue," he said, gesturing to the words at the top of the screen. "Is that it's VIP access only. We'll need badges to get in. I'm not sure there's a way we can make fake ones on such short notice."

Sarah straightened up from where she'd been hovering over Bryce's shoulder and he watched as her thoughtful expression suddenly cleared. Maybe he was imagining things, but Bryce thought her face paled just slightly when she murmured, "We need Chuck."

 **o-o-o-o**

"So let me see if I've got this straight," Langston Graham said from Bryce's laptop screen. He leaned forward, lacing his fingers together and resting his chin atop them. "You're telling me that you want to use a civilian to gain access to RI?"

"That's correct," Bryce said.

"Not only that," Graham continued, giving Bryce a sharp look. "But you want to reveal to this civilian, this _employee_ of RI, that you are both undercover agents."

"Director, if I may?" Both Graham, within the screen, and Bryce, looked up at Sarah who stood just behind the desk chair, her arms folded behind her back. "Chuck Bartowski works for Ted Roark, but he's entirely innocent when it comes to the dealings that man has with Fulcrum. In fact, I believe that most of his employees are unaware of his shadier connections. Chuck has told me that many of the projects Roark assigns his employees are given without any understanding of how it fits with other projects or the company's goals at large. It's entirely possible that they don't know what will come of the technology they create for him."

Graham rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "What exactly do you intend to do with Bartowski once you get what you need from him?"

Sarah blinked and her hesitation made Graham frown. "I'm not sure I know what you mean, sir."

"Agent Walker, I don't know anything about this Chuck Bartowski. What I do know is that he works for Roark. Whether or not he's aware of what Roark is doing behind the scenes is of little importance to me. However, he will be aware of your identities and your positions within the Agency. Do you really believe it's safe to reveal that sort of information to him, and then let him go without interrogation?

"I do," Sarah replied, this time without hesitation. "Chuck won't betray us."

Bryce exchanged glances with Graham who sighed and steepled his fingers again before replying. "At the very least, I would like to conduct a discreet background search on Bartowski before the two of you proceed. If everything comes up clear, then you have my permission to speak freely with him. As soon as we have Roark in custody, however, I would also like to speak with Bartowski. He needs to understand how sensitive the information you share with him is." Bryce nodded immediately, but Sarah looked a little more uncertain.

"I don't think that's necessary, sir. Chuck is entirely trustworthy. He won't let anyone know who we are or what we're doing in Burbank."

"I trust your judgment Agent Walker," Graham said. "But I need to take certain precautions to protect the legitimacy of this agency. If Chuck Bartowski is as innocent and honest as you claim he is, then he should have nothing to worry about when speaking with me. Am I correct to think that, Agent Walker?"

"Yes sir." Sarah dipped her chin affirmatively, as did Bryce when Graham looked to him for the same answer.

"Then do what you must to finish this mission and take Ted Roark into custody. And for God's sake do it quickly," Graham responded, ending the transmission shortly thereafter. As soon as the screen went blank, Bryce and Sarah looked at one another. They hadn't really expected Graham to agree so quickly, but with his permission to reveal their identities to Chuck, the end of the mission was finally in sight and neither of them could be too disappointed about that.

"Alright," Bryce said, rising from his seat. "As soon as the background check clears, we go and find Bartowski."

Sarah shook her head. "Chuck won't be back in Burbank until late this evening. I'll confront him tomorrow. Alone."

Bryce scoffed and crossed his arms. "You're going to talk with him by yourself?"

"Of course I am," Sarah retorted, narrowing her eyes at Bryce. "You really think he'll agree to help us if he sees you?"

"I could put a little pressure on the guy, besides I'm not sure I trust your judgment when it comes to Chuck."

Sarah immediately bristled and took a step towards Bryce. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You know exactly what it means," Bryce replied, his voice lowering but not backing down as Sarah got closer. "You had two days...No, you had a whole week to get answers from the guy, and somehow we're no closer to getting the information we need than when we first got here. You obviously can't, or aren't willing, to do what it takes to complete this mission." Sarah gaped at Bryce, wishing she had some way to argue against his accusations, but he was right. She'd failed at her job, all because she couldn't stand to use Chuck the way she was supposed to. A large part of her kept wondering if that was really such a terrible crime. "I'll be going with you tomorrow. We need to get to Roark and Chuck is our way in. You're out of chances, Sarah."

 **February 11** **th** **, Burbank, CA: 0730 Hours:**

Chuck was fiddling with the Winsor knot in his tie when he heard the knock on his front door. He had exactly thirty minutes to get to work in LA traffic and a visitor at 7:30 in the morning was the last thing he was prepared to accommodate.

"It's open, buddy!" he shouted over his shoulder, hoping that it was just Morgan returning to grab the work badge that he somehow managed to forget every morning. But when the door opened and Morgan did not answer his call, Chuck threw his tie down on the bed and stepped into the living room to see who it was that had let themselves in.

The last person he expected to see in his living room after the catastrophic beach trip was Sarah Walker. But there she was, standing smack in the center of the room, her arms crossed over her chest while Bryce paced near the door. Chuck knew he shouldn't be happy to see her standing there, looking very irate; but his breath still caught in his throat when he caught sight of her, her hair haloed in the soft morning sunlight, her blue eyes more of a stormy grey as they landed on his. Chuck snapped back to reality when he heard the on the door click and then the blinds flickered shut, and suddenly he realized that Sarah and her very agitated boyfriend had just cornered him in his own apartment. Neither of them looked very friendly at the moment either. Chuck took a step back, wondering if he was quick enough to escape through the 'Morgan door' before either of them had a chance to break his legs. But before he could turn tail and run, Sarah spoke, pinning him in place with her angry blue gaze. "Chuck, we need to talk."

Chuck went pale. Bryce was moving towards him now, his eyes practically burning holes into Chuck. He was going to die, in his own living room. Strangled by an angry boyfriend, all because of some impulsive decisions made during a weekend away.

"Okay, uh, sure let's talk. Bryce, good to see you again. You know, you really missed out on a fun beach trip." Chuck began babbling, taking a step backward for every one Bryce took forward. "I mean not that it was too much fun. Just a normal amount of fun. Just friendly fun. Between friends."

Bryce was glowering at him now, but he'd stopped moving forward. He planted his feet and crossed his arms over his chest instead, but Chuck was no less intimidated.

"Look, I don't know what she told you," Chuck said, throwing a quick glance over Bryce's shoulder to where Sarah stood behind him. "But nothing really happened on the beach. Well, okay, that's not entirely true. Something sort of happened. But I was completely out of line, and I want you to know that I am not normally a guy that goes around kissing other guys' girlfriends."

Bryce's brows flew upward and an amused smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He looked over his shoulder at Sarah and murmured, "A kiss?" Sarah's eyes flitted between Bryce and Chuck, her mouth opening and closing, but no words were forthcoming.

"You...didn't know about the kiss?" Chuck asked, realizing he'd just shot himself in the foot by bringing it up.

"Chuck," Sarah interrupted before the situation could continue spiraling out of her control. "That's not what we're here for."

"No, but I'm interested to hear about it now," Bryce teased, his smirk growing as he looked back and forth between Chuck and Sarah.

"It's not important," Sarah assured him, and Chuck flinched at the offhanded way she said it. "Chuck, sit down."

Chuck didn't obey right away, he stood there trying to figure out what exactly was going on, wondering how on Earth he had gotten himself into this situation. This would be an interesting story to tell Morgan someday…if he survived.

"Sit," Sarah commanded again, pointing to the armchair nearest Bryce. Chuck inched forward, skirting around the couch to keep as far away from him as possible before slowly settling into the armchair Sarah had indicated. Only when he was situated did Sarah's body language seem to soften; it was hardly noticeable, but Chuck was so intently focused on her that he didn't miss it. She sat next to him, poised on the very edge of the couch, her eyes locked on his.

"Chuck, I'm about to tell you something very important. Something that can't leave this room, no matter how crazy it sounds, do you understand?"

Chuck frowned, looking from her to Bryce and then back again. "What are you talking about?"

Sarah shook her head. "I need you to promise me that you will keep what we tell you a secret, Chuck."

"How can I promise that if I don't know what you're about to tell me?" Chuck started to get up, but froze and sat back down slowly when he caught the look Sarah gave him.

Bryce stopped pacing and stood looming over the back of Chuck's armchair instead. "You really want to keep making this harder than it has to be, Bartowski?"

Chuck looked over his shoulder, raising an eyebrow at Bryce. "Really? Are you trying to get me with a good cop, bad cop routine?" Realizing he wasn't going to further the conversation by provoking either of them, he added, "Alright, alright. Whatever. I promise."

Bryce opened his mouth to form a scathing response, but Sarah interrupted before either of them could continue arguing. "Chuck, this is about the beach. I'm here to answer your questions."

Chuck's head snapped around so fast he felt like he might have given himself whiplash. Once Sarah realized she had his attention, she continued, "I haven't been entirely honest with you about who I am. Or what I'm doing in Burbank."

Sarah paused, seeming to gather herself before continuing, but all Chuck could do was focus on fighting the sickening waves of apprehension roiling in his belly.

"Do you remember when we first met and I told you that I worked for the Government?" Chuck nodded hesitantly, still not sure where this was going. "I do. But there's more to it than that. I'm an agent, Chuck. A CIA agent."

Chuck heard the words, but they didn't register for what seemed like an eternity. When he finally found his voice, all he managed to sputter was, "What?"

Sarah reached into her pocket and pulled out a black leather case. Inside was a worn, golden badge and an off-white ID card with Sarah's name on the bottom left and a small picture just above it.

"Oh my god," Chuck whispered, unable to tear his eyes away from the ID card. Sarah nodded to Bryce who tossed a similar ID down on the table next to hers.

"Bryce is my partner, not my boyfriend," she continued, allowing Chuck to continue gawking at the cards. "We were sent here, undercover, to investigate your boss. Ted Roark."

"Wait a minute, Bryce isn't your boyfriend?"

Bryce and Sarah both gaped at Chuck, until Bryce broke the awkward silence by groaning and running a frustrated hand through his hair. "I can't believe this guy..."

"No he's not," Sarah replied with more patience than her partner. "Chuck, did you hear what I said? About your boss?"

"Roark?" Chuck, who realized that he'd just made a fool out of himself, finally looked up at her again, a thin line of confusion forming between his brows. "Why is Roark being investigated by the CIA?"

"Because he's a criminal," Bryce sneered, earning a glare from Chuck.

"We have reason to believe that he's been in contact with a terrorist organization called Fulcrum," Sarah said. "Our orders were to find out what we could about Roark's recent business dealings and gather enough solid evidence to warrant taking him into custody."

"I don't understand," Chuck murmured. "What does this have to do with me?"

Sarah paused, her expression growing tight and she looked at Bryce briefly before she responded, as if warning him not to interrupt. "You have a personal connection with Roark. We thought we might be able to get an idea about his most recent transactions if we spoke with you about your job."

Chuck felt like a blade had just been twisted into his gut. A sharp, burning sensation bloomed in the middle of his chest, traveling upward and constricting his throat until he felt like he couldn't breathe. "You used me?" he asked, his shaking voice barely more than a whisper. "From the very beginning? This was all a lie? Is that why you asked me to coffee and…and then the beach? And the…. kiss?"

"Finally catching on?" Bryce drawled before Sarah could respond. "Are all those Stanford smarts paying off now, Bartowski? Of course she used you. That's her job. To get information and ensure the success of the mission by any means necessary."

"Bryce!" Sarah snapped, glaring daggers at her arrogant partner. Bryce just snorted and turned back the window.

Chuck heard Bryce's words, but he couldn't tear his eyes away from Sarah. He couldn't believe what she was telling him…well, he could, and that was why he couldn't breathe. She'd lied to him. Everything she'd ever said, or done, was fake. A means to an end. And he'd fallen for it.

"Chuck," her voice was soft, obviously trying to amend the situation, but Chuck was hardly listening to her anymore. The roar of blood in his ears and angry pounding of his heart was making it difficult to concentrate. "My spending time with you and your family was, in part, for the mission. But I wasn't lying to you. Not about everything."

"Oh, not about everything?" Chuck felt himself snap. He leaned forward, clenching the chair's armrests tightly to keep his hands from shaking. "Just the small things? Like wanting to really get to know me and my family? Or pretending that you cared about my game? Or that you thought me moving forward after my dad left was brave? Which one of those wasn't a lie?"

Sarah was rendered speechless. Chuck saw the way she flinched when he mentioned his father and how her eyes flickered away from him very briefly, as if she were ashamed to hold his gaze.

"Enough of this," Bryce said moving to stand in front of Chuck, blocking Sarah from his view and cutting off Chuck's rant. "You're ignoring the bigger picture here. You work for a criminal. We are asking for your help to take him down. The CIA is asking for your help. Put a band aid on your wounded pride and pull your head out of your ass, Bartowski."

"I'm not obligated to help you," Chuck seethed, although he wasn't entirely sure if that was true or not. He didn't know how much the CIA could do to order civilians around. But if Bryce's grimace was any indication, then Chuck was right. "And why should I? If you wanted my help you should have told me the truth from the start. What good was lying supposed to do?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Bryce growled. "You think we should have told a man we hardly knew, who was willingly employed for our mark, all of our secrets? We should have let him right in on the plan and join in all of the fun? If you weren't such a weepy, bleeding heart Bartowski, we could have had the information we needed and been out of your life before you even had a chance to blink." Bryce was very close now, his sharp blue eyes burning into Chuck's, the snarl on his features deepening as he spat each word.

"Bryce, stop," Sarah said finally, standing and tugging his elbow to pull him away. "This isn't helping."

"No, it's not," Chuck said, finally rising from his armchair, praying that his shaking legs wouldn't give out beneath him. "And neither am I. I'm not going to help you."

Both Bryce and Sarah stared at him in shock. Chuck was a little surprised with himself too. He wasn't sure where the sudden burst of confidence was coming from, especially considering that he could keep his hands from trembling even though they were clenched tightly at his sides.

"I'm not going to help you," he repeated, embellishing his decision with a sharp nod. "And I want you both to leave. Now." Chuck bit back the 'please' he was about to utter just in time. Bryce's face was turning red, the corners of his mouth twitching into a snarl, but before he could explode, Sarah stood up and pushed him aside so that she stood in front of Chuck.

"Chuck, please. This is bigger than you and me. Roark is a dangerous man and we need _you_ to take him down." The pleading tone in Sarah's voice almost broke him. She gazed up at him with bright blue eyes, but suddenly Chuck found himself wondering if this was all an act too. Was she really that desperate for his help? Or was she still using his feelings for her as leverage? Another spike of anger coursed through him, and he shook his head.

"Why should I help you?" he asked bitterly. "After all you did, all the lies, you expect me to turn around and do whatever you ask? I'm not that kind of guy anymore, Sarah. _You_ told me not to be that guy…You inspired me to be better." Sarah's shoulders slumped and Chuck knew he'd managed to deliver her a powerful blow. "You could have told me the truth. I would have helped. But all you did was lie, from the very beginning."

"That's not true, Chuck." Sarah's eyes flickered to Bryce who was still watching the conversation intently. "I wasn't honest with you about what I was doing back in Burbank, but that doesn't mean that I don't...That I didn't-"

"Stop," Chuck interrupted, holding up his hands. He didn't want to hear any excuses, he didn't want an explanation. He wanted Sarah to leave, so that he didn't have to feel his heart ache every time he looked at her. "There's nothing you can say to fix this. I'm not going to help you."

Chuck wasn't expecting the devastated look that appeared on Sarah's face. She took a step away from him and then a moment later, the expression was gone, replaced by the impassive mask he'd seen when she left the beach house.

"Let's go, Bryce," she said quietly, ignoring her partner's sputtering protest and pulling him towards the front door.

Chuck watched silently as they made their way to the door. Sarah's eyes were dark, in spite of the sunlight that brightened the room, but she didn't look angry. Chuck couldn't quite tell what it was she was feeling; her features were set in a grave expression that gave nothing away. But Chuck felt drawn into her darkened eyes the longer he stared. There was something else in them that he couldn't describe, a turmoil he didn't understand. And he felt ensnared by the emotions captured within them that he so badly wanted to hear her express. Then Sarah blinked and looked away from him, and the moment was over. Chuck watched the two of them walk through the front door, their heads held high until the very last second, when Sarah turned once again, avoiding his eyes this time, and closed the door soundly behind them.

Chuck's shaking legs gave out from underneath him and he collapsed into the armchair, dropping his face into his hands and letting out a long, shuddering breath. His chest ached, his body hurt, his limbs shook. Everything in him was screaming that he should run, somewhere, anywhere, just away from here. Away from the hurt and the betrayal he felt. He'd fallen for another woman whose only interest was to toy with his heart, and then crush it when she was done with him. He'd been in love with Jill during his Stanford years, and the day he found out that she'd been cheating on him was the day he thought he'd never fall in love again. He'd never known pain like the kind he felt that day. Until now.

Sarah, the woman who'd inspired him to take control of his life; who'd helped him believe that he was worthy of success and happiness, had lied to him from the very start. Playing with his heart, his trust, his emotions, and then devastating him without rhyme or reason. He corrected himself quickly, her reason was that she was a spy, it was her job to lie to people. But somehow that only made Chuck feel worse, like he should have been able to see it coming long ago, when they'd first met. Chuck rubbed his eyes, furiously fighting back the tears forming there, he didn't have time to fall apart right now. He still needed to get to work, and Roark would not be happy if he arrived late twice within the span of one week.

 **o-o-o-o**

"What's the plan now?" Bryce asked in the cab back to Maison23. The muscles in his jaw clenched and unclenched along with his fists. He'd come very close to a physical altercation with Chuck, a civilian, back at the apartment complex, and Sarah hadn't been able to do much to cool the situation. She hadn't wanted to leave Chuck's apartment the way they did, but Bryce's snide remarks to Chuck's distress made it impossible to even hope for a desirable outcome. Sarah desperately wanted to find a way to explain to Chuck how wrong he was about the moments they had shared together, that it was not all lies, but what could she really have done with Bryce standing right there?

He would have called her out immediately. Told Graham she'd been compromised; convinced him she wasn't fit for the mission. Would Chuck have believed anything she told him after she'd showed him her badge anyway? Whether or not he believed there had been even a modicum of truth in anything she told him, she still lied about one very important thing; who she was. There had never been any truth to that. Or at least, Sarah realized, not until she'd met him. The Sarah Walker Chuck had come to know was the most that she had felt like herself in a long time. It had been ages since she'd been able to drop the mask of Agent Walker and just be Sarah instead. Chuck had given her that freedom. And in return, she'd spurned him, wounded him, broken his family's trust and lost the only person she could truly call friend.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck was late again, in spite of his best efforts to beat traffic. He stepped through the front door of Roark Instruments, mind still spinning from his confrontation with Sarah and Bryce, and was immediately cornered by an agitated John Casey.

"Bartowski, there you are!" he barked, grabbing Chuck by the front of his shirt and dragging him past the security desk to the small office located just behind it before Chuck could even try to begin explaining himself.

"Casey! I just bought this shirt!"

Casey shut and locked the door behind them and shoved Chuck down into the nearest chair, crossing his arms and peering at him through narrowed eyes.

"Is there a reason I'm being interrogated so early in the morning?" Chuck drawled, trying in vain to straighten the wrinkles in his new shirt.

"Larkin was looking for you," Casey growled.

"Oh, he found me."

"He found you?" Casey looked even more suspicious now. "What happened? What did he want?"

"He-," Chuck paused and looked up at the security guard towering above him. "Why do you care?"

Casey grunted. "I don't trust the guy. He came in here while you were away this weekend, claiming the two of you were good buddies. He wanted into your office. I told him no and then did what I could to find some sort of background on him. Wanna know what I found?" It was apparently a rhetorical question because Casey didn't wait for Chuck's reply before continuing. "Nothing. Nada, zip. The guy doesn't exist. Bryce Larkin is a fake name. He's got an old out-of-date Friendster account and that's it."

Chuck looked down at his lap. He knew why Bryce Larkin didn't exist, but honestly, he'd expected a CIA agent to have more of an airtight cover. Could he tell Casey the truth? In all honesty, Casey was probably the most trustworthy person Chuck knew when it came to loyalty to his country, and even if he didn't reveal the truth, Casey was smart enough to figuring it out on his own. Chuck thought about the promise he had made Sarah about not telling anybody, but at this point, not only didn't he care about that, but he could really use someone to talk to, so he decided to go for broke.

"Bryce Larkin is not who he says he is," Chuck began slowly. "He's….An agent." Casey's brows rose just slightly, the only sign that he'd been surprised by Chuck's revelation. "He works for the CIA and he's here to investigate our boss. He thinks that Roark is a criminal."

"How do you know all this?"

"Because he and Sarah came to my apartment this morning and asked me to help them get the information they needed on Roark."

"Your girl is in on this too?" Casey asked, almost as if he were musing to himself. Chuck felt a bolt of anger course through him.

"She's not _my girl_. She lied to me." Just as quickly, he calmed down. "Casey, everything she said to me, this whole week, has been a lie."

Casey quirked a brow at the pout creeping into Chuck's tone, but continued on with another question. "They asked you for information on Roark. What did you tell them?"

"Nothing! I didn't tell them anything," Chuck said angrily. "How do I know I can trust them? Roark's never done anything to make me believe he's a bad guy. Why should I tell them anything?"

"Because they work for the Government," Casey replied easily. "And because your loyalty to the man who hired you is about as unwarranted as a crush on a school professor. Roark hired you because you're smart, Bartowski. Usually. You do your job well and you make him money. That's the end of it. You owe him nothing. While these two agents of yours know something you don't, and because one of them hurt your feelings, you've decided it would be a better idea to assist a possible terrorist rather than swallow your damn pride."

"Wait a second," Chuck sputtered. "That's not fair, Casey. It's not about pride. But they don't have any proof! I trust Roark more than I trust them. What has he done to make them think that there's something shady going on anyway?"

"Don't know," Casey said. "But they obviously have a reason. Did you think to ask before you got swept away by your lady feelings?"

Chuck frowned, feeling an angry blush beginning to warm the back of his neck. "Casey, stop, seriously. You don't even know Bryce and Sarah! Why are you jumping on their side?"

"Some strange things have been happening around here, especially during off hours." It made sense that Casey could catch anything that happened after the building was supposed to be shut down for the night. For the longest time, Chuck had been under the impression that Casey practically lived out of his office. "I've seen delivery trucks in the loadings docks late at night, way past our normal delivery hours."

"And what are they delivering?" Chuck interrupted.

"Don't know. Haven't been able to get close enough to find out. Whoever they are, they're efficient. In and out within minutes, and Roark's been there each time, checking the delivery personally." Chuck frowned. That was odd. It wasn't like Roark to oversee something so tedious. He had an entire team dedicated to checking shipments and deliveries. There was certainly something strange going on if he felt the need to supervise the deliveries himself late at night.

"Not only that," Casey continued. "But I noticed something odd about how Roark has set up the research divisions. Each cell, including yours, is assigned its own project, which is not suspicious in and of itself. But there's no communication between them. I'll bet you can't tell me what the guys in the office right next to yours are working on, can you?"

Chuck shook his head slowly. "I just assumed it was something similar to what Pete, Jose and I were doing."

"You'd be wrong," Casey said. "And the finished projects are always sent directly to Roark. There's no unit that brings all of the products together, which means that Roark outsources them somewhere. Your work, your software and technology, are being assembled outside of the company. Why would Roark feel the need to pull together the tech he develops outside of his own company when he has plenty of research cells he could dedicate to that cause?"

Chuck simply blinked in reply.

"And then, there's this," Casey grabbed the back of Chuck's chair and swiveled it around so that he was facing the array of security monitors on the wall. Casey pointed to the monitor on the far right, the one that hung in the south corner of Roark's office. Their boss sat at his desk, leaning back in his chair and rifling through a stack of paperwork, unhurriedly, as if he were simply reading the Daily Post. Chuck threw a dubious look over his shoulder at Casey.

"I'm sorry, am I supposed to see something suspicious? He's going through paperwork, Casey! That's part of his job."

"Shut up and keep watching, moron," Casey growled, his eyes still glued to the security monitor. Chuck heaved a sigh and looked back at the screen. He stared in silence for another two minutes before throwing his arms in the air, allowing them to fall back into his lap with a 'smack'. "Casey! Nothing is happening!"

"Exactly," Casey said before Chuck could continue. "It's a loop."

A loop? Why would Roark loop the footage for a security feed? It was Casey's job to make sure he stayed safe. There was no reason for him to hide what he was doing unless….unless Sarah and Bryce were right and Roark was working on something he didn't want anyone to know about.

"Watch his left hand," Casey continued, tapping the monitor as he spoke. "Every 60 seconds he taps it three times, the same rhythm, same speed, without fail."

Chuck leaned closer, peering at the screen until he was almost cross-eyed, and waited. Sure enough, Casey was right. Roark's index finger tapped three times, right on cue, and that wasn't the only clue that suggested the footage had been looped. Casey inserted a tape from the previous week and Chuck waited patiently while he sped through the footage until he found the moment that Roark took a seat at his desk, reclined in his chair, and began slowly rifling through paperwork once again. His index finger tapping three times every sixty seconds.

"What…."Chuck trailed off, searching the scene for any sign of something different, any proof to suggest that they were wrong.

"Every Monday morning, at 8am, like clockwork. He sits down at his computer and then this loops on my security feed. I have no idea how to counter hack it and without a bug in his office I have no way of knowing what it is he's doing in there."

"How long does the loop play?" Chuck asked.

"Twenty minutes. Sometimes thirty."

Chuck looked down at his watch; it was 8:19 now. He flicked his gaze back to the monitor, waiting until the minute rolled over. The second it did Chuck saw a jump in the footage. It was slight, barely noticeable. In fact, he would have missed it had he not been watching for it. But a slight cut and a brief grainy filter covered the footage and then Roark leaned forward in his chair and stretched. Chuck noticed his hand was no longer near the paperwork, but closer to his phone instead.

"Oh my god, they were right," Chuck murmured to himself. Casey grunted an agreement.

"He's hiding something, that's for sure. I don't know if it's as serious as what your agent buddies are suggesting, but why Roark would need to hide anything seems fishy to me."

"So what do we do?" Chuck asked, tearing his eyes away from the monitor and swiveling around in his chair. "How do we find out what's going on?"

Casey stood straight and crossed his arms over his broad chest, giving Chuck a look that told him he already knew the answer. "You go back to those agents, swallow your pride, and tell them you'll do whatever you can to help them get what they need."

Chuck clenched his jaw, looking down at his lap to avoid letting Casey see the angry tears pricking the corners of his eyes. He didn't want to see Sarah. Not so soon after discovering that she'd been using him like he was nothing more than a puppet.

"Chuck." Chuck's head snapped up at the sound of his first name coming from Casey. The man's tone wasn't soft by any means, but there was an expression on his face akin to sympathy. "I know you're upset, but there are larger things at stake here. You have a chance to do something good. Who knows how treacherous Roark really is? But if the CIA is involved, I can promise you that by helping them, you have a chance to be a real hero. You could put a stop to something that puts a lot of innocent people in danger. Don't let that chance go by just because you're hurting."

Chuck gaped at Casey for a long while, simply unable to find the words to respond. Casey had gone right to the heart of the issue, without any fluff or pandering. And Chuck knew he was right. If there was something shady going on at Roark Instruments, he didn't want to be a part of the team that contributed to the successful completion of the project. He had an opportunity to put a stop to it and he couldn't turn his back on it, no matter how much it might hurt to see Sarah again.

"You're right."

"I know I am," Casey grunted. "I'm always right. Now go and find those agents and tell them they have our support."

"You're helping too?" Chuck asked quickly. It gave him no small amount of comfort to know that if he had to deal with Bryce and Sarah that he'd have the gruff security guard on his side.

"Of course I'm helping. I may be retired but if my country needs me, there's nothing that will stop me from rising to the occasion." Casey jerked his chin towards the monitor and Chuck saw Roark rising from his desk and disappearing out of frame, going to make his rounds through the building. And probably, Chuck realized, going to check on the status of his project. Roark wanted it ready for presentation at NextExpo and that was only five days away.

"Get back to your office," Casey said, unlocking the door and pushing Chuck through it, wrinkling his shirt again in the process. "And don't let on that you suspect anything, Bartowski. Act natural."

Chuck swallowed nervously and nodded a quick goodbye to Casey, hurrying down the hallway to his office, praying that he wouldn't let anything slip by accident.

 **February 12** **th** **, Los Angeles, CA: 1730 hours**

Chuck stood outside the faded green door that the lobby concierge had directed him too. He stared at the plated gold numbers until his vision began to swim, and he was forced to blink the numbers back into focus. He'd been standing outside the door for a little over five minutes, trying to gather enough courage to knock, but his hands refused to listen to his commands. His palms were growing clammy and his knees were beginning to shake, but before he could give up and decide to run instead of face Bryce and Sarah, he forced his fist against the door, pounding on it far harder than was necessary.

As fate would have it, it was Sarah who opened it, her brows jumping when she saw him standing in the doorway.

"Chuck." Was all she said, and her tone was enough to make him realize that she hadn't really expected to see him again. Maybe ever. It gave him an odd sense of satisfaction, however brief, to know that for once, he was the one who had the upper hand.

"I'll help you," he said, not willing to stand around and talk longer than he had to. Getting right to the point, making it quick and easy, was the only way he knew he could get through this. "I'll help you get into Roark Instruments and find what you need."

The door opened a little wider and Bryce appeared next to Sarah, pinning Chuck with his icy blue gaze. "What made you change your mind?"

Chuck waved his question away. "That's not important. What matters is that I can get you in to the building and into Roark's office. Will that be enough?"

Bryce looked at Sarah, but she had her gaze glued to Chuck, who chose to focus on Bryce instead so that he wouldn't get sucked into those crystal blue eyes of hers. Finally, after a long silence that was beginning to make Chuck itch uncomfortably, Bryce said, "Yeah, that should be enough."

"Good." Chuck nodded his assent. "Then I'll help. But after you get what you need, I want to be left alone. No more lies, no more covers. You two leave and I get back to my normal life. Deal?"

Finally, Chuck dared to glance at Sarah and he saw pain etched onto her face, her brows now drawn low, shadowing her eyes. He almost took back his words. Almost reiterated that it wasn't her he never wanted to see again, it was Bryce, it was the CIA. But he didn't. He let the words hang in the air, let them sting her the same way that hers had wounded him the previous morning.

"You have a deal," Bryce said, his eyes flickering between Chuck and Sarah. "As soon as we have Roark, we'll leave."

"And I won't be questioned? Or pulled in by some CIA red tape?"

"No." Chuck nearly jumped when he heard Sarah speak, he hadn't really expected her to take part in the conversation after what he'd just said. But the pain he'd seen on her face was gone, replaced by the stolid expression he kept seeing when she reverted back to 'agent mode'. "Bryce is right. We get what we need, and the CIA won't have anything else to ask of you. You won't even know we were here."

Unbeknownst to Bryce, Sarah and Chuck were waging war on each other with words, subtle phrases that cut likes knives and Chuck flinched when he realized the implications of her last statement. He didn't want to forget her. He just wanted the truth. But maybe that was more than he could ever ask of her.

"Okay." Chuck couldn't find a reply more eloquent than that. "Then meet me in the coffee shop on Riverside Drive at 8am on Friday. I'll have tickets to get you into NextExpo so you can explore the building under the radar from there. I have a friend in security who can help us out too. And don't worry," Chuck added when he saw Bryce open his mouth to protest. "You can trust him."

Bryce narrowed his eyes, eventually grunting his assent and reaching out to shake Chuck's hand. "It's a plan."

Chuck hesitated momentarily before taking the hand Bryce proffered. His grip was strong, almost threateningly so. As soon as Bryce let his hand go, Chuck turned to leave, his eyes flickering over Sarah for a brief moment. The impassive mask was still on her face, but Chuck caught a whirlwind of emotions behind her eyes. Briefly, he let himself wonder if she was just as confused as he was right now. Just as conflicted and hurt. But he quickly dispelled that thought. She'd used him, she'd never cared. She was just an agent. And Chuck was just an asset. He would have to be a fool to think anything different.

Then maybe, Chuck realized, he _was_ just a fool. Because he didn't want to give up the notion that somewhere deep inside, Sarah did care about him; maybe more than she was letting on.

* * *

 _Thank you all for reading and waiting for this update. The reviews for the last chapter were amazing, and insightful, and so inspiring and I appreciate each and every one. I can't tell you when the next update will be out, but I can tell you that it's being written and developed at this very moment. This story make take some time, but it's not in danger of being abandoned._

 _Until next time!_


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** _Woah, what? Another update within the span of two weeks? Don't get used to it punks! The reviews and support you all gave for the last chapter was absolutely phenomenal, I was blown away by everyone's kind words. And I was also pretty amused with how many of you wanted Bryce's head on a platter. Well, you're in luck, Bryce Larkin faces his comeuppances...finally. That being said! I feel there may be a little discontent that Chuck is not the one to really necessitate a violent fight. As far as I'm concerned, Chuck is not a violent guy, unless it comes to defending someone he truly cares about. Only then would he be the type to come to blows. Example A being his fight with Shaw after the death of his father. But Bryce antagonizing him in this AU with words, didn't feel like quite enough to me for the two of them to come to blows, although fantasizing a punch is always nice. All this to say, yes, Bryce Larkin will be taken down a few pegs, but I realize it may not totally live up to what a few of you might have been hoping for. Enough babbling!_

 _We are reaching the max level of angst in this chapter, and I would just like to remind everyone that this story will have a happy ending. I promise. Happy and fluffy and sickeningly sweet. The kind of sweet I was nervous about writing in my previous fic, for those of you that were there for that update. I know I said that last time, but it's true. Seriously. Hang in there. We'll get there!_

 _Oh right and kudos to **michaelfmx** for being a beta or something._

 _I do hope you enjoy this update! You are all incredible and fantastic and I can't thank you enough for reading. Here we go:_

* * *

 **February 14th, Maison23 Apartments, 2100 Hours:**

Bryce's soft snores filled the apartment suite, but they weren't what was keeping Sarah awake. She hadn't been able to find peace of mind, let alone a good night's sleep, since the confrontation with Chuck; and besides that, today was Valentine's Day. The frivolous holiday usually went unnoticed by Sarah. She was rarely ever in a position to share it with anyone; more often than not, she was too busy tracking down illegal arms dealers or terrorist cells in foreign countries. And even if she had found the time to spare, there had never been anyone in her life that she'd wanted to share this day with. It was pointless, it was over commercialized, it was just another stupid holiday that held no real significance. And even though she repeated these words to herself over and over again, her mind kept going back to Chuck. She imagined that this day might mean a lot more to him than it ever had to her. He was so obviously a romantic, and more than that, he genuinely cared about showing people how much they meant to him. Part of her was curious what he might have done for her today had she not broken his trust. Or if he would have made a move at all, considering he might still have assumed that she was with Bryce. And the most frustrating thing of all, Sarah realized, was that now she would never have the chance to find out.

Sarah curled deeper into the armchair that she'd pulled up to the window and gazed out at the city lights that twinkled against the night sky. Dozens of couples walked below, enjoying the night and one another's company, but Sarah was alone. And this time, the solitude wasn't peaceful or comforting. This time it felt empty, painful. Sarah wasn't just alone, she was lonely, and not just for Chuck's company. His entire family, even Morgan and Anna, had made her feel so at home, so normal. She'd been so happy just to talk with them and watch them interact with one another. Without hesitation, they'd welcomed her into their little fold. And the moment she lost Chuck, she had lost them as well.

 _Home_ , Sarah mused to herself. She'd never really had a place that she _could_ call home. Especially not once her father had started taking her along with him on his con jobs. Who would have guessed that a stranger she'd met on the beach would have been the one to make her feel like she belonged somewhere? Like she deserved real happiness and a real life? Sarah knew she didn't; she'd accepted that fact long ago. She was not a good person, she didn't do good things. The life that Chuck had shown her was nothing more than a dream that she had no hope of ever making a reality.

Bryce snorted and rolled over in his sleep, taking a large portion of the comforter with him as he splayed across the bed. Sarah glanced over her shoulder at him, realizing that she would now be forced to spend the night on the armchair; not that it would be too much of an issue. She wanted nothing to do with her partner, who had antagonized and tormented Chuck without reason. She might have been able to convince Chuck of how much she trusted him and how much his companionship meant to her, if only Bryce hadn't been there. But there was no going back now. Chuck was hurt and angry, and Sarah couldn't blame him. She was angry with herself too, for so many reasons. Everything had gone so wrong and she didn't know what she could do to fix it, or even if she should try. It would be easier to let Chuck hate her; to leave when they had Roark and let him move on with his life. But that would mean letting go of the one person that had come to mean more to Sarah than anyone she'd ever known. Sarah was used to letting go, but could she really forget Chuck and the normal life he'd given her a taste of so easily?

Sarah looked out her window again and wondered if he was one of the many figures strolling along the street down below. She hoped he was. She hoped he'd joined his friends or his family and spent the night enjoying himself rather than giving into the misery he must be feeling. Sarah leaned back in her chair, pulling her robe tightly around herself and letting her eyes slide shut. She was still restless and confused, but for tonight, there was nothing more she could do but try and find some peace by sleeping. They were meeting Chuck for the mission tomorrow and she needed rest if they were going to pull it off successfully.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck lay on his back, gazing up at the ceiling of his darkened bedroom. Ellie and Devon had left for their Valentine's Day dinner reservation nearly an hour ago, although Ellie had been hovering around him like a nervous mother hen for the better part of the day. She'd even offered to cancel the reservation and spend the night at home to be nearby if he needed anything, but Chuck refused immediately. Ellie didn't deserve to be punished because of what Sarah had done to him. He wasn't angry with his sister, or his brother-in-law, or even his best friend, for going out and enjoying themselves this evening. It wasn't their fault that he had no one to spend the holiday with.

Chuck would be lying if he said he hadn't fantasized about spending this day with Sarah. Or at least he had before the beach and before he'd discovered all the lies. And even then, he couldn't help but wonder how it might have been different if she hadn't told him she was a spy. Ignorance was bliss, or so the proverb went. But then he wondered if it might have been worse had he still been unaware of Sarah's career in the CIA. Maybe he would have been tormented by images of her and Bryce enjoying themselves at a romantic dinner...or back at their apartment...Chuck shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut tight. It didn't matter if Sarah and Bryce weren't together, the reality was just as painful. The lies had torn his hopes apart and destroyed the trust he'd placed in her.

Somewhere deep down, amidst all of the pain, Chuck was still wrestling with the realization that Sarah Walker was a spy. An actual CIA agent, like the ones in all of his and Morgan's favorite action flicks. Or maybe it really wasn't quite like those films. Guns, car chases, hand-to-hand fights to the death; all of those things were probably exaggerated for entertainment purposes...Right? But what if they weren't? Chuck's imagination was running amuck with the idea that, along with being the most gorgeous woman he'd ever laid eyes on, Sarah Walker was also a proficient and badass fighter. The idea was almost too overwhelming for Chuck to comprehend. And then reality dragged him away from his fantasy, reminding him harshly that even if all of that were true, Chuck would never get to see it. Sarah didn't lead a life that allowed for personal connections, and Chuck wasn't sure it was worth trying to change that.

And yet, he couldn't bring himself to hate her, or even be truly angry with her. He was hurt, yes, but Sarah meant too much to him to spurn her. She'd changed the direction of his life without even meaning to. Maybe, he realized, that was why it hurt so much to know that she'd willingly lied to him. He'd wanted to believe that they had something special, even with Bryce still in the picture. He'd wanted to believe he had a chance with her, a chance for something real. At least he could take some solace in the fact that their first encounter on the beach had been genuine. It hadn't had anything to do with her being a spy; or at least, not that he was aware of. The connection they'd shared on the beach that day had been genuine. But where had the lies started after that? How long had Sarah been planning on using him?

Chuck rolled onto his side, curling around his pillow and pulling it tightly against his chest. The mission was tomorrow and, along with the anger, hurt and confusion, he was extremely nervous. What if they did find evidence of Roark's treachery? What if they were caught? What if Ellie and Devon or Morgan were put in danger because of what he was about to do? Technically, he'd promised not to tell anyone about Sarah and Bryce's association with the CIA, but he'd already broken that promise by talking with Casey. And it might even be safer for Ellie and Awesome if he warned them of his mission ahead of time. Then again, it would be a little absurd to reveal Sarah's true identity to them on Valentine's Day, when all of their thoughts were focused on each other. This wasn't their burden anyway, it was Chuck's. He'd gotten himself into it, and now he had to get himself out. Chuck closed his eyes, knowing that sleep wouldn't come easy, but if he didn't try exhaustion would make tomorrow's mission even more difficult than it was already bound to be.

 **February 15, Riverside Drive, LA: 0800 Hours:**

Chuck shifted nervously from foot to foot, playing with the strap of his laptop bag while he waited for Bryce and Sarah to arrive at the coffee shop. He glanced down at his watch, 8 o'clock exactly, and they still hadn't shown up. He looked around the cafe once more, paranoid that someone was watching him, that they somehow knew what he was about to do. But no one looked back at him, they were all busy perusing their newspapers or computer screens.

Chuck's head snapped up when he heard the chime of the front door, signaling that someone had entered. They looked...different, Chuck noted, but it was undoubtedly Sarah and Bryce who now stood in the entrance, eyes roaming the cafe as they looked for him. Chuck raised an arm and Sarah saw him first, she tugged Bryce over by the sleeve of his aptly nerdy, plaid button up shirt, and then the three of them took a seat at the corner table. Chuck looked them up and down before he spoke, noting the humble attire and the glasses that each of them wore. Bryce's, in particular, caught his attention. He'd chosen a pair of thickly framed bifocals with a strap threaded through the earpieces that looped around the back of his neck. It was nerdy alright, and just ridiculous enough to make Chuck feel a little more confident around the guy.

Sarah, on the other hand, was stunning no matter what she wore. And even though she'd tried to downplay her natural beauty with a simple purple cardigan and similarly simple glasses, Chuck knew she'd draw attention today if they weren't careful.

"You two look...uh...good," Chuck said, clearing his throat and reaching into his bag to grab the passes he'd managed to acquire for the both of them.

Bryce grimaced in reply and gestured lazily at Chuck. "We took our cues from the master nerd himself, Bartowski." Chuck frowned and looked down at his own outfit. For once, Bryce's insult held no bearing on him. As far as he was concerned, their chosen uniforms were a far more exaggerated form of 'nerdy' than was probably necessary. But Chuck was wearing the clothes he normally picked out for work; his crisp, white button up shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows, a dark grey tie and even darker slacks, with the expensive leather belt Ellie had bought him when he'd first learned he'd gotten the job at RI. Chuck knew he looked good, so he ignored Bryce's absurd comment and laid out the two I.D. badges on the table in front of him.

"You'll need these to get in," Chuck said as Bryce and Sarah hung the blue lanyards around their necks. "Just hand them to the security guard out front, his name is John Casey. He'll let you in, he's on our side. Once you're in, pass the main conference room and follow the hallway until you get to my office; number 115. I'll be waiting for you. From there we'll-"

"Hold on," Bryce interrupted, holding up his hands. "Your job was to get us in. We're the professionals here, Bartowski. Once we're inside, we'll decide how the mission goes."

Chuck glared at Bryce, who raised his eyebrows challengingly in return. Finally, Chuck shrugged and leaned back in his seat, donning an untroubled expression. "Fine. You take the lead. But answer me this; do you have a plan for what you're going to do if one of our many hardworking security personnel, who will not be as informed as Mr. John Casey, ask what two guests are doing wandering around the building so far away from the main conference hall? Do you know how to get through the maze of offices above the first floor? Do you have a personal friend with a key to every room in the building, including Roark's office? Have you planned your route through the building according to the schedule for the convention? Have you ever tried to hold a conversation with an enthusiastic computer hardware engineer about the progress he's made on his personally designed computer using the latest technology in circuit boards and graphics cards?"

Bryce could only stare at him, mouth agape. Chuck raised his brows mockingly and leaned forward in his chair again. "Didn't think so. Look, you two came to _me_ for help, remember? I know this building and I have the resources to get us into Roark's office undetected. So unless you really think you can pull off _naive nerd_ without the help of 'the master'," Chuck spat the words out, using Bryce's own insult again him now, "Then I'll be the one calling the shots today, Bryce."

Chuck could feel his heart hammering against his ribcage as silence fell over them, but it wasn't from fear. He was exhilarated, proud even, that he had the confidence and the knowledge to put the arrogant agent in his place. Chuck glanced over at Sarah, doing a double take when he saw the way she was staring at him with rounded eyes. There was a slight flush on her cheeks too that he found a little concerning.

"You feeling okay?" he asked. His voice apparently broke whatever spell Sarah was under because she blinked rapidly, cleared her throat, sat back in her chair and nodded tersely.

"Yes. Sorry."

Bryce's brow furrowed as he studied the obvious blush coloring his partner's cheeks. "Oh god," he muttered and rolled his eyes. "Come on, Walker...Keep it in your pants."

Chuck was confused by Bryce's statement, but Sarah, on the other hand, seemed livid. She turned on Bryce with a fierce scowl, and Chuck figured it would be best to calm the situation before they started a brawl in the coffee shop.

"Guys, focus," he hissed, drawing their attention back to him again, although both still looked extremely peeved. "We don't have time to argue. The convention starts in an hour, and I can promise you that there's already a line of people around the block waiting to get in." Chuck glanced at his watch again. If they hurried, they could make it to RI at 9 o'clock exactly. By the time they rendezvoused in his office, the convention would be well underway. He looked back up at Bryce and Sarah, each one studying him with a different expression written on their face. "So, are you two ready?"

They nodded in unison and Chuck rose from his chair, shouldering his computer bag and gesturing for the two agents to follow. "Then follow me."

Suddenly, Chuck paused, throwing a look at Bryce over his shoulder as they walked through the cafe. "Oh and Bryce? If you could keep the nasty comments to yourself for the remainder of this mission, that'd be great." He gave the stunned agent a nose wrinkling grin, confident that Bryce wouldn't actually physically assault him in the middle of a crowded coffee shop. The tension was broken when a loud squeak followed by a sudden bang drew the attention of Chuck, Bryce and the rest of the cafe's clientele. Chuck looked over Bryce's shoulder to see Sarah struggling to right a chair, while untangling herself from one of its legs.

She was still mumbling angrily to herself when she looked up to see Bryce and Chuck staring at her, and she flushed a deep red. "Stupid tables are so damn close together."

"You okay?" Chuck asked again, not really sure if it was safe to try and help her if he wanted to keep all of his limbs. But then Chuck caught her eyes and he realized the indignant display she was putting on was just that, a front. She flushed again when their gazes met and shoved the offending chair aside, straightening her mussed cardigan and striding past Chuck and Bryce with her chin held high.

Bryce rolled his eyes and muttered something that Chuck couldn't make out but Sarah apparently had, because she whirled on Bryce and hissed through gritted teeth, "What was that?"

"Nothing," Bryce retorted, narrowing his eyes and brushing past her through the front door. Sarah looked ready to explode, a fact compounded by her reddened cheeks. And in spite of how hurt he'd been by her words the previous day, Chuck felt the need to comfort her now.

"Hey." She looked at him sharply, and then down at her hands, straightening the sleeves of her already perfect cardigan, and Chuck could see the blush spreading to the back of her neck. It was obvious to him now that he'd done something to fluster her, but what, he wasn't sure. It wasn't like it mattered anyway, they had a mission to take care of. And so, instead of questioning her sudden inelegance, he simply asked. "You ready?"

Sarah nodded, taking a deep breath that seemed to clear the color from her cheeks and gestured for him to lead the way.

 **o-o-o-o**

John Casey scanned the I.D. of the short, chubby, curly haired IT man standing at the front of the line and handed it back to him with a grunt. "Next," he barked, while beside him, his fellow security guards, Linsley and Howell, helped by splitting the long line into two shorter ones. They scanned I.D.'s more quickly than he did, but that didn't bother Casey. He was on a mission today, and he was waiting for two guests in particular. Chuck had described the two CIA agents he was supposed to be looking for today, but so far there was no sign of them.

Quickly, while scanning the I.D. of a tall, brunette woman, Casey glanced down at his watch. The convention hall would officially open in ten minutes, which meant that set up inside the building was nearly finished and presentations would be starting soon. Including Roark's. Chuck and his friends needed to hurry if they expected to get into his office while he was busy speaking to the people gathered in the convention hall.

Casey looked up again to see that the tall, brunette was gone, replaced by two people far too attractive, and far too confident in the way they held themselves to belong at a tech convention like this. And that's when he recognized Bryce Larkin, even past the ridiculous bifocals and shirt that was buttoned up all the way to the collar. The woman at his side was unfamiliar, but it could only be Sarah. The Sarah that Chuck was utterly smitten with, and now Casey understood why.

"I.D.'s," he grunted, holding out his hand for their lanyards. He saw Bryce's eyes land on his security badge where his name was printed in bold at the top. No words were exchanged, but Bryce met Casey's gaze and a silent understanding passed between them. Casey passed the I.D.'s back to them, without really having scanned them for authenticity, and leaned closer murmuring, "Take the hallway to the left of the main entrance. Office 115 is the one you're looking for." Then in a louder tone he announced, "Enjoy the conference."

Bryce and Sarah offered him pleasant smiles and then traipsed inside. Casey looked out at the long line of people still waiting to enter, and he realized suddenly that until he'd finished scanning, Chuck, Bryce and Sarah were on their own. There was no way he could leave his post now without reason. Casey growled to himself and gestured for the next person in line to step forward. "Next!"

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck set his laptop and bag down on the desk in his office; it was empty, even though he knew Pete and Jose had to be in the building, probably already enjoying a few of the early presentations. He opened his laptop and booted it up, scanning once more through the schedule posted on the NextExpo website, just to be sure that they still had all the time they needed. Nothing had changed and yet Chuck still felt himself beginning to tremble as his nerves took over. He hadn't received word from Bryce or Sarah, or Casey for that matter. He had no idea if they'd managed to get in, or if Casey hadn't been the one to scan their fake I.D.'s or if-

A light rap on the office door interrupted his thoughts and he rushed to open it, nearly knocking over his chair in the process. Bryce and Sarah stood on the other side. He ushered them in quickly, peeking his head out and glancing both ways down the hall before closing the door behind him. Turning around, he saw that both agents were now looking at him expectantly, and his nerves came back in full force. He couldn't fail today, and not just for their sake, but for his own, for his family's and for anyone else who could be put in danger by whatever it was that Roark was doing.

"What's the plan now, Bartowski?" Bryce asked, and there was just enough venom in his tone to fuel Chuck's confidence again.

"We're going to take the service elevator to the third floor, that's where Roark's office is. His presentation starts in about twenty minutes so he should be busy for a while."

"His presentation?" Sarah asked.

Chuck was almost shocked by the sound of her voice, she'd hardly spoken a single word to him since this morning. "Y-yes," he stuttered. "The project that I've been working on with the guys in this office. It was part of a larger piece of software that Roark wanted to develop. He's revealing it today at his personal panel, but he wanted it to be a complete surprise to everyone in the audience. That's why I had to keep it so close to the vest."

"So not even you know what it is that he's revealing?" Bryce asked.

"No...I mean, not really. I know what I was working on, but I don't know what he's doing with it."

"And what were you working on?" Bryce continued. Chuck licked his lips nervously, hesitating, even though there was really no point in keeping secrets anymore.

"It's...complicated. Roark wanted a piece of software that could compartmentalize and analyze large quantities of encoded data and then store it. Kind of like a hard drive. But not one that had to be carried around. He wanted to be able to upload the information into anything...Even organic matter."

Bryce and Sarah frowned, exchanging glances and looking more confused with every word Chuck spoke. "I know it doesn't make a lot of sense," he continued. "But that's all I know, honestly."

"We need to get into that presentation," Bryce said. "If anything is going to give us enough solid evidence to take Roark into custody, it will be what he presents to the public."

"What? No, we need to get into his office. He has the back-up files stored on his computer. If you have those, you'll have all the evidence you need," Chuck argued.

"And what do we do with that information if we don't understand it?" Bryce shot back. "Look, we can still follow your plan. But I think we need to alter it a little bit. I say, we split up. One of us goes to the presentation to see what Roark has to say about this mysterious project, while the others get into the office and grab the hard evidence."

As much as Chuck wanted to argue with Bryce, he realized that the agent had a point. If not even Chuck could fully explain what it was Roark was trying to do with the technology, then the mission itself would be pointless. "Okay," he agreed after a moment's hesitation. "We'll split up. Roark's presentation will be in the main atrium in twenty minutes. All you need to get in is to present your I.D. So...who's going to go?"

"Bryce, you go to the presentation," Sarah decided. "I'll go with Chuck up to Roark's office."

Bryce's eyes narrowed and his jaw tightened but he didn't object. "Fine. Get what you need and contact me as soon as you're done." Sarah nodded and turned to Chuck, gesturing for him to lead the way. As they departed, Chuck threw a glance over his shoulder at Bryce, who still stood with his arms crossed, eyeing them suspiciously.

"Don't screw this up, Bartowski," he muttered just before the door closed.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah followed Chuck down a few long and twisting hallways, wishing she could think of a way to break the awkward silence between them. Truthfully, she'd been extremely grateful to Bryce for suggesting that they split up, thinking it would give her a chance to speak with Chuck alone. But, if the way he was keeping up a brisk pace so that he was always a few steps ahead of her was any indication, Chuck had no interest in talking. They continued down the hall, dodging passersby-mostly employees-here and there. Once they entered a hall that was almost entirely empty, Sarah jogged a few steps to catch up to Chuck so that they could walk shoulder to shoulder.

"Chuck," she began tentatively, noticing the way he flinched when she said his name. "I just wanted to say...thank you for doing this. For helping us."

"I'm not doing it for you." His reply was icy and it sent a chill down Sarah's spine. She never would have imagined Chuck speaking to her like this. "I'm doing it to protect my family and my friends. And anyone Roark might hurt." He glanced at her and Sarah caught an unbearable amount of pain shining in his glassy eyes. "You were right yesterday, in the apartment. This isn't just about you and me anymore."

His words were harsh, but rightfully so. And Sarah couldn't deny how proud she was of him for standing up for himself and for what he believed was right. So in spite of the ache in her chest, she offered him a small smile and nodded her agreement. Chuck's brows rose, obviously a little shocked by her reaction. But after a moment his shock melted into a smile, a real one. The one that warmed Sarah from head to toe. And then, before she could tell him just how sorry she was for everything that had happened, a loud voice called to them from down the hallway.

"Hey! Bartowski!"

Chuck cringed and turned, allowing an enormous and over exaggerated grin to take over his face as a thick-necked, well-muscled, skin-headed security guard ambled towards them. "Hey, Officer Wisner! How's it going? Enjoying the convention so far? Did you just get back from a vacation? I thought I heard Casey mention something about a vacation?"

The security officer stopped about a foot away from Chuck. They were about the same height, but Wisner's impressive musculature made it seem like he was towering high above them.

The guard leaned forward, baring his teeth at Chuck and hissing, "What do you think you're doing so far outside the convention hall with-" Wisner paused and jerked his chin at Sarah "-unauthorized personnel?"

"Hm? Oh, you mean her?" Chuck looked innocently at Sarah, and then back at Wisner. "Don't worry, buddy. No shady business going on here. I was just helping this lovely young woman find the bathroom. Kind of a big building we have here, you know? Lots of doors, not so many labels. Wouldn't want her walking into a broom closet or anything now, would we?" Chuck barked a laugh and patted Wisner on the shoulder amiably. Wisner growled and Chuck went from patting his shoulder to straightening his sleeve instead.

"Ladies restroom is the other way, Bartowski."

Chuck hesitated and Sarah saw his Adam's apple bob nervously. "So it is! See what I mean? Confusing place, even I get lost sometimes!" Chuck trailed off, tugging on his tie as Wisner took a threatening step forward.

"I suggest you get yourself and your little lady friend back to the main hall before I'm forced to take you down to the security office for the duration of the convention."

"Right...I...wouldn't want that." Wisner was close now, close enough for Sarah to act. She took a swift step forward, planting her left foot and jamming her right knee up into his groin. Wisner doubled over with a howl, his temple level with Sarah's shoulder now. Quickly, she reached out grabbing the man's right arm, just below the elbow and threw her own elbow against the man's temple with as much strength as he could muster. Wisner crumpled to the ground unconscious. Sarah rushed forward, struggling to heft his limp body and toss him into the nearest empty room. She looked up at Chuck for help, but he was staring at her with the largest eyes she'd ever seen, his jaw practically hanging on the ground.

"Chuck!" she hissed, snapping him back to attention. "Help me lift him."

Chuck hurried to her side, thrusting his arms underneath Wisner's armpits while Sarah grabbed his legs and they hobbled towards the nearest door, appropriately labeled 'Broom Closet'. Chuck began babbling as they walked.

"Sarah! Oh my god, you just dropped a 250 pound security guard in, like, .5 seconds! What the hell? Have you always been able to do that?"

Sarah didn't answer right away, focusing her energies on stuffing Wisner's giant frame into the broom closet. She threw herself against the door to close it and then turned to face Chuck, blowing away a strand of hair that had fallen out of her ponytail and now dangled in front of her face. It fell back in front of her nose again and before Sarah could make a move to push it away, Chuck reached out, almost absentmindedly, and tucked the lock of hair behind her ear. Sarah felt like time had come to a standstill as Chuck's fingers dragged lightly across her temple. They curled around the shell of her ear, and then lingered against her cheek. The gentle touch sent gleeful shivers up and down her spine. It was then that Sarah realized she hadn't taken a breath since he'd reached out to touch her and the need for air pulled her back to reality. She reached up and grabbed his hand, pulling him down the hallway towards the elevator.

"Yes," she replied, trying to ignore the heat she could feel rising in her cheeks...again; it seemed particularly intense in the spots where Chuck's fingers had landed. "I've always been able to do that. I'm a spy, remember?"

"You could have killed me at any time out on that beach..." Chuck mumbled almost to himself. Sarah stopped abruptly and looked back at him when he said that. His brows were drawn, his lips tight, concern and ...was that fear, written all over his face. Readjusting her grip on his hand, Sarah threaded her fingers with his and shook her head fervently. "No, Chuck, that's not true. I would never hurt you."

The lines in Chuck's brow disappeared and although the smile he gave her was bittersweet, because they both realized the irony in that statement, it still made her heart flutter to see that grin again. Then Chuck cleared his throat and took his hand out of hers, shattering the tenderness of the moment. "Come on. We need to hurry."

They reached Roark's locked office without any further delays, just in time for Chuck to receive a call from Casey.

"Casey," Chuck hissed into the mouthpiece. "Where are you? We could really use some keys right about now."

"I'm on my way," Casey huffed back. "Stupid line was miles long. Had to get Greeves to cover for me. The whole team thinks I'm in the bathroom right now, so I don't have much time. How long is this going to take?"

"I have to find and then transfer Roark's files to a flash drive, Casey. It's not gonna be quick."

Casey grunted, muttering that he'd be there soon and then hung up. Chuck looked over at Sarah, who was fiddling with the lock but getting nowhere. She stood up and took a step back, glaring at the door as if she could intimidate it into swinging open. They both tensed when they heard footsteps echoing down the hall, relaxing once they saw that it was Casey rounding the corner, keys jingling in his hand. He slowed as he approached them, coming to a stop in front of Sarah and holding his hand out to her.

"Agent Walker. I've heard a lot about you." Sarah took Casey's hand hesitantly, glancing once at Chuck. She wasn't sure she liked the idea of being a hot topic of conversation, especially not after all that had happened between her and Chuck over the weekend.

"Good to meet you. Casey, was it?"

The tall guard grunted and nodded. "John Casey, formerly the Major of Company B for the United States Army. Served a short stint as an NSA agent too. Retired now."

"NSA and the military?" Sarah quirked a brow. "You've got an impressive background."

Casey smirked. "I could say the same thing about you. You're pretty young to be a field agent, aren't you?"

Sarah crossed her arms. "I don't think age has anything to do with an agent's capabilities."

Casey grunted in reply. "Anyway, it's probably more fitting that I'm here, seeing as this could be an actual risk to national security. It's not really a CIA agent's job to operate within our own borders now, is it?"

"Not really," Sarah agreed, shrugging a shoulder. "I suppose you could just call this a 'special situation'."

Casey chuckled and Chuck whipped his head around to gape at the stoic security guard. Casey didn't banter, and he certainly didn't laugh. He looked back at Chuck and jerked his chin towards Sarah. "I like her. She's spunky. You picked a good one, Bartowski."

"Can the teasing wait until after we've saved the free world, Casey?" Chuck sputtered, his ears turning bright red. Casey shook his head, muttering something under his breath, and pushed past both of them, picking a key from his gigantic key ring and pushing it into the lock on the door. As Casey fiddled with the lock, Chuck ventured a quick glance at Sarah and noticed that she had also developed a blush in her cheeks and ears, similar to the one he'd seen that morning in the coffee shop. Suddenly everything clicked into place. Amidst the tension of the situation, Chuck felt a warmth in his chest that he hadn't experienced since the night at the beach, before everything had gone sideways. Sarah could hide her true intentions and her emotions all she liked, Chuck thought, but the blush spoke for itself. Casey's comment had affected her just as much as it affected him. That had to mean something...Right?

However, before he could figure out something to say to Sarah, the door swung open and Casey ushered them through. Chuck bolted across the office towards Roark's computer, while Sarah began scanning through the stacks of paperwork that littered the room and the accompanying bookcases. Casey stood near the doorway, peering out every now and again to check for passersby.

"Crap," Chuck hissed suddenly, his hands stilling over Roark's keyboard.

"What is it?" Sarah asked, coming over to stand by his shoulder.

"His computer's password protected."

"Did you really think it wouldn't be?" Casey scoffed from the doorway. "Is this going to be a problem?"

"No." Chuck furrowed his brow and began typing rapidly on the keyboard again, his eyes flickering over the screen as box after box of text began popping up. "It's just going to take a little bit of finagling...Give me a second to brush the dust off of my Piranha alias and we'll be all set..."

"Wait, what did you say?" Sarah asked, turning her eyes away from the screen to watch Chuck instead. "Piranha?"

"Er, yeah," Chuck mumbled, somewhat embarrassed. "It was a nickname some of my tech buddies gave me back in college. I was a little bit of a...well, a hacker in my younger days. A good one too, if I do say so myself."

 _Yeah, that's putting it mildly_ , Sarah thought. She'd heard of Piranha. In fact, she'd picked up his name in conversation at the Agency amongst more of the tech focused agents. They spoke rather highly of him, even though his actions weren't entirely above board. But he'd never done anything to warrant further investigation. Sarah had never put much thought into who Piranha might be, it wasn't her job to investigate cyber crimes, but to know that it had been Chuck? To realize that, in a way, she'd known him, even before they'd met face to face...It was a little much to take in. Not only that, but if Chuck and Piranha were truly one and the same, then Chuck's intelligence went far beyond what he let on. Piranha was a name that garnered respect, amongst her fellow agents of all people, and Chuck wasn't even aware of it. But it made sense to her now. Chuck was an impressive guy, but too humble, too kind to even understand what he was capable of. It gave Sarah no small sense of pride to realize that Chuck was the one taking the lead on this mission, using his own natural abilities to save countless people today. Maybe Casey had been right, Sarah realized. She'd "picked a good one" too. If only she could find a way to tell him that. To tell him how she felt about him and about how proud she was of all he'd accomplished on his own.

"Got it," Chuck shouted suddenly, snapping her out of her thoughts. He frowned and glanced over his shoulder at Sarah, muttering, "Who would have guessed that his password was 'password'?"

"Seriously?"

"No..."Chuck offered a weak smile. "Sorry. Bad joke. Just trying to lighten the mood..." When neither Casey nor Sarah responded, Chuck cleared his throat nervously and turned back to the computer, cracking his knuckles before continuing to rifle through Roark's files.

"Hurry it up, Bartowski," Casey murmured, after a few more minutes of silence had passed.

"Hang on, almost there." Chuck's face grew dark when he located the compiled files that Roark had organized in a folder simply labeled 'Project Intersect'. "This is it. Wow...This is huge. There's a bunch of correspondences in here too. Fulcrum? What's Fulcrum?"

 _Fulcrum_ , Sarah mused. _Got him_. "Save those emails too, Chuck." Then she peered at the name of the folder. "What's 'Project Intersect'?" Sarah queried, reading the text over his shoulder. "What does that mean?

"No idea," Chuck said, taking the flash drive out of his pocket and connecting it to Roark's computer. "But we'll figure that out once we meet back up with Bryce. We just need these files to transfer and..."

Suddenly, Sarah's phone buzzed, shattering the quiet of the room and making all three of them jump. "It's Bryce," she informed them, accepting the call and putting the phone on speaker for everyone to hear.

"Sarah, are you still in Roark's office?" Bryce's voice was hushed.

"Yes, we found the files, we're just waiting for them to download-"

"You need to get out of there now," Bryce interrupted. "Roark is on his way up. He knows you're there."

"What?" Casey barked, craning his head out the door to peer down the hallway.

"You must have tripped a wire, in his office or on his computer, but he knows. He was in the middle of his presentation when an assistant came on stage and whispered something too him. Next thing I know, he's excusing himself from the presentation and bolting towards the elevators. You need to hurry. I'm going to try and corner him to buy you some time. But I can only distract him for so long. You have five minutes tops, Sarah." Bryce hung up without waiting for a reply, the last sound they heard from him was the pounding of his shoes on the tile floor as he ran to distract Roark.

"Damn it," Casey swore, pounding his fist against the door jamb. "Of course, he'd have some sort of personal security measure. Stupid of me not to consider the possibility. Speed it up, Chuck! "

Chuck looked panicked, his face pale and his brown eyes wide and round. "I can't make the files transfer any faster, Casey! We need a new plan."

Sarah looked around the room, searching desperately for an escape. But Roark's office was on the third floor. Even if they tried to escape through one of the windows, Chuck and Casey wouldn't be able to follow her down. There was nowhere big enough to hide in the office and besides that, Roark already knew someone had broken in, he wouldn't take a quick glance around and leave, he would find them. Barricading the door wouldn't do any good either, Roark undoubtedly had a key to his own office. Sarah met Casey's gaze, and at the same time the two of them realized that there was no other way to escape the building without a stand-off with Roark. She hadn't wanted the mission to come to violence, but she'd been granted permission to take Roark into custody by any means necessary. And she was prepared. Sarah reached into the small handbag she'd brought, pulling out her Smith & Wesson pistol, sliding the lock to make sure a round was chambered.

Casey's brows quirked when he saw it. "Nice."

Chuck, on the other hand, was not so impressed. "What? Sarah, is that a gun? You brought a gun? What are you going to do? Blow Roark's head off?"

"Chuck, relax," Sarah hissed, prowling to the door next to Casey and positioning herself across from him. "This is just a precaution."

"Okay, look, I realize I probably should have mentioned this before we got ourselves trapped in a possible terrorist's office, but I am really, _really_ not comfortable with the idea of guns. Or bullets. Also blood. So if you're planning on-" Chuck's mouth snapped shut when they heard the ding of the elevator from down the hall and the pounding of footsteps; multiple pairs of footsteps.

"We're out of time," Casey growled. "Chuck, get the files!"

Chuck, who was now worried that he might pass out before he could complete the file transfer, knelt in front of the computer again, tapping anxiously on the keyboard while the sound of footsteps grew louder. Just as Roark appeared in the doorway, Chuck shouted "Done!" and ejected the flash drive, leaping to his feet, only to cringe when he saw that Roark had arrived and that he was flanked by two of Casey's fellow security guards. The two men looked confused when they saw Casey, but trained their guns on him and Sarah anyway.

Calmly, Roark strode into the office, ignoring Casey and Sarah-who had her own gun focused on the security guards-coming to a stop in front of Chuck, shaking his head and clucking his tongue. "Charles...I should have known it was you. It's always the talented ones. I had high hopes for you, you know. I'm a little saddened right now, I really am."

Chuck clenched his fist around the flash drive slowly, his eyes flickering over Roark's shoulder to Sarah and then back again. "Project Intersect," he began breathlessly. "What is it?"

"That's none of your concern now," Roark replied with a perverse smile.

"Yes it is, I helped create it. What are you going to do with it?"

"I'm not doing anything with it," Roark corrected. "I'm selling it. That's what we do, Charles, remember? We build and sell technology."

"To who? Fulcrum? Who are they?"

Roark just smirked and shook his head. "You could have been a part of something great."

"Theodore Roark, we know that you're working for the terrorist cell known as Fulcrum. We have proof of your business dealing with them and we have your project files. It's over, Roark, we're taking you into custody," Sarah said, taking a step towards Roark and Chuck. The two guards took a step with her and Sarah was forced to face them again.

"Put your guns down, boys," Casey growled at them. "You two don't know who it is you've been working for."

"Actually John," one of the men said in a bitter voice. "You're the one who doesn't know who he's been working _with_." Casey frowned, a low growl rumbling in his chest. It took Sarah a second longer to connect the dots. Roark had Fulcrum agents posing as his own security guards. Sarah raised her gun, realizing she no longer had any qualms about putting a bullet into each of them if they did work for Fulcrum.

Roark looked over his shoulder at Casey and Sarah and then turned back to Chuck with a grin. "You brought some friends. Law enforcement, I presume? And my very own head of security. The duplicity runs deep, it would seem." He chuckled and strode around the room to Chuck's side, opening the top drawer of his desk and reaching inside. "Unfortunately, Charles, this is not going to end with you walking out a hero." In a movement far quicker than what Sarah expected from a man as old as Roark, he'd taken Chuck into a choke hold, simultaneously pulling a pistol from his drawer and holding it against Chuck's temple. Sarah moved at the same time, her gun now raised and pointed at Roark, but with Chuck's head so close to Roark's, Sarah found that she was paralyzed. She couldn't make a move. Casey stood at her shoulder, the muscles in his neck straining as he snarled at Roark. "Let him go."

"Give me the flash drive and I won't ruin this poor boy's face." Chuck gulped, his terrified gaze flicking between Casey and Sarah. His hands were shaking, but still, he kept his fist closed tightly around the drive, his knuckles turning white. Sarah didn't know where Bryce had gone, if he'd been subdued by Roark's security or by Roark himself, but she wished more than ever that her partner would appear in the doorway and end the standoff. No such luck.

Roark rolled his eyes and thumbed the hammer on his pistol, pressing it even harder against Chuck's temple. The sound sent a shock of fear through Sarah's body and still she made no move to shoot. It was too risky, her hands were trembling. If she missed and hit Chuck...Then again, if she didn't shoot and Roark did...

"Alright, enough," Casey said suddenly, drawing everyone's attention. "Walker, put down your gun." Sarah looked at him, completely unsure of his plan but sure that he had something. He had to. Because she was out of ideas. Casting one more furtive glance at Chuck and Roark, Sarah slowly lay her gun on the ground, nudging it with her toe towards one of the Fulcrum guards. Then Casey nodded to Chuck. "Give him the drive, Chuck."

Chuck's face twisted in confusion. "What?"

"Do it, Chuck," Casey ordered. "Give him the drive."

Chuck looked at Sarah, but all she could do was nod as if she knew what Casey's plan was; when in reality, she was just as lost as he was. Slowly, Chuck unfurled his hand and lifted it to Roark's fist that was still locked around his neck. Just before the room erupted into chaos, Sarah saw something flash in Chuck's eyes, his mouth suddenly set in a grim, determined line. As soon as the drive was close enough for Roark to grab, Chuck tipped his palm just slightly, and the device slipped out of his hand and onto the floor. Roark lurched for it instinctively, his grip around Chuck's neck loosening and in that split second, Chuck took his chance. He threw an elbow backwards into Roark's gut and squirmed out of his grasp, scrambling for purchase across the slick floor, as he struggled to get some distance between himself and the now furious Roark.

At the same moment, Casey turned on one of the Fulcrum agents while Sarah took the other, who had knelt to grab her gun. She jammed her knee up into his nose, twice, sending him hurtling to the floor, his gun tumbling in the opposite direction. Sarah scrambled for it, pulling back the hammer and twisting at the hip to aim for Roark before he could take Chuck hostage again. Roark was aiming at Chuck, his finger twitching towards the trigger, but Casey was faster. He raised his pistol and the resulting bang made Sarah and Chuck flinch away as Roark fell to the ground, his gun hand completely ruined and dripping blood. The man shouted, clutching his injured hand to his chest and dropping the flash drive in the process, which Sarah scooped up immediately before running to Chuck's side.

He was shaken, his mouth agape, his eyes wide, face pale and a few specks of blood from Roark's hand dotting his cheek, but he was unhurt. Sarah made sure of that, running her fingers across his temple and then through his hair, before grasping his face between her hands and bringing his eyes to her."Chuck, look at me, are you alright?"

He nodded, taking a gulp of air before trying to speak. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I just can't really hear anything right now...Guns are loud."

Casey was crouched over Roark, pinning him with one knee and binding his hands with the security cuffs dangling from his belt. Sarah helped Chuck to his feet, keeping one arm around his waist to support his weight since Chuck's legs didn't seem to want to comply.

"Casey," Chuck gasped, his voice filled with awe. "You saved me."

Casey looked over his shoulder and grunted, "Don't mention it."

"That shot though...That was amazing."

"Told you I spent my life in the military. Used to be the best sniper in my unit," Casey said, jerking Roark to his feet and ignoring the man's cry of pain. "Spending my weekends at the gun range doesn't hurt either."

It was at that moment that Bryce chose to appear, blood trickling from his nose and a dark bruise forming on his left cheekbone. "I heard a shot," he said, looking at each of them in turn. "What happened?"

"Roark," Sarah said, jerking her chin towards Casey, who was pushing Roark to the doorway, one hand braced between his shoulders while the other kept a grip on the man's wrists. "It's over."

 **o-o-o-o**

Bryce called in the FBI as soon as they'd made their way out of the convention, and soon the place was swarming with armed officers, confused patrons and shouting onlookers. They hadn't exactly completed their mission covertly, but it was over nonetheless, and Roark was in custody with the evidence to keep him behind bars for a long time. There were logistics to take care of and Sarah's head began to spin as she spoke to officer after officer, Bryce doing the same thing at her side. Casey stood on the sidelines as soon as Roark had been taken off his hands, supporting Chuck, who still looked bewildered and a little bit green. At some point, they were approached by a tall, sharp eyed officer who seemed to be in charge of the entire operation.

"Agents Walker and Larkin, I presume?" he asked, offering his hand to each of them in turn. "I am Special Agent Steven Mullens. I've just recently contacted your superior, Langston Graham. I assume you have as well?"

Sarah looked at Bryce who was nodding, but amidst the chaos, Sarah realized that she hadn't even thought to contact Graham regarding the results of the mission. "Graham is aware of the situation. He's given me orders to have the building searched and any technology confiscated for further investigation."

Mullens nodded and signaled to the men and women gathered behind him, who then entered the building one by one, while others continued ushering panicked convention goers out. Chuck, from where he stood with Casey nearby, took an unsteady step forward to join the conversation.

"Excuse me?" Mullens turned around to look at him, his eyebrows rising when he took note of Chuck's disheveled appearance. "My laptop, my work, is still inside the building. If I could just get a hold of it before everything's taken..."

"Not going to happen, Bartowski," Bryce interrupted, stepping forward. "Your laptop is part of a crime scene now. It's evidence. And it's going to our superiors. You can have it back if and when they decide to clear it."

Chuck's mouth fell open and his brow furrowed over darkened eyes. "You can't be serious. I just helped you guys capture Roark! There's nothing on my laptop. I'm not a part of this, and you know it!"

"Then you don't need to worry about us searching the hard drive," Bryce retorted easily.

"I'm sorry, sir," Mullens added, taking a step away from the confrontation to rejoin his unit. "But I have my orders to clear the building. No exceptions."

"I can't believe you're doing this! I helped you!" Chuck took a shaky step forward, nearly stumbling over himself in his exhaustion, but Casey was there to help hoist him up before Sarah could make a move.

"You heard the agent," Bryce replied with a shrug. "No exceptions." With that Bryce turned on his heel to finish speaking with the other FBI agents, leaving Chuck to gawk after him, his face burning red. Sarah was just as furious, but she would deal with Bryce later. For now, she needed to make sure Chuck got home safe.

"Chuck," she said softly, drawing his attention. He turned his angry gaze on her, as if she were the one that had told him he couldn't have his laptop back. "I'll take care of this, okay? I promise. Get home, get some rest. Casey, can you make sure he gets back to Echo Park safely?"

Casey nodded, patting Chuck's shoulder and gripping it firmly at the same time to guide him away. Chuck followed without resisting, but he kept his eyes on Sarah, silently begging her to explain what in the hell was going on. She waited until he was lost amongst the crowd before letting her shoulders sag and the confidence fade from her visage. She was exhausted and furious and confused. They'd completed their mission but somehow everything still seemed wrong. Taking out her cell phone, Sarah decided the best course of action would be to put in a call to Graham himself. He answered on the third ring and Sarah explained her stance on the situation as quickly as she could.

When she'd explained the events of the past few hours, she paused to catch her breath before continuing. "Director, I understand the precautions you're taking here. Roark Instruments is full of dangerous technology, but Chuck Bartowski's personal items are inside. I need your permission to retrieve them. There's nothing on there that needs to be searched, I can promise you that."

Graham paused and when he finally responded, Sarah heard confusion in his tone. "Agent Larkin led me to believe that Chuck was working on something that even Roark wasn't aware of. He insisted that we needed to make sure Bartowski isn't a threat."

Sarah was speechless, the rage she felt towards her partner beginning to come to a boil in her gut. "Sir, I don't understand why Agent Larkin thinks he has the right to accuse Chuck of any wrongdoing. Chuck put himself in very real danger to help us. May I remind you, sir, that he's a civilian. In fact, I'd venture to say that any misgivings Agent Larkin has towards Chuck are entirely personal."

"Oh?" Graham sounded interested now.

"Yes. More than once, Bryce nearly came to blows with Chuck over inconsequential argument. I've seen the so called 'personal files' Chuck keeps on his laptop, sir." It wasn't entirely true, but Sarah knew she had more proof of that than any lie Bryce could come up with to throw Chuck under the bus. "Chuck is entirely innocent. He deserves the right to walk away from this without any consequences. You've done a background check on him, Director. And I vouch for Chuck personally. Please, he doesn't want accolades, he doesn't want a reward. Just give him his things back and let him forget this ever happened."

Director Graham was silent for a long while. "Are you accusing Agent Larkin of lying for his own benefit?"

"That's exactly what I'm accusing him of," Sarah replied. "Agent Larkin has done nothing but try to complete this mission for personal gain, and Chuck was in the way of that. From the moment we landed in Burbank, every decision he's made has been for his own benefit. Whenever we disagreed, he insisted on doing things his way, which more than once made the mission more complicated. Bryce never cared about taking Roark down for any other reason than to bolster his own reputation."

"That's a serious allegation, Agent Walker." Sarah didn't reply, she simply waited for Graham to make his decision.

"Very well," he said finally. "We'll discuss the finer details of Agent Larkin's participation in this mission when you both return to Langley. In the meantime, yes, Chuck Bartowski may have his personal effects back without examination."

"Thank you." Sarah felt relief sweep through her, replacing the anger she felt towards her partner.

"I expect you both back as soon as possible. Finish with Roark and Bartowski and get back to headquarters. Understood?"

"Yes, sir." The conversation was over after that. But Sarah still had a few loose ends to deal with; one in particular. Bryce Larkin.

 **o-o-o-o**

Bryce beat Sarah back to the Maison23 apartments, he was in the process of packing his things when she came storming through the front door, fury flashing in her blue eyes.

"You son of a bitch," she growled, slamming the door shut behind her and continuing towards him.

Bryce turned around to face her, muttering," "What are you-"

The punch was too fast, it hit Bryce like a bolt of lightning, landing on the bruise he'd gotten earlier from one of Roark's security guards, sending a shock of pain radiating through his face. The power of her blow sent Bryce stumbling. He raised a hand to his cheek, touching it tenderly before rounding on Sarah. "Walker, what the fu-"

Another blow, this time flush against his stomach, just above his groin. He doubled over, groaning, his hands on his stomach, making sure to take a few steps away from her in a desperate attempt to defend himself.

"You asshole," she snapped, her voice low and threatening. "Why the hell did you tell Graham that you suspected Chuck of being a part of something illegal? He helped us. He risked his life for our mission. Where in the world do you get off telling Graham that he did anything wrong?"

Bryce was still gasping for air, and struggling to rise to his full height. When he spoke, it was through gritted teeth. "Not all of us are as wet for Bartowski as you are, Walker. He worked for Roark, so he's a suspect."

"This has nothing to do with my feelings for Chuck, this is about you going back on your word and-"

"So you admit you have feelings for the nerd?" Bryce interrupted, a smug grin tugging on his lips. He should have expected the blow that came after that; the resounding slap hit him in the same cheek and he stumbled again, shaking his head to clear the stars dancing in front of his eyes.

"Chuck helped us. Graham knows that your accusations are completely unwarranted." She spat each word at him, backing towards the door as she spoke. "This mission is over Bryce, as is our partnership. Finish packing your things and get the hell back to headquarters." Then Sarah left, slamming the door behind her and leaving Bryce to nurse his injured pride.

 _My feelings for Chuck_. Sarah's own words echoed in her head as she slumped against the closed door, listening to Bryce's muffled curses on the other side. She'd been so worked up that she'd openly admitted, to Bryce Larkin of all people, that she did indeed have feelings for Chuck Bartowski. It wasn't as if she hadn't known that for quite some time, but saying the words out loud made it seem so much more real. It wasn't as easy to deny now, it wasn't as if she could take the words back and hide them again somewhere deep inside herself. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, attempting to center herself and stop the adrenaline-induced tremors running through her body. So she had feelings for Chuck, confusing, unfamiliar and...wonderful feelings. And even though she'd admitted them to Bryce, and to herself, Sarah quickly realized that she would never be able to reveal them to Chuck. There was no way an admission would bring anything but more pain. She was leaving for Langley soon, she would leave Chuck behind, walk out of his life without a trace, just like he'd wanted. Revealing her feelings would only make things harder for both of them. Chuck deserved happiness, he deserved a life that wasn't dictated by lies and secrets, and that was a world that Sarah couldn't give him. The feelings would stay locked inside, Sarah decided. Yet another secret that she would have to keep locked away.

For as hard as Sarah was fighting to rein in her emotions, the tightness in her chest was nearly suffocating. She needed to keep moving, set herself a goal, or else she would drown in the feelings that threatened to overwhelm her. Pushing herself away from the door, Sarah hurried down the hall towards the elevator. She still needed to retrieve Chuck's laptop, and even with Graham's authorization, Sarah knew it wasn't going to be a walk in the park. She still had Agent Mullens and the FBI red tape to deal with after all. She just hoped that she would be able to pull through and do one good thing for Chuck. One good deed for this man who had changed her life so suddenly, with no lies, or covers skewing her motives. If she could do that, then she could walk away with a clear conscience, leave Chuck Bartowski behind and finally return to the life she'd always known.

* * *

 _There we have it. I wish I could promise that the next update will be out just as quick as this one was but that wouldn't be a fair promise to make. Thank you all for taking the time to read and I appreciate any thoughts or comments you care to share. RobM, Tut, uplink, wvonb, wilf, sevenrez, willynilly, sram15, all the guests, juan. Roger, michaelfmx, Neale, Mufc87, Carmichael Jr, Ken, gombek69,Deathzbreath, audecaanwrites, tshdow, fezzywhigg, charahkids, SK, boxerman, I've gotten this far because of all of you. Thanks._


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: Welcome back. We are rapidly approaching the finish line folks and it's been quite a race. Once again, I want to thank everyone who is reading, reviewing or simply enjoying this story. Both **michaelfmx** (the illustrious beta of this fic) and myself have put quite a bit of work into this story and hearing your feedback is absolutely worth every bit of it._

 _I will say this before getting into the chapter. This story is a Charah one. A rocky road, to be certain, and the contents of this chapter may not seem to reassuring. But it's all planned out, I can promise you that. Hang in there._

 _Without further adieu! Onward to the chapter..._

* * *

 **February 15th, 2009: Echo Park, CA, 1300 Hours:**

Chuck had just barely hobbled into Echo Park when he was besieged by his sister and Captain Awesome, both still dressed in their work scrubs.

"Chuck, oh my god!" Ellie shouted, throwing her arms around his neck, ignoring the cry of pain he emitted when she did. "Are you alright? We saw what happened at the convention on the news and hurried home as soon as we could. Are you hurt?" She reached up with shaky fingers, following the trail of dried blood on his face. Chuck moved her hand away and shook his head. "Don't worry. It's not mine."

"He's fine," Casey explained, shoving Chuck upwards so that he was standing on his own, albeit on slightly unsteady legs. "Just a little shaken up."

"Thank you..."Ellie trailed off, waiting for Casey to introduce himself. But he never did, he just grunted and nodded. "Um..Chuck, what happened with Roark? The news reporters were calling him a terrorist."

"It's... a long story," Chuck sighed, suddenly feeling like his body weighed a thousand pounds. "And it all starts with Sarah."

Ellie's jaw dropped and even Devon looked taken aback by Chuck's announcement. Gently, Ellie put an arm around her brother's waist, helping him into his apartment with another grateful glance back at Casey, who was lumbering after them even without an invitation. "Come on, let's get you inside. I want to hear everything. Start at the very beginning."

Chuck took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a moment, and began telling Ellie everything that had happened since Sarah had arrived back in town.

 **o-o-o-o**

"Sarah's a _what_?" Chuck flinched as Ellie's voice not only rose three octaves, but also several decibels, the sound nearly splitting his eardrums. Casey, who had taken a seat next to Chuck on the couch with Devon, seemed unaffected by Ellie's outburst. He took a calm sip of the water she'd offered him and leaned back against the couch while Ellie began pacing around the living room.

"An agent, El. She's a spy for the CIA," Chuck offered, hesitant to add fuel to the flame that was his outraged sister. "You know, like the ones on TV that kick serious ass and get into car chases….." Chuck trailed off as his sister glowered at him.

"Awesome," Devon grinned, clapping Chuck on the shoulder.

"No, Devon!" Ellie shouted. "Not awesome. This is the exact opposite of awesome. This is awful...Chuck, are you telling me that she's been lying to us about who she is? This whole time?"

Chuck didn't reply right away. He hefted a huge sigh and smiled wanly at his sister. "I'm sorry, Ellie."

Ellie shook her head, running a hand over her face and then planting both hands on her hips, chewing on her lip thoughtfully. "You're not the one who should be apologizing, Chuck," she said. "Sarah is the one that lied to you...to all of us. I can't believe it." Ellie's angry expression faltered for a moment and her eyes grew glassy, her lips quivering slightly. "I really trusted her."

"She's good at her job," Casey murmured with a shrug. Ellie's angry gaze snapped towards him and for a moment, Chuck thought that his sister might actually slap John Casey right across the face.

"And she asked you to be a part of this mission? Was your safety ever a concern? Did she even care what would happen to me, or Devon...or Morgan, if we lost you?" Ellie started pacing around the dining table, her hands flying wildly above her head as she gestured. "And what about her whole fake relationship with Bryce? Was she just toying with you so that she could get the information she needed? Everything I saw on the beach..."

"I was never in any danger, Ellie," Chuck lied, ignoring her questions regarding Sarah's feelings for him. He had no answer for his sister because he was just as confused about Sarah's true intentions. "And I agreed to go on the mission on my own terms."

"Oh really?" Ellie scoffed, crossing her arms. "Never in any danger, huh? You still haven't explained the blood stains you came home with."

"It was Roark's," Chuck tried to explain. "Casey took a shot at him and I was too close-"

"There were guns involved in this too?" Ellie interrupted, going from angry to livid in the blink of an eye. "You were nearly shot?" She turned her fierce glare on Casey, who still appeared completely unperturbed.

"Walker made it pretty clear that Chuck's safety was her priority," Casey offered. Chuck and Devon turned to look at him simultaneously, but Casey didn't explain any further, he simply leaned back against the couch and sipped at his water again. Ellie, on the other hand, was still thoroughly unconvinced.

"That doesn't make any sense," She frowned. " _Sarah_ doesn't make any sense. This is ridiculous, I'm going to go talk to her and get answers myself!"

"Ellie, no!" Chuck bolted for the door, throwing himself in front of it to prevent Ellie from leaving the apartment. She stood only inches away from him, her hands planted on her hips and her eyes burning into his. Chuck gulped audibly, a bead of sweat suddenly rolling down his temple. His sister could be terrifyingly fierce when she wanted to; nevertheless he held his ground.

"Charles Irving Bartowski, you move out of my way this instant."

"It's not worth it. She's leaving, Ellie. She and Bryce both agreed to leave and let us forget this ever happened. Let's just leave it alone, okay?"

"No," Ellie argued, shoving Chuck's hand aside and reaching for the doorknob. "There's no way I'm letting her off the hook. Chuck, you could have died today. And everything she did on the beach...to use you? All of us? Let me out."

Chuck moved Ellie's hand away, gripped her shoulders and walked her a few steps away from the door. "Ellie...Calm down. This isn't worth it."

"Yes, it is!"

Devon was on his feet now, as was Casey-who looked more than a little amused by the proceedings-and both descended on the dueling siblings. Devon took Ellie's arms gently, keeping his voice low and soothing as he said, "Alright, babe, remember what we learned in last week's yoga sesh? Take a few deep, cleansing breaths, all the way down to your diaphragm, ready? In...and-"

"Devon, let me go or I swear-"

"Ellie," Chuck drew his sister's attention away from Devon before she caused him physical harm. "Let it go." The finality in his tone stopped Ellie in her tracks. She looked at him quizzically, concern twisting her features and making Chuck's heart ache. His sister had always been the one to believe in him, support him, take care of him, ever since their parents had left the picture. He knew that she was hurt on his behalf, as well as her own, but starting a war with Sarah wouldn't do either of them any good. As much as he appreciated how hard his sister wanted to fight for him, he wanted to end things peacefully. "Please Ellie. Let it go. I have."

Ellie looked ready to argue again, but then she closed her eyes and sighed, slumping back against Devon, who almost immediately gathered her up in a comforting hug that doubled as a hold she wouldn't easily be able to squeeze out of should she suddenly decide to bolt for the door again. "Alright."

Chuck grinned at her, reaching out and squeezing her hand to let her know that he appreciated where she was coming from. Devon suggested that he and Ellie go for a run to blow off some steam, and she was almost too eager to comply. While the two retreated to their room to grab their running gear, Casey approached Chuck.

"You did good today," he said. "You did a lot of things a lesser man wouldn't have had the guts to do." Chuck couldn't do more than gape at Casey, he hadn't expected such high praise from the normally stoic man. "Nice work, Bartowski. Proud of you."

Casey clapped a still speechless Chuck on the shoulder and nodded once. He pushed the door open and stepped into the courtyard, but paused suddenly, turning around and adding, "For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure Walker's proud of you too." Then Casey closed the door, leaving the words to echo in Chuck's ears even long after he'd gone.

 **February 17th, 2009: Echo Park, CA: 1700 hours**

It took two very long days, but Sarah had finally managed to get her hands on Chuck's laptop. She'd wanted to give him time to recuperate before showing up at his door again. But considering the fact that her flight left in only a few short hours, she couldn't wait any longer. Sarah strode into Echo Park with her chin held high and Chuck's laptop tucked safely underneath her arm. She only had a few minutes before needed to get back to the apartment and pack her things before heading to the airport, but with luck she could leave the computer with Chuck and hurry out of the apartment complex before he began bombarding her with questions. Sarah hoped that he would still be too angry with her to care about getting answers. Maybe that would make it easier for her to find the strength to walk out of his life. For good this time.

Sarah raised her fist, rapping lightly on Chuck's apartment door. But when it swung open, it was not Chuck who stood on the other side waiting to greet her. It was Ellie, and she did not look pleased to see Sarah, whose fist was still suspended in mid-air.

"Sarah," Ellie said curtly, her dark brows furrowing over hazel eyes. "What are you doing here?"

Sarah hesitated, a little disarmed by Ellie's hostility and then she held the laptop out, offering it to Chuck's older sister with both hands. "I just wanted to bring this by. The... officers... investigating the scene wanted to confiscate everything inside Roark Instruments, but I managed to get my hands on this before they could take it."

That wasn't the whole story. Obtaining Chuck's laptop had taken a lot more effort than Sarah thought it would. But Ellie didn't need to know all of the details. Her face softened slightly as she reached out to take the laptop from Sarah. She cradled it against her chest, holding it up between them like a makeshift shield. Ellie nibbled on her lip for a moment and a tense silence falling over the two women. Before Sarah could make an attempt to speak Ellie snapped.

"Chuck told me everything." Sarah just blinked. She knew her cover would probably crumble after Roark's arrest had been publicized on the news, and in all honesty, she'd never really expected Chuck to keep the secret from his very own sister. "He told me you're a spy and that you lied to us and that all of this was just so that you could arrest Ted Roark. Is that true?"

Sarah had trouble meeting Ellie's eyes, they were wide and round, filled with what Sarah thought might be desperation. As if Ellie was silently begging her to tell her that Chuck was wrong. But Sarah couldn't see the point in lying about it anymore. None of her training had prepared her for a situation like this. She was leaving in a few short hours, and just like Chuck, Ellie deserved the truth. Without a word, Sarah reached into her jacket pocket and held out her I.D. badge for Ellie to see. Ellie's shoulders slumped as she looked at the badge, and then her brow furrowed again and her lips thinned and she glared back up at Sarah. "Are you leaving?"

"Yes, I'm being reassigned. They don't need me in Burbank now that...Well, now that Roark's been taken care of." Sarah offered Ellie a tight smile, but it wasn't returned. Instead, Ellie looked down at her shoes and scuffled her feet. Sarah was about to say her goodbyes when suddenly Ellie's chin snapped up again and she pinned Sarah in place with an incensed glare.

"He really cares about you, you know. Chuck believed that you cared about him too. About all of us." Ellie's voice was strained. "I know it's your job. I know you're a spy. But...I never imagined that you'd break my brother's heart the way you did. And after everything you did for him, Sarah. I thought you were more than just another disaster waiting to happen."

Sarah couldn't reply. She just gaped at Ellie, unable and unwilling to defend herself against the barrage of accusations, because what could she really say to assuage Chuck's sister? She _had_ lied to all of them. She _had_ taken advantage of their generosity and kindness. They had every right to hate her, to never want to see her again, and she knew it. And of course Ellie knew about the cover now. There was no way she could have expected Chuck to keep such an enormous secret from his family. Not that it seemed to help explain away her actions; Ellie still looked furious.

"Ellie, I'm sorry." It was all Sarah could think to say, and even then, she knew it wouldn't be enough. Ellie was just like her brother, she wanted answers, specifics, reasons that Sarah couldn't give. Sorry could not even begin to heal the wounds Sarah had inflicted. "It's more complicated than that. But I never meant to hurt you. Or Chuck. Please believe that."

Ellie sighed and closed her eyes, apparently resigning herself to the fact she would get nothing more from Sarah. Turning around and heading into the apartment, she disappeared into the living room for a moment or two before returning to the doorway and holding out a small piece of paper.

"Here," she said, gesturing for Sarah to take it. "I don't know where you're going or what you'll be doing after you leave Burbank, but I think you should take this with you."

Sarah took the piece of paper, turning it over to get a better look and realizing that it wasn't paper, but a photograph. One Ellie must have taken on the beach. It showed her and Chuck strolling along the sand, carrying their surfboards underneath their arms and beaming at one other, as if neither of them had a care in the world.

"When did you..." Sarah trailed off. It didn't really matter when or why Ellie had taken the picture. She'd managed to capture Sarah in a moment of unadulterated bliss; and the picture quite clearly showed that Chuck was the reason behind that happiness. That day at the beach was one of the many moments with Chuck that she could see with amazing clarity every time she closed her eyes.

"Please keep it," Ellie said, her expression not quite as conflicted now. "I want you to have it. If nothing else, consider it a reminder of what you had here."

Sarah was no fool. The picture was both a gift and a final blow from the woman she'd genuinely come to care for and trust. The picture captured something very real; something Sarah couldn't deny and Ellie knew that. Sarah looked up from the picture, wishing she could tell Ellie everything she felt for her stupid, aggravating, heart wrenching brother, but the words wouldn't come. And Ellie was already closing the door anyway.

"Goodbye Sarah," she said, and then the lock clicked into place and Sarah was left standing alone in the middle of the empty apartment complex, still gripping the picture tightly between her fingers.

"Goodbye," Sarah murmured, her voice sounding small and faraway as it floated into the empty air. Turning on her heel, Sarah tucked the photo into her back pocket and slowly made her way towards the street entrance of the complex.

She needed to get back to Maison23 and finish packing, she just had to hold herself together until she was inside the room and then she would let herself crumble. Just a few more minutes...Sarah was so focused on her own feet that she didn't realize someone was in front of her until she bumped into them, nearly tripping as she tried to collect herself. A pair of large hands gripped her arms to keep her upright. Sarah didn't have to look up to know who it was. She almost allowed herself to fall forward into the awkward embrace, to let her forehead rest against the dip of his collar. Instead, she straightened on her own, tilting her chin back to gain some distance and when she did, she found herself inches away from Chuck's face, his bright amber eyes locked on her own. The moment was all too familiar. She could perfectly picture the same moment they'd shared on the beach a week ago. Once again, she was close enough to count his lashes, to touch her lips to the tip of his chin if she just leaned forward a little more. Sarah felt the burning starting in her cheeks and she took a step back, clearing her throat as she did and earning a wan smile from Chuck. Damn it with his ability to make her blush almost on command.

Sarah noticed how close they were to the fountain in the center of the complex where they'd had their first kiss all those months ago. Chuck must have noticed too because he kept his distance now, standing just close enough to speak comfortably, but far enough to avoid accidentally touching her. It was a stance Sarah had mastered a long time ago to keep people out, control how close they got to her physically and emotionally. She'd never expected to see it from Chuck and it hurt to know that he wanted to keep her at a distance, even though she couldn't really fault his reasons. One more reminder of how deeply she had damaged her relationship with Chuck.

"You're leaving?" he asked, tucking his hands into his pockets to keep from fiddling with them.

"Yeah, I have to get back to my apartment and finish packing for my flight," she said, noting the way he kept glancing around the complex, as if he couldn't stand to look her in the eye for more than a moment or two.

"Where will you go?" His voice was soft, almost hesitant.

"Back to headquarters for now and then I'm not really sure. They could send me anywhere in the world. I won't know where I'm going until they give me a mission briefing."

"Anywhere in the world." Chuck's eyes roamed her face and then fell to the ground. "I see."

Sarah didn't reply. He wasn't asking the questions she thought he might, in fact he seemed to be stalling. Maybe for no other reason than to speak with her one last time.

"Thank you," he said suddenly, his eyes snapping up to hers again. "For bringing me my laptop. I thought it was gone for good."

"You don't have to thank me. I didn't want you to lose all that work you did for your game." Chuck's brow furrowed as if he were confused. "Your project has a lot of potential, Chuck. And more importantly, you have what it takes to see it through. I really believe that." Sarah tried for a smile, but she was certain it came out more as a grimace. She couldn't help it though, her mask was slipping, her chest aching more with every second that passed.

Chuck's brows drew together even further, but this time his expression was tight, almost pained. "Sarah, can I asked you something before you go? Just once. For the record."

Sarah waited, feeling her heartbeat quicken in her chest.

"Can you tell me if any of it was real? Past the cover, past the lies, past the mission...Did you ever really care about me?"

Even though she thought she was prepared for Chuck to ask her this question, she realized that she still had no answer. Chuck had given her back a piece of herself she thought she'd lost a long time ago; her humanity. And he'd done it long before she'd been assigned to the mission in Burbank though. He'd changed her life in only a few hours the first time they'd ever crossed paths. How was she supposed to explain the magnitude of that meeting? How could she make him understand?

What good would the truth do for either of them now that she was being reassigned? Wouldn't it just hurt more for him to know that yes, it had been real, but it could never be anything more? And what would it do to her to admit that what she'd felt for Chuck Bartowski was something she'd never experienced before? And that it was something she was loathe to let go of? Chuck was still staring at her, waiting with baited breath for her reply, and as Sarah looked up into his eyes, she came to the realization that there was no point in holding back anymore. After all she'd put him through over the past few weeks, he deserved the simple truth. And then she could let go. Taking a deep breath, Sarah steeled her nerves, gathered her courage and uttered one word, "Yes."

To her surprise, that was all it took for the tension to ease from Chuck face and shoulders. He ducked his chin to his chest just once, in a jerky sort of nod. "Okay. For me too. But you already knew that."

Sarah chuckled in spite of herself and Chuck's tiny smile grew into a full grin, one that didn't quite reach his eyes but was still bright enough to bring a smile to Sarah's face as well.

"So, I guess we say goodbye now?" Chuck asked after they'd both sobered again. Sarah nodded. It was a real goodbye this time. There would be no coming back to Burbank, no hoping that she'd see him again one day, maybe running his own company, or sharing his game with the world. As much as she wanted to believe otherwise, as soon as she left Echo Park, she would never see Chuck Bartowski again. And it hurt more than she could possibly explain to even think that. After all he'd done for her, it didn't seem right to let him become nothing more than a fond memory. But was else could she do?

"Chuck." She hesitated for a moment, still unsure if she wanted to say this, but deciding that he deserved to hear it. "You've told me that meeting me changed your life, put you on a path to doing something with your talents. I want you to know that...meeting you and your family...has made a difference for me too. Being here in Burbank, with you, Ellie, Devon, even Morgan. It...changed me. _You've_ changed me."

She saw the strain in Chuck's expression, the way his lips parted as he prepared to respond. Almost certainly to ask her to stay. So she continued quickly before he could.

"I won't forget that. I won't forget you." Fighting the burning lump in her throat, Sarah met his eyes one last time and murmured a soft, "Goodbye Chuck."

"Goodbye Sarah," he replied, no longer bothering to keep his emotions in check. He attempted a weak smile that faltered when his chin began to tremble. "Take care of yourself."

"You too," Sarah whispered, and with that, it was time to leave Chuck behind. Without another word, Sarah turned and strode past the fountain and out of the apartment complex, knowing that she'd hurt him again, knowing that he was watching her go with that horribly heart wrenching expression twisting his features. But she couldn't look back now, she had made her decision, and ultimately, she knew it was what was best for both of them.

Chuck watched her go until she disappeared underneath the archway, leaving him alone, the same way she'd left so suddenly the first time they'd ever met. Chuck almost wanted to hate her as he watched her go without so much as a backwards glance. But he knew he never could. He cared about her too much, he'd always be too grateful for what she'd done for him. There was no way he could ever hate Sarah, no matter how much it pained him to see her leave again. Because no matter what happened after today, whether he ever say her again, she had changed him at his core, for the better. And he could never forget that about her.

Turning on his heel, Chuck trudged back into his apartment, where Ellie was waiting for him, chewing on her lip nervously. Chuck didn't say anything, but Ellie didn't need him to, their eyes met and she opened her arms to him. Chuck stepped into her embrace, letting his emotions out in one, long shuddering breath. He squeezed his sister tightly, grateful for her silent support as she rubbed his back comfortingly.

"She's gone."

"I know...It'll be okay, Chuck," she mumbled against his shoulder. " _You'll_ be okay." Chuck took another steadying breath and pulled away from his sister's embrace, moving to the couch to pick up his laptop.

"You don't have to hang around, El," he murmured, tucking the computer underneath his arm. "I'm gonna do some work on this and start looking for another job." He shrugged one shoulder to indicate the laptop. "Maybe Morgan can put in a good word for me back at the Buy More."

Ellie frowned. "You're going back to the Buy More?"

"For a little bit," Chuck replied. "I can't just sit around waiting for another opportunity to fall into my lap. Don't worry, sis. This won't be another '5-year-plan' excuse. I'm not the same guy I was back then." He sighed as he thought about the catalyst for that change and wondered how long it would be before he could think of his computer game and not think about Sarah.

"No, you're certainly not," Ellie agreed. "And you're right, the Buy More will be something to...focus on until you figure out what to do next."

"I think I have an idea or two," Chuck replied, patting his laptop. Only then did he realize that Ellie wasn't aware of his game. Morgan was the only one he'd confided in before Sarah, but now it was his only prospect for success outside of the Buy More. As soon as he had something more impressive than codes to show his sister, he'd let her in on his plan to develop his own game and, with luck, his very own company. "You can head home, Ellie. I'll be alright.

"Are you sure? I can stay, Chuck. Really, it's not a problem. Devon's stuck at the hospital for a few more hours, so he won't mind if I'm not home."

Chuck shook his head. "S'alright. I really appreciate it Ellie, but I think I'd like some time to myself. After everything that's happened in the last few days, I just need to decompress."

"Alright," Ellie agreed hesitantly. "But I'm just across the courtyard if you need anything okay? Anything at all."

"I know." Chuck smiled as Ellie leaned up to kiss him on the cheek.

"Aces, Charles. You're aces." She patted his shoulder, smiled and then stepped through the front door, closing it softly behind her. Chuck plopped down on the couch after she left and booted up the laptop. Every file, every code, every personal project he'd saved was still there. Untouched and untainted by whatever the CIA had done to the rest of the technology they'd confiscated from RI. Sarah's final gift to him had been saving his project, and in turn, his prospects for the future. As he realized this, Chuck had to smile to himself. She _had_ cared about him in some way, shape or form. Sarah had not lied about that. Maybe she never had any romantic feelings for him, but somewhere deep inside, she really did believe that he was worthy of something. There was no reason she should have rescued his laptop, she would not gain anything professionally or personally. In fact, Chuck thought she may have had to struggle through some red tape to get his laptop back without letting the CIA peruse it first.

Chuck ran a hand over his face, massaging the tension from his brow with his fingertips. Sarah Walker was a dichotomy wrapped in an enigma, and although Chuck still felt the bitter ache from learning about her dishonesty, he wanted nothing more than the chance to thank her. Not just for obtaining his laptop, but for everything. For making him believe in himself, for giving him the chance to work with Roark even in spite of the man's duplicity, for telling him that she believed in him. Chuck closed his eyes, leaning against the back of the couch, allowing the exhaustion that he'd felt over the past few days to overtake him and before a minute had past, he'd fallen fast asleep.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck woke with a start, glancing wildly around his darkened living room and then at his watch, realizing he'd slept for nearly three hours. It was already 8 o'clock in the evening. Chuck stood, stretched and peeked through the blinds, across the courtyard into Ellie's apartment. He could see her and Devon through the window, curled on their couch and chatting over glasses of wine, exchanging soft kisses every now and again that make Chuck squirm with jealousy.

"Hey buddy." Chuck hadn't noticed the front door open. He whirled around to see Morgan standing in the doorway, gazing at him sympathetically. "Sorry, I'm home so late. I had to take care of some inventory screw ups at the Buy More. You doing okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine." Chuck gave Morgan a weak smile that was entirely unconvincing. Morgan nodded and cleared his throat nervously before rummaging through the work bag slung over his shoulder.

"I stopped by Ellie's just a minute ago. She wanted me to give you this. Says she's been keeping it for you since the beach trip." Morgan found what he was looking for in his bag, pulling it out with a whimsical flourish. Chuck watched as the familiar pink towel unraveled in Morgan's hands and hung between them.

Chuck reached out for the towel, taking it first with just his fingertips before clutching it tightly and pulling it against his chest. "How did Ellie get this?"

Morgan shrugged. "She just told me that Sarah left it for you. Kind of a nice gesture I suppose...I mean...considering everything...else." Morgan drifted off, watching Chuck's expression go from wary, to confused and then softening into a small smile. He looked up at Morgan, the smile widening but not reaching Chuck's tired brown eyes.

"Thanks." And suddenly, before Morgan could reply, Chuck's face lit up. He folded the towel in the air and laid it gently on the couch, turning back to Morgan and asking. "Do you mind if I borrow the Herder, tonight?"

"I...Well...It's technically a company car. But, I mean, you're technically a former employee..."

"And your best friend," Chuck added.

"And my best friend." Morgan paused, glancing once at the puppy dog look on Chuck's face before caving. "Alright! Alright. Enough with the face. You can use it." He dug into his pocket, tossing the keys at Chuck, who caught them mid air and bolted for the door.

"Thank you!"

"Where are you going?" Morgan called after Chuck's retreating form.

"Malibu!" Then the door slammed shut and Morgan stood alone in the living room, shuffling his feet and wondering what in the hell had just gone through his best friends' head.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck pulled up to the beach in Malibu a little over an hour later. It was almost nine in the evening now, and the only light came from the small houses and hotels that dotted the road. Once Chuck stepped out of the car and made his way across the sand, the lights and sounds from the buildings faded behind him and he was alone in a world of crashing waves, gentle wind, and the glow of the moon and stars above.

He'd jokingly told Sarah that this beach must be cursed, but now, Chuck wasn't so sure. The course of his life had changed twice, in under a year, on this very beach. It couldn't be all bad if he'd spent some of the most memorable moments of his life here. Chuck kept walking until he reached the shore. Kicking off his shoes, he allowed the waves to lap at his toes while the gentle wind swept through his short curls.

He looked up at the sky, his eyes roaming the stars, searching for the telltale blink of airplane lights. After a few minutes, he saw two pairs of lights flying overhead, each going in different directions. Chuck had no way of knowing if Sarah was on either of those planes, or if hers had already left hours ago, but for Chuck's purposes, any plane would do. He picked the plane on the left, its lights growing smaller and smaller as it flew out over the ocean. He waited until the taillights grew so faint that they almost blended with the stars and then he released a deep breath, closing his eyes and letting his body sway back and forth in the breeze.

This was the best way he could think of to let Sarah go, along with his hurt and misery. He looked back up at the sky after a moment but the plane was lost amongst the stars now, and symbolically, so was Sarah. Chuck mumbled a soft goodbye, letting the words drift into the wind, across the waves, into the distance. And then he turned back to the Nerd Herder and headed back down the road to Burbank, his personal mission complete.

 **February 19th, 2009: CIA HQ, 1000 Hours:**

Sarah's debrief of the mission in Burbank with Graham lasted far too long. She was still exhausted from the infiltration of RI and her fight with Bryce and the emotionally draining conversation with Chuck. Now she sat in Graham's office, recovering from her flight while also dealing with the many tedious details that came with tying up any loose ends left over from a mission.

She'd done her best to explain to Graham how much Bryce had been a hindrance rather than a help on the mission. Whether it was his insistence that they lie and abuse Chuck's trust, or ignoring her suggestions for the success of the mission, or tormenting and threatening Chuck, who was, for all intents and purposes, nothing more than a civilian. The speech seemed to go on forever, and by the time Sarah felt she'd told Graham all there was to know, she was completely drained.

Graham leaned forward in his chair. He'd been silent during Sarah's explanation, but now he wore a slightly curious expression. "Thank you for your detailed report, Agent Walker. I will deal with Agent Larkin as I see fit, but I can assure you his actions will not go without some degree of consequence. However, in his own debriefing, he mentioned that he believed your treatment of Mr. Bartowski may have been influenced by your feelings for the man. Agent Larkin seemed to think you were emotionally compromised. Your thoughts?"

Sarah remained stone faced, but inside, frustration was twisting her gut. By the CIA's standards, she had certainly been compromised. But Chuck wasn't just any asset. He'd been there for her when she felt like she couldn't trust anyone. Their bond had been formed six months before the mission in Burbank. How was she supposed to explain that to a man like Graham?

"No," she said finally. "I wasn't compromised by my feelings for Chuck Bartowski."

Graham frowned. "And yet you admit that you had a personal connection with him?"

"Yes, I do. The connection I had with Chuck was a factor I intended to take advantage of on the mission. Chuck trusted me and I trust him. Bryce was insistent we treated Chuck like any other asset. But Chuck doesn't respond to...usual tactics. He's different, he's special. And he would have been a perfect asset from the very beginning if Bryce had allowed me to use my friendship with Chuck."

"So you believe that the bond you had previously established with Chuck would have been an asset rather than a hindrance to this success of this mission?"

"I do. And it was. Chuck was the one that helped us take down Roark. There was absolutely no way we could have done it without his help. Any issue that Bryce may have with Chuck's involvement is entirely personal, I assure you. Bryce wanted this mission to go well to bolster his own spotless record, and he wanted to do it this way. He never cared about Chuck, or me, or the dozens of innocent people Roark might have hurt."

Graham nodded, seemingly satisfied with Sarah's reply. "Very well, Agent Walker. Agent Larkin will be dealt with. In the mean time, I have another mission prepared for you."

"Just a second, sir. I have a favor to ask of you." Graham's eyebrows rose. "Chuck was adamant that he received no reward, other than the freedom to return to his normal life after the mission. But I believe he deserves more than that. I think we should send him a compensation for his actions."

"What exactly do you mean?"

"Chuck could easily have been killed during the mission. He came very close to serious harm and I think we owe him something for putting his life on the line for us when he had no reason to." Sarah paused, waiting for Graham's reaction but he was silent. "I suggest we send him a severance of some sort, sir. He deserves that much for carrying out the duties expected of any agent in this Agency. I don't think I need to remind you that by helping us take down Roark, Chuck essentially sabotaged his own position within RI, perhaps even his career. He's without a job because of us." Graham looked thoughtful. He rubbed his chin and pursed his lips before responding. "I'll consider your request, Agent Walker. You make a good argument. Bartowski stepped up when not many others would have."

Sarah nodded gratefully, for now, that was all she could ask for. Graham leaned back in his chair again and laced his fingers underneath his chin.

"Now that we've settled that, I'd like to brief you on the new mission."

Again, Sarah nodded. Throwing herself back into the 'spy' mindset would help her keep her thoughts away from Chuck.

"I need you to investigate a Czech arms dealer in Prague. Again, you won't be going alone on this. I have a very special agent who's agreed to set their differences aside to join you."

For a moment, Sarah thought Graham might be foolish enough to send her and Bryce on another mission together, but then the door to Graham's opened and Sarah instantly recognized the red hair, snarky grin, and flashing green eyes.

"Sorry, I'm late," the red-head said, not looking at all apologetic as she strode into the room and grinned down at Sarah. "Hey, Walker. Long time, no see."

"Carina."

"The one and only." Carina glanced at Graham and then took a seat in the chair next to Sarah's. "So what's the mission? I haven't missed the briefing have I?"

"No," Graham sighed, nearly rolling his eyes at Carina's flippant attitude. "We were just getting started. As I was just telling Agent Walker, you will be investigating an arms dealer in Prague. I know the two of you struggled when you worked together as members of the Clandestine Attack Team, but I've taken the liberty of splitting the squad into teams of two. Agents Rizzo and Lee will be carrying out their own mission, and I trust the both of you will be able to do the same and put your differences behind you."

"Of course," Carina nodded. "Walker and I are like peas in a pod."

Sarah couldn't disagree. The only agent she really distrusted in her old squad was Zondra. Carina, she could deal with. Even still, she'd keep an eye out for any possible treachery.

"There won't be a problem, sir," she said, earning a smile from Carina. "Agent Miller and I will get the job done."

"Excellent. The two of you are dismissed. I'll send you the full case file in a few days. Until then, take some time to realign yourselves as partners. Good luck, Agents."

Carina stood, bouncing her eyebrows at Sarah and opening the door for her, with a grand sweeping gesture. "After you, partner."

Sarah rolled her eyes and smirked. At least she knew she'd have her hands full with Carina. Hopefully the distraction would help her keep her mind off of Chuck. If anyone could get her head back into the spy game, it was Carina Miller.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck sighed as the Buy More's automatic doors slid open for him and he took his first steps back inside since Sarah had found him bargaining with Jeff and Lester. He took a quick glance around the store, noting that nothing significant had changed. The place still smelled like a combination of plastic and dirty linoleum. The same signs advertising the latest deals and products hung above various aisles. And the Nerd Herd desk sat right in the middle of it all, its enormous logo making it impossible to miss.

Thanks to Morgan, who had taken a position as co-manager of the store when Chuck had left to work for Roark, Chuck had his job back as Head Nerd Herder. And as grateful as he was to his best friend for securing him a stable job while he worked to get his game off the ground, it felt absolutely soul crushing to be back in this place. He'd been so close to getting out for good, it felt now like he was being sucked into a black hole. Chuck shook his head, determined not to let any pessimism distract him from his goal. He would only be here until he had a decent amount of funds to use to kick start his game, and hopefully his own independent company. This wasn't like before, he reminded himself. He was a different man now, he'd grown, he had a goal.

Keeping his chin high, Chuck strode towards the Nerd Herd desk, skirting around the back and setting his laptop bag down on the desk, ignoring Jeff and Lester; the latter of whom was glaring daggers at him.

"Jeff, Lester," Chuck acknowledged them each with a quick nod.

"Well, well, well," Lester sneered. "How the mighty fall. Eh, Charles? I knew you'd come crawling back to us eventually."

Chuck ignored the anger that flared in his chest and offered a tight smile instead. He began unpacking his laptop, intending to boot up his project and spend the day working on it as opposed to any actual "nerd herding". Morgan had promised to cover for him if Big Mike were to notice. The two of them fully intended to do whatever it took to help Chuck's game take off. The Buy More was nothing but a cover job for Chuck at the moment. Jeff and Lester could tease him all they wanted, he had bigger plans and the two morons weren't going to dampen his determination.

"Gotta say Charles, it feels a little bit like you've hit rock bottom...again, don't you think?" Lester continued. "Lost your fancy job at Roark Instruments, aka Terrorist Incorporated, and forced to join us pleebs back at the Buy More-"

"Lost your girlfriend too," Jeff mumbled, pinning Chuck with his vacant stare. Chuck felt his heart clench at the words, but he managed to maintain his placid expression.

"That's right!" Lester agreed. "Lost the hot blonde. I can't really say I understand what she saw in you in the first place though, Charles. Women like her don't date nerds like you."

Chuck stood so suddenly that both Jeff and Lester cringed away from him. Chuck smirked inwardly; the two were complete cowards and their words-while hurtful-meant nothing to him. He'd been through far worse in the last few weeks. There was nothing they could throw at him now that would stick... The truth was he'd already told himself the same thing dozens of times since Sarah left.

"You're right," Chuck said, pausing to enjoy the baffled looks on Jeff and Lester's faces when he agreed with them. "Back to square one, I guess. Looks like I shot too far and came crashing back down. Ah well, what are you gonna do?" Chuck glanced at his watch and then at his computer. "Time's wasting guys. We'd better get to work or Big Mike might keep us late to work in the Cage."

He turned away from Jeff and Lester then, letting them digest his indifference to their teasing, and focusing on his project instead. Just as he'd expected, Jeff and Lester left him alone after that, quickly losing interest in teasing him if he wasn't going to take the bait. Chuck had far more important things to focus on now anyway-rather, one very important thing; getting his game off the ground.

 **March 13, 2009: Burbank, CA: 1100 Hours**

Chuck and Morgan's plan to continue developing the game, under the guise of his nerd herd job, was progressing without a hitch. In only a month, Chuck had managed to make a substantial amount of progress on the game, and he'd also gotten in contact with his old office mates from RI. Pete and Jose, both woefully unemployed, had agreed to put their programming skills to use helping Chuck whenever they could. Just like he'd promised his sister, Chuck was already well on his way to getting out of the Buy More again. In only another week or so, the game would be marketable and Chuck was already taking steps to look for his own office space if the game roped in some funds once it was publicized.

Jeff and Lester left the Nerd Herd desk for their lunch break once noon rolled around, but Chuck remained engrossed in his project. Suddenly the 'ding' of the bell on the desk sounded and shocked him out of his concentration. Chuck jumped, looking up into the deep brown eyes of a beautiful young women, dressed in a smart black pantsuit. She smiled at him, her bright pink lips curving and revealing a row of straight, white teeth.

"Hi," she chirped, tucking a lock of dark brown hair behind her ear. "I was wondering if you might be able to help me?"

"Uh, yeah, of course!" Chuck stood quickly, adjusting his tie and straightening his already very crisp shirt. "What can I do for you?"

"I was hoping you could help me find some pieces I need for a router repair," the woman said.

"Router repair? Yeah, of course, follow me. What exactly do you need the parts for..." Chuck drifted off, raising his brows, indicating with a small gesture of his hand that he'd like to know her name.

"Hannah." She smiled brightly at him. "McKay. I'm an IT rep.

"Hannah, pretty name." Chuck replied with a goofy grin.

"Thanks. I'm pretty fond of it. And your name?"

"Me? Chuck. I'm Chuck. They call me Chuck." Hannah snickered, following him a little more closely as they wove through the Buy More's many aisles.

"Good to meet you Chuck." He led Hannah to the computer repair aisle and helped her search through various parts, making sure to check what exactly it was she was looking to repair to make sure she had the best piece for the job. When Hannah decided on the parts she needed, she turned to Chuck and smiled again. "Thanks for all your help. I'm new to the Burbank area, I wasn't even sure you guys would have the parts I needed."

"You just moved here?" Chuck asked.

"Yeah, for work. Obviously. It's nice here. A little lonely though, I don't know anybody yet."

"Well, you know me," Chuck said, unable to stop his own grin from forming when Hannah giggled.

"That's true. Maybe you can show me around Burbank sometimes. Help me get to know the place."

"Yeah, of course," Chuck agreed, almost too eagerly. "How about this Saturday? I'll give you the grand tour, starting with the local Large Mart, of course."

Hannah laughed again. "Saturday sounds great." They quickly exchanged numbers and then Hannah gathered the parts she'd chosen, and headed towards the checkout line at the front of the store. She threw one last glance over her shoulder, peering at him from beneath her long lashes. "See you Saturday, Chuck."

"See you then!" Chuck called after her, feeling a foolish grin spread across his cheeks. Maybe working at the Buy More for a little while longer wouldn't be so bad after all...

 **July 8** **th** **, 2009, Washington DC: 2100 Hours**

"Wow," Carina sighed, closing the door of the apartment she shared with Sarah and pinning her roommate and partner with a shrewd grin. "That Barker guy was all over you. Practically drooling, Walker."

"Was he?" Sarah sighed disinterestedly, kicking off her boots at the door and slumping into the small living room.

"Yeah!" Carina balked, her brows flying upwards. "Seriously, you didn't notice? Or are you just not interested? In which case, may I just say, you are absolutely insane. That guy is cut, Sarah. Cut! I could count his twelve pack through his god damn suit."

Sarah waved away Carina's comment and pulled her suitcase out of the corner of the living room, where it sat tucked against the bookshelf. It was still packed from her most recent mission to Prague, where she and Carina had been tasked with investigating a Czech arms dealer. The mission had gone smoothly, with both Sarah and Carina having been able to put the unceremonious end of the CAT Squad behind them. Without Amy and Zondra to complicate the mix, Sarah and Carina found they performed quite well together. Flawlessly in fact. Graham had also taken notice and upon their return called them both for a briefing regarding their next mission to Moscow. It included investigating a Russian arms dealer by the name of Alexei Volkoff. The amount of power and connections he had to other criminal organizations was still in question, and it was Sarah and Carina's job to find out just how treacherous the man was. This mission was far more dangerous and far more technical than the one in Prague, and it was proof that they were both being entrusted with far more responsibility in the Agency.

The briefing, which they'd just returned from, had also included a grizzled agent by the name of Cole Barker. He'd held himself with a level of confidence -or arrogance- that Sarah thought would have put even Bryce Larkin to shame, and she'd shut down the second he threw a frisky grin her way, focusing instead on what Graham was telling them about their upcoming mission.

"Not interested," Sarah muttered, realizing she still hadn't replied to Carina, who was staring at her like she had lobsters crawling out of her ears.

"Okay fine," the red-head huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning against the back of the couch. "If you don't want him, then I'm taking him."

"He's all yours," Sarah teased, allowing a light smile to grace her features. But Carina still wasn't satisfied.

"What's with you these days, Walker?" she asked. The question was so unexpected that Sarah could only blink in response. "Seriously. You've got everything going for you right now. Graham talks about you like you're the second coming of Christ. You've got all of these hunky agents falling over themselves to be assigned as your next partner, you're being assigned to missions all over the world and you look like the walking dead every time I see you."

"Thanks," Sarah frowned. Carina rolled her eyes, leaning forward and bracing her forearms against the couch.

"What happened to Graham's wildcard enforcer? The girl who could drink her squad under the table and then go to another bar for round two? The one who could tear up a dance floor and shatter a man's confidence with just a look? What happened to waking up somewhere unexpected…with _someone_ unexpected…every night? What happened to the Sarah Walker I knew?"

Sarah didn't reply. What Carina had just described wasn't at all what Sarah remembered about missions she'd taken on in the past. True, the members of the CAT squad had some wild nights before their fall out. But nothing more than a night of too many shots of snake juice. Unsurprisingly, Sarah found her partner's description of standard spy behavior completely dramatized and not at all enticing.

She continued shuffling through her suitcase, tossing a few choice garments aside to wash and then repack, while throwing the others into a pile at her feet. "Maybe I realized that this job is serious, Carina," she said finally. "We could lose our lives doing what we do, at anytime, anywhere in the world. We should never have taken it as lightly as we did when we first started. We do dangerous things, we…hurt people."

Carina narrowed her eyes and straightened. "What exactly happened to you in Banklot?"

"What?"

"You know, the mission before you and I went to Prague. The squad split up, then you went to California with Bryce Larkin-by the way, I am seriously disappointed in you for not jumping on that as soon as you could-and when you came back, you were different. So what happened in Banklot?"

"Burbank," Sarah corrected.

Carina snorted. "Whatever."

"Nothing happened," she said, picking through her clothes more slowly now as memories threatened to resurface. "I took out a Fulcrum agent posing as a business tycoon with Bryce. Then we came back to D.C. Then you and I were partnered again and here we are."

"Bullshit, tell me the real story," Carina glowered. Sarah just sighed and shook her head, lifting her suitcase up and turning it over, deciding it would be easier to pick through the outfits once they were all splayed out on the couch cushions in front of her. As the last garment fell out, a small piece of paper fluttered down after it, landing perfectly atop the pile of clothes, face-up for Carina to see. Sarah's eyes widened and she lunged for the picture at the same time Carina did; her partner was faster. She grabbed the picture and spun away, running for the kitchen and putting herself on the other side of the counter top before really taking a close look at the picture she'd stolen from Sarah's suitcase.

"Carina, give it back," Sarah growled, giving Carina her most intimidating glare. Her partner was not phased. She laughed and gazed at the picture, her teasing grin fading as she realized what she was seeing.

"Awww, Walker," she cooed with mock sweetness. "You met a boy." She fluttered her eyelashes and made an exaggerated kissy face. Sarah felt heat flare in her cheeks and she lunged into the kitchen, ready to tear her partner limb from limb to get the picture back.

"Give it back!"

Carina danced just out of her reach, holding the picture at arm's length and racing back into the living room, cackling like a maniac. She jumped onto the couch and looked down at the picture again. "He's kind of cute," she admitted. "for a geek, that is."

"Nerd," Sarah corrected automatically, slapping herself internally a second later when Carina's eyes widened and her mouth fell open.

"Oh my god!" She plopped down onto the couch, releasing the picture when Sarah snatched it away from her and held it behind her back. "Walker! Holy shit, you've got it bad."

"I do not!" Sarah argue, knowing she sounded like a child, but unable to come up with a better retort. Her cheeks still felt like they were on fire.

"Wow, a nerd. Didn't know that was your type, although I guess it explains the lack of interest in, you know, actual 'hot' men," Carina teased. She sobered briefly before adding, "You know, I've heard that nerds are amazing in the sack. But I guess I don't need to tell you that, right?"

"Drop it, Carina," Sarah warned, turning away from her partner, who was still grinning like the Cheshire Cat, and placing the picture back in the inside pocket of her suitcase. She still vividly remembered stowing the picture there after Ellie had gifted it to her on her last day in Burbank. Upon returning to HQ, debriefing with Graham, and returning to her apartment, Sarah had neglected to unpack it. There was nowhere she could it, and quite honestly, looking at it hurt too much at the time. So she'd kept it tucked away, and then it had joined her and Carina on the mission to Prague and now back in D.C. Still, she hadn't removed it. It had become somewhat similar to keeping a security blanket, Sarah thought. It was something that grounded her. Made her feel safe. If Carina discovered all of that, Sarah would never hear the end of it.

"Walker, I'm teasing! Relax. What's the deal with this guy? This-"

"Chuck."

"Aw, you remember his name," Carina cooed again and Sarah had to clench her fists to prevent turning around and making the red-head her new punching bag. "Okay, seriously. What happened?"

"I told you. Nothing," Sarah said, keeping her back to Carina as she resumed organizing her outfits. "He was a mark, I burned him. End of story." It wasn't true, of course. But there was too much to the story that Carina couldn't comprehend. Pretending it had been this simple made Sarah feel a little more distant from the guilt that still plagued her.

"Uh, except it's not," Carina scoffed. "You still have his picture."

"Just a reminder," Sarah said quietly. _Of what I did._

"Of what?" Carina wondered out loud, leaning back against the armrest of the couch. "This guy really did something for you didn't he?"

Sarah was silent. She was done talking about it, especially with Carina, who had never been good with discussing delicate situations in the first place.

"Sarah." Suddenly Carina's voice was much softer. Sarah turned to meet her partner's gaze and saw a sincerity in them that she hadn't expected. "Stop lying to me. It's obvious that this guy means something to you. Spies don't keep mementos, they don't keep pictures, they certainly don't remember the name of some random Joe they burned for the sake of a mission. How long have we known each other, Sarah?"

"I don't know," Sarah shrugged, still trying to digest Carina's little speech. "A long time."

"Since we were little baby spies," Carina joked. "And I've seen you become a wildcard, an enforcer, an ice queen even. But I've never seen you sentimental. And not just about Chuckie."

"Chuck."

"You haven't been invested in your missions, you don't care what Graham has to say about you. You go through the motions now, but I know you, Sarah, and I know your heart isn't in it. You don't go out with me on free days, you ignore the men falling at your feet. You've changed. Don't you see that?" Carina asked, rising from the couch and slowly approaching her quiet partner. "Maybe it's time for you to really think about whether you want to keep this up."

"What do you mean?"

Carina waited for a few moments to make sure her friend and partner was looking at her. "I mean; do you really want to be a spy anymore? The adventure, the danger, the wild, rampant sexual encounters, that's what it's all about."

"That's not what it's all about. "

"I'm just saying! The things that you used to live for don't seem to matter anymore." Carina dipped her chin to the picture peeking out of Sarah's suitcase. "Oddly attractive, shirtless beach nerds get your motor going now."

"Carina."

Carina grinned and stuck her tongue out. "Look, it's not a bad thing if 'normal' is what you want, Sarah. Boring, yes. But bad? Nah. You're probably more suited to the 'soccer mom' look anyway."

"You're such an ass," Sarah said, shoving Carina's shoulder and rolling her eyes. Carina laughed and nodded, "That I am. Okay, enough of this mushy shit. It's only nine, let's get out and enjoy one last night of freedom before Moscow!"

Sarah didn't have a chance to decline, Carina had her heels back on and was out the door in a matter of seconds, honking the horn of her Lotus while she waited for Sarah to join her. Sarah shook her head and sighed. Taking advice from Carina into serious consideration wasn't something Sarah would normally do, but her partner had certainly managed to hit the nail on the head, so to speak. Almost five months after she'd experienced a 'normal' live with Chuck Bartowski and she still couldn't get it out of her head. She couldn't get _him_ out of her head. Taking one final glance at the picture of her and Chuck carrying their surfboards up the beach, beaming at one another, she dashed after Carina, grabbing her boots on the way out the door.

 **September 5th, 2009: Intermedcenter Clinic, Moscow: 1400 hours**

When Sarah woke up, she quickly realized that she wasn't in Moscow. She wasn't in her apartment either. She wasn't sure where she was until she heard the soft beeping of a heart monitor and felt the tubes connected to her arm shift when she flexed her fingers. She took a deep breath, regretting it instantly when fire lanced through her abdomen. She winced and groaned, keeping her breaths shallow and short until the pain ebbed, and then finally dared to open her eyes. Sure enough, she was in some sort of hospital room, laying prone on a steel framed bed surrounded by monitors and chairs. One of the chairs was filled by a visitor. Carina set down her magazine and scooted closer to the bed when she noticed Sarah was awake.

"Well, look who's up. How was the beauty sleep?" she teased. Her obvious prodding was contradicted by the concern etched in grim lines on her face, and the worry shining in her green eyes.

"What happened?" Sarah's voice cracked from disuse and she coughed, another wave of pain lancing through her. Carina helped her take a sip of water from a cup on her bedside table before responding.

"Our mission went a little awry. Cole wasn't in position on time and we got caught in a crossfire. One of Volkoff's men got a lucky shot at you." That explained the pain in her stomach, Sarah thought. "We thought we were gonna lose you there for a little bit..." Carina trailed off, her lively expression faltering again. The events of that night were slowly coming back to Sarah now. She remembered the impact of the bullet, hitting the ground hard enough for the air to leave her lungs. She remembered not feeling any pain after that, just hazy awareness as she stared up at the velvety black sky that twinkled with stars. She remembered hearing gunshots and Cole's deep voice echoing around the street. Carina had hovered above her, pressing her hands into the gunshot wound, absolute terror taking over her face. Sarah remembered thinking that it hadn't been very 'spy-like' of Carina to give in to her panic. But she also remembered her own fear as she wondered if she was about to die on a street in Moscow. No one would have known, besides her team.

No one would have cared either. Who would have attended her funeral? Carina? Maybe the other CATs, if they'd gotten over their bitterness. Sarah had no family anymore, she had no friends, she had no one who really knew her and cared about who she was beyond her spy persona. Except...Chuck. She remembered thinking about him in that dark alleyway. Wondering if he'd ever learn of her death, or if he'd even care? Did he still remember her? Would he be grateful that she was gone? She realized she couldn't blame him for wanting nothing more to do with her. But for her part, Sarah's final thoughts before she'd lost consciousness, had returned to Chuck, and the way it had felt to give in to her feelings for him that night on the beach.

"Well, Cole thought we'd lost you anyway," Carina continued, pulling Sarah from her thoughts. "But I knew better. You're Sarah freaking Walker. It'd take more than a misplaced bullet to take you down."

Sarah offered her friend a weak smile. Her words were kind, but Sarah's mind was still on the one person she knew would have cared, to some degree, if she'd died on that lonely little street. And as if Carina could read her mind, she said, "I knew you were going to be okay the second you started moaning about Chuckie in your sleep."

"What?" Sarah sputtered, her cheeks already beginning to burn. Carina's grin widened.

"Oh yeah, you made some of the nurses super uncomfortable. You know for someone who was supposed to be comatose, you must have been having some pretty hot dreams."

"Carina! You are not serious."

"I am totally serious," Carina replied, although the mischievous flash in her green eyes contradicted that. "You were straight out of a bad porno, Sarah. ' _Ooooh Chuck_. _Please Chuck.'_ "

Sarah would have leaned out the bed to strangle her partner if she wasn't tied to so many tubes. So instead she pinned Carina with her best 'death glare' and remained tight lipped and silent until her partner's smirk subsided.

"Okay! Geez, I'm only teasing, Walker. It wasn't actually that bad, although you did mumble about the nerd more than once. Lighten up a little." Suddenly Carina's face lit up. "He's doing pretty well for himself, you know."

"Oh?"

Carina's face fell and she gave Sarah a dubious expression. "You can Google the guy's name now. He's got his own company; it's got a kind of campy name, but who cares? He's probably loaded with cash now."

"His own company?"

"Mhmm. They make games. How nerdy is that? Right up your alley I guess."

Sarah smiled. So Chuck had taken Graham's check, he'd finished his game. He hadn't let the loss of his job at Roark Instruments slow him down. He'd taken charge of his own destiny, just like she knew he could. But she wanted to know more now that Carina had brought it up. She wanted to make sure he was happy, not just successful. Sarah knew first hand that the two didn't always go hand in hand. As soon as she was able to get out of this hospital bed, she knew she needed to find Chuck and speak with him again. There were many things Sarah regretted doing in her career as a spy; but more than anything she regretted leaving things with Chuck the way she had. If she'd died on the Moscow mission without him ever knowing the whole truth...She didn't want to think about it. But it had come so close to happening. She needed closure. Not just for Chuck's sake, but for her own as well.

"Walker?" Carina pulled Sarah from her thoughts again. "You still in there?"

"Yeah, sorry. I was just thinking."

"About?" Carina urged with a teasing expression, obviously expecting Sarah to mention Chuck.

"I think I want to retire," Sarah said adamantly. Carina's mouth fell open and for the first time since Sarah had known her, she was speechless.

"Wait, what? You want to quit spying? Why?"

Sarah sighed, not sure where to begin. There were so many reasons she wanted to quit. She was still young, but life in the agency was all she'd ever known, besides the con life with her father. But the glimpse of a 'normal life' that Chuck had given her only grew more attractive to her the longer she continued throwing herself into the spy game. There was so much to the simplicity of normalcy and honesty, and she wanted more of it. It had felt so different, so good, to be who she really was around people that genuinely cared for her. She realized that Carina was still waiting for an answer, but everything that had passed through Sarah's head felt like far too much to explain and so she settled on a much simpler answer.

"I need to find Chuck."

* * *

 _ **Sidenote: RobM. You sir, need an account. There are so many Chuck discussions I want to pester you with!**_

 _There we have it another chapter down and ... somewhat of a questionable amount more to go. I can promise you one thing...No more angst after this chapter. I think we've all had enough of it (or maybe it's just me..I'm so tired of writing angst!) That being said, the wait for the next chapter won't be long and then we are in for some fluff. Or are we? Maybe this is all a clever guise to throw you off and keep you around..._

 _It's late. Thank you all for reading! It means the world. Until next time..._


	8. Chapter 8

_**AN:**_ _I was pleasantly surprised with everyone's reaction at Hannah being thrown into the mix so late in the game. As for her last name, which a few of you mentioned, it was intended as a little easter egg for Dexter fans since the Hannah in Chuck was never given a last name in canon...I think. Full disclosure, the idea was entirely_ _ **michaelfmx's**_ _, I am familiar with Dexter and Hannah but not a fan of the show._

 _Anyway, on to this Hannah. A few of you mentioned being a little bit worried about Hannah being burned in this story. Hopefully this chapter makes it clear that was never my intent. Even in canon, I never minded Hannah, although most of the forced love rectangle stuff was bullshit. Hannah was the first non-spy person to get thrown into that mess ad be completely stepped on and forgotten about. The worst, most unforgivable thing that Chuck has ever done (in my opinion only) was sleep with Hannah and then proceed to dump her minutes before meeting her parents with nothing more than a crappy excuse. Hannah didn't deserve that. No one would...Except maybe Jill. That being said, for the purposes of this story, Hannah was meant to be a foil for the changes that Chuck has gone through since the beginning. He has become a far more confident and independent person. He did not pine for a woman he was convinced he'd never see again and he did not put his life on hold like he did for Jill after Stanford. A casual relationship that makes Chuck feel appreciated and helps him grow as a person is the best think I felt could happen for him after Sarah and Bryce left the picture._

 _Was Hannah ever meant to cause angst or love triangle drama? Hell no. She's served her purpose and will bow out gracefully._

 _I've been over this thing a hundred million times for typos, if I missed one, I'm going to have to punch something small and innocent...Anyway. Thank you all for waiting for this update. It was a battle to get through this thing, both_ _ **michaelfmx**_ _and I put quite a bit of work and effort into it. I do sincerely hope you all enjoy._

* * *

 **September 21, 2009: Burbank, CA: 2100 Hours**

"Chuck?" Hannah's voice was quiet but Chuck heard her, even over the explosions and fabricated laser sound effects coming from the TV speakers as _Star Trek: The Next Generation_ continued to play. Light from the screen flickered around the darkened living room, revealing the conflicted expression playing across Hannah's face. "I need to go soon."

Chuck looked at the digital display on his watch. It was only 9:05, Hannah had stayed much later than that before. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know why she wanted to end the evening early, or why she'd been relatively quiet all night in spite of his best efforts to keep the atmosphere light.

"You've still got time," he replied. "Your flight doesn't leave till midnight. And I'll be the one driving, remember?"

"I don't think you should drive me," Hannah replied hesitantly, her voice even quieter now. Chuck ran a comforting hand down her arm, resting his cheek against her dark brown locks. "Hannah...It'll be okay. You're only going to Paris for a few weeks."

"Months, Chuck. I'll be there through New Year's. Maybe longer."

"Months are made of weeks, so I'm going to use the word weeks," he retorted, squeezing her gently. Hannah chuckled before releasing a long sigh.

"Chuck, don't get mad," she began, tilting her chin up to look at him. "You know how much you mean to me. I've really enjoyed our last few months together…you've made me really happy and made my time in LA so much better…" Chuck knew what she was going to say before she even said it. He'd been thinking the same thing over the past couple of weeks, ever since Hannah had learned that her IT position was taking her overseas. "But...I think this...is going to be our last night together."

Chuck was quiet. The words didn't hurt nearly as much as he'd thought they might. Perhaps it was because he'd come to the same conclusion already, but he hadn't wanted to be the one to say it first. As if speaking the words aloud somehow made them more real. Being with Hannah over the last few months had been wonderful. She was funny, beautiful, and most importantly, extremely nerdy. They'd connected quite easily over their love of all things to do with technology and computers. Dating Hannah McKay was easy. It was simple. She made him happy, even when he had to deal with the stress of managing his rising company. Of course, therein lay the issue. Not only was Hannah's position as an IT rep taking her away from him, but they'd hardly had a night to spend together since last month because Chuck was just as busy with his own company, Carmichael Electronics. It hadn't seemed like such a huge responsibility in the very beginning, but since then all his time had been spent finding an office space close to home, hiring new faces besides Morgan, Jeff and Lester, budgeting and developing ideas for his game and leading an entire team of bright and eager individuals. Of course, Chuck still had Pete, Jose and Morgan to help lead the burgeoning company, but he felt a personal responsibility to be involved in as many of the day-to-day processes as he could. He hardly had enough time for himself, let alone his relatively new girlfriend. And they both knew it. As soon as things had gotten busier, they'd known that their time together was limited. But neither of them had really wanted it to end. The time they did spend together was fun and an easy way to relieve stress.

That being said, Hannah had only ever spent the night once. And while it was a night that Chuck would always remember fondly, it was probably better in the long run to break things off before they became too complicated.

So he just smiled softly down at Hannah and kissed her gently, pulling her closer and returning his attention to the television. Hannah curled against him, lay her head on his shoulder and resigned herself to another few minutes of silence before she walked out the door and out of Chuck's life. As soon as the TV went dark, Hannah rose and began gathering her things; her suitcase, her coat, and her cell phone, while Chuck called her a cab. Far too soon, they heard the honk echo through the courtyard and Hannah approached the front door, turning to face Chuck and forcing a tight smile.

"Will you keep in touch, at least?" he murmured, reaching for her hand. Releasing her suitcase, Hannah laced her fingers loosely with his and nodded.

"Of course I will. I'll send you pictures of the Eiffel Tower as soon as I can. And you'll have to keep me up to date on your game. I want to see it released worldwide, Chuck."

"So you can play it all the way in Paris?" he teased. She giggled and nodded. "Yeah, so I can play it all the way in Paris."

The laughter faded as they heard a second honk and Hannah pulled her hand away, using it to brush at the corners of her eyes instead. "I'd better go."

"What do we say?" Chuck asked, taking a step towards her as she turned to face the door.

"Good night?" she suggested, peering over her shoulder at him. Chuck liked that, it didn't seem quite as final that way.

"Yeah, okay. Good night, Hannah."

"Good night, Chuck," she replied. Before she left, she tugged him close and planted a final peck on his lips. Then she stepped through the door and closed it softly behind her, leaving Chuck standing alone in the dark. He sighed. Knowing that his relationship with Hannah had been coming to an end made the blow a little easier to take. Nevertheless, Chuck knew the loss was bound to sting for awhile. Hannah had been just what he needed to heal after the whirlwind that was Sarah Walker blew through his life and turned everything upside down. Hannah was the opposite. She was nice, quiet and happy with the simple things in life. Chuck didn't have to worry about stepping over any lines with her. Whatever happened to him now, he'd always be grateful to Hannah for waltzing into his life when he needed normalcy the most.

 **3 months later: December 19, 2009: Manhattan, NY: 1700 hours**

Chuck didn't think of Hannah nearly as much as he had in the first few weeks after she'd left. He'd been too busy since then and only recently had he discovered that she'd posted quite a few pictures to her Friendster account of her adventures in France with a handsome, dark haired man named Adrien. She'd even taken one of the two of them in front of the Eiffel Tower, just like she promised. The discovery didn't shock Chuck, considering the peaceful way they'd ended things. Honestly, he was happy she'd managed to find someone in Paris. Hannah deserved that. At least she was happy, and at least his flourishing company was keeping him busy. He'd been invited to New York three weeks ago to represent the company's game at TechCon. It was a wonderful opportunity, and Chuck was hoping against all hope that they might be able to impress a more successful developer at the convention and really get the game off the ground.

As he strolled through the streets of New York, hoping to grab a quick cup of coffee before his panel, his thoughts began to drift where they always seemed to whenever he found a moment to breathe. He'd been able to enjoy so much success in the brief few months between the conception of his own company and the invitation to the Con, but he wondered if the woman who'd gotten him to this point was in as good a place as he.

Chuck blew out a rush of air, watching it curl upwards into the sky like a wisp of smoke. Sarah was out there somewhere. And he wished he knew where. But her job could have taken her anywhere in the world. She could just as easily be hunched over a desk in D.C. as she could be quelling a coup in the Middle East with nothing more than a spork. Chuck chuckled to himself at the image of Sarah Walker fighting her way through an army of enemies with nothing but a kitchen utensil. As amusing as it was to imagine, he also knew that it was entirely within the realm of possibility. If anyone could pull it off, she could.

He also knew he really shouldn't be thinking about her as often as he has been, but it was an inevitable part of the growth of his company. He didn't know where he would be if Sarah hadn't found him buried in the sand in Malibu over a year ago, but it wouldn't be here. Maybe he'd still be working for Roark, ignorant to the man's treachery, developing technology for a criminal. Or maybe he'd still be at the Buy More, letting his Stanford diploma gather dust on his bureau. Maybe he wouldn't have developed such a strong friendship with Casey, who had left RI with him and joined up as Head of Security for Chuck's own business. Maybe he wouldn't have prompted Morgan to take the next step in his relationship with Anna and move into an apartment with his now very serious girlfriend. Maybe they wouldn't have had that long conversation about marriage the other week. Maybe Ellie and Awesome wouldn't have made another trip to the Malibu beach house on their own, and maybe Chuck wouldn't be getting his little niece or nephew quite so soon. So many things could have been different if Sarah hadn't driven him home from Malibu all those months ago and convinced him that he was worth more than he gave himself credit for, setting off a ripple effect in Chuck's life that continued to surprise him in ways he never imagined. She'd believed in him from the start, and that faith made Chuck feel like he could do absolutely anything, even now that Sarah was long gone.

Along with wishing he knew where in the world she was, he wished he could speak with her again. Just to get a few answers. There were still so many things he wanted to know, so many questions still running through his head. But who knew if he'd ever have the chance to see her again. Maybe she wasn't in D.C. or Turkey, or Moscow. Her job was dangerous. Maybe she'd been injured. Maybe shot, tortured, captured. Maybe she was...Chuck couldn't bring himself to even think the word, but he knew that it was also a possibility. It made him shiver to even think that Sarah was no longer out there somewhere, that he'd never have the opportunity to lay his eyes on her, just one more time. Or hear her voice. See her smile. The thought was making him queasy.

Chuck stopped at a crosswalk, shifting his weight from foot to foot as the cold wind bit through his jacket. While he waited for the light, he wondered if Sarah ever thought of him in quiet times like this. Did she ever look up at a darkened sky and wonder where he was, or what he might be doing? Or had she forgotten him a long time ago? That was probably the more likely possibility. The light turned green, signaling that he could cross with the rest of the crowd, but before Chuck could move a single muscle he heard a voice that stopped him dead in his tracks. "Chuck?"

His heart stilled in his chest. There was no way. It couldn't be her. It was so wildly unlikely that she would find him here, in this bustling city, at just the right stop light. But even as he turned to face her, he knew that somehow, someway, she'd managed to find him. Again. And when he had made a complete 180, he found he was correct. She stood before him, wrapped in a bright scarlet pea coat, her breath misting past those soft pink lips he still remembered the feel of. His eyes fell on hers, they were light grey, almost the exact same shade as the clouds above them, and her golden hair-just a little longer than he remembered-curled at the ends underneath the hat she wore that shielded her ears from the cold.

"Sarah?" he breathed, not trusting his eyes. He was probably just losing his mind and only imagining that she was standing in front of him, close enough to touch. But then she smiled at him and all of his uncertainties faded. Of course she was here. Of course she'd found him in the most unlikely of circumstances. It had happened twice before, so why not again? Chuck didn't need any more convincing that the universe was doing it's damndest to push them together. Suddenly he felt as if a shock of ice had just flooded through his veins. The last time they'd run into each other she'd been undercover. Everything she'd said, or did, had been to find out all she could about Roark. Their friendship had been nothing but lies….at least that's how it had felt to Chuck at the time. As excited as he was that she'd found him again, out of the blue, he couldn't help the apprehension rising in his chest. It seemed too coincidental that she'd found him in the middle of New York City. It was possible that'd she been tracking him, she was still a spy after all. And if it was spy business that had brought her here, then Chuck had to consider that he was about to have his heart played with again if he wasn't careful.

"I was hoping I'd be able to find you here," she said suddenly, as if reading his thoughts. "Do you have a minute to grab some coffee? Catch up, maybe?" Chuck noticed the way she was watching him with, apprehension tightening her features. Almost as if she expected him to turn her down and keep walking.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, of course," Chuck stumbled briefly, deciding that he would be the one to play agent this time. He was ready to get answers from Sarah. He couldn't pass up this opportunity, knowing he might never get another one. And a subtle interrogation at a quiet coffee shop seemed like the perfect setting, so he nodded and gestured for her to lead the way. She led him around the block, walking a few steps ahead of him, but he was never in danger of losing her amongst the crowd that flowed around them. Her coat and hat were bright red, she stood out against the hordes of dark-coated business men and women. Regardless of her bright clothes, Chuck could not take his eyes off her for a moment, for fear that if he looked away, she might disappear.

She led him to a small coffee shop at the end of the block, holding the door open for him as he stepped inside. The cafe was quiet, full of people on their laptops or rifling through their newspapers. Only a soft Christmas tune wafting through the building's speaker system broke the otherwise comfortable silence.

Sarah made her way to the counter and ordered two coffees but Chuck stepped forward to hand the barista his credit card before Sarah could even move to rifle through her purse. He just smiled when she looked at him and said, "It's my treat this time." He wasn't sure if she even remembered the first time she'd paid for his coffee and called it a date. But he did, and he was determined to pay the favor back this time.

"Thanks," she said after the barista handed Chuck back his card. "You just couldn't stand to let me pay for two coffee dates in a row, huh?"

"Oh, is this a date?" Chuck replied, his heart absolutely soaring when he realized that she clearly remembered the first time they'd met for coffee and quiet conversation.

"I don't know what else we could call it," Sarah continued, replaying their banter almost word for word.

"Date it is then."

Coffees now in hand, Chuck took a moment to take his over to the condiment bar, not really caring if Sarah had any comment to make about how he took his coffee this time. After filling his cup with far more cream and sugar than was probably healthy, he gestured for Sarah to pick a table, smirking slightly at the vaguely bewildered expression on her face as she watched him doctor his coffee.

Once they found somewhere to sit, a small, two-person table in the far corner of the cafe, Chuck allowed himself to look up from his cup and into her eyes. The long months that had passed since he'd last seen her had done nothing to dull his attraction to her, and she looked so much happier than the last time they'd spoken. Or maybe happier wasn't the right word. But there was a contentment playing across her features, a softness that certainly hadn't been there when she'd told him goodbye.

"So," he said, finally breaking the silence between them. "What brings you to New York?"

"You," Sarah replied matter-of-factly, making Chuck choke on the mouthful of hot coffee he'd just swallowed.

"Excuse me?" he coughed, taking a second to clear his throat. "Me? I brought you to New York?"

Sarah nodded, her eyes never leaving his. The intensity of her gaze wasn't unnerving though. "I've been keeping tabs on you for a while now."

"Uh..."

"I had the resources and I wanted to see how you were doing," Sarah continued with a small shrug. "Working for the CIA had its perks."

"Right," he said curtly, trying to quell the spike of anger that ran through him at the mention of her job. "And how is it working at the CIA nowadays?"

Sarah paused, her eyes drifting away from Chuck and down to her coffee cup. He watched her fumble first with the rim of the mug and then drum her fingers nervously against the ceramic table top. After a moment or two of obvious hesitation, Sarah looked up and mumbled, "I wouldn't know actually. I quit."

Chuck decided he needed to stop drinking his coffee as he nearly choked on another mouthful. "You what?" He hadn't been expecting that answer. If it was the truth, and not another lie, then his whole interrogation plan had just flown out the window.

"Retired, actually. That's the word they like to use," Sarah explained, her eyes still trained on Chuck. They were wide, he noted, wary. Almost like a deer caught in headlights. He'd never seen her with that sort of anxious expression and it was a little unnerving.

"Why did you retire?" Chuck asked, leaning forward and lowering his voice, afraid they might be overheard. "I thought you liked being a spy?"

Sarah just looked at him like he'd just suggested they go skydiving without parachutes. But when she spoke again, her voice was patient. "No, Chuck. I didn't like being a spy, not really. Not after I met you."

Chuck sat back, he wasn't sure how to reply to that so he breezed ahead. "If you're not a spy anymore then what _have_ you been doing all this time?"

"Finding myself...I guess." A slight blush crept onto Sarah's cheeks like she was embarrassed to admit that. "I've been with the CIA since I was a teenager. There's a lot I haven't had the chance to experience."

"What about when you were a kid?" Chuck asked. He recalled Sarah mentioning her father at one point, but Chuck was quickly realizing that he knew nothing about Sarah's past, or even her career as a spy.

Sarah shrugged and ran her thumbs around the rim of her coffee cup again. "I didn't have a great family life. I was usually with my dad and he wasn't the most experienced guy when it came to giving a little girl a normal childhood. Being with you and your family in Burbank was the closest I've come to having a real home." Sarah noticed Chuck's saddened expression and added. "You'd be surprised how life changing a Bartowski marshmallow roast can be."

Chuck couldn't hold back his chuckle. "Our marshmallow roast was what hooked you, huh?"

"Not just that. Everything really." Sarah paused again and her brow furrowed like she was straining to find the right words. "Ellie hardly knew me but she treated me like we'd been friends for ages. The wedding photos, the offers to go shopping, the beach house. Before you, I'd never met people I felt I could really trust." When she finished speaking, Chuck noticed her eyes were now roaming his face, searching his expression for something. Maybe approval, he thought. As if there were any way he'd rebuff her for the admission that his family had made her feel safe.

"Never?" Chuck asked, his voice hardly above a whisper.

"No. Occupational hazard, I guess." Sarah smiled. "...How is Ellie?"

"She's good. Great, actually! She's expecting. Four more months left 'till her due date."

"That's fantastic."

"Yeah, we're all excited about inviting a new Bartowski...er slash Woodcomb...into the fold." Chuck replied, grinning. "Ellie would be happy to see you again, you know."

Sarah scoffed and shook her head. "I don't think so. She wasn't very happy with me the last time I saw her."

"Well, neither was I," Chuck replied with a hesitant shrug. "But here we are..."

A smile crept onto Sarah's face. "Here we are. To be entirely honest with you, I'm a little surprised you agreed to coffee." Then the smile began to fade as she continued, "After everything that happened, I wouldn't blame you for hating me."

"Nothing could ever make me hate you, Sarah." His reply was almost instantaneous. It should have made him blush, but the words were so true that he felt no shame in admitting it. Sarah, on the other hand, looked shocked. Her blue eyes widened and her eyebrows bounced upward, then her tiny smile spread into a close-lipped grin.

Chuck smiled back, allowing himself a moment to soak in the genuine happiness she was exuding. This was the Sarah he remembered being captivated by on the beach. Except something was different now. For as kind as she'd been back then, he'd always sensed a hesitance coming from her, like she was afraid of crossing some imaginary line. There were no holds barred now, it seemed. She looked open and almost fragile, each sentence punctuated by a look of apprehension as she evaluated his responses. There were no lies coming from Sarah Walker this time.

"So, finding yourself," Chuck prompted, hoping to put her more at ease with a lighter conversation. "What exactly does that entail? Are we talking backpacking across the Andes? Or like...binge watching Game of Thrones on Netflix for three days straight?"

Sarah looked a little confused, but she laughed anyway and the sound made Chuck's heart flutter. "Uh, traveling. Definitely traveling. I'm not really a television person."

"Right, bummer. So I guess that means you still haven't taken a look at any of the Terminator films yet? I'm telling you, Sarah Connor is right up your alley." Sarah shook her head and smirked until Chuck relented. "Okay then, how about surfing?"

"A little," she said, raising one shoulder in a shrug. "It's not as fun when I don't get to watch someone topple off their board a dozen times in a row."

"Hey! Low blow," Chuck said, wrinkling his nose. "You told me I was doing well!"

"You were. It was still funny."

"Just you wait. The Padawan always surpasses the Master."

Sarah rolled her eyes at him and took a sip of her coffee, missing the Star Wars reference entirely. But Chuck didn't care, he was fascinated by what it felt like to banter so easily with Sarah. The real Sarah, the one who didn't have any ulterior motives and was simply poking fun at him. Or at least, he hoped it was the real Sarah. He'd fallen for her banter back in Burbank too. But she hadn't seemed so anxious back then. It was as if her reactions hinged on his every word. Like she was afraid that the second she said something wrong, he'd get up and leave without a backward glance.

"How about guys?" Chuck fought back a flare of anger at his own question. It wasn't fair for him to feel jealous, but he couldn't help himself. "Anyone...You know. Anyone n _ew_ in your life?"

Sarah's eyes narrowed and Chuck felt a nervous shiver pass through his limbs. His question hadn't come off as blasé as he'd intended and Sarah noticed.

"No, I've been pretty busy since I left Burbank. I haven't really have time to spend on my social life."

"Wait." Chuck's brows knit together. "No one? Really? No boyfriend? No dates? Nothing? Since you left Burbank?" Sarah was growing agitated, Chuck could see that clearly in the way her shoulders tensed and her expression tightened, but he couldn't stop himself. It was a little bit shocking to him that a woman as attractive and amazing as Sarah Walker had no one in her life that appreciated her.

"No." Sarah's tone made it clear she was done answering questions about the matter. But then she turned the conversation around on Chuck. "You?"

"Uh," Chuck paused as Hannah popped into his mind. It was not as if he had anything to be ashamed of by admitting that he'd dated someone else when Sarah left. They had never even been a couple. Still, it felt strange to reveal to Sarah that he had gotten involved in a semi-serious relationship, while she'd spent her days alone, thinking about apologizing to him. "Yeah. A girl named Hannah."

Sarah's brows rose, waiting for him to continue. "We met at the Buy More. It was the only place I could think to go after RI shut down. She was an IT rep and we kind of hit it off right from the start."

"Is she here too?" Sarah asked, and Chuck noticed that she'd retreated slightly, leaning back into her chair to maintain a semblance of distance between them.

"No, she's not. We broke up about three months ago. Her job was taking her overseas. I just didn't think we'd be able to make it work with the relationship being new and both of us being busy..."Chuck trailed off, watching for Sarah's reaction to the news that he was single again. But to his surprise, her smile looked almost proud.

 _Weird._

"That can't have been an easy decision," Sarah said. "But I think you'll be grateful you made it in the long run. So," she continued, clearing her throat in what Chuck thought was an uncharacteristically nervous gesture. "Your game, it's going well? A, uh, friend of mine told me that you have your own company now."

"Yeah, yeah, I do. I've really wanted to thank you for that. You should have seen Ellie's face the day that check from the DCI arrived in the mail. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head."

"I may have put in a good word for you," Sarah teased, arching a brow.

"Well, it couldn't have been Bryce. How is that guy anyway? Still a colossal asshole?"

Sarah's expression suddenly grew very serious. "I don't know. I haven't seen him since we parted ways after the mission. Chuck, I want to apologize for what he did to you."

"Sarah you don't have t-"

"No, I do. Bryce is, or was, supposed to be a professional. The way he treated you was unacceptable and I'm not the only one who thinks so. My supervisor, the DCI, dealt with him, I can tell you that much."

Chuck's lips twitched into a small smile. "Thanks. It's good to hear that. But for the record, I don't think you should be the one apologizing for him."

"Maybe not," Sarah agreed. Chuck saw a flash of apprehension darken her features as she continued. "I have my own mistakes to apologize for." Chuck's smile faded into a frown, but he didn't interrupt, rather he waited for Sarah to continue. "Look, Chuck, everything that happened between us in Burbank...It's not at all how I wanted it to be."

"Me neither..."Chuck was torn. Sarah's sincerity was heart wrenching, and she was giving him the answers he'd yearned for all along, yet he couldn't help but feel a little hesitant. He'd been fooled by her actions before. He wanted so badly to believe her. He wanted to be sure that what she was telling him was the absolute truth.

"I wasn't expecting to see you again after the first day we met in Malibu. When Bryce and I were assigned to Burbank, I knew it was a possibility that we'd run into each other, but you were never a part of the plan, Chuck. I made a lot of mistakes. And I've wanted nothing more over the past few months than the chance to apologize to you." Chuck swallowed the lump rising in his throat as he listened. Sarah's face was so sincere and her words were cutting right to the heart of the issue. "If I could go back and change the way things played out, I would. But I was a coward. I couldn't face up to Bryce or my superiors for fear of losing my job. It's all I've ever known. And I put it before you. Before your family. I can't tell you how much I regret that. You and Ellie are the only ones who've ever made me feel like I had a real home. I was too quick to throw that away. But I've never had to deal with such a personal mission. I've never had to navigate the kind of things I felt...when I was around you."

Chuck's hesitation disappeared the moment Sarah finished speaking. There was no reason for him not to trust that she was being open and honest with him. So honest, in fact, that she was very obviously uncomfortable. That much was apparent in the way she kept searching his face with wide fearful eyes, tapping her fingers or jiggling her knee beneath the table. She wanted him to trust that what she was telling him was the truth. And Chuck realized how terrifying it must be for someone like Sarah to put her heart out on the line for him; someone she'd wronged, someone who could easily walk away, even after she poured her heart out to him.

And so, when Sarah paused for a second to collect her thoughts, Chuck took advantage of the silence to reach out for her hand, brushing the tips of her fingers with his own. Sarah didn't flinch away like he thought she might. Her eyes flickered up to his, and the tension in her shoulders melted away. She looked at him in a way that said she understood he'd forgiven her and that he was grateful for her honesty. Her lips curved into a soft smile and she curled her fingers around his before continuing. "I'm not asking you for anything, Chuck. I know a lot has changed since I left, and you're doing so well for yourself. I'm...I'm really proud of you." Chuck just smiled tightly, unable to speak. "All I wanted was the chance to apologize and hope that someday, you'll be able to forgive me for what I did."

Chuck shook his head fervently. The way she was speaking now sounded so final. But he couldn't let her slip away again, not after she'd bared her heart to him and explained everything that confused him during the mission. They'd both grown. Things had changed. There was no CIA to muddle the equation. Chuck didn't want it to end here.

"Sarah, I think we should...That is, I was wondering if-" Suddenly Chuck's watch beeped loudly and the two of them jumped apart, unaware of the fact that they'd both been leaning towards one another across the table.

"Damn it," Chuck mumbled, looking down at his watch. His panel started in fifteen minutes; he and Sarah were out of time. "Sarah, I'm so sorry. I have to get back to the convention. My panel starts soon, I can't miss it."

Sarah nodded jerkily, slipping her hand out of his and rising from her chair at the same time he did. "Look, there are still some things I want to tell you," Chuck said hurriedly. "I'm staying at a hotel near the convention center. I'll be back there around 9 o'clock. If we could just talk a little bit more...Here," Chuck pulled a pen out of his jacket pocket and scribbled the address on a scrap of napkin for her. "Please. Will you come by?"

Sarah looked down at the napkin and then back up at Chuck, and he saw the guarded look on her face that he'd become so familiar with on the beach. "I have to take an early train back to D.C. tomorrow..."

Chuck took a step closer and gripped her shoulders tightly, the sudden move drew Sarah's eyes to his, but she didn't step away. "Just a quick talk, Sarah. You told me so much about how you felt during the mission, it's only fair that I repay the favor. Just hear me out for an hour or two and then...then you can leave." _If you still want to_ , Chuck thought. With any luck, what he had to say to her would convince her to give them a second chance. "Will you come? Please, Sarah."

Sarah's eyes flickered around his face and then she nodded once. Returning the gesture, Chuck grinned and dropped his hands from her shoulders, letting them slide slowly over the material of her jacket. "Okay, great. I'll see you tonight!"

He spun on his heel and bolted out the door, leaving Sarah staring after him. She glanced at the address on the napkin one more time and then shoved it into her pocket, pulling her hat back on and shuffling through the coffee shop, out into the busy New York streets.

 **The Wydham Hotel, NY, Outside Suite 421: 2100 hours:**

Sarah had made it through the front doors, up the hotel elevator, and down the hall, but she froze once she reached Chuck's door. She stared numbly at the faded red door, as its gold plated numbers stared right back at her. She raised a fist to knock, but stopped before her trembling hand could connect with the door. Squeezing her eyes shut and gritting her teeth, Sarah took a step away from the door, continuing until she felt the opposite wall against her back. Chuck still wanted to talk with her, after everything she'd confessed. He still had hope and knowing that, Sarah couldn't bring herself to truly step back into his life.

She'd quit the CIA to pursue the life he showed her, but had quickly come to realize that it wasn't the freedom that made a normal life special...It was Chuck. Speaking with him at the coffee shop a few hours earlier had only solidified her confidence in the idea that he would be absolutely fine moving on without her. He already had. She was the one who had pined over the time they spent together for months. She was the weaker one and Chuck didn't need her baggage to bring him down. As badly as she wanted to open the door, she knew what Chuck would do. He'd ask her to stay, he'd convince her that she was worth a life with him. He didn't know what he'd be getting himself into with her. She was saving him by leaving again. Sarah opened her eyes, blinking rapidly to clear the moisture forming in them.

 _Coward_ , she thought bitterly to herself. She knew she should at least go in and tell him she was leaving. But she could already see his brown eyes filling with pain and then determination. She could already feel the way he'd grab her and how his voice would sound, sweet and soft, and he'd convince her the right thing to do was to stay. And she'd believe him. She wouldn't be able to fight back if she heard him say the words face to face. She'd make another mistake somewhere down the road and crush Chuck Bartowski again, because the fact of the matter was that she didn't know the first thing about being a normal person. Sarah knew how to run, she knew how to retreat from dangerous or trying circumstances. She knew how to bury her emotions and keep them to herself. She was a master of putting up walls to keep people out. Chuck didn't know that about her yet, and his blind faith in her would be the ruin of both of them. Because finding out who she really was, and the terrible things she'd had to do during the course of her career, would be more than he could deal with. It would be easier to leave him again before another bond had the chance to form.

Besides that, she'd told Chuck she was sorry. She'd gotten her closure. That was what she'd come to New York for in the first place, not to start something up again, not to distract him from his success. She'd done what she needed to do, and the best thing she could do for Chuck Bartowski now, was leave. Before she screwed up his life again. He could move on again, he already had. Learning that Chuck had been in a relationship with another woman, Hannah, wasn't shocking. He deserved someone who could cherish him. Someone better than her. At the same time, Sarah wondered if she was just being selfish. If she got her closure, why couldn't she allow Chuck to get his? That word, coward, came back to mind. Telling herself over and over again that this was the right thing to do until she had convinced herself, Sarah turned away from Chuck's door and trudged slowly back down the hall, down the elevator, through the front doors and back into the city towards her own hotel. When her phone buzzed in her pocket, Sarah didn't need to look at the I.D. to know who it was. Without picking up the call, she turned her phone off and shoved it deep into her coat pocket. This was for the best, it had to be.

 **o-o-o-o**

A knock on Chuck's door woke him early the next morning, far too early. He groaned and mumbled, "G'way!", pulling the covers over his head and rolling face first onto his pillow. The second knock didn't come, but the door opened anyway and Casey's gruff voice shattered the quiet of the room.

"Wake up, Bartowski."

Chuck mumbled a reply, yelping in shock when Casey yanked the sheets straight off the bed, exposing him to the chilly morning air. "Casey!"

"I've been calling you for the past thirty minutes," Casey replied, dropping the duvet on the floor, out of Chuck's reach. "What the hell happened to you last night? You slipped out of the convention hall and disappear back to your room? I thought you would have been happy that the CEO of Insomniac Games talked to you about buying your game last night."

"I am," Chuck assured him, trying to clear the sleep from his voice. "I just...I was expecting someone last night."

"Oh come on, Chuck," Casey groaned rubbing his forehead. "I know we're in New York, but have some standards..."

"What? I...No! Casey, no. No," Chuck grimaced, realizing what Casey thought he'd meant. "I didn't _hire_ anyone. I...ran into Sarah. Before the panel. I talked with her."

"The agent?"

"Yeah, but she's not an agent anymore. I asked her about...well, everything really. And I ran out of time before the panel, so I asked her to come to the room to finish clearing the air. I really thought she would, Casey. But she never showed. Never answered my calls. She's gone. And I fell for it again." Chuck let his chin fall against his chest, running his fingers through the long curls on top of his head, tugging on them in frustration. There was a squeak on the wooden floor as Casey dragged a chair across it to sit in front of Chuck, and then he waited patiently until Chuck looked up from his lap.

"Have I ever told you about Kathleen?" Casey began, to which Chuck just shook his head glumly. Casey grunted and leaned back in his chair, cracking his knuckles one by one as he gathered his thoughts. "I was married, Chuck. Long time ago, when I was just about your age. To a wonderful woman named Kathleen McHugh."

Chuck's eyebrows jumped. "You were married? I had no idea."

"Yeah. You wouldn't have back then either. Now shut up and let me tell the story." Chuck bit his lip to show he was listening. "Kathleen and I got married while I was still an enlisted man. I think she had a weird, romantic notion about marrying an army man, even though I told her it would be difficult, that I'd be deployed more often than I'd be home with her. But she told me she loved me, and that she knew we could make it work

"Long story short, we couldn't. I was married to my job just as much as I was married to Kathleen. Service demanded a lot from me. And there were so many things I couldn't share with her about my life. She spent her days thinking that I wanted to lie to her and to keep secrets. She began to believe that I felt more loyalty to my job than to her. And do you know what, Chuck? She was right. I was so dedicated to a job that took my everything, that I couldn't give myself to the woman I loved. Do you see where I'm going with this?"

Chuck had been listening with such rapt attention that for a moment he thought Casey's question was part of the story. "Uhh..."

Casey waved Chuck's delayed response away and continued. "I think that your Sarah has had to deal with a lot of the same sort of things, Chuck. But you know what's different about what she did versus what I did?" Chuck shook his head. "She came back for you. And I'll bet you that whatever reason she gave you for having retired so early is bullshit. She left a prominent position at an incredible agency, came to New York City looking for you to answer your questions because she couldn't stand to lie to you anymore. That's what I should have done with Kathleen."

Chuck looked down at his feet, frowning. "But, Casey, if she really came for me, then why didn't she show up last night? What stopped her?"

"Dunno," Casey shrugged. "But the way I see, you have two options. One, you can sit here feeling sorry for yourself and wonder for the rest of your life what it was that kept her away. Or, you can be the one to go and find her this time and ask her yourself."

"Go and find her..."Chuck repeated slowly.

"But if you decide not to, then you need to let her go, Chuck. Really let her go."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Casey gave him a dubious look. "It means you delete her number and any pictures you might have. It means you get rid of that weird, pink scarf of hers you've kept with you for months. It means you don't think about her when you're alone. It means you don't look up when you think you see her passing by in the street."

"It's a towel, not a scarf..." Chuck mumbled.

Ignoring his interruption, Casey continued, "If you can do all those things, really let her go and not regret what you might be missing out on by not fighting to turn this thing around, then by all means, stay in the hotel room. Go back to sleep even, it's only 6:30 anyway."

Chuck frowned down at his lap. As frustrating as it was to admit, Chuck was still holding on tightly to the idea that he and Sarah could really be something. He needed to let...No. Chuck paused when he realized that _didn't want_ to let her go. Casey was right, about everything, about Sarah's reasons for coming to New York, about how hard Chuck was fighting to keep her in his life, even when she couldn't really be there. He was right about having another opportunity to make things work. And he didn't want to let Sarah go. Casey was right. If he didn't find out, he would regret it. He wouldn't be able to do all those things that he needed to do to move on. He wanted a future with her. He wanted to know what it was like to walk down the street hand in hand with her, kiss her without fear of frightening her away, hear her laugh or see her smile at some stupid joke he told. He _couldn't_ let her go.

"6:30?" Chuck glanced at the clock on his bedside table in disbelief. Suddenly he remembered what Sarah had mentioned last night about leaving on a train to D.C. first thing in the morning. Was she already gone? Did he even have time to try and catch her? Leaping out of bed, Chuck dashed across the room to his suitcase, tossing his dirty clothes aside in search of fresh ones. "If I hurry I can still make it to Grand Central Station in time. I just need to hunt down a cab and..."

"Don't bother with a cab," Casey growled, rising from his chair and crossing to the door. "If you really want to get to the station in time, you'll let me drive."

"Casey, you drive like a maniac."

"And I'll get you to the Station before seven. Now put your damn pants on and let's go."

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck kept a white knuckled grip on the passenger side door during the entire drive to Grand Central Station. Even this early, the streets were busy, and true to form, Casey drove like a madman through the traffic. As terrifying as it was to sit as a hapless passenger, Casey pulled up in front of the Station just minutes before seven o'clock. He didn't give Chuck a chance to speak, just pushed open the passenger side door and gestured for him to run.

Chuck scrambled out of the car, dashing around the car and through the Station's front entrance. Immediately he was swept up into the crowds already milling through the main concourse. Numbers and addresses flipped across digitized boards all over the walls, a voice spoke over a loud speaker, and Chuck did the best he could to scan the crowd as he made his way to the ticket booth, hoping a concierge there would be able to help him.

There was already a line at the booth and Chuck didn't want to wait, Sarah might already be boarding a train at this point. Chuck pushed his way to the front of the line, throwing apologies left and right as people shouted protests. The concierge looked up from where he'd just finished helping another customer and noticed Chuck shouldering his way to the front of the line.

"Sir, I'm sorry, I must ask that you wait at the end of the line," the concierge drawled, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"I'm sorry, I just have a question. I don't need a ticket. I just need to know if there's a train, or bus, leaving for D.C. anytime soon. "

"Any questions or concerns you might have regarding tickets and trip times must wait until it is your turn to speak with one of the attendants," the man said slowly as if he were reciting lines.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry. I really am. But this is kind of an emergency. Please, can you just tell me if the train is already gone? Or what platform it's leaving from?"

"Get back in line, man!" someone barked from behind him. "Wait your god damn turn like the rest of us."

"I-" Chuck's protest was cut short as the woman behind him shouldered her way to the desk and the attendant turned his attention to her, ignoring anything further from Chuck. Chuck was beginning to panic. He looked down at his watch. 7:08. He'd wasted nearly ten minutes already and was no closer to finding out if Sarah was even still in the station. Suddenly, a smartly dressed security guard approached him, tapping lightly on his shoulder to get his attention.

"Excuse me sir, is there something I can help you with?"

"Yes!" Chuck nearly shouted. "Yes, there is. Can you tell me if the train for D.C. has left already?"

The security guard led him to a split flap display on the far wall and pointed up at the words. Chuck scanned through the departures rapidly, his gut sinking as he caught the one he needed, its status reading _All Aboard_ in bright yellow text.

"Metro-North," he muttered to himself, bolting away from the security guard and towards the sign with the same name hanging over an archway. "Thank you!" he threw over his shoulder, even as the guard shouted after him that he needed a ticket. Chuck ignored him, focusing on dodging past the slow moving crowds, throwing apologies left and right as he knocked into various shoulders and bags.

He reached the terminal out of breath, continuing past a bustling pastry and coffee kiosk and ducking underneath the archway, just in time to see the train pulling out of the station.

"Wait!" Chuck cried, not sure who he expected to hear him. But he dashed after the train anyway, even as it picked up speed and people gave him odd looks from within the windows. The train pulled ahead, moving too quickly for Chuck to follow now and he stood at the very edge of the platform, panting hard, watching it disappear into the distance.

And just like that, she was gone. He'd missed his chance and he had no idea how he could find her now, even if he followed her to D.C. Chuck dropped his chin to his chest, running his hand through his hair and down his cheek, blinking to fight back the tears forming in his eyes. The terminal still bustled with people, some buying coffees, others finding their places on nearby benches as they waited for the next train, but Chuck walked past all of them without seeing. He trudged back through the halls, against the crowds, until he'd found his way back into the main concourse. His eyes ran across the thinning crowd of people, and that's when he saw her. Sarah was sitting on a bench against the far wall, her suitcase by her side, twisting a ticket between her fingers. Her eyes were locked on the split flap display, her expression grim, conflicted. And then they flitted away from the screen, somehow finding his from all the way across the lobby.

A dizzying array of emotions passed through Sarah all at once when she saw Chuck standing across the concourse, his eyes finding hers past the dozens of people milling around. For a moment, she was confused, taken aback that he'd come after her. She didn't think Chuck would have wanted to find her again after she left without an explanation. She'd hoped it would push him away, convince him that she wasn't worth following. Obviously she'd been wrong and, upon realizing that, Sarah couldn't quell the ecstatic little jump her heart made as Chuck began pacing towards her.

He'd come for her and, although it was difficult to see his expression from where she sat across the room, there was nothing in his demeanor to suggest that he was angry with her. But why not? He should be furious. He should have never wanted to see her again. He wasn't supposed to follow her, no one else would have. As he got closer, Sarah began to shake. He wasn't angry, that much was clear, in fact there was nothing but joy in his deep brown eyes and obvious relief reflected in the way he smiled at her. She felt sick. She'd made a mistake, again, but here he was, walking towards her with none of the emotions she'd expected to see. And Sarah had no idea what to do about it.

After a moment's hesitation, she rose from the bench and made her way towards him. The sparkle in his amber eyes was much clearer now that they stood only a few feet away from one another and Sarah couldn't stand to look at them. There was hurt there, but also happiness. Under any other circumstances, Sarah would have stood her ground and met his gaze with confidence, but now all she could do was stare at her shoes as guilt and shame washed over her.

"Chuck, I'm sorry," she murmured. "I wanted to come talk with you last night. But there was too much...I mean there wasn't...I'd said everything I had to say at the cafe, I wasn't sure what else you wanted to hear from me . I didn't know what else I _could_ say...I just thought it might be easier for you if you didn't have to see me again."

Sarah finished mumbling her apology and realized that Chuck was now standing over her, pinning her beneath his gaze. This time, she wasn't getting away without an explanation. Realizing that he wanted answers, Sarah resigned herself to try and explain why she'd left without talking to him at the hotel.

Suddenly, she felt a steady warmth against her cheek. Chuck had raised his hand to cup her face, running his thumb lightly along her jaw. Sarah couldn't find the strength to pull away from him, even though she knew she should. She leaned into his touch, closing her eyes, knowing that succumbing to the tender gesture was only going to make it harder to convince him that he should let her go. But she couldn't help herself. She'd spent so many months yearning for him, wishing she could make things right. And now that the opportunity was right in front of her, she was petrified. Chuck's hand slid down her cheek, his fingers curling underneath her chin and tilting it upward gently.

"Sarah, look at me." His voice was soft and so full of warmth that Sarah couldn't help but comply. "You don't have to apologize."

She finally looked up into his bright amber eyes and realized that there was no resentment there, even after her weak apology, only hurt and…..relief? But he was wrong, she had so much to apologize for. Sarah glanced quickly at the crowd milling around them, and then focused her attention back on him, straightening and squaring her shoulders to appear somewhat confident. "Look. I came to New York to apologize to you for what happened during the mission. But after what you told me at the coffee shop yesterday, about your company and Hannah and your family... Chuck, you're doing so well for yourself. You don't need me to complicate things for you."

Chuck remained silent, keeping his expression even and waiting for her to continue. His fingers still lingered near her chin, brushing lightly against her jaw. It was incredibly distracting. "I don't do _normal_ , Chuck. My life before I met you was difficult, to say the least. All of this success that you've worked so hard for is incredible, and you deserve it. I walked away last night because I'm only going to make things harder for you."

"That's not why you didn't show up last night," Chuck said suddenly, and his answer was so unexpected that Sarah was rendered speechless. "You'd already be on that train by now if that were true, Sarah."

He wasn't wrong. She hadn't gotten on the train. She'd been too conflicted. Leaving D.C., coming to find him, hoping he'd forgive her, everything had led to her standing in front of his hotel room and realizing that she had no right to step back into his life. There was too much baggage there that would drag him down. Sarah didn't know how she could explain that to him, so when a flash of frustration at the entire situation coursed through her, she used it to further fuel her argument.

"It is true," Sarah scoffed, frustration creeping into her tone. "I don't expect you to understand. But you can trust me when I tell you that I'm doing what's best for you. For both of us."

Chuck just shook his head, his hand finally moving away from her face and resting on her shoulder instead. Somehow, Sarah had managed to convince herself that she wasn't the reason for the changes Chuck had made in himself and his life. He wasn't sure he could convince her otherwise with just words. "I don't believe that. And I know you don't either. I do understand, Sarah. I know that this is huge...Kind of terrifying too. But if you really wanted to leave...You'd already be gone."

Sarah frowned when Chuck inched closer, and he noticed that she didn't back away. In fact, the closer he got, the more she seemed to lean towards him, stretching to her full height to try and match his. The words coming out of her mouth contradicted what her eyes and body told him.

"I can't give you what you want, Chuck."

"I want you." Chuck felt the words rise from somewhere deep inside. He'd convinced himself, when she left Burbank, that they weren't true. But they were, they always had been. Since the moment he'd met her in Malibu, he knew she was special. And every moment they'd spent together since, whether it was nursing his injured tailbone on a sunny beach, or infiltrating the office of an illicit terrorist, had only validated that feeling. He wanted Sarah in his life, no matter what the future held in store for them.

"You don't even know me," Sarah replied, but Chuck heard the hitch in her voice and saw the glassy shine in her blue eyes. She was wrong. He knew her better than anyone. She had no family, she had no friends, no CIA, no partner. By her own admission, he and Ellie were the closest things she had to a real family. It was obvious to Chuck now that she was looking for an escape, looking for a way to push him away. But he wasn't going to let that happen. He wasn't the same man she'd met on the beach a year ago. That Chuck would have turned and run. But this Chuck, the one that Sarah had helped create, wasn't going to let her push him away. So he said nothing. Instead trying to convey the thoughts running through his head with nothing but his eyes, which were still locked on Sarah's.

Sarah was waiting for him to argue, and when he didn't, he saw her confidence falter. Her shoulders fell and her breathing quickened. Her eyes, which had been so sharp and defiant, suddenly softened, flickering over his face and then dropping pointedly to his lips. That was all Chuck needed to decide to close the remaining space between them. He reached out, cradled her face in his hands, and crushed his lips to hers. Sarah tensed, more from shock than reluctance, and then he felt her relax against him, her own hands rising to clutch the front of his coat and tug him closer. Chuck didn't lessen the intensity of the kiss in spite of her compliance. He pulled her closer, brushing his tongue against her lower lip until she opened her mouth to his with a soft gasp.

Chuck realized that there must have been a dozen eyes on them at this point. A passionate kiss wouldn't go unnoticed in the middle of Grand Central Station, but he couldn't bring himself to care. She was here. He hadn't missed her. And she was kissing him back with a fervor he hadn't expected. Chuck broke the kiss and pulled away just far enough to rest his forehead against hers, keeping his eyes closed and listening to the sound of their uneven breaths. His heart was pounding against his ribs and his limbs trembled slightly. When he finally opened his eyes, he realized that she was already watching him, a mix of confusion and passion twisting her features. Chuck took a steadying breath, leaning his torso away from her so that he could get a better look at her face.

"Sarah," he began, running his hands from her cheeks down her shoulders and arms, until he'd reached her hands. He laced their fingers together, squeezing gently as he spoke. "I can't let this be the end. Not after everything you told me. We have a chance now. A chance to make this something real." Sarah was hanging on his every word. She looked a little bit terrified, Chuck noted, her breath still coming in short pants.

Sarah's mind was spinning; a whirlwind of confused emotions that threatened to consume her. Chuck's words were incredibly uplifting. He cared about her. He cared about her deeply and that, in part, was what Sarah found so terrifying. As wonderful as it would feel to give herself over to Chuck and the life he was promising, Sarah didn't know if she would be able to live up to his...or rather her own...expectations. A normal life meant so many things that she was afraid of, things she wouldn't be able to do well. She would have to lean heavily on Chuck to guide her and teach her. Would he have that sort of patience? How could he barely know anything about her and still want her to be a part of his life? How could he already be so devoted? And how was she ever supposed to return that?

"I've spent my whole life in the CIA," she said, as if that explained her fear. "I don't even know what normal looks like."

"Normal's overrated," Chuck said, with a small smile. "Look, Sarah, I don't want you to go back to D.C. I don't care what sort of past you've had, I don't believe there's anything you could tell me that would stop me from wanting you, just the way you are. I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what we could have had, not when we have a chance to really be together now. Whether you like it or not, you changed my life and I plan on returning the favor. I won't pretend I have all the answers, 'cause I don't. But I know we can figure this out. Together.

"I can't watch you walk away again. I want you to stay, Sarah. With me." Chuck ran his thumbs across her knuckles, taking note of the way her eyes glistened, reflecting the emotion building up in his own. "Will you stay with me? Can we try this again?"

She didn't respond right away, but just before she leapt at him, Chuck saw an enormous smile spread across her face. And he felt it when she pressed her lips to his again, throwing her arms around his neck for good measure. Chuck met her enthusiasm with his own, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her off the ground, laughing when she yelped in surprise. There was a cheer somewhere off to the side and another man whistled, but neither Chuck nor Sarah cared to acknowledge them. Chuck set her down on her feet again, contenting himself by peppering her lips and face with soft kisses instead. His arms tightened around her, pulling her close as she buried her face against the side of his neck. He could feel small tremors passing through her body as he held her. She was terrified, he knew that, but there had to be a part of her that wanted this as badly as he did. She would have gotten on that train and left without a backwards glance if she felt otherwise. He had faith that there was a reason their paths kept crossing. Now, they had a chance to be everything that Chuck knew they could be. So he hugged her tighter and swept a hand through her hair, trying to convey without words that he was here for her, he was determined to be her anchor as she navigated a life without the CIA.

They were interrupted by Casey, who was striding toward them calmly, a small smirk playing on his lips. Chuck straightened, beaming at Casey, and wove his arm around Sarah, pulling her against the side of his body where she found she fit almost perfectly.

"Walker," Casey said when he was close enough. "Good to see you again. Heard you gave up the agent gig."

Sarah nodded and glanced up at Chuck who met her gaze with a tender smile. Casey grunted and bobbed his head in a nod. "Good choice."

"Thank you, Casey," Chuck replied, although Sarah wasn't quite sure why he was thanking the former security guard.

Casey nodded again. "Not to ruin the reunion, but we do still have an appointment with the Head of Insomniac games this morning, Chuck. Being late might not make the greatest first impression."

"Oh!" Chuck slapped a hand to his forehead. "Oh my god...I completely forgot...Sarah, can you-"

"It's alright, Chuck," she interrupted before he could begin spiraling. "I'll meet you back at your hotel later."

Chuck nodded excitedly, handed her a copy of his key card and hurried towards the front of station with Casey. Suddenly, he hesitated, turned on his heel and bolted back to her, clutching her shoulders and planting a fierce kiss on her lips. He gazed into her eyes again and said, "We're going to make this work, Sarah. I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

When he pulled away and dashed towards Casey again, he made sure to throw her one more crooked grin over his shoulder that Sarah couldn't help but return, her entire body tingling and her legs a little wobbly from the brief but intense contact and his parting words. Her mind was still reeling, trying to take in everything Chuck had just said. Only one thing was certain now; there was no way in hell she was getting on that train.

 **The Wydham Hotel, NY, Suite 421: 1000 hours:**

Chuck ran down the hallway to his hotel suite, throwing open the door, his heart pounding with excitement. As soon as he opened the door however, he was met with an empty room and he felt as though a hole had just opened in his chest. For a second, Chuck allowed himself to believe she was gone. That she'd left him again, without an explanation, after letting him believe that she really cared. He took a step into the hotel room, closing the door behind him and struggling to keep the panic from overtaking him. Then his eyes landed on her suitcase, still leaning against the foot of the bed where she'd left it, and he heard movement coming from the bathroom. A second later, she appeared, her hair pulled up into a messy ponytail and her face scrubbed free of makeup. A brilliant smile lit up her face when she saw him standing by the front door, panting like he'd just run a marathon.

"You're back. How did it go?" Chuck didn't answer. Instead, he crossed the room in four long strides, closing the distance between them in a matter of seconds, and pulling her flush against him as he pressed his lips to hers. Sarah's hands found their way to his wrists and she curled her fingers around them, tilting her chin to deepen the kiss.

When Chuck pulled away, Sarah smiled at him teasingly. "Is this how all of our kisses are going to go?"

He chuckled breathlessly in reply and wrapped his arms around her waist, turning his face into her hair and breathing in the scent of her.

"I thought you'd left again," he murmured against her temple. Sarah braced her hands against his chest then, pushing him back far enough so that she could look him in the eye. In spite of the crooked smile on his face, Sarah could see genuine fear in his eyes. She raised her hand, cupping his cheek and forcing him to meet her passionate gaze. "Chuck I didn't get on the train. After everything that you said...I'm not walking out the door again."

"I know...It's just, after last night..."

Taking Chuck's hand, Sarah led him to the bed, plopping down in the middle of the mattress and gesturing for him to join her. He shrugged off his winter coat, letting it drop onto the floor in a messy pile and then crawled across the mattress on his hands and knees, lying down on his stomach next to where she sat and propping his chin on a pillow.

"I know it's probably hard for you to trust me after what I did last night. And...well, after everything really," Sarah began, fumbling with her fingers as she spoke. "It's just that, there's so much about my past that you don't know. Things that might change how you feel about me."

Chuck reached out for her hand, stilling her fingers and squeezing them gently. "Nothing could change that."

Sarah smiled at him, but there was obvious disbelief written on her face. "You say that now..."

"No, I'm serious," Chuck continued, scrambling into a sitting position so that he could better look her in the eye. "I know that I don't know a lot about you. But I want to learn. I want to be the one you can depend on to trust those things with, Sarah. That's what makes me so sure that we can make this work. I want to help you figure this 'normal life' stuff out."

"It won't be easy. I come with a lot of baggage, Chuck."

"Well, maybe I can be your very own baggage handler," Chuck replied with a slow grin. The double entendre wasn't lost on Sarah, and she snorted with laughter, doubling over and hiding her face in the crook of his neck and shoulder. Chuck joined in her laughter, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and pulling her closer still, relishing the way the warmth of her body felt against his own.

"I know it's not going to be easy," Chuck murmured into her hair after their laughter subsided. "No relationship is. The only thing that matters is that you're willing to fight for me just as hard as I'm going to fight for you. We can do it together, Sarah. Trust me." Sarah didn't reply right away, instead Chuck felt her brush her lips lightly against the inside of his neck and he shuddered in response. When she pulled back to look at him, Chuck could already see the decision in her eyes.

"I do."

 **December 21st, Burbank CA: 1900 Hours**

"Devon, honey? Are you almost ready? Chuck will be here any minute," Ellie called down the hallway to her husband, while she continued laying out her best china for dinner. Chuck had called her from the airport about an hour ago, telling her that he was on his way home and that he had great news regarding the trip to New York. Ellie was excited for her little brother and the progress he was making with his own company. She was even more excited that he hadn't fallen into another depressive spiral after ending things with Hannah. Luckily, it seemed that their break up had been rather mutual, and Chuck seemed just fine to continue focusing on his company rather than maintaining a relationship.

Ellie wasn't going to pretend she'd been truly sad to see Hannah go. She'd made her brother happy, but at the same time, Ellie had hardly known the girl. She hadn't been able to establish a personal relationship, and it made her a little wary. Ellie was protective of her little brother, she had been since both of their parents left the picture. And she always made it her personal goal to get to know any woman Chuck brought home in order to protect his heart.

Hannah had been nice-and nerdy-enough. The first time she'd joined them for dinner, she had polite, she had smiled and giggled at all of Chuck's jokes-so much so that Ellie had found it a little bit annoying after a while-but after she and Chuck had left, Ellie realized she wasn't excited by the prospect of her brother continuing to date Hannah. She would never say anything, of course, he was happy and she didn't want to ruin that. He needed someone, a woman specifically, that was a positive force in his life, especially while the stress of his burgeoning company threatened to overwhelm him.

But after they had left, and Devon asked her what she thought of Hannah, all Ellie could say was, "She's not the one." Devon looked confused, but Ellie couldn't explain it more than that. Chuck was obviously happy...or maybe content was the right word. She'd seen her brother truly happy before, truly in love, and the way he looked at Hannah wasn't the way he'd looked at...Ellie stopped. The realization hit her like a ton of bricks, and she'd sagged against the doorway, watching her brother close the door to his apartment after Hannah followed him inside.

Jill hadn't been the one, Hannah certainly wasn't the one either. It was as clear to Ellie now as it had been on the beach who the one for Chuck was. But she was long gone. How could she be the one Chuck needed if there was no hope of seeing her again?

"I'm coming, babe," Devon hollered back from their bedroom, drawing Ellie out of her thoughts. She moved to the small mirror hanging near the bookcase and checked her make up one more time. A few moments later there was a soft knock on the front door and Ellie hurried to open it. Chuck stood on the other side of the doorway, beaming at her and dropping his suitcase to pull her into a warm embrace. Ellie squeezed him back as best she could with her five-month pregnant belly between them. It was so good to see her brother give her his mega watt smile after all the hardship he'd faced over the last year.

"How was New York?" Ellie asked as they pulled apart. "Did you talk with anyone about the game?"

"Yup," Chuck beamed, nodding once. "We talked to the CEO of Insomniac Games. He and Casey are working out the details of a contract next week. It's really happening, Ellie."

"Chuck, that's fantastic! Come in, put your suitcase down by the couch, tell me everything." Ellie grabbed her brother's hand as she spoke, pulling him through the doorway into the apartment, but he drew back before she could get him all the way inside.

"Hang on, El," he chuckled. "That's not all that happened in New York."

"Oh?" Ellie watched her brother step back into the courtyard, still smiling, but much more softly now.

"Yeah, I met someone," he began, looking off to the side and reaching out a hand as if beckoning for someone to join him. He looked back at Ellie, a tender expression softening his features. "I think she's the one, El."

Ellie knew who it would be even before she saw the long blonde hair and the striking blue eyes. She knew who it would be before she saw the hesitant smile. Because, deep inside, Ellie had known for a year now who the one for Chuck was. As soon as Sarah took Chuck's hand and stepped into her line-of-sight, Ellie's jaw dropped.

"Hey, Ellie," Sarah murmured.

"Sarah. What are you...? Why are you...? I'm sorry, I don't understand."

Instead of answering right away, Chuck gestured for them to head inside. "That's okay, Ellie. It's a long story. Let's go inside and we'll explain everything."

 **o-o-o-o**

"So you quit?" Ellie asked, still trying to absorb the story that Chuck and Sarah had just taken turns telling. Devon sat beside her on the couch, looking just as bewildered as she felt, while Chuck sat on her other side and Sarah had taken the armchair nearby. "You're not a spy anymore?"

"No," Sarah replied. "I'm not a spy anymore."

Ellie frowned down at her lap. "But I don't understand. You left the CIA. Just like that?"

"I didn't make the decision lightly," Sarah assured her. "But after I spent time with you and Chuck, it was hard to feel like I belonged back at the CIA."

Ellie's eyes narrowed, still a little suspicious about Sarah's sudden return. "What do you mean?"

"I've never had a real family, Ellie. But you made me feel like I had one here, from the very beginning." Ellie searched Sarah's face for any sign of insincerity but there was none to be found. Sarah met her gaze unblinkingly.

"A family..." Ellie couldn't help but feel touched by that confession. "It was hard knowing that you'd lied to us, Sarah. But that was your job. Your life. You could go anywhere in the world and you pick Burbank to come back to?"

"I didn't come back to Burbank, Ellie." Sarah paused, her gaze flickering to Chuck who was watching her with silent admiration. "I came back to Chuck. You know, as amazing as it was to travel to Moscow, or Rome, or Athens for a mission, I really never saw those places. I was too focused on the job. Those places are only special if you have someone to share them with. Being a spy doesn't really lend itself to sight-seeing."

"No, I guess you're right about that," Ellie conceded with a chuckle. All of this felt a little surreal, and Ellie was still wary. Her gut told her that Sarah wasn't lying, but even still, there were dozens of questions Ellie had that would be better to ask when Chuck and Devon weren't around to hear.

"I wanted to apologize to you too," Sarah continued haltingly. "I never meant to hurt your or your family the way I did all those months ago, Ellie. I was so conflicted between doing my job and spending time with people who genuinely cared about me. I didn't really know how to handle that, and because of my hesitation I hurt you. I'm sorry for that, Ellie. I really am."

Ellie stood suddenly, crossing to the armchair Sarah sat in and pulling her to her feet. Sarah looked startled, even more so when Ellie pulled her into a crushing embrace. "Oh, Sarah, you are completely forgiven." Ellie pulled away, holding Sarah at arm's length and grinning at her baffled expression. "And I'm so glad you're back in Chuck's life. In all of our lives."

Sarah's face melted into a smile and she gazed down at Chuck who took her hand and kissed it softly. Ellie failed to contain her squeal as she watched the encounter. She clapped her hands together after a moment and pointed to the kitchen. "Dinner is getting cold and you guys have had a long trip, let's eat."

"Finally," Devon teased, hurrying to the table and plopping down in his chair. Ellie rolled her eyes at her husband's antics and gestured for Chuck and Sarah to take their places as well, following behind them so that she could watch the way her brother guided Sarah to the table with a gentle hand against the small of her back.

Ellie still needed answers, real answers. But she realized that this wasn't the time or the place. As soon as she could, she would get Sarah alone for a heart-to-heart conversation, and then Ellie would decide if it was really for the best that Sarah was back in Burbank. For now, she would use dinner to observe...

 **o-o-o-o**

It was late by the time Chuck and Sarah said their goodbyes to Ellie and Devon for the night and headed across the apartment complex to Chuck's place. The stars burned brightly in the velvet black sky, but the chill in the crisp December air made it hard for Sarah to concentrate on the beauty. She shivered and Chuck wrapped an arm around her, pulling her against him and pressing his lips to her temple, his nose brushing through her hair.

She leaned into him, warmed not only by his own body heat, but by the warmth blooming in her chest and spreading throughout her entire body.

"I'm glad you're here," he murmured against her temple and she turned her chin up to capture his lips in a lingering kiss. He smiled down at her after it ended, gazing at her with such adoration swimming in his brown eyes that it made Sarah's chest ache.

"I'm glad I'm here too," she replied, realizing just how true the statement was as she said it.

"You don't regret it yet?" Chuck teased, even though Sarah thought she saw a brief and very real flash of anxiety in his eyes.

"Nope," she shook her head and popped the 'p' playfully. "You're not getting rid of me that easily."

Chuck laughed. "Oh good, I was just going to tell you the same thing." He squeezed her shoulder again and led her inside the apartment, helping her lay her suitcase against the couch in the living room.

Chuck locked the front door behind them and then turned around to face her, looking a little nervous. "So, listen," he began, wringing his hands together while he spoke. "I know we're not exactly a normal couple, but we have only been official for a little over 24 hours. I completely understand if you'd like to take my room and I can sleep on the couch. Or we can go back over and ask Ellie if she'd mind you using the guest bedroom. Or-"

"Chuck?" Sarah interrupted, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning into her hip.

"Hm?"

"I didn't fly all the way across the world to catch you in New York and then spend another night sleeping alone."

Sarah watched Chuck's Adam's apple bob nervously, even as a tiny smile appeared on his lips. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah..." She strode towards him, her voice low and sultry. He watched her approach without moving, his eyes never leaving hers even when she came close enough to make him go cross-eyed. She leaned up, standing on her tip toes and bracing her hands against his chest, teasing him by ghosting a breath across his lips, making him tremble with anticipation beneath her fingertips. She couldn't help but smile before she kissed him, sliding her hands up his chest and into the curls he'd begun to grow out, tangling her fingers in them until he sighed with satisfaction. His hands found her hips and tightened around her as the kiss intensified. As badly as Sarah wanted him, right now, she knew Chuck would be more apt to take things slow, and surprisingly, that was fine with her. Even though the thought of being with Chuck had been in the back of her mind for over a year, they had all the time in the world, she knew that now. For tonight, she would let Chuck take the lead. He pulled away from the kiss, lingering close enough for Sarah to feel his uneven breaths brushing against her lips.

Chuck's fingers wandered underneath the hem of her shirt, finding the skin just above her hips. Suddenly his breath hitched and he moved away from her; as much as he could anyway, considering that he was pressed up against the front door.

"What is this?" he whispered, brushing his fingers over her skin again, making Sarah's heart skip a beat before dropping into her stomach. Slowly, she lifted the hem of her shirt, revealing the round, indented scar that still marred her abdomen and looked up at Chuck to see that his face had gone tight with pain.

"My last mission, before I came looking for you, didn't go quite as smoothly as I'd hoped it might," Sarah replied, hopeful that a teasing smile might assuage Chuck, but he just stared at her, agony etched onto his face. Sarah found it a little perplexing that he was so disturbed by the thought that she had been injured. No one had ever been that empathetic towards her before. "I spent a few days in the hospital. It gave me a lot of time to think...About you. And about what I wanted."

Chuck took a step closer, laying his fingers against the scar so lightly that Sarah could barely feel them there. "You were shot?"

Sarah searched his face, confused by the concern he continued to express over an old wound. "Yes. I was shot. But Chuck," she took his face between her hands and forced him to look away from her wound and into her eyes. "I'm okay, I'm right here. Nothing happened."

"But it could have," he said softly, his fingers still brushing over the scar. "What if you...hadn't made it to New York? What if the shot had been a little bit higher?"

"But it wasn't. And I _did_ make it," Sarah assured him, her hands sliding around the back of his neck to toy with the ends of his hair. "We've spent too much time on 'what if's' Chuck. We're both here now. And there's nothing stopping us anymore."

Chuck removed his hand from her abdomen, using it to stroke her cheek instead. "You're right. I'm sorry." He shrugged his shoulders and smiled sheepishly. "But, it's hard to imagine that you might not even be here right now if one little thing had been different."

"That's the trouble with being a spy," Sarah concurred. "There's really no guarantee of a tomorrow."

"I guess the likelihood's a little bit better here in Burbank, huh?" Chuck teased, his nose wrinkling. Sarah smiled and kissed him lightly.

"I'm banking on having a lot of tomorrows with you Chuck." Chuck's grin turned into a gaping yawn. He shook his head, covering his mouth with his fist and muttering a 'sorry' as best he could through the yawn. Sarah took his hand, grabbed her suitcase as well, and pulled him down the hallway to the bedroom. It was rapidly becoming clear to her that no matter how badly she wanted to spend the night exploring her and Chuck's newly established relationship, it would have to wait for now. They had plenty of tomorrows after all.

As obvious as she'd made it that she had no qualms about being intimate with Chuck, she was touched when he offered her the bedroom to change while he took his own set of pajamas to the bathroom. Of course Chuck would remain a gentleman about the situation and respect her privacy, and it moved her more than she thought it would. She'd never met a man who treated her this way, where such a small and subtle gesture meant so much. The thought that he cared that much send a warmth through her that she had never felt before. Was this what it felt like to be ….loved? She quickly dismissed that thought, not wanting to consider what that word even meant. The mere notion of it made her shake and break out into a cold sweat. Love meant commitment, it meant sacrifice, it meant pain and vulnerability and honesty, all things that Sarah had been trained her whole life to shun. She wasn't ready to consider the word in the context of whatever this was that she had with Chuck.

Chuck returned from the bathroom to find Sarah already tucked underneath the covers on the left side of the bed, she blinked up at him when he entered and he felt his heart swell at the sight of her, nestled comfortably in his bed. Sarah Walker was waiting for him….in his bed. Chuck shook his head to clear away the fairly inappropriate thoughts that went along with that realization. Turning off the lights, he swept the covers up and slid in beside her, lying on his back and blinking up at the dark ceiling. He could hear Sarah breathing quietly beside him and, when he chanced a glance at her, he saw that she was mimicking his position, staring up at the ceiling, her arms tucked across her chest.

"You comfortable?" he asked, trying to break the awkward silence that had fallen over them. "We can always switch sides if you want. I'm not really picky."

"What?"

"Sides of the bed. Morgan and Anna once had a really nasty argument over who got which side of the bed in their new apartment. It ended with Morgan getting neither side and spending the night on the couch instead." Chuck snickered to himself when he remembered Morgan recounting the story to him a few months ago during their lunch break at the Buy More. He looked over at Sarah who did not seem to be as amused by the story and was staring at him in confusion.

"Uh, anyway." Chuck cleared his throat. "I'm just saying, we can switch. If you wanted this side...Or if...I don't really know what I'm saying. This is ridiculous. Is this ridiculous? It is, isn't it?" Sarah finally cracked a smile and nodded her agreement.

"Yeah, it's a little ridiculous."

Chuck's grin softened into a gentle smile as he studied the happiness on Sarah's face. Moonlight drifted in through the windows, casting a gentle glow around the room that caught the amused sparkle in Sarah's eyes, and suddenly Chuck wanted nothing more than to be wrapped around her. Chuck reached out for her, lifting his arm and curling it around her shoulders when she shuffled across the mattress and into his embrace. Nothing had ever felt more right to Chuck than to have Sarah tucked perfectly against his side, her nose brushing against the sensitive skin of his neck and her hair tickling his cheek, her legs tangled with his own, and their feet tucked together. A sense of absolute calm fell over him as he draped his arm over her and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. Unbeknownst to him, Sarah was overwhelmed by the intimacy of this moment. It wasn't the physical connection between them that was rocking her to the core, but the untainted sense of trust and, dare she even think it, love, that flowed between them. She was allowing herself to be vulnerable with Chuck and his response was to cradle her close and reassure her, without words, that she was safe with him.

It was more than she could have ever thought to ask for. And in that moment, in spite of the anxiety and apprehension she'd experienced that morning, she knew she'd made the right decision in New York. After months of fruitless searching, she'd finally found her way back home.

* * *

 _Welcome to the other side of all the angst! Wow it feels good to be here. Thanks so much for all of the amazing support and for sticking through the rough patches! I certainly hope it was worth the wait._

 _Until next time..._


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N**_ **:** _I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me! Ah ha! Seriously though, my apologies for not making it more clear that this story is not yet complete. Hopefully, it has not overstayed it's welcome. But I have 7 chapters of angst to make up for! So we've got a few fluffy chapters incoming. Once again. can't thank everyone enough for the incredibly thoughtful reviews and kind words/support._

 _So let's get going on another chapter shall we?_

 _Warning : This chapter contains vague descriptions of sex. Love makin'. Intercourse. Whoopie. Fornication...and a lot of other dumb synonyms for sex. Anyway if you aren't a fan of that sort of content, feel free to skip the beginning of the chapter._

 _I hope you enjoy!_

* * *

 **December 22nd, Echo Park, CA: 0700 hours**

Sarah woke to a tickling sensation on the back of her right hand. She didn't open her eyes right away, instead lifting her hand slightly to gauge what it was that was rubbing against her skin. After a moment, she realized that what she felt was Chuck's fingers. They danced lightly across her skin, curled around her own fingers and squeezed gently, before starting the process all over again. Slowly, and with her eyes still closed, Sarah became aware of her other surroundings. There was an incredible warmth pressed against the length of her entire body, and she could feel steady, gentle puffs of air on the back of her neck that sent shivers down her spine. Chuck's chest rose and fell rhythmically against her back. He was still sound asleep in spite of the way his fingers stroked hers unconsciously.

Chuck's large feet were tucked against her own, and one of his legs had threaded itself loosely between hers. They were tangled together underneath the sheets, and although the contact was entirely innocent and probably accidental, Sarah had never shared such an intimate moment with another person before, and it felt…incredible. She was cocooned between the blankets and Chuck's warm body, and for something that was so unfamiliar and alien to her upbringing as an detached spy, she'd never felt more comfortable in her entire life. Suddenly, there was a hitch in Chuck's breathing and his entire body shifted away from hers, far enough for Sarah to feel the sudden lack of heat. She didn't move, but waited, hoping he would curl back against her, fearing instead that he might pull away and leave the bed entirely. Chuck was still for a minute, most likely becoming aware of their current position just as Sarah had, and then he leaned forward, his open mouth finding the soft skin of her neck. Sarah froze, expecting Chuck to grip her tightly, turn her over, and speed things along in a frenzy of pent-up passion. That was what she was used to in situations like this. But Chuck's ministrations stayed slow and sweet. He brushed her hair aside, exposing the slope of her neck and dragged his lips and teeth along her skin, soothing any nips he left with a soft brush of his tongue . Once he reached the juncture of her neck and shoulder, he sighed against her skin, and Sarah shivered in spite of the warmth of his breath, goosebumps rising along her entire body at Chuck's gentle caress.

The shudder made it clear that she was wide awake, but Chuck continued to explore her body without pause. One of his large warm hands crept underneath the hem of her camisole and pushed the fabric up past her hip. His long fingers slid down her abdomen, teasing the sensitive skin there with gentle circles. When she didn't object to the intimate touch, Chuck ventured a little further, dipping his fingers just beneath the waistband of her panties; he pulled away just as quickly, his warm palm splayed against the flat planes of her belly as his lips began to wander again. Sarah had never felt a more sublime tension taking over her body than she did now. She'd never been with anyone before who'd spent so much time discovering her most sensitive spots. Chuck's touch was gentle and also somehow simultaneously the most adoring and arousing thing she'd ever felt. Being touched like this, like she was the most precious thing in the world, wasn't something Sarah was familiar with. Especially not when it came to sex.

Sarah's mind continued to spin, unbeknownst to Chuck, who was now dropping kisses down the length of her arm. When the warmth of his mouth reached the sensitive dip of Sarah's waist, she found she couldn't hold still any longer. A lance of fire coursed through her body, and she squirmed around to face him. Chuck propped himself up on his forearms, shifting up her body so that they were face-to-face and she could see the unhindered passion darkening his beautiful eyes. A powerful tension crackled between them, each one waiting to see who would break the spell first and take the proverbial plunge. Chuck's gentle amber eyes locked on hers, a mixture of emotions swirling inside of them, mirroring what Sarah was sure could be found in her own gaze. In any previous circumstance, Sarah would have taken this moment to lunge at her partner, turn up the heat and the passion. But when she looked at Chuck's face, time seemed to slow and the need for him was tempered by the desire she felt to explore him just as tenderly as he had explored her. She leaned up, cupping his cheek and capturing his lips in a slow kiss. Chuck's hands wandered to her hips again, sliding underneath her cami and up her back until she was cradled in his embrace.

Sarah's heart hammered against her ribs as she allowed her own hands to wander. Chuck's hair seemed like a natural place to tease, and she found she was correct when she gripped a handful of his curls and tugged. Chuck released a hearty groan that vibrated against her lips. The sound made Sarah frantic, the apprehension that plagued her in New York coming back with a vengeance. It suddenly seemed possible that this was the only intimate moment she'd ever share with Chuck. She was still entirely convinced that she'd do something down the line to push him away for good, in spite of what he continued to tell her otherwise. She began to speed things along, a tinge of desperation in her movements. If this was the only time she'd ever get to act on her longing for Chuck, then she was going to make it happen before he had the chance to change his mind and tell her that things might be moving too quickly. Removing her hands from his hair, Sarah reached for the fabric of his shirt, bunching it in her fists so tightly that she realized later that she might have hurt Chuck in the process.

Sensing her sudden desperation, Chuck pulled away, and for a moment, Sarah was devastated that she'd already ruined the chance to explore the physical intimacy she'd wanted with Chuck for months now. But he didn't say a word. Instead, he stroked the backs of his fingers across her cheek, his eyes bright and full of compassion. His lips, still wet and enticing from the kiss, stretched into a small smile. Now sure that Sarah understood the pace he intended to set, Chuck met her lips again, this time in a much gentler kiss. The desperation that had fueled Sarah's actions up to this point began to dissipate and she sagged deeper into the mattress, loosening the grip she had on his shirt and sighing against his mouth.

Once Chuck felt her relax, he let his hands wander away from her face, down her shoulders and back, kneading the tension out of her muscles as he went. He reached her own hands and guided them to the hem of his shirt again, helping her lift it up and over his head. The fabric caught in Chuck's hair, leaving it mussed and wild, and Sarah couldn't help but smile at how adorable he suddenly looked. She ran a hand through his curls to smooth them and then cradled the back of his head, pulling him back down. She felt him smiling too, and it struck her as odd that this intense and heated moment between them was also laced with joy and tenderness. It wasn't like any intimate situation she'd experienced before. What was most confusing for Sarah was her own contentment with the unhurried pace Chuck had set. She knew where this intimate exploration was headed. But Chuck was in no rush to get there. In fact, Sarah had a sneaking suspicion that if they were interrupted before anything could happen, Chuck would be entirely satisfied with the fact that they'd spent the morning exchanging passionate kisses. But there was no way in hell that was going to be enough for Sarah. And if they were, god forbid, interrupted any time soon. Whoever or whatever it was that ruined her morning with Chuck was going to face her unbridled wrath.

Chuck fingers trailed down her sides, leaving fire in their wake, and lingered at the bottom her camisole. He shifted to allow her room and Sarah followed his lead, rising off the mattress far enough to pull the camisole off of her body. It was quickly followed by her lace bra and once both had gone, Sarah sat back against the headboard and met his soft eyes. A wave of apprehension passed through her as Chuck's eyes left hers and took in the sight of her naked torso. She watched his gaze darken and his breath hitch, but the moment of obvious lust didn't last long. His eyes snapped back up to hers and in a voice so soft and sincere that it made Sarah weak, he whispered, "God, you're...breathtaking." Words she'd heard before. But coming from Chuck's mouth, coupled with the adoring look in his eyes, they moved Sarah to her very core. Because it was so clear that he meant them. Deeply. He bore his heart to her with those simple words. Sarah smiled in response and crawled forward, settling herself on his lap and kissing him again. She ran her hands down his surprisingly defined chest and abdomen, discovering parts of him that she'd fantasized about for so long while his own hands traced patterns up and down her back.

For as long as she'd been a spy, sex for her had been nothing more than a release of adrenaline. Sometimes it was also a tool. The Farm had given her more than enough information about the power that sex, or rather the feigned promise of sex, gave her over her marks. And coming back after a long mission, keyed up, tense, lonely, there was nothing more cathartic than finding a partner as enthusiastic as she was to find a physical release. There had never been any emotion involved in any of those prior meetings. There didn't need to be. More often than not, her fellow agents had been the ones she coupled with to scratch the proverbial itch. They, like her, understood the need and didn't desire the emotional intimacy. It was dangerous, it could lead to trouble during a mission. Sarah always left before the room had a chance to cool. There was no chance for an emotional connection. It had simply never occurred to her that sex could be this; someone worshipping her with sincerity and affection. Wanting her for who she was, not just using her for a release. And not just for her body either. Sarah knew she was attractive, she worked hard to maintain her appearance and physique. But Chuck's eyes had only wandered once. Now, when they opened, they strove to meet hers. The intense eye contact was a little off-putting at first, his gaze was so open and sincere, and Sarah wasn't sure what he would see in her own eyes if he looked for too long. The anxiety was fading, though, the longer they held one another and soon enough, Sarah began yearning for that incredibly intimate connection again. When he granted it and gazed up at her with his tender brown eyes, she couldn't keep the beaming smile off of her face.

Somehow, in the midst of the continuous kisses and touches and Sarah's introspection, they had divested themselves of the rest of their clothes, and when there were no more barriers between them, Sarah felt her head beginning to spin, her breath coming in sharp pants. Every sense was connected to Chuck. She could feel the strength of his body-his powerful muscles underneath his unassuming physique. She felt the smattering of hair on his chest pressed deftly against her own and his lips drifting slowly across her jaw and neck. She could hear the quiet whispers of her name that he ghosted in her ear. Smell the clean scent of his soft curls and feel the heat rising from his smooth skin. She was spinning and he was her center of gravity, the one thing piercing the inertia and keeping her from floating away.

When Chuck's long fingers gripped her hips and squeezed, Sarah wasted no more time. She sunk down onto his lap, onto him, slowly, a low moan passing her lips as they joined. Chuck's deep brown eyes were hooded, his lips parted to make way for his quiet pants. He didn't move at first, most likely savoring the sensation just as much as she was. But then he pressed his body closer to hers, wrapping his arms around her and nudging her nose with his own, finally closing his mouth over hers and beginning to rock his hips up into her.

Sarah's breath caught in her throat and she gripped Chuck's biceps to steady herself, already feeling her body begin to shake. It wasn't just the physical connection between them that was responsible for the steady pressure building inside of her, but the way Chuck continued to cradle her as they moved together. No matter what she did to shift against him, he mirrored her actions, caressing her with his large hands and soft lips. When his eyes found hers, she saw they were filled with a hazy desire and affection, for her, and it melted Sarah's heart, stripped her of her defenses. She was lost in his eyes, something she'd never imagined would capture her so thoroughly. She leaned forward, pressing her forehead against his, letting her eyes slip shut as they moved together. Relaxing her white-knuckled grip on his upper arms, Sarah rounded his shoulders with one arm and used her free hand to tug gently on his wild curls.

She didn't expect Chuck's enthusiastic reaction. He gasped at the sensation of her hand tangled in his hair and suddenly, Sarah felt her world spin, and, before she had a chance to understand what had happened, she felt the rumpled sheets against her back and Chuck hovered above her, his eyelids fluttering shut and his lips finding her jaw. The agent in her screamed for the upper hand when she realized that she was quite literally pinned beneath someone far larger, and possibly more powerful than she was; putting her in a precariously vulnerable position. But then Chuck's lips opened against the sensitive spot just below her ear and he breathed her name reverently, and Agent Walker disappeared. She had no reason to be afraid, she realized. She could trust him, absolutely, she always had.

Sarah clutched his broad shoulders, encouraging his movements by digging her nails into his skin and rolling her hips in time with his thrusts to bring him deeper. In the past, when Sarah had shared her bed with fellow spies, she'd found it somewhat useless and a little bit uncomfortable to voice her pleasure. There was often little more than the sound of the bed creaking and mingled pants, occasional groans. But now, she couldn't hold back the gasps of pleasure and even found Chuck's name on the tip of her tongue. The sound of her voice seemed to encourage him. She could feel shivers pass through him every time she moaned his name. Pressing her lips against his ear, she ran her hands over the muscles in his back as they strained and flexed. Sarah could feel her climax building, but she didn't want this moment to end. This moment, where her whole world revolved around the man above her, making her feel like this was the first time she'd ever been touched. It was new, it was incredible and it was breaking down every wall she'd built around her heart to protect it.

When Sarah's climax did come, it hit her like an avalanche, powerful and intense at first and then rolling through her entire body in a series of slow, earth-shaking waves. She arched off the bed, clinging to Chuck like a lifeline and gasping his name as her body trembled and shook beneath his. Chuck was not far behind her. He tensed and then shuddered, pressing his face against the curve of her neck and moaning her name so that it vibrated against her skin.

Then he collapsed, his body draped halfway across hers, his panting breath cooling her heated skin. Sarah could only stare up at the ceiling as she tried to regain her senses. Her hands wandered over Chuck's back wantonly, stroking, caressing any part of him that she could reach. She could feel the rapid beating of his heart thrumming against her own chest. For as hard as she was trying to regain her breath, they only seemed to be coming more quickly, her eyes and throat beginning to burn. And then, before Sarah knew what was happening, she felt tears running down her cheeks. Chuck felt the hiccup in her breathing from where he lay with his cheek pressed against her chest and bolted upward, bracing his palms on either side of Sarah, looking down into her face.

"Oh god, Sarah. Are you okay? I'm so sorry. Did I-" He trailed off, looking terrified, his eyes wide and round, his brows twisted and his lips trembling slightly. Sarah could only shake her head, the fact that he was so concerned for her comfort and safety making the tears fall faster. She reached up to cup his cheeks, bringing his face down to hers and giving him a gentle kiss.

Chuck pulled away, still looking confused, and then dropped onto his elbows to be closer to her. He waited patiently for her to find her voice, wiping the tears away with his thumb and smoothing her hair back out of her face. Finally, Sarah calmed herself enough to speak. She reached up with both hands, stroking Chuck's face and then sliding them around the back of his neck, through his hair, as she spoke.

"Sorry," she began, her voice still a little shaky.

"You okay?" There was still concern present in Chuck's tone and in the way his eyes softened as he looked at her. "I didn't hurt you, did I? Should we not have-? I'm so sorry. It was too fast, wasn't it? I didn't mean to push you, Sarah. I should have asked, or said something. God...I'm such an idiot. I'm sorry. I-"

Sarah shook her head quickly. "No, Chuck. It's not that. It's just..." She paused, not sure how to explain that what they'd just done was something she'd never experienced before. Chuck wouldn't judge her for that confession, she knew that much. But it still felt odd to say it aloud. It made her vulnerable. She had to chuckle at that thought as if there were any way she could be more vulnerable than she was right now. "I've never done that before."

Chuck's brows furrowed, a thin line appearing between them. "You've never..." He trailed off again, a pink blush rising on his cheeks. Sarah found it both amusing and adorable that he could be so shy when he was still lying naked on top of her.

"Made love to someone," she finished for him. "Someone that I...care about as much as you." Chuck was silent, taking in her words, and the intensity of his gaze made Sarah flush. Then he smiled tenderly, his brown eyes crinkling at the corners. Nuzzling her cheek, he rolled to the side to take his weight off of her. He stayed close though, stretching the length of his body against hers and propping himself up on his elbow, resting his cheek on his closed fist and splaying his other hand out against Sarah's smooth stomach. He began drawing lazy patterns on her skin, making it jump and tremble underneath his touch.

"Me neither," he replied finally, his voice quiet. Sarah turned her head to look at him, confusion wrinkling her brow. It didn't make sense to her that a man like Chuck, who wore his heart on his sleeve, would have never experienced what they just had with another woman.

"What do you mean?" she blurted, realizing too late that Chuck might not be comfortable sharing intimate information.

"What do you mean, 'what do I mean'?"

"I mean, what about Hannah? Or your girlfriend from college? Didn't you ever..." Sarah stopepd. She wasn't sure what was provoking her to dig into Chuck's past, especially his past with other women; knowing that she wouldn't be as tolerant if Chuck were to ask her the same question.

"Well, yeah," Chuck said, catching on to her train of thought. He made himself more comfortable, dropping down onto the pillow beside her, his fingers still moving across her belly, tracing circles now around her scar. "I was...uh," Chuck blushed again, "intimate, with both Jill and Hannah...But that wasn't what I meant when I agreed with you."

Chuck shuffled closer, tucking his feet against hers and letting his hand slide across her abdomen to hook around her waist and pull her against him. "You said you've never made love to someone that you care about as much as me." Sarah could feel Chuck's heart beat thrumming against her skin again, like he was nervous...or perhaps exhilarated by what he was about to say. "I told you, me neither. Because I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you, Sarah. No one even comes close."

His words flooded Sarah's body with a tingling warmth. She still wasn't sure what Chuck saw in her that made him want her so much, but this feeling of being completely and unconditionally loved was unparalleled. The tears pricked at her eyes again and she buried her face in Chuck's chest to hide them. She lay there while he stroked her hair, listening to the steady thump of his heart and soaking in the warmth of his lean body.

"You're only saying that because we're in an extremely compromising position right now," Sarah said finally, trying for a bit of levity. Chuck didn't take the bait like she'd expected. He slid his fingers beneath her chin, lifting her face and brushing his lips against hers.

"That's not why I'm saying it." He looked down at her, his brown eyes deep and earnest. "It's the truth. I mean it."

Sarah's heart skipped a beat. It was strange how Chuck could move her so deeply with just his words and expressive eyes. He was disarmingly honest when it came to his feelings, and Sarah wished she could be just as candid with him. Instead, she kissed him, stroking his jaw with the tips of her fingers.

"Chuck," Sarah said, when they had pulled apart and settled back onto the pillows.

"Yeah?"

"...I'm really hungry." Chuck blinked, processing her words, and then he rolled onto his back and burst out laughing. Sarah couldn't help but beam back, his laughter was infectious. It was true, though. She was starving. She hadn't eaten much the previous night when she and Chuck had dinner with Ellie and Devon. Ellie had kept a piercing gaze on her the entire time, and it made Sarah a little too nervous to enjoy the food.

"I'm so glad you said that!" Chuck replied after his laughter had died. "Because I am too. Come on, I'll treat you to breakfast at Bistro Bartowski." He scrambled out of bed, throwing on his discarded boxers and t-shirt and searching for Sarah's clothes. He handed them to her almost timidly, and Sarah once again found it amusing how bashful he was about handling her underwear.

"Thanks."

He grinned crookedly and blushed, "Sure. Um, I'll let you get dressed." Then he was gone, the door swinging shut behind him with a soft click. After he'd gone, Sarah looked down at her flimsy camisole and pursed her lips. The December weather wasn't as frigid as it had been in New York, but still there was a chill in the air, and the camisole wasn't going to do much to combat it. Sarah stood and wandered to the nearby bureau. Opening the top drawer, Sarah shuffled through the rows of nerd-related t-shirts Chuck owned. She wasn't sure how important these shirts might be to Chuck, maybe they were for looking at, not wearing. Nerds did that sort of thing, right? Closing the drawer, Sarah looked up towards the closet and saw one of Chuck's long-sleeved white work shirts hanging from the door hook.

 _Perfect._

Sarah slipped the shirt over her head. The hem fell to her upper thighs and the sleeves were too long, but the material was soft and smooth and it smelled like Chuck. Plus, it was thick enough to keep her warm in spite of the wintry weather outside.

Finally, Sarah left the bedroom and followed the sound of clanging pots and pans down the hallway until she'd reached the kitchen. Chuck set a frying pan down on the stove top and turned around towards the fridge. He paused mid-stride when he saw her standing in his white shirt, her golden hair a little disheveled and her blue eyes bright and wide. She couldn't have looked less put together, but in that moment, Chuck thought he'd never seen anything so beautiful.

"Hey-o," he breathed out, and Sarah's amused grin finally brought him back to his senses.

"I borrowed your shirt." She lifted her shoulder slightly in a way that made Chuck's knees feel a little weak.

"Looks a lot better on you than it does on me." And Chuck was only partially kidding. But Sarah always looked gorgeous. She could be wearing a potato sack for all Chuck cared and he'd still find her irresistible. It wasn't just how she looked in the shirt that made him happy, he realized, but the fact that she was wearing his clothes at all. It made everything between them seem real. Good thing too, because Chuck was still convinced he hadn't really woken up this morning and this was all a wonderful, impossible dream.

"So!" Chuck cleared his throat and dragged his eyes away from her back to the contents of the fridge. "What are you in the mood for? I make a mean scrambled egg."

"I'm not picky." For some reason, Chuck felt like that wasn't at all true when it came to Sarah Walker.

"Famous last words," he teased with a wink. Gathering his ingredients and setting them by the heated skillet, Chuck was about to suggest to Sarah that she take a seat at the dining room table to relax while he cooked, but she was suddenly at his side offering to help and Chuck couldn't find it in himself to tell her no.

After a while, Chuck was glad she'd offered. As he began cooking a few eggs in the skillet, Sarah stood nearby, dicing various fruits and starting up the coffee maker. Her hip and shoulder brushed his every now and again, making his heart race with every touch. It was a strange feeling for Chuck, to realize that he had a former CIA agent helping him cook breakfast in his apartment; the domesticity of it all was comforting and Sarah was falling into the rhythm perfectly. If it weren't for the way she sliced up a bowl of strawberries with terrifying precision, no one would have guessed that she wasn't just a normal girl, sharing breakfast with her boyfriend.

Chuck was so enthralled watching her that he didn't notice he was burning the eggs until they began sizzling angrily. He yelped and wrenched the skillet off the heat, holding it as far away from himself as he could without dropping it. Sarah looked at him quizzically and Chuck felt a sheepish blush rising up the back of his neck.

"Sorry, a little distracted this morning..."

A coy grin crept onto Sarah's face, and she resumed cutting fruit with feigned nonchalance. "What's so distracting?" She leaned into one hip as she spoke, the fabric of Chuck's shirt shifting up and revealing her long toned legs. The only thing more remarkable than Sarah's body this morning was her attitude. Chuck would have been lying to himself if he did not admit that he'd half expected that he'd wake up in an empty bed. After Sarah expressed her fears to him in New York, he couldn't shake his own insecurity that she might leave him when he was asleep, unable to stop her or talk her out of it. It confused him to no end that Sarah couldn't see her own worth as a person, not a spy. Waking up curled against her body, a blend of soft curves and powerful muscle, Chuck had never felt so happy, so relieved that she was still there. And god, the way they'd made love to one another to so easily, as if they'd been fighting a tenet of nature by denying each other.

Realizing that Sarah was still waiting for a reply, Chuck gulped audibly and shook his head to clear it. He was determined to keep up with her wit this morning, and that was going to require a cool head. "Oh, you know. I'm just not used to having such gorgeous company in the kitchen. I mean, there's Morgan of course, but he's just a little less gorgeous than you. I think it's the beard, honestly. Takes him down a few pegs in my book."

Sarah gaped at him over her shoulder until she realized he was joking, and by then she was too distracted to continue with the seductive game she'd been playing. She chuckled when Chuck beamed at her and shook her head. "You're such a dork."

"Nerd," he corrected, scooping the pile of eggs out of the skillet and onto two plates. "If you're going to insult me, I prefer nerd."

"Nerd it is," Sarah replied, turning around to face him. "But it wasn't an insult." The playful atmosphere dissipated as Chuck met her gaze and she moved towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck and rising up on her toes to meet his lips with hers. Chuck was starving, they both were, and he could hear her stomach growl even while they continued to exchange soft kisses. But right now, he wanted nothing more than to stay in this moment forever. This moment that was nothing but the two of them; real, open, honest and full of unspoken love.

Breakfast went by quickly, and before Chuck could ask if Sarah would like help unpacking her things, his phone rang. Chuck glanced quickly at the caller ID before answering.

"Hey, buddy, what's up?...Yeah, I got back last night." He paused, pointing to the phone and mouthing 'Morgan' to Sarah, who nodded and gathered up their plates, taking them to the sink while Chuck went back to his phone call. "Problem at the office? I can come down if you really need me..."

Chuck had given his employees the week off for the holidays but it didn't surprise him that a few had chosen to get in an extra day or two while he was away in New York. A few, namely Jeff and Lester, didn't have families to celebrate Christmas with and to them, getting in a few more hours of holiday pay probably sounded like a better deal.

Ending the call with Morgan, Chuck stood up from the dining table and threw an apologetic glance at Sarah. "Looks like the guys need me down at the office for a little bit." Suddenly his expression brightened and he stepped around the counter to join her in the kitchen. "You can come if you want to. See the office."

"Sure," Sarah replied with a bounce of her shoulders. Being back in Burbank meant following Chuck's lead, and after the intimacy they'd shared not an hour earlier, she didn't plan on leaving his side today.

"Great!" Chuck beamed, and then his expression fell just as quickly and his brows drew together thoughtfully. "So...We should probably get ready then. You can use the shower first if you want. Or I'll go, I can be quick, and then you can take all the time you need. Or we can-"

"Chuck," Sarah interrupted, placing a hand on his chest to quiet him. He looked down at her hand and then up at her, catching the amorous glint in her eye. "This could be a lot less complicated if we just showered together...Don't you think?" Chuck's lips parted and then lifted into a crooked grin. He looked torn between jumping for joy and dragging her down the hallway and hesitation, curious to know if she was serious or just teasing him. Sarah took a step closer, pressing herself against him and touching her lips to his, lingering long enough for her to feel his heartbeat speeding up underneath her palm.

"That's incredibly economic of you," he said, a little breathless, and Sarah couldn't help but giggle. Casting a final coy glance at him, she stepped around Chuck and headed down the hall, throwing a little extra sway into her hips as she walked. Chuck's jaw went slack as Sarah began unbuttoning his work shirt on the way to the bathroom. He stood rooted to the spot, gawking, as she disappeared around the corner, shrugging the shirt off of her shoulders at the last moment and letting it pool on the floor. It wasn't until she peeked back around the corner of the door and beckoned for him to join her with a crook of her finger that Chuck was able to rewire the short circuit in his brain. He scurried down the hall, stumbling over himself in his rush to get to her, and then again when his feet tangled in the shirt she'd abandoned. When he finally reached the bathroom door, he saw Sarah's coy smile fade into something more adoring, her deep blue eyes shining with emotion she couldn't put into words. Stepping into the bathroom, Chuck closed the door, and gently pulled her naked body against his clothed one. He covered her lips with his, feeling her smile fade as the passion swept them both away.

 **o-o-o-o**

The drive to Chuck's office downtown wasn't far. In fact, Sarah felt it went by almost too quickly. Chuck rolled the car windows down and turned on the radio, glancing over at her once in a while as he sang along to the songs wafting from the stereo. Every time their eyes met, his lips would curl into an irrepressible grin and he'd chuckle nervously, return his attention to the road, only to do it all over again.

By the time they reached his office building, Sarah felt like she was floating and they'd done little more than exchange glances. Chuck parked the car and led her inside the building. There was a large desk at the back of the main lobby that looked like a security desk of sorts. From what Chuck had told her about his company thus far, Sarah assumed it was where Casey normally resided. But, it was empty now as Casey-unlike Jeff, Lester, and Morgan-was probably taking full advantage of his time off. Sarah assumed he might also be tired from the trip to New York and back. Leading her away from the lobby, Chuck took her down a narrow hallway to a door with his name emblazoned on a golden plaque. He unlocked the door and threw it open with a flourish.

"Here we are!" Chuck strode into the small office, taking Sarah's hand and guiding her inside. "What do you think?"

The office was small and a little bare; only a few steps in and Sarah already felt like she'd seen all there was to see. Chuck's desk sat in the middle, crowded with two computer screens and a desktop unit underneath. There were a few picture frames showing Ellie, Devon, and Morgan, and some figurines scattered across any space they would fit. But the walls were empty, off-white and a little dingy, and the small bookcase on the left side of the room only held a few books and DVDs. It was small, not really something to brag about. But still, Sarah could see how proud Chuck was of the space. After all, it was a start for his company, no matter how small and it was Chuck who had organized it all up to this point.

"Kind of empty, I know," he said, watching her walk around the room. "But I don't really spend that much time in here. I have to check up on the other guys too often to get my own work done."

"It's nice," Sarah said, reaching down and picking up a picture of Ellie and Chuck grinning goofily at the camera. "I like it."

Chuck beamed at her, his smile practically lighting up the room. He opened his mouth to say something when a soft knock from the doorway drew their attention. Sarah set down the picture frame and looked up to see a tall, slender, young woman standing in the doorway. She wore a black pantsuit that accentuated her lean figure, and her long brown hair fell in waves past her shoulders. She smiled at Chuck with a row of straight white teeth and fluttered her long eyelashes.

"Mr. Bartowski, I hope I'm not interrupting. I didn't know you were already back from New York. How was the trip?" Sarah was tempted to jump in and tell the strange woman that she was, in fact, interrupting, but Chuck spoke before she could.

"It was great!" he said. "In fact, I need you to keep an eye out for a contract from Insomniac Games. The CEO told Casey and me he'd sent it over within the next few days."

"Of course, sir," the woman said with another flirtatious smile and a jolt of anger flared in Sarah's chest.

"Is there a reason you're here today?" Chuck asked suddenly. "You got the email about time off, right?"

"I did," the woman replied, leaning against the doorway and popping her hip. Sarah narrowed her eyes and glanced at Chuck, who thankfully, hadn't seemed to notice the gesture. "But I decided to come in to keep an eye on the guys. Mr. Patel and Mr. Barnes have been trying to take over pieces of the project that weren't assigned to them while you were gone. Mr. Grimes wasn't having it and some minor tantrums were thrown... So I've been stopping in to put out fires for the past few days."

"Jeffster. Gotcha." Chuck rolled his eyes. "Thank you for keeping the guys in check, Courtney. Dunno what I'd do without you."

"Don't mention it." Courtney gave him a playful wink. Deciding that she'd had enough of the banter, Sarah cleared her throat, drawing both Courtney and Chuck's attention.

"Hi," she chirped, stepping around Chuck and holding her hand out towards the young woman. "I don't think we've met. I'm Sarah."

Courtney's brown eyes flashed warily, flickering to Chuck momentarily, and then back to Sarah. She threw on a saccharin sweet smile and accepted the handshake. "Courtney Fischer. Nice to meet you."

"Sorry, Sarah," Chuck said. "I should have introduced you two right away. Courtney's our production assistant, she acts as a liaison between all the departments. She's been a big help around here." Courtney smiled again and every muscle in Sarah's body tensed, but Chuck continued without pause. "Courtney, this is Sarah. She's-"

"-Chuck's girlfriend," Sarah finished, plastering on a phony smile of her own. Sarah was sure Courtney had already surmised their relationship, but it wouldn't hurt to make it clear that Courtney had no business flirting rampantly with Chuck anymore.

Courtney got the message loud and clear. She nodded politely to both of them and took a step out of the office, asking half-heartedly if they needed anything from her. When they declined, Courtney ducked out of the office and disappeared down the hall, throwing one last hasty glance at Sarah over her shoulder.

Sarah shut the door behind her, a little too hard, and when she turned around to face Chuck, a glint of apprehension in his wide eyes.

"You...okay?"

"Fine," she said, voice clipped. "Who was she?"

"...Our production assistant?" Chuck's tone lilted upward into a question.

"I heard that part. But who _was_ she?" Chuck's brow wrinkled and he pursed his lips and Sarah struggled to not be distracted by how adorable he looked. "Did you two ever have," Sarah waved her hand around, looking for the right word, "...a thing?"

Chuck's brows popped upward. "What? No! I hired her last month. Seriously, she's just the office assistant. Kind of like a glorified secretary. What gave you the idea that we ever had," he paused and wrinkled his nose as if he'd smelled something awful, "a thing?"

Sarah's mouth fell open. It continued to surprise her that a man as intelligent and sensitive as Chuck could be so obtuse when it came to subtleties...Or women, specifically. "Seriously? Chuck, she was flirting with you."

"She was?" Chuck frowned, looking genuinely confused. "No, she's just nice. She's like that with all the guys."

Sarah scoffed. "You mean she flirts with everyone?"

Chuck raised a finger and opened his mouth to respond, but paused, lowered his hand and tipped his chin thoughtfully. "Huh...now that you mention it...I guess, I just never noticed it."

Sarah cocked a brow at him and crossed her arms. Catching the angry look in her eyes, Chuck straightened and took a tentative step towards her. "Are you mad at me?"

"No." Sarah's reply was too quick to be convincing. Chuck narrowed his eyes at her and Sarah felt heat rising along the back of her neck. "I'm not. I'm not mad at anyone. I just think it's ridiculous that your secretary would flirt with you so shamelessly. It's entirely unprofessional."

"Sarah."

"I'm not mad." Chuck obviously wasn't convinced and it irritated Sarah that only now he was perceptive of her feeling. He reached out and took her hand, forcing her to drop her arms to her sides and follow him as he walked them both backward, stopping when his legs hit the desk and perching himself on top of it. He took her other hand now and pulled her closer, their thighs brushing as Sarah stood between his legs.

"Need I remind you how we spent this morning?" Chuck asked softly, running his hands up and down Sarah's forearms. "Do you really think that after that, I'd come to work and flirt with my secretary? A woman I don't even know? With you in the room? You know me, Sarah. I'm not that type of guy. I never will be."

"It wasn't you I was worried about. It was her," she replied, leaning into his touch as he continued to stroke her arms. She looked down at her hands, resting on Chuck's thighs, and then peered up at him through her lashes. "I've never been in a relationship like this one before. I guess I jumped to conclusions. I'm sorry." Jealousy was a new emotion for Sarah, and she knew she didn't have the right to be. For as long and complicated as her relationship with Chuck had been up to this point, for her to feel like she had some sort of claim on all of his attention was ridiculous...and selfish. She knew that. And still, it made her angry just thinking of the way Courtney's eyes had roamed over Chuck's body.

The corner of Chuck's mouth lifted into a smile but his eyes were soft, and a little hurt. When they locked on hers, his hands stopped stroking her arms and slipped around her waist instead. "I don't know how I can convince you that you're the only one I see. I don't want anyone else, Sarah. I am completely and wholly yours."

Sarah's heart fluttered at his words and she flushed in spite of herself. Ever since returning from New York, there was a nagging fear in the back of her mind that what she had with Chuck would end in the blink of an eye. All it would take was one mistake, like the one she'd just made by overreacting and being ridiculously jealous. But over and over again, he told her how much he wanted to be with her, and as much as she wanted to keep up a healthy cynicism, his constant sincerity was winning her over. At the same time, Sarah was a little disappointed in herself for reacting the way she had. She'd never been the jealous type...Or at least, she'd never had anyone in her life worth being jealous about. It had been petty of her to react to Courtney's innocent flirtation so aggressively. But she couldn't help herself. She felt like she was barely holding onto Chuck as it was, even with everything he'd said to her at the train station. She'd only been in Burbank one day. How was she going to survive this on a regular basis? There was still a chance she'd screw up. And already there were women around, in Chuck's day-to-day life, that would be there to swoop in the second Sarah left the picture. Women that were probably far more deserving of Chuck's attention than she was.

"Okay," she said finally, surprised by the shyness in her own voice. She wanted to tell him that the same was true for her, but the words stuck in her throat. So she leaned forward and kissed him instead, savoring his soft lips against hers and his large warm hands that drifted gently across her back and down to her waist, gripping her hips and pulling her further into him. His touch sent sparks through every nerve in her body.

"Hey," Chuck said suddenly, pulling back from the kiss. "You told Courtney you were my girlfriend."

Sarah felt a flush of embarrassment, although she wasn't sure why. It was true, wasn't it? She'd never used the word before in the context of her relationships...She and Chuck weren't about to get married tomorrow, but they weren't just a casual fling either.

"Yeah..." She trailed off, waiting for his reaction. Chuck's lips twisted into a smile that he couldn't suppress.

"I liked hearing you say that," he explained, running his hands along her. "That's all."

"I kinda liked it too," Sarah murmured, pausing for a second before she lunged at him again. The door was closed, the building mostly empty and Sarah was eager to recapture the passion from that morning. She fisted Chuck's tie, pulling him closer, deeper, into the kiss and eliciting a small moan from him that made her stomach flutter. The moment didn't last long. They were interrupted by another knock and Sarah practically growled against Chuck's lips. He pulled away and blinked at her, looking simultaneously terrified and aroused by the noise she made. The door opened and Morgan appeared, taking a few steps into the room before he realized what he'd walked in on.

"Hey, Chuck. Courtney just told that you were bac-Oh! Oh, god, I'm so sorry man. I-"Morgan paused, taking stock of exactly who it was who stood in front of him. "Sarah?..." He blinked and shook his head, like something out of a cartoon. "No way. No. Way. Sarah! What are you doing here?"

"Hey, Morgan."

"It's kind of a long story buddy," Chuck said, rising from the desk with a grin. He glanced at Sarah, who still appeared a little irritated by the interruption. Still, she greeted Morgan pleasantly enough when he reached out to shake her hand.

"No doubt," he said, rubbing a hand over his beard a few times. "And I wanna hear all about it, I really do. But first, Chuck, if you wouldn't mind helping me deal with Jeff and Lester..." Morgan trailed off, jerking his thumb at the door and gesturing for Chuck to follow.

"Right, Jeffster. Alright, buddy, tell me what's been going on."

Sarah watched the two men leave the office, Morgan already chattering away, waving his arms around in the air as he explained his frustrations. She wasn't quite sure what they expected her to do while they dealt with the two former Buy More employees until Morgan suddenly paused in the doorway and looked back at her. "You coming, Sarah?"

Chuck looked back as well, seemingly surprised that she hadn't followed behind him, and Sarah suddenly realized that the two of them had intended to include her all along. Pushing away from the desk, Sarah crossed the room quickly, taking Chuck's hand as they stepped out of the office. He beamed at her while Morgan began babbling again, and Sarah was elated to have fallen back into place with Chuck's best friend so easily.

The trio passed Courtney's desk as they headed down the hallway to Jeff and Lester's office. Courtney glanced up out of the corner of her eye as they walked by. Chuck and Morgan were too absorbed in their conversation to notice Courtney watching them, but Sarah shot a look over her shoulder at the receptionist; tossing her hair and tugging on Chuck's hand to pull him closer. He stumbled slightly, looking back at Sarah and then followed her gaze to Courtney, who had returned her attention to her laptop and was typing furiously, a red blush tinging her cheeks. Chuck caught Sarah's smile when she turned to look back at him. She tried feign an innocent, but he shook his head with a small chuckle, squeezing her hand to let her know she had nothing to worry about. Even so, Sarah didn't think it would hurt to make sure Courtney knew, without any doubt, that Chuck was hers.

 **December 23rd, 2009, Burbank CA, 0500 Hours:**

It was early, the sun barely more than a pink glow on the horizon, but Sarah couldn't sleep. Not that her restlessness was an issue, by any means. The peaceful silence of their room allowed her thoughts to wander without interruption, and it was so calming to watch Chuck sleep, his eyelids fluttering lightly as he dreamed.

 _Their room._ Sarah smiled at the thought. Growing up with her father who moved around constantly and then working for the CIA hadn't lent itself to having a real home. Or anything she could truly claim as her own. But already, two days into her official relationship with Chuck, she felt safe here. Safe enough to claim this room as hers and not just as Chuck's. Part of Sarah wanted to wake him and talk with him about everything going through her mind, but he hadn't gotten much sleep in the past few days between coming back from New York, tying up loose ends at work and spending the nights with her.

Sarah shifted against his body, resting her cheek on his shoulder so that she could study his face in the early morning light. His body was warm, something she'd discovered the first time they'd slept in the same bed. Sarah had always been the opposite, a little colder than was normal, especially her feet. But she couldn't forget the first time that she'd tucked them against Chuck's and the warmth he exuded lulled her to sleep almost instantly. As she lay beside him, her fingers exploring the defined lines of his chest, she began to wonder if she should be concerned about how quickly their relationship was moving.

Granted, they'd known each other far longer than a few days, but a few days was exactly how long they had actually been in a official relationship, and already she was living in his apartment. Then again, Sarah wasn't normal, she never had been, and Chuck was well aware of that. If she didn't live here, she didn't have anywhere else to go. Chuck had offered to help her pay for another apartment suite in Maison23, just in case she decided she needed personal space. But Sarah had declined immediately. In spite of how touched she was that Chuck's foremost concern was her comfort, moving away from him would defeat the purpose of why she'd come back. As long as she was here, and as long as Chuck wanted her, she would stay close, telling him that if she ever needed space she'd use the guest bedroom. Then Sarah had shown him just how close she wanted to be by taking his hand and guiding him back to the bedroom; he'd followed her happily, wearing the lopsided grin she loved so much. Maybe their relationship and the speed of it wasn't entirely conventional. But Sarah couldn't imagine it working any other way. Strangely enough, it fit the hectic and rampant pace of the spy life she used to lead. But this was different too. Because Chuck did something every day to remind her how much he cared about her, and how confident he was that they were going to last.

She wiggled against his side, tilting her chin so that she could peek out the bedroom window. The dozens of string lights that decorated the courtyard still twinkled red, green and white and suddenly it struck Sarah that Christmas was in less than two days. A bolt of icy panic shot through her when she realized that she had no idea what she was supposed to do for Chuck when the holiday rolled around. She hadn't celebrated Christmas often as a child. Christmas with her mother felt hollow and forced without her father around, but when she was with Jack Burton, the holiday consisted of his yearly Salvation Army con job. Sarah knew that Christmas was much more than that, but the day had never held any real meaning for her. Getting Chuck a gift would be her number one priority in the coming days. But what could she possibly get him? Should she get him something nerdy and completely catered to his tastes? Or what about something for work? Should it be something romantic, since she was his girlfriend now? What would a romantic gift look like?

Sarah's mind was whirling, panic and indecision making it impossible to sleep. Glancing at the alarm clock on the bedside table, Sarah dropped back down onto her pillow with a huff. It was barely five am, the only person who could help her right now would still be asleep.

 _Ellie._

Sarah sighed. She'd avoided being alone with Chuck's sister since the four of them shared dinner together two nights ago. But she knew that Ellie wanted answers, answers that Sarah couldn't give her in front of Chuck and Devon. Maybe Ellie's interrogation wouldn't be quite so harsh if it took place while shopping for Christmas gifts. That was Sarah's hope at least. Find a gift and assuage Ellie; killing two birds with one stone. For now, she could get a head start on brainstorming. Maybe an early morning run would get the ideas flowing; it would relieve the sense of panic that still threatened to devour her. As slowly as she could, so as not to wake Chuck, Sarah sat up and shuffled towards the edge of the bed, letting the sheet slide away from her naked form.

Chuck stirred the instant she slipped away from him. He reached out for her, half conscious, dragging his fingers across her hip. "S'matter?" he mumbled, brown eyes bleary and unfocused.

Sarah turned and leaned down to place a soft kiss on his cheek, her hair falling over her shoulders and tickling his face. He wrinkled his nose and smiled sleepily, puckering his lips and kissing the air after she pulled away. Sarah stifled a giggle and ran a hand through his ruffled curls.

"Nothing's the matter," she whispered. "Go back to sleep."

"No, I can get up if you're up..." Chuck murmured, his voice muffled by the pillow. "S'ok babe, I don't mind." Sarah froze, not sure that she'd heard him correctly. Pet names had never been a part of her vocabulary. She'd known too many men who used them flippantly, without meaning. They were cheesy, petty, awkward. At least that's how she'd always felt before. When Bryce used ' _babe_ ' on their mission, she'd visibly cringed. It was so obviously fake then, all for the cover. Probably a little vindictive too. It wouldn't surprise Sarah if Bryce had done it only to make Chuck jealous. But when the word came from Chuck's mouth, even a Chuck who was still half asleep and not totally aware of his surroundings, it didn't feel the same. For him, it really was a term of endearment. Something that carried his emotions and his affection for her. In spite of how strange it was to hear the word again, Sarah's body tingled when he said it.

Chuck's hand fell away from her waist and his eyes slipped shut before she even had a chance to reply. She watched him for a minute longer, admiring his smooth skin, the muscles in his arms, and the gentle features in his handsome face. Tearing herself away, Sarah picked through her still packed suitcase for her running gear, wondering if she should start unpacking when she came back. She didn't need the suitcase anymore if she didn't plan on going anywhere after all.

 **o-o-o-o**

"Thank you for agreeing to help me with Christmas shopping, Ellie," Sarah said as the two women strolled through the outdoor strip mall. "I've never been great at picking out gifts." _Never really had a reason to._

Ellie waved her hand, the one that wasn't occupied with three large shopping bags. "Oh come on, Sarah. You don't have to thank me, I'm glad you asked! Actually, I've been meaning to spend some one-on-one time with you ever since you got back to Burbank."

And there it was. Not that Sarah hadn't been expecting it. She knew Ellie was going to corner her sooner or later, and Sarah couldn't blame her. The woman had practically raised Chuck, it was only natural for her to be protective of him. But if Sarah and Ellie were ever going to be on good terms, Sarah knew that she needed to be as honest with Ellie as she had been with Chuck in New York. And that meant finding a way to explain the unfamiliar and sometimes overwhelming feelings she had for him. Not an easy task, considering she had trouble understanding them herself.

"Why don't we take a break and talk for a bit then," Sarah suggested, pointing to a nearby cafe with outdoor tables. Ellie gladly accepted. Not only had they been carrying around heavy bags for the better part of the morning, but being five months pregnant, Sarah couldn't imagine Ellie enjoyed being on her feet for two long. Luckily, they didn't have to lug around the brand new surfboard Sarah had picked out. The store had generously offered to deliver it to Echo Park by tomorrow evening.

Once the two had settled at a small table underneath an umbrella and a server brought them out iced teas, Ellie leaned back in her chair, one hand rested on her belly, and peered at Sarah. "So," she began with a tone that was a little too chipper to be believable. "How are you enjoying being back in Burbank?"

"It's a nice change of pace," Sarah admitted. "Although it does feel a little strange not having a mission to pack up for."

"Did they move you around often?" Ellie asked, her brows furrowing.

"They did." Sarah remembered the same look on Chuck's face the day they'd first met and she'd told him that she didn't have a home. "It didn't bother me back then. I don't have a family to visit. Working kept me busy. I didn't have to think about what I was missing." Sarah shrugged a single shoulder and stared down at her tea as she spoke, using her straw to stir the ice cubes around the glass. It had been hard enough admitting these things to Chuck, but Ellie was the classic homebody. Clean home, successful job, a wonderful husband, baby on the way. How much would she judge Sarah for leading a completely different life? To her surprise, Ellie's response was more heartfelt than she'd expected.

"And Chuck was the one who changed that for you?" Sarah looked up from her glass, catching the tenderness in Ellie's hazel eyes.

"Yeah. He was."

"That's why you came back?" Sarah just nodded and Ellie began nibbling on her lip. "It must have been tough for you."

"What do you mean?" A lot of things had been tough for Sarah when it came to Chuck Bartowski. She wasn't sure what Ellie meant.

"I mean, leaving the CIA, just like that," Ellie said with a wave of her hand. "You mentioned the other night that you've been an agent since you were a teenager, right?" Again Sarah nodded. "To leave all that for Chuck is...huge. But, after you and Bryce arrested Roark, you went back...What's different this time?"

Sarah sighed, taking a moment to gather her thoughts before responding. "You're right, Ellie. The CIA has been my entire life for over a decade. In spite of what Chuck-and you and Devon-did to change the way I looked at things, leaving everything I've ever known behind was just too difficult for me. It was too big. Besides, I wasn't sure Chuck would be able to forgive me for all the lies I told him while I was here."

Ellie chuckled. "You didn't think Chuck would forgive you? My brother might be the most forgiving person on the planet. Sometimes that comes back to bite him, but I think it's a strength more than anything else."

"I know that now," Sarah agreed. "But at the time, I wasn't so sure. Working as an agent doesn't lend itself to meeting people as open and honest as Chuck. As for what changed my mind," Sarah paused, unsure of how much she should reveal to Ellie about her near death during her last mission, "My team and I were sent on a mission that didn't go according to plan. I was injured. It took that close call for me to realize how much I regretted not being honest with Chuck."

Ellie paled. In spite of Sarah's vague description of the events of the mission, it was clear that she'd interpreted what happened. "So you wanted to find him and apologize?

"Yeah."

Ellie went quiet for a moment, her lips tightening as she thought. Finally, she looked up at Sarah, her brows pulled together in a determined expression."Can I ask you something then?"

"Of course."

"Do you love him?" Sarah felt like she'd been hit by a sledgehammer. Chuck hadn't even said those words to her, how was she supposed to explain to Ellie that even thinking about the significance of the words made her panic. Sensing her hesitation, Ellie continued. "It's just...After you left, Chuck was crushed. I know my brother and I've seen him go through his fair share of relationships, but the way he looked at you, Sarah...He fell hard. He may not have said it then, but he was in love. You changed his life the day you two met in Malibu in a way none of us ever could have."

Sarah was at a loss for words. But Ellie didn't seem to need her input, she plowed onward, her hazel eyes boring into Sarah. "After all that, the last thing I want, is for Chuck to give his heart to you, only to watch you walk away again when things get too tough."

Sarah's anxiety vanished when Ellie fell silent. True, she'd expressed the same fears to Chuck in private and battled with herself often about whether she deserved to be back in his life, but for some reason, hearing the words come out of Ellie's mouth, as an accusation, irritated her.

"Look, Ellie," she began, careful to rein in the annoyance she felt and keep her tone civil. "As much as I appreciate how much you care about your brother. What happens between us, good or bad, is ours to deal with. I think...Chuck would tell you the same thing."

Ellie's eyes widened, but she remained silent, pondering Sarah's words. "But," Sarah continued. "For what it's worth, Chuck has made it clear that he wants me to stay in Burbank. I left my life for him, Ellie. Even if I wanted to return to it, I have nowhere to go." Sarah paused and bit her lip. "Okay, that sounded less than reassuring. I don't want to leave. I'm not going anywhere. I want to stay, so you don't have to worry about Chuck." _Worry about me_ , a small part of Sarah shouted. _I'm the one getting swept off my feet every day. If he were the one to leave me..._ "To be honest with you," she continued aloud. "I think Chuck would be fine if...things were to end between us, he's changed a lot since I first met him. I'm...not sure that I could say the same for myself."

Sarah felt her cheeks beginning to burn as she confessed her fears to Ellie. But she had the right to know, especially in light of her concern for her brother's happiness. To Sarah's surprise, when Ellie spoke again, she didn't acknowledge Sarah's confession.

"Has he told you about, Hannah?" she asked suddenly and Sarah just blinked, disconcerted by the sudden change in subject.

"Uh, yes, he has." A small grin broke out on Ellie's face. "Why?"

"I watched Chuck and Hannah get together a few months after you left, and although it wasn't my business to say, I knew it wasn't right from the first time I met her." Sarah stared at the woman across from her, unsure of where this conversation was heading. "Hannah was nice enough, and she was simple. I think that simplicity was exactly what Chuck needed after everything that happened with Roark. But I'll be honest with you, Sarah. My brother needs someone that balances him. Someone that challenges him every day to be the best he can be. Someone who deserves his charm, his heart, his brains. Hannah wasn't that, not by a long shot.

"And I'll tell you what, neither was Jill. But you are, Sarah. You have been since the day you met him, and every day since. Even during the times you were gone, he was pushing harder than I've ever seen him, like he had something to prove to the world. Or maybe to you. I think, even during the times you two were at odds, he was falling even harder for you, because you made him work for what he wanted," Ellie paused to gauge Sarah's bewildered expression. "I'm so happy to hear you say that you want to stay here and fight for him. Because you're right, what happens between the two of you is your business. But I think that the two of you complement each other perfectly. And to be honest, Sarah, seeing you walk away again, would hurt me just as much as it would hurt Chuck."

"It would hurt you?"

"Of course," Ellie replied. "It hurt the last time you left. You're pretty amazing, Sarah, and I hadn't met anyone like you before. Not in Burbank anyway. It's tough at the hospital where all the nurses are older than me and the doctors are mostly men. I haven't had a lot of opportunities to make close friends. But I felt differently about you. Right from the start." Ellie finished with a tender smile and Sarah couldn't help but reciprocate.

Out of all the things Ellie had just said, the last words shocked her the most. Sarah would never have guessed that a successful woman like Ellie, with a loving family, could be as lonely as she was. Looking for a friend that she could really trust. In a backward sort of way, Ellie was admitting to the fact that she viewed Sarah as a friend, a close one. Friends weren't something Sarah was familiar with. Partners, sure. Teams. But even the girls on the CAT Squad had been people she didn't fully trust. But Ellie was a different story.

"I had no idea...Ellie, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, Sarah. Really, it is. You're here now and we have a chance to start over. If you want to that is."

Sarah had to chuckle at how much Ellie's words reminded her of Chuck's. "Of course, Ellie. I'd be honored to have you as my friend."

Ellie beamed, her smile fighting to outdo the sun . Having a friend other than Chuck in Burbank was the next step in defining Sarah's normal life. And she could think of no better person than Ellie Woodcomb.

Suddenly, she stood up, coming around the table and offering Sarah a huge hug, a little bit difficult considering Ellie's belly, but Sarah gripped her back as tightly as she could.

"Good," Ellie said, drawing away and holding Sarah at arm's length. "Now that we've got that heart-to-heart settled, what do you say we finish shopping before the crowds get worse?"

"After you." Sarah helped Ellie gather their bags, dropped some money on the table for their drinks and followed her friend back into the crowd of Christmas shoppers, feeling buoyant and content in spite of the frenzied atmosphere of the shopping center.

 **December 24th, 2009: Christmas Eve: 2000 Hours:**

They'd decided to exchange their gifts on Christmas Eve. Sarah was already nervous about Chuck's reaction, she didn't want to have to deal with his family's at the same time. Chuck agreed without any argument and had torn open the wrapping on her gifts like a kid on...well, a kid on Christmas. With Ellie's help, Sarah had picked out a new surfboard-for their inevitable trips to Malibu-a vintage record player to replace his old one, and the picture of the two of them on the beach that Ellie had given her a long time ago. It was framed now, pristine and protected, and Chuck's eyes lit up when he saw it. After he set it aside, he swept her up into a kiss that was all smiles and teeth, and Sarah hadn't minded in the least.

"Man," Chuck said finally, glancing at the many thoughtful gifts Sarah had given him. "I'm not sure how my present is going to stack up against all this."

"Whatever it is, I'm sure it'll be perfect," Sarah assured him, although she was more than a little proud that she'd managed to blow him away with the gifts she'd chosen. Reaching into his pocket, Chuck pulled out a velvet pouch and pulled on the golden strings that held it shut. Sarah kept her eyes trained on the bag, curiosity making it impossible to tear her gaze away. Setting the bag aside, Chuck pulled out a small, silver chain and held it up so that it glinted in the candle light. A charm bracelet, Sarah realized.

"Wow, it's beautiful," she murmured, watching the tiny charms jingle as Chuck reached for her hand.

"It's good luck," he said, taking her wrist and wrapping the bracelet around her with gentle fingers. "It was my mom's. My dad gave it to her after Ellie was born." The magnitude of Chuck's gift suddenly struck Sarah. This wasn't just jewelry, it wasn't just a kind gesture, it was a family heirloom. Something that held significant meaning for him in regards to his parents, two people he'd hardly known. Two people who had been deeply in love. And for him to give something this important to her? Sarah's gifts seemed trivial in light of what he'd given her. Not just a charm bracelet, but another promise.

"Chuck, I can't take this," she found herself saying, even as she clutched the bracelet close, holding it against her chest.

"Actually, you're the only one who can," he said, keeping his gentle eyes on hers. "I've been saving it for you for...a long time. Valentine's Day. Last year. When you were here with Bryce." The shock Sarah felt must have shown on her face because Chuck ducked his head and chuckled. "Yeah. If I haven't made it clear to you yet...I fell for you a long time ago, Sarah. And after you left, I tried so hard to convince myself that I hadn't. But even when I was with Hannah, it never felt right to give her that bracelet. It's always been yours."

Sarah didn't know what to say, there were no words to explain to Chuck what the gesture meant to her. Chuck continued without her intervention.

"Look, Sarah, there's something I've been wanting to tell you. And before I do, I want you to know that I don't expect you to say anything in return, it's not going to change how I feel." Reaching out, Chuck took the hand that now bore the charm bracelet and held it between both of his. "You being here with me is so incredible, and I couldn't be happier. I know that this has been fast and kind of crazy and hard. I can't tell you how much it means to me that you're jumping headfirst into this, even when you have every right to be terrified."

Chuck ran his thumbs over her hand and then scooted closer on the couch, their knees now brushing. He looked at her again and breathed out a nervous chuckle. "Sarah, you're the greatest thing that's ever happened to me. You're smart, you're beautiful, you laugh at all of my stupid jokes. And most importantly, you were there for me when I was at my lowest. You helped me believe that I was capable of anything. So...here goes. I want you to have this bracelet because I know now...known for awhile really...without any doubt, that I ..." Chuck paused to make sure she was looking at him, his expression serious. "I love you, Sarah. I am in love with you. Not the spy. You. The woman I met on the beach that believed in me when I couldn't believe in myself."

Sarah had known the words were coming, but even still, she wasn't prepared for the effect they had on her. She felt like someone had just unleashed the sun inside her body, the warmth and happiness were pouring out of her without restraint. She didn't have the words to respond, saying 'I love you too' felt like too much, but Chuck had told her he didn't expect anything of her. So instead, she beamed at him, her heart threatening to pound its way out of her chest.

"Thank you." Her voice cracked but Chuck, true to his word, grinned at her and leaned forward, wrapping his long arms around her until she was cradled in his embrace. Sarah gripped the back of his shirt, digging her fingers into the fabric so tightly she was afraid she might hurt him, but he didn't move and she didn't let go. She held him for a long time. Trying to convey that the she felt the same way but that the words wouldn't come. Not yet anyway. Someday. Chuck's patience would get her there. So she thanked him again, the words a whisper in his ear, and Chuck's body shook with gentle laughter.

"Anytime," he chuckled, pressing his lips to her temple. Then he drew away and held her at arm's length, a playful smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Seriously, anytime. I'll say it again now if you want."

Sarah knew he was teasing but if she was honest with herself, she did want to hear it again. And again and again. She wanted to hear him say it in the throes of passion, or in a fit of laughter, or before they went to bed, when they were watching T.V., surfing on the beach. No one, before Chuck, had told her that they loved her and meant it the way he did. That he loved her for her flaws as well as her strengths, that his passion was unconditional, that he cared about her happiness more than his own. As far as she was concerned, Chuck could tell her he loved her as often as he wanted too. And someday, when she built up enough courage to put her powerful feelings for him into words, she'd say it back. Until then, she'd just have to show him.

 **December 25th, 2009: Woodcomb Christmas Party:**

Sarah hadn't been sure what to expect when Chuck told her they were attending a Bartowski Christmas Party. A party usually suggested tons of guest, drinks, chatting, games. Fun for most people, but Sarah enjoyed her solitude and being surrounded by a room full of strangers wasn't the most appealing way Sarah could think of spending Christmas. Faking conversation and pretending to care about getting to know a bunch of people she'd probably never see again didn't strike her as a particularly good time.

She was pleasantly surprised to discover that a Bartowski Christmas Party was just the opposite of what she'd imagined. She and Chuck crossed the courtyard around noon on Christmas Day, Chuck carrying the crumbling fruitcake they'd made together-or rather Sarah had attempted to make it, and Chuck kept stealing handfuls of the ingredients until she'd chased him around the living room with a wooden spoon and tackled him onto the couch, where they'd distracted themselves until the smell of burning fruitcake tore them apart. When Sarah had slumped, disappointed in herself for ruining her only contribution to the party, Chuck gathered her up in a comforting embrace, assuring her that a ruined fruitcake made the party that much more special, because it was the thought that counted. Sarah was quick to disagree, but then Chuck has suggested they finished what they started on the living room couch, and her disappointment was quickly forgotten.

When they knocked on the Woodcombs' apartment door, Sarah found she'd been wrong about the number of strangers she'd have to interact with. Devon answered the door, took the cake from Chuck's arms, and beckoned them inside. The apartment was filled with twinkling string lights, and lit by the afternoon sun and glow from the fireplace. It was warm, cozy and filled with the amazing aroma of Ellie's cooking. Morgan and Anna rose from their place on the couch and greeted Chuck and Sarah, while Ellie came out of the kitchen and told Devon to start setting the table. Sarah was overjoyed to realize that the entire guest list was already here. Her companions from the beach six months ago were also the ones she would be sharing her first real Christmas with.

The food Ellie had prepared was amazing, turkey, sweet potatoes, stuffing, pies, cakes-even Sarah's burnt fruitcake was devoured, though mostly by Morgan, who would eat anything and everything if it was remotely edible. After their Christmas meal, the group gathered around the fireplace and exchanged gifts. Chuck had picked out the gifts for everyone, explaining that he and Sarah were giving out gifts as a couple this year, although his real reason had been to save Sarah from stressing over what to get people she didn't know well yet. For that, she was extremely grateful.

Devon had gotten everyone the same gift; memberships to his favorite gym. Sarah could bet that only one or two of those memberships would actually be used, but the gesture was appreciated by everyone anyway. Morgan and Anna explained that the new apartment had left them without a lot of spare cash, but that they had still managed to grab everyone a nick knack or two when they attended San Diego Comic-Con in the summer. Morgan handed Sarah a small female figurine dressed in a skin-tight red, white and blue suit.

"It reminded me of you when I saw it," Morgan explained. "She's the most badass female superhero to ever exist. Ms. Marvel."

"Thanks, Morgan." Sarah smiled, unsure what she would do with the figurine, maybe Chuck could put it up in his office. Still, it meant a lot that Morgan had thought of her when he saw it.

"You are so welcome. Treat her with care." Sarah almost laughed, but Morgan's face was so serious that she swallowed her chuckle and nodded instead.

Next was Ellie, who handed Sarah a small brown box. Inside was a thin silver chain with a beautiful blue pendant. Sarah had no idea when Ellie had gotten the necklace for her, since they hadn't separated for more than five minutes the day they went shopping together. Maybe Ellie had a few spy skills of her own. Sarah was moved by the thoughtful, and no doubt expensive, gift so she pulled Ellie into a tight hug, promising herself that she'd become a friend worthy of someone as giving as Ellie Woodcomb.

After the gift exchange, Chuck made everyone hot chocolate and Ellie picked out a Hallmark channel holiday movie for them to watch. The movie was a little too goofy for Sarah's tastes, but she was hardly paying attention to it as the afternoon wore on. She curled up on the couch, burrowing into Chuck's side when he wrapped a large fuzzy blanket around both of them and snaked an arm around her waist to pull her even closer. Sipping her hot chocolate, Sarah allowed herself to be enveloped by the warmth of the room, Chuck's body, and the unconditional acceptance she'd been shown today by everyone she'd betrayed six months ago. As she sat next to Chuck, she reflected back on the last couple of days. Thankful didn't even begin to describe how she felt about the way things were unfolding. This had been the first Christmas that meant something to her. And if Sarah had anything to say about it, it certainly wasn't going to be the last.

* * *

 _Thank you for the support and kind words. See you next chapter!_


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** _Welcome back! Gotta thank everyone for the amazing reviews, the amount of support for every chapter still blows me away, so thank you! For this chapter, we have a little moment planned for reader interaction. My beta **michaelfmx ** and I, found a song that we felt fit the Sarah we had created in this story to a tee. And we used the song in this chapter in a very special way. That being said, I would encourage you all to listen to the song called 'Arms' by Christina Perri before or during the scene it is used. Just a little cheesy bit of fun. Alright moving on!_

 _RobM, Hurricane Ellie was all for you buddy. :)_

 _I hope you all enjoy this chapter and thanks once again for the amazing support._

* * *

 **December 31st, 2009: Echo Park, 0700 Hours:**

Sarah had managed to suppress her disturbing memories of the night she was shot during her last mission in Moscow for a few months. But this particular morning, she hadn't been so lucky. Attributing it to the fact that she no longer had to suppress the memories in order to focus on another mission, Sarah was currently reliving the memory through her dreams. But this time, she wasn't on the receiving end of the bullet. Carina and Cole flickered in and out of her peripheral vision, shouting things she couldn't understand as bullets flew around them. Sarah was frozen in place, unable to move as she watched Chuck take her place on the mission. He was hiding behind a small dumpster on the far side of the alley, aiming his gun and shooting randomly at Volkoff's men, who had him surrounded. Sarah saw the bullet heading towards him with startling clarity, picking it out of the rain of other bullets as if it were a fireball and not a small piece of metal. She tried to scream for him to move but her voice wouldn't come. She was helpless, forced to watch as the bullet pierced his side and knocked him to the ground. Carina was beside him in an instant, shouting for him to stay awake, her hands pressed against his wound. Sarah watched, feeling hot tears sting her eyes and her breath beginning to come in gasps. She still couldn't move, couldn't speak, and her body tingled and buzzed and then, all of the sudden, her eyes shot open and she lurched upright in bed. It took a moment for Sarah to realize that she was in Burbank, not a cold alleyway in Moscow bleeding to death. As the panic coursing through her body began to ebb, she looked over at Chuck who lay beside her, breathing steadily, his body wrapped tightly in their shared blanket.

Sarah closed her eyes and took a deep breath to steady herself. She was still trembling, still fighting the bile from rising in her throat as she remembered what it had felt like to see Chuck lying in the alleyway in a pool of his own blood. As much as she wanted to ignore the dream and let Chuck rest, it had shaken her to her very core. She needed to see him awake, hear his voice, have him reassure her that he was okay.

 _Since when have I ever been so needy?_ Sarah asked herself. She pushed the question aside for now. It was natural to experience some PTSD after missions, but having Chuck take her place in the nightmare had been rattling, to say the least. And she hadn't expected to continue having 'spy-related' dreams after returning to Burbank.

"Chuck," she whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder and leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Are you awake?"

"Mmm," he mumbled, clearly not fully conscious. "Sure...I'm ...awake."

He started snoring lightly again and Sarah blinked away relieved tears. She curled up behind him, pressing herself as close to his body as she could and resting her cheek against his shoulder. Chuck must have felt the shuddering breath she released because he suddenly shifted and looked over his shoulder at her.

"Sarah?" He caught the glassy shine in her eyes and turned over completely, now wide awake. "Hey, what's the matter?"

"I had a nightmare," she said simply, adjusting her cheek against his shoulder and slinging one arm over his narrow waist. "I just needed to know that you were okay."

"Oh, Sarah." Chuck wrapped his arms around her and pulled her onto his chest, his lips brushing against her hair. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head, content with listening to his heart beat and reveling in the warmth of his body. Chuck seemed to understand so he continued holding her in silence, his hand running up and down her back soothingly as he murmured words of comfort . When they finally fell back asleep, Sarah's nightmare didn't return, in fact, she didn't dream at all. She fell asleep in Chuck's arms and she woke up a few hours later in the same position, fully convinced that her boyfriend was very much alive. And even still, the anxiety generated by her nightmare didn't quite fade. As they both rose for the day, Sarah found her spy senses had returned in full force and were more acute than usual. She was on edge during her shower and even more so during breakfast when the sound of the toaster made her reach for a kitchen knife. Even so, she continued telling Chuck over and over again that she felt fine. He didn't look convinced.

When Ellie called around ten a.m., her voice fraught with panic, Sarah's unease came roaring back in full force.

"Sarah?" Ellie opted to skip her usual pleasantries, her voice shaking with what Sarah thought might be tears. "Oh thank god."

"Ellie? What's wrong?" A million scenarios went through Sarah's head at once, all of them ending in Ellie being hurt or captured. She crossed the living room and peered out the window, searching for any sign of movement in Ellie's apartment across the courtyard.

"Sarah, I need your help! It's an emergency."

"Talk to me, Ellie," Sarah demanded, her heart threatening to pound its way out of her chest. In her head, she began running through a list of objects she could grab from the kitchen or living room to use as a weapon. "What's the matter? What do you need?"

"Champagne!"

"...What?" Sarah wasn't sure she'd heard Ellie correctly. Champagne?

"I forgot the champagne! Sarah, you can't have a New Year's Party without champagne! But I have to set up the decorations with Devon and cook dinner, and Morgan and Anna are both busy today, they can't help me. Sarah. I need you and Chuck to run to the store for me. Please, please, please! I'll pay you back, I promise."

Sarah was speechless. She'd been so on edge this morning that she'd expected Ellie's panic to be the result of something nefarious. But she just needed them to go to the store? Sarah felt ridiculous. Why had she immediately assumed Ellie's panic was in regards to something dangerous? How was she ever supposed to shake her spy sense and assume normalcy first? _Could_ she ever do that?

"Yeah, of course, Ellie. We'll pick up everything you need. Why don't you text me a list."

"Thank you!" After a few more consecutive 'thank you's' and a rapid goodbye, Sarah hung up the phone and looked back at Chuck, who was trying to hide a smile and failing miserably.

"Hurricane Ellie's in town," he teased. "It happens every time she hosts a major party. In fact, I'm surprised you didn't see her during Christmas. She must have been really trying to make you feel at home."

Sarah shook her head and glanced down at the list Ellie had just sent to her phone. "Looks like we're going to need to make a grocery run."

"I'll warm up the car," Chuck offered, grabbing his keys and kissing Sarah's temple as he passed. As soon as he'd left, Sarah sighed and rubbed her forehead. Two spy-related freak-outs in the span of a few hours wasn't a good sign. It was going to be a long morning.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah kept a close eye on the black van that had been following them since the entered downtown L.A. It had mimicked their every turn, keeping a steady distance of approximately thirty yards and Sarah was growing wary. Her mind raced through the list of possibilities of who might be following them. She'd cut her ties with the CIA and her cover as an agent. She shouldn't have been traceable. Chuck on the other hand...Maybe someone was after Carmichael Electronics' burgeoning assets.

Chuck was oblivious to the possible danger, singing along to the radio and pointing out places he wanted them to visit together as they passed. Sarah nodded and smiled, but her attention was still on the car behind them. If it was someone dangerous, then it was her job to protect Chuck and that meant reverting back into agent mode.

The black van followed them into the parking lot of the grocery store, parking a few spaces away from them. Sarah stepped out of the car and hurried around to Chuck's side, grabbing his arm and half-dragging, half-leading him into the store, away from the hulking man that had just stepped out of the car.

"Don't think I've ever seen anyone this excited to get groceries," Chuck teased, stumbling when she tugged on his arm a little too hard.

"On the contrary," she shot back. "I would much rather be back at our apartment. So the sooner we finish here, the sooner we get home."

"Alright," he chuckled, still looking a little confused. Sarah patted his arm and glanced over her shoulder at the large man who was still following them. She couldn't get a good look at his face due to the sunglasses he wore, but the grimace twisting his lips was enough to make her even more wary.

Chuck led Sarah to the liquor aisle and the large stranger followed, perusing bottles of champagne with his sunglasses still covering his eyes.

"Which one do you think Ellie will want?"

"I'm not sure," Sarah tried to keep her tone even, her entire body tensing when the man took a few steps closer to them.

"We should narrow it down. Moet & Chandon or Dom Perignon?"

"Um...the second one."

"Ellie likes Moet & Chandon, I think."

"Okay then that one." Sarah was getting agitated now, she wanted to leave this aisle, and it was clear in her voice. Chuck flinched and looked over at her.

"You okay?"

"Yes. Yeah, I'm sorry," Sarah said, relaxing when the man grabbed a bottle and disappeared around the corner of the aisle. "I'm just as unsure as you are though. Should we call Ellie?"

Chuck narrowed his eyes at her and then resumed his examination of the bottles. "Nah, that's alright. I'll just pick one." Sarah nodded and kept her eyes on the aisle as Chuck picked the Moet & Chandon.

"Alright, we need some hor d'oeuvres now. Follow me." Chuck led the way to the next aisle, stopping so suddenly that Sarah nearly crashed into him. "Excuse me," he said and Sarah peeked around him, coming face-to-face with the towering stranger that had followed them. Immediately, her hands bunched into fists, every muscle in her body coiling like a tight spring ready to snap. She was about to force her way in front of Chuck, fully prepared to fight this man in the middle of a public grocery store if he was a threat. But the man's ugly grimace disappeared, replaced by a beaming smile, and he lifted a large hand to pat Chuck on the shoulder.

"No problem, man. Tiny aisles." The man nodded to Sarah and stepped around them, heading to the checkout counter and tossing a 'Have a nice day' over his shoulder. Sarah sagged against the shelves and closed her eyes.

"Hey, what's the matter? Sarah?" Chuck's hands were on her shoulders and she leaned forward, resting her forehead against the middle of his chest as he wrapped his arms around her comfortingly. "What's wrong?"

"I'm losing my mind..." she murmured.

"What?" Chuck drew away and held her at arm's length. "What do you mean?"

"I can't seem to get myself out of spy mode," she said in a near whisper. "I had the nightmare about you this morning, and then Ellie called and I could have sworn she was being held hostage from the way she sounded. And just now, that man, I've been watching him follow us since we got downtown. I thought he was tailing us...You, specifically. I don't know what's wrong with me."

Chuck's eyes were round, his lips a thing line. He obviously hadn't realized the magnitude of what had been going through Sarah's head all morning. "Hey, nothing's 'wrong' with you. You were a spy for a long time, Sarah. I think it's probably natural that your instincts might kick in here or there."

"But in a grocery store in Burbank?"

"Hey, you never know. That guy did look pretty intimidating," Chuck said with a grin. When Sarah didn't smile back, he switched tactics. "Sarah, nothing is wrong with you. You're adjusting to a new kind of life here. It will take time, but I think you're doing great. And remember that you have me to lean on when you're having an off day."

She finally smiled, and Chuck leaned down to kiss her gently. "Now, how about we get this shopping done and find some time to relax at home before Hurricane Ellie has us help set up the party." Sarah nodded her agreement and followed Chuck down the aisle, throwing one last look over her shoulder at the pleasant stranger who she'd come close to assaulting. Suddenly, the party didn't sound so appealing.

 **December 31st, 2009: New Year's Eve Party, Echo Park, CA:**

Sarah watched from the sidelines as the New Year's party got underway. Morgan and Anna had turned on the TV to watch the ball drop in New York, although that wouldn't happen for quite awhile. Devon was helping Ellie put away what was left of the appetizers that everyone had devoured earlier in the evening, and started setting out plates for the dinner instead. Chuck and Casey chatted nearby, although about what, Sarah wasn't sure. Carmichael Electronics, if she had to guess.

Sarah wanted to join the party, but her nerves were still raw from the events of the day. She was so frustrated with herself for falling back into her spy mindset, but more than that, she was worried she'd never be able to shake it. And if she couldn't shake it, then how could she start a new life with Chuck? It wouldn't be fair to him if he constantly had to worry about Sarah reverting to her old self. He had dealt with that enough already. She wouldn't do that to him, no matter what it took. Dinner started a few minutes later, but Sarah did little more than push her food around her plate, hoping to appear like she'd eaten something, so as not to offend Ellie. She caught Casey's eye across the table once or twice. He seemed to be watching her, his clear blue eyes cutting right through her amiable façade. After the plates were cleared, and everyone had gathered in the living room to watch the party in New York, Casey grabbed Sarah's attention and gestured for her to follow him.

Although Sarah had worked closely with John Casey ten months ago to protect Chuck from his psychotic boss, Ted Roark, she still didn't know the man. Not well, anyway. So when he pulled her aside during the New Year's party at the Woodcomb's apartment it was clear that he wanted to have a private word with her. Sarah wasn't sure what to expect but her guard was up. Out of all the people she'd been reacquainting herself with over the last week or so in Burbank, Casey hadn't made much of an appearance.

"Look, Walker," he began gruffly, once he'd drawn her away from the rest of the party and out into a quiet corner of the courtyard.

"Sarah's fine," she interrupted.

"Uh...Sarah, right. Look, I wanted to talk to you about the decision you made in New York, to come back and find Chuck." Sarah knew that she probably wasn't equipped to respond to much that Casey might have to say, but hearing that he wanted to speak with her about something as personal as her relationship with Chuck truly shocked her. Casey didn't seem like the type of person who enjoyed sharing personal thoughts, let alone talking about someone else's feelings, and besides that, he hardly even knew her.

"A long time ago," he continued without her input, "I was married to a woman named Kathleen." Sarah listened with rapt attention as Casey relayed the story of his marriage that crumbled under the pressure of service to his country. A few similarities between her experience and Casey's began to emerge as he continued, and by the time he reached the end of his story, Sarah realized why he'd pulled her aside in the first place.

"Back then, I had a choice to make about my future. And I chose wrong." Casey paused, allowing Sarah a moment to absorb all of the information he'd just given her. "If I could go back and tell Kathleen everything...About how I felt about us and our future, I would. But I made a mistake and I lost that chance. You," Casey paused and looked Sarah straight in the eye with unnerving intensity, "You didn't make the same mistake. Not when it really counted."

Sarah remained silent. She wasn't sure what Casey wanted her to say or even if he expected her to add anything.

"Sarah, I couldn't help but notice the way you've been acting tonight. I know that look, all too well. You're wondering if you can do this….If you made the right decision to try to have a 'normal' life with Chuck. I just wanted to let you know, in case you're worried or doubting the choice you made, that you did the right thing." Casey lifted his whiskey glass and swirled it a little before downing the last few sips. "I think you and Bartowski are going to be very happy together. Don't give up."

Sarah had never been one to cross personal boundaries with strangers, but at that moment, she wanted nothing more than to throw her arms around Casey and give him the biggest hug she could manage. Instead, she reined in her emotions and offered him a grateful smile.

"Thank you, Casey. That means...more than you know." Casey grunted, his own smile a little nervous. But Sarah was telling the truth. The fears and self-doubts that had plagued her since returning to Burbank lessened with each passing day, but they were still there. And hearing such a personal story from Casey made a significant difference in her confidence.

"You're welcome. And...It's John, by the way."

"John," Sarah corrected, her smile widening. Casey shuffled his feet, grunted uncomfortably, and suggested they head back to the main room. But Sarah knew she wouldn't be satisfied if she didn't let him know just how deeply his story had touched her. So before they parted ways in the living room, Sarah placed a hand on Casey's arm and squeezed, murmuring another 'thank you' that he acknowledged with a short nod before lumbering off towards the beer cooler. Sarah stayed by the entrance to the hallway, watching the party unfold before her. Morgan and Anna were chanting the countdown to midnight...an entire minute too early, but no one was stopping them. Devon was handing out noisemakers and prepping handfuls of confetti to toss in the air, although Sarah imagined Ellie hadn't been too happy with whomever made that suggestion. Chuck was chatting animatedly with his sister, but he paused when Sarah returned, straightening and turning to scan the room, almost as if he'd felt her enter. A huge grin lit up his handsome face when he saw her, and it melted Sarah's heart. By the time she reached his side, the actual countdown had begun, but Chuck was more concerned about where she'd been.

 _10...9..._

"Casey wanted to talk with me. About Kathleen," she explained, resting her hands against Chuck's chest when he looped his arms around her waist.

"It's a good story. Puts a lot of things into perspective doesn't it?" Chuck asked, lowering his voice and brushing his nose against hers.

 _6...5..._

"Yeah, it does."

 _3...2...1..._

"I love you," Chuck said as the room exploded with noise and confetti. He didn't give her a chance to reply but pressed his lips against hers and smiled. Sarah's heart pounded in time with the 'pop' of the noise-makers and she melted into Chuck's arms, feeling the weight and pressure she'd put on her own shoulders beginning to lift.

"Happy New Year," she said, once he'd pulled away. It was a fresh start, a new beginning for both of them. But especially for Sarah, who considered this moment the beginning of her new life.

 **January 20th, 2010: Echo Park, CA: 2030 Hours**

Sarah plopped down onto the couch with a sigh, lifting her sock-covered feet onto the living room coffee table and waiting for Chuck to join her after he finished prepping snacks for Monday Movie Night. Since the day she'd moved in, Chuck had made it a priority to introduce her to all of his passions...his nerdy ones specifically. They had spent the last three Monday nights watching various superhero films. Tonight, they were starting on the Iron Man series. Chuck assured her that she'd love the cocky and affluent Tony Stark, but Sarah was more convinced he would remind her of agents she used to know...whose attitudes she couldn't stomach.

Sinking further into the couch, Sarah allowed the stress of the day to lift from her shoulders and sore muscles. She'd just returned from the nearby gym where she'd signed on as a part-time fitness instructor. She'd only been working there for a couple of weeks, but already the job was wearing on her. Training young women to fight every day, young women with bright eyes and determined faces, reminded her too much of her early days in the CIA. If she was going to stay in Burbank, she wanted to keep anything that reminded her of her old life as far away as possible.

But, for now, it gave her something to occupy her time while Chuck was busy with his company. Since signing with Insomniac Games, it seemed as if Chuck's workload had tripled and his days had gotten even longer. Carmichael Electronics was definitely taking off. So on her days off from the gym, Sarah joined him there, spending hours helping Casey update the security system and tormenting Courtney whenever the opportunity presented itself….actually, if she was being honest, she created most of the opportunities. Not horribly; just a feigned smile here and a passive aggressive comment there. Sarah knew she shouldn't be so cruel to the poor woman, but she couldn't help herself. Especially not when she still found Courtney occasionally skulking around Chuck's office when she thought Sarah wasn't around.

In fact, just last week, when Sarah had joined Chuck in his office during his lunch break, he'd been pulled away by one of his employees, leaving Sarah to occupy the office by herself while she waited. Minutes after he'd gone, there'd been a soft knock on the door, a salacious 'Mr. Bartowski?' and then Courtney had appeared in the doorway, a few buttons of her suit jacket undone, revealing just enough cleavage to tease. Sarah was almost impressed. Almost. The woman acted like she'd taken lessons from Roan Montgomery's Seduction School. But then, Sarah _had_ taken lessons from Roan Montgomery, and Courtney had made one very big mistake. She'd stepped on the toes of a jealous former agent. So, in the most pleasant tone she could muster, Sarah invited Courtney into the office, grinning inwardly when a flash of fear crossed the woman's face.

"Chuck just stepped out," she'd said, offering Courtney her seat while she took Chuck's chair. "But he'll be back in a minute or two. Care to wait with me until he gets back?"

Courtney had stuttered, blushed, and nervously buttoned her jacket, all while trying to find a way to excuse herself. Sarah had watched with barely contained glee, giddy when Courtney fled a minute or two later just before Chuck returned and asked what Sarah had done to send Courtney running down the hallway.

Sarah smiled at the memory. In a way, she considered it a mission to protect Chuck from a seductress like Courtney. It was almost like having an asset. She was pulled from her thoughts when Chuck plopped down onto the couch next to her and the cushions bounced under his weight. Setting a gigantic bowl of popcorn down on the table in front of them, he lifted the remote and wiggled it in the air. "You ready to start?"

"Just a sec," Sarah said lifting herself off the cushion and tackling Chuck against the couch. He fell back with a laugh, curling his arms around her while she dotted his neck and chin with kisses. When she was comfortable, snuggled between his side and the back of the couch, she grinned up at him and tapped the remote with one hand. "Ready."

Chuck laughed again, his eyes full of warmth and love and so many other things that she couldn't put words too, but made her feel like she was the most precious thing in the world. Chuck turned on the movie and they watched together in comfortable silence for the first few minutes, Sarah's feet rubbing against his every so often while they snuggled.

Suddenly, Chuck paused the movie during a fast-paced action sequence and tilted his chin to look down at where Sarah rested against his chest. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"You don't have to answer. I mean I get it might be classified information and all that, but I'm so curious!" Sarah watched him with an amused smile, waiting for a question to emerge from his rambling. "Did you ever do that?" Chuck pointed at the screen when Sarah looked confused. "Any of that? Car chases? Fistfights? Gadgets? All that spy stuff in the movies...Is it real?"

Sarah had to fight to smother her giggle. It was such a nerdy thing to ask, but she should have known Chuck wouldn't be able to contain his curiosity for long.

"You want to know if I was ever in a high-speed car chase...specifically with a convoy of Humvees traveling through the Afghani desert?" Sarah asked, raising her brows and nodding towards the paused movie.

"Oh god, that would be so cool," he murmured, watching Sarah with a glazed expression as she propped herself up on one elbow to look at him. "But any car chase works."

"Then yes."

"Really? Where? When?"

"Paris. 2007. A year before we met, I was chasing down an arms dealer and he jumped into a car. So I followed."

"Oh my god, that's so cool! Did you catch him?"

Sarah snorted. "Of course I caught him."

"How about a hand-to-hand fight? Did you ever train with a sage old man in the wilderness? Like Bruce Wayne?"

She laughed. "I wouldn't go that far. Maybe Casey has."

"Do you really think so?" Chuck's eyes sparkled with genuine excitement, and Sarah's heart bubbled over with love for the man beside her.

"Maybe." She shrugged a shoulder and drew her fingers along his cheek softly. "But I didn't. We did have a training dojo, though." A goofy smile suddenly bloomed on Chuck's face.

"What?"

"My girlfriend is such a badass." His voice sounded almost dreamy. "I'm just the luckiest guy in the world, that's all." Sarah was about to thank him for that comment with a kiss when Chuck jerked and his face lit up again.

"Oh! I have another question!" Sarah sighed. For as nerdy and adorable as her boyfriend was, he was failing miserably at reading her signals. "Do you really have those radio watches? Or what about little spy cameras like the ones in _On Her Majesty's Secret Service_?"

"Tell you what, how about you put in one of your favorite 'spy' movies and I'll tell you what's real and what's not."

"Deal!" Chuck said, nearly knocking her off the couch in his hurry to change the movie. "How do you feel about James Bond?"

"Whatever you want."

Once Chuck had changed the film and joined her back on the couch, this time with his head resting comfortably in her lap, he stroked her knee and smiled up at her. "You're the greatest. Thank you, baby." Suddenly, Chuck's smile faded and he sat up, his expression worried. "I'm sorry."

His mood had shifted so quickly, that Sarah wasn't sure what he was apologizing for. "Sorry for what?"

Chuck's cheeks turned red and he looked at the television screen nervously. "For the...name. We haven't really talked about pet names. I know that some people don't really like them, I should have asked before I said anything. I remember that Bryce used it the last time you were here-" Sarah gave him a stern look. "I know, I know. No mentioning the fake relationship. But I couldn't help but notice you kind of cringed when he used it. I wasn't sure if it was him or the name or both."

Sarah never liked it when Chuck compared himself to Bryce or brought up the fake relationship that had put such a strain on their own, but she couldn't help but be touched that he'd been so sensitive to her feelings, even back then.

Truthfully, she hadn't really even noticed him use it...probably because he said it so often when he was half-asleep. Even so, the fact that he was so concerned about her comfort level, filled her with warmth. "It's okay, Chuck. Really it is. It's not the first time you've called me that, you know."

Chuck's brown eyes rounded and his lips thinned. His expression was so comical that Sarah had to stifle a laugh, careful that she didn't make him think she was laughing at him. "I've called you that before?"

"Yes. Mostly when you're half-asleep. It's...cute. I like it." She paused. "And to be honest with you, no, I never did like pet names before you. They felt fake to me. But...the first time you used it...even though you were half asleep...it felt different. Like it carried the weight of everything you felt for me. So yes, I like it." Sarah looked away from him, feeling ridiculous even saying these words, but he cupped her chin and drew her face back to his.

"You do? Promise? You're not just saying that?"

"No, Chuck. I mean it," she said, a slight blush rising on her cheeks.

"Okay," he grinned, kissed her, and settled himself back on her lap. "Good. Because I like calling you that."

As the movie went on, Sarah stopped watching for inaccuracies and focused on the man lying in her lap, her hand trailing through his curls. As happy as she was right now, she felt the niggling unease in the back of her mind again. The anger that always came up when she realized she still couldn't put into words how much she cared about him, when every day he was more and more candid with her. She had to find a way to express herself. Maybe the issue was that she was over thinking it. She knew she loved Chuck, she felt it, but saying it out loud seemed so terrifying. What if she said it wrong? Was there a wrong way to say it? Sarah sighed and returned her attention to the movie. The words would come eventually, they had to...

 **February 10th, 2010: Echo Park, CA: 2100 Hours**

Valentine's Day was in less than a week and Sarah was panicking. Ellie had given her plenty of advice about what to get Chuck for the holiday, but it was weighing heavily on Sarah's mind that she had still yet to tell him that she loved him. And Valentine's Day was all about those three words, it was on all of the damn decorations. Sarah was frustrated, but she didn't want that frustration to be the reason she told him either. It had to be real, organic. She needed to stop over thinking it...

Devon had gone all out for Valentine's Day this year and decorated his apartment a week in advance, showering Ellie with a special gift every day in a sort of Valentine's countdown. She was now seven months pregnant, unable to fly in her third trimester, so Devon's plan to take a trip to the Pocono's hadn't panned out. But he was making up for it as far as Sarah was concerned. In fact, she was a little intimidated by how far Devon had thrown himself into dedicating the entire week to his wife's comfort and happiness. She wasn't sure what to do if Chuck expected the same from her. Not that he'd said anything, in fact, he seemed perfectly content, and he kept sending Sarah amused glances whenever Devon brought out a new present or sappy comment.

They were at the Woodcomb's apartment now, with Morgan and Anna, spending the night together playing a simplified version of the Newly Wed Game to celebrate the upcoming holiday. Much to Sarah's surprise, she and Chuck were doing quite well. She'd been worried that she wouldn't know the answers to many of the questions, as they could be quite specific. But most of them had been relatively easy and the only two they'd failed seemed inconsequential to Sarah in the larger context of a relationship: 'What was the first car your partner ever owned?' (Who cared about cars that much?) and 'What is your partner's favorite flavor of ice cream?' (Sarah didn't know what ice cream had to do with anything, but apparently Chuck had very specific tastes because she hadn't even known that the ice cream he listed existed).

Now the score was tied between her and Chuck and Ellie and Devon, as the last question came up, Sarah's competitive nature kicked in. She wasn't going to lose tonight. It didn't matter to her that Ellie and Devon had a baby on the way and had been married for a year, she was going beat them and win.

"Alright teams, last question, winner takes all!" Morgan "Guys, what do you find most physically attractive about your partner?"

Sarah glanced at Chuck and he gave her a soft smile before scribbling something down on his board. She knew what he would write, he'd told her before. But if Ellie and Devon scored a point too then the game would be tied. Morgan and Anna had long since given up the game since Morgan was more interested in being the announcer.

"Ready guys? Okay, girls give your answers."

Sarah turned her board around as did Ellie. Sarah's read, 'eyes', and Ellie's read, 'lips'.

"Guys?" Morgan gestured for Chuck and Devon to flip their boards around and sure enough, both had gotten the answer correct. "Tied game! Good work everyone, you all love each other very much," Morgan said in an exaggerated announcer's voice. Ellie threw her arms around Devon's neck and laughed. Sarah, however, was paralyzed by Morgan's words. She did love him, she did. She just had to say it.

She turned to congratulate Chuck and just before she kissed him, he murmured, "I love you." Sarah's heart sank into her stomach, even as their lips touched because the words were stuck in her throat... again. When she pulled away, meeting his expectant gaze, her heart began to pound, blood rushing through her ears, drowning out the voices of her friends.

 _Say it, just say it, he's waiting. Say it._ "Thank you." _Damn it._

Disappointment darkened Chuck's expression, but only for a moment. He quickly schooled his features and smiled contentedly, his beautiful brown eyes crinkling at the corners, and then pulled her into a tight embrace. Sarah squeezed her eyes shut as he held her, frustrated by being unable to say the words, worried that she never would and wondering how long Chuck would want her if she couldn't. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Ellie watching them, a saddened expression twisting her face. She'd obviously inferred what had just happened, Sarah had voiced her concern enough in the last few weeks whenever they'd spent time together. But when she met Ellie's gaze, the older woman just gave her an encouraging nod and a small wink, and Sarah remembered what they'd discussed just a few days ago when bouncing around ideas for Valentine's Day gifts. The words would come when she was ready and she shouldn't push herself, Chuck would be patient.

After all, he'd waited this long for her, he could wait a little bit longer. Right?

 **Valentine's Day, Echo Park, CA: 2100 Hours**

Sarah hadn't seen Chuck all day. Their schedules had kept them apart at work; Chuck being in-and-out of meetings with directors from Insomniac Games, and Sarah helping Casey with a security breach by a group of amateur hackers trying to leak Chuck's game. It was late and she was getting antsy now, waiting for him in their bedroom, wearing the fancy get-up she'd bought in the hopes of making his eyes roll back into his head. She covered the red and white bodice and fishnet stockings with a simple black robe. It would be revealed later, but first, she needed to tell him how she felt about him. Her iPod was queued up, the room was filled with the soft glow of candlelight and the smell of incense. Chuck had gone to the bathroom nearly thirty minutes ago, saying he'd be back after he cleaned himself up and grabbed her gift, leaving Sarah to battle her apprehension alone.

Her mind wandered back to the last Valentine's Day she'd spent in Burbank...alone, listening to Bryce snore like a jackhammer. Back then, she'd wondered how Chuck would treat her on that special day, but she had given up hope of finding out. Everything was different this year, and Sarah realized it was probably the anticipation, not fear, that was making her so nervous. Who'd have thought that they would come this far?

That realization was part of the reason she'd decided to share this song with him. That and the fact that it expressed her feelings for him so much better than she could ever hope to. She simply wasn't good with words and trying to use them to unravel her powerful emotions would be too much. At least at this point in their relationship. But he told her he loved her so often, and she so badly wanted to say it back. This song had helped her make up her mind to return to Burbank, so she figured it would help her break down the last of her walls and tell him that she loved him too. And the lyrics explained her inner thoughts in a more eloquent way than she could ever hope to convey. As soon as Chuck heard it, he would know exactly how she felt...at least, she hoped it would.

Finally, the door swung open and Chuck came in holding a small silver box. He was dressed in a pair of soft black sweatpants and a simple blue t-shirt and his clean curls shone slightly in the candlelight, likely still a little damp from the shower. His face was clean-shaven and she could smell the cologne he wore from where she sat on the bed. It wasn't the classiest look her boyfriend was capable of, but Sarah didn't think she'd ever seen anything sexier.

"Hey." He smiled softly, closing the door behind him and dropping onto the bed beside her. "Sorry I took so long. I didn't want to spend our first Valentine's Day together smelling like a barbarian. Here. This is for you. Happy First Ever Valentine's Day." Chuck grinned and held out the silver package to Sarah. She pulled carefully at the wrapping, revealing two small silver charms. One was a little heart and the second was a silver surfboard.

"I thought you could add things to your charm bracelet that stood for big moments," Chuck explained. "The heart for today, obviously, and the surfboard for..." Chuck trailed off and reached into the pocket of his sweat pants. He pulled out a folded pamphlet and handed it to Sarah. "This."

"Malibu Surf School," Sarah said, reading the title of the pamphlet.

"Yeah, I thought, since you were concerned about finding a job outside of the CIA, that you might like to be an instructor. You were so good at teaching me, Sarah. You could really make something out of this." He touched her arm to bring her attention away from the pamphlet and up to him. "But only if you want to. Sarah, you're still discovering what it's like to be a real person. I don't think you should worry about jumping into a career as soon as possible. Explore a little, find yourself. A job will come in time. I can help with any finances in the meantime."

"I can't believe you did this for me?" Sarah murmured.

"I know you've been struggling to find the right job. But I really do think you have time, Sarah. Maybe the gym didn't work out like you wanted it to, and I know doing security with Casey can't be the most fun. But you'll find something that you'll fall in love with, don't get discouraged just yet."

Sarah couldn't help but be reminded of the first speech she'd given Chuck when they had met on the beach and he had still been working at the Buy More. Back then, she had been the one to support and push him, and now the tables were turned. And he'd done all of this for her without her having to tell him how she was feeling.

God, she loved this man so much. This man who cared so much about her that he spent his own time helping her find somewhere to focus her mind and career. This man who always put her needs before his own and loved her unconditionally even when she couldn't say it back. And as all of these thoughts passed through Sarah's mind, she realized that the fear was slipping away. She was ready.

"Thank you." She kissed him softly, set the charms and pamphlet on the nightstand next to her charm bracelet and then grabbed her iPod. "I have something for you too. But I couldn't exactly wrap it."

"Okay," Chuck's eyes flitted from the iPod to Sarah's face and back again. "Are you...going to sing for me? Or….or dance for me?" Sarah could see that last thought was taking root in his mind and his imagination was starting to wander. She could see it in the way his eyes glazed over. She could play on this, but now was not the time.

"No," Sarah chuckled. "You're the singer, not me. As for dancing….maybe we can save that for another day. But I would like to share a song with you." She flushed a little at how cheesy this all sounded, but one quick glance at Chuck's enthralled expression set her mind at ease. He nodded eagerly, and made himself comfortable on the bed, lying back against the pillows and giving her a thumbs up to show he was ready. Sarah took a deep breath and pressed play. Chuck closed his eyes as the music wafted through the small stereo connected to Sarah's iPod and filled the quiet atmosphere of their room.

 _I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart_

 _But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start._

Sarah watched Chuck's face. A smile grew on his lips when the music started as he heard the opening lyrics, and he peeked out at her from the corner of his eye.

 _You put your arms around me and I believe_

 _That it's easier for you to let me go._

Sarah's heart twisted at the words. Ever since returning to Burbank and even before, in New York, she'd worried that Chuck would turn her away because she couldn't give him what he wanted, but he'd done just the opposite. The words still rung true for Sarah though, if he decided to leave her, she wasn't sure how she could stop herself from crumbling, but Chuck was so different now, so capable. Chuck's eyes opened fully when he heard the words and his brows knit together. He sat up in bed a little, unwinding his arms from behind his head and crossing them over his chest instead as he listened.

 _You put your arms around me and I'm home._

She'd known those lyrics to be true the first time she'd heard the song before going to New York, and they felt even more poignant now. Chuck had quickly become her home, and it was because of him that she'd done so well outside the CIA. She'd come to realize that without him, she would have been completely lost. Chuck listened to the rest of the song in complete silence, and when it ended, he turned to face Sarah, his expression conflicted.

"Sarah..."

"Wait, I have something to add," she said, holding up a hand to quiet him. He nodded and sat back again, listening intently. "Chuck, it shouldn't have taken me this long to say what I'm about to say, but I've never felt this way before, and to be honest with you, I haven't really known how to deal with what I feel for you. It's a lot and it's new and it's...indescribable. But I want you to know that you're my home, Chuck. You have been since the moment I first met you. I still remember driving you home and spending hours getting to know you and your family. I'd never done anything like that before I met you, Chuck. You were a home when I didn't think I needed one. And you still are, now that I know I do." Sarah steeled herself, waiting for the palpitations of her heart, the nervous sweat, the rapid breathing, but none of it came. Her heartbeat quickened, but not out of fear, rather anticipation. "I love you, Chuck."

Chuck's eyes rounded and his lips parted, his arms dropped to his sides and he moved onto his knees to kneel in front of her. "Sarah...God, it feels so good to hear you say that. I never wanted to push you, I know it's been a crazy couple of months, but part of me was so worried that you were considering leaving or that you didn't think you belonged here. I kept worrying that I would wake up and you'd be gone again, which I know is stupid, but I couldn't help it. And...and...just...I love you too." A smile broke out on Chuck's face and he gripped her shoulders, pulling her into a passionate kiss that she returned as best she could with her own smile restricting what her lips could do at the moment.

When they broke apart, Chuck gestured to the iPod. "That song is beautiful. I'd heard it before, but never like this. I never really listened to what it was saying. Thank you. I can't tell you how much it means that you shared your feelings with me like that."

"I thought you might like it."

"Oh, I did."Chuck pause for a moment as if considering whether to ask the question that was on his mind. "Can I ask you how you thought of it?"

"It's a bit of a story," Sarah shrugged, setting her iPod on the nightstand with her gifts and pushing Chuck down onto the mattress so that she could cuddle against his side. Running her fingers along his ribs lightly, she touched her lips to his ear and whispered, "Are you sure you don't want to save it for later?"

He chuckled, a visible shiver passing through his body, but shook his head resolutely. "We have all night, baby. And I'd love to hear how you heard that song and why you decided to share it with me."

 _Fair enough_. She should have known that Chuck would be more interested in a deep conversation than sex right now. And he was right. The night was only just beginning. So she settled against the pillows, tucking one hand underneath her cheek and gazing at Chuck's face as she spoke.

"I heard it before New York. A month or so after I left Burbank. It came on the radio." The irony was that Sarah had never listened to the radio before she met Chuck. But he and his family had turned it on so often during the beach trip in Malibu, and sitting in the car with them while they'd all sung along was something Sarah would never forget. After returning to Langley, she tried to recreate the feeling by playing it on her own. It hadn't been the same. "I didn't really listen to it at first. I caught a few words here and there and the melody was nice. But that was it. A few weeks later, I went to a coffee shop with my partner, Carina, and heard it again."

"Wait, wait, who's Carina?" Chuck interrupted.

"A friend of mine. We go back a long way. Before I ever met you."

"Will I get to meet this elusive Carina?"

"Maybe. Can I finish my story first?" Chuck made a motion of zipping his lips and tossing the key and Sarah rolled her eyes, failing to suppress her smile.

"Anyway, I really listened to the song that time." Sarah had to chuckle at the memory. Carina had been so mad that Sarah had spaced out, focusing on the lyrics of the song instead of listening to Carina fawn over Cole Barker. Then she'd called Sarah a sap and they'd left the shop soon after, but not before Sarah had decided to spend some time listening to the song on her own. "When I had a chance to listen to the whole thing alone in my apartment, I realized how deeply it spoke to me...And about what I'd gone through in Burbank with you. It was a big reason I decided to go and find you in New York."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I realized that, no matter how you reacted to seeing me again, you deserved an apology. You deserved to know how I felt and why I did what I did."

"So, if we play the Newlywed game again and someone asks me what your favorite song is..."

"This one. Easily." Sarah smirked.

"Good. I think it's mine too." Chuck drew his thumb across her cheek, letting his fingers linger near her jaw. "I love you."

"I love you too." The words came so easily that Sarah didn't know why she'd been so hesitant to say them in the first place. Her heart soared when Chuck beamed and rolled her underneath him, his hands finding the belt on her robe.

"What say we save conversation for later and celebrate that little revelation?" Chuck teased, brushing his lips against the spot underneath her jaw that he knew made her shiver.

"Are you telling me you want to stop talking?" Sarah teased back, even as her eyes fluttered shut when Chuck kissed her neck. "Who are you and what have you done with Chuck Bartowski?"

"Ha ha," he murmured, his voice muffled against her skin. "We can keep talking if you want to." He braced himself on his elbows and looked down at her with an earnest expression. She could see the passion in his eyes, though, and knew they probably mirrored her own. Talking could wait. They both wanted this.

"Later," was all she said before she reached up and tangled her fingers in Chuck's hair, pulling him down into a heated kiss. Before Sarah was entirely swept away by the feeling of Chuck's body against her own, her last conscious thought was how good it would feel to finally be able to whisper how much she loved him as they made love on her first-very successful-Valentine's Day.

 **o-o-o-o**

Chuck woke up the next morning curled around his very beautiful, very naked, girlfriend. He cracked a single eye open to the check the time on their alarm clock and then closed it again, wrapping himself more tightly around her and burying his face in the waves of blonde hair on his pillow. Their first Valentine's Day had been perfect, and it only deepened the love Chuck already felt for the woman lying beside him. That's when he remembered what she'd told him the night before, that she loved him. That she always had, in a way. And his heart soared as he recalled how often she'd said it as they made love. It had been a whisper, a passionate cry, a giggle. It had been everything.

Overwhelmed by the powerful emotions that still lingered from last night, Chuck shifted slightly, brushing Sarah's hair aside and placing soft kisses along her neck. He heard her murmur and then she wiggled in his arms, pressing herself back against his body. Chuck's eyelids fluttered and a groan rumbled deep in his chest. He began placing kisses along her neck and shoulder with more fervor, his hands wandering along her sides, down her thighs, and around her abdomen.

"Chuck?" Sarah said suddenly, her voice still a little gravelly from sleep.

"Mmmm?" he replied, his lips still moving against her skin, his mind quickly losing the ability to focus on more than the sensation of her body pressed against his.

"Can I ask you something? About what you said last night?"

She wanted to talk? Now? Scratch that. Sarah Walker wanted to talk about feelings? Chuck was so shocked, that he stopped what he was doing and propped himself up on his elbow to look down into her face.

"Yeah, of course. What is it?"

Sarah rolled onto her back to look at him and then bit her lip nervously before she spoke. "Last night, after I played the song for you. You told me that you'd always been worried...That I would leave. That you'd wake up and I'd be gone."

Chuck was surprised to learn that she was still thinking about what he'd confessed. And for how long? All night? But it was a fear he hadn't been able to shake, especially when she'd refused to return his constant 'I love you's'. A large part of him had been worried that she was keeping quiet to protect his feelings if she decided to leave him again.

"It's stupid, I know," he began. "But I couldn't help it. It just kept creeping into the back of my mind."

Sarah shook her head fiercely. "It's not stupid Chuck! I don't want you to ever think that anything you want to tell me is stupid." She reached up and cupped his face, drawing her thumb across his cheek. "How long have you felt that way?"

Chuck dropped back down onto the bed beside her and sighed. "Since you came back with me from New York, I think. After the hotel and then the train station, I was worried. And then you seemed so nervous and uncomfortable here. I wanted you to feel like this was a safe place, a home, but I wasn't sure I was doing enough."

"Oh, Chuck," Sarah smiled and kissed him gently before speaking again. "Remember what I told you last night? Burbank isn't my home. You are."

"I know that now," he said with a grin.

"I don't want you to feel like you can't tell me how you're feeling..."

"Well the same goes for you," Chuck replied. "If we had both shared what we'd been thinking about earlier than last night, I think we could have worked through our fears together." He paused and then added, "And in the case of the last few months, I don't think you should worry about your spy senses, Sarah. Your life in the CIA shaped who you are and your life here in Burbank will do the same thing. Don't try and hide that side of you just because you don't have to actively use it anymore. I want you to feel safe sharing those memories with me too, because they're a part of you, Sarah. And I love all of you. No matter what. Bartowski lovin' is not exclusive," he teased, wiggling his eyebrows at her and diving in to kiss her cheek when she giggled.

"You're right," Sarah agreed after a moment, toying with the hem of the blankets. "But I've grown up keeping my emotions and feelings to myself. It's going to take a while to break a habit like that."

"Then let's make a pact," Chuck suggested, stilling Sarah's hands and holding them against his chest. "No more lies, no more secrets. We tell each other everything. Every emotion we're afraid the other might judge. We're open books. Deal?"

"Deal," Sarah agreed, giving him a smile so large, it lit up her entire face. Then she paused, her smile becoming more subdued and shy. "I love you."

"God, I love you too," he replied, as she slid a thigh over his hip and pulled herself onto his chest. Chuck cupped her face and pulled her down for a kiss, satisfied in the knowledge that, as they made love this morning, absolutely nothing-no buried emotions or fears-would be held back.

 **April 2nd, 2010: Westside Medical, Burbank, CA: 0000 hours**

Sarah hated the smell of hospitals. The chemical cleanliness and scent of scrubs always put her on edge. It didn't do anything to calm her nerves that she and Chuck were there to meet the newest Woodcomb/Bartowski for the first time. Ellie had been in labor a long time, they'd gotten to the hospital at eight p.m. and it was now close to midnight. Chuck informed her that sometimes women could be in labor up to fourteen hours-which terrified Sarah more than it reassured her-and that four hours was really nothing in comparison. Finally, a nurse in light green scrubs came into the waiting room to greet them and take them into Ellie's recovery room.

Sarah let Chuck step inside the room first, feeling herself begin to tremble as she crossed the threshold. She wasn't sure why she was so terrified, it wasn't her own baby she was about to see, but the idea of holding-and possibly hurting-something to small and breakable set her on edge.

Ellie looked stunning for someone who had just gone through four hours of labor, and Sarah made sure she told her that. She stood by her friend's bedside and stroked her damp hair back out of her face.

"How are you feeling?"

"Great. All things considered," Ellie replied. "Do you want to see her?"

"It's a girl?" Chuck asked, his voice sounding a little shaky. "I get a little niece?"

Ellie nodded and smiled at her brother, while Devon clapped him on the back. The nurse returned with a small pink bundle and handed her to Devon, while Chuck and Sarah sanitized their hands. Devon handed Clara to Chuck first, and Sarah noted that her boyfriend seemed to have a natural instinct when it came to handling children. He cradled her head in one large hand and cocooned her little body with the other.

"She's beautiful guys. What's her name?"

"Clara Marie Woodcomb," Ellie said, meeting Chuck's gaze when he lifted his eyes from Clara's face.

"Marie...Almost like mom's name."

"Yeah." It was the only word Ellie could manage before her voice became choked and tears filled her eyes. Devon crossed the room to soothe her while Chuck held his arms out towards Sarah.

"Want to hold her?"

Panic coursed through Sarah's body and she took a step back as if Chuck were offering her a nuclear bomb, not a baby."No. I don't think I should."

"It's okay, Sarah," Ellie said from her bed, her voice still a little weak. "You can hold her. I trust you."

 _I don't really trust myself_ , Sarah thought but nodded anyway. She didn't want Ellie to think she was disgusted by her newborn child. Chuck smiled encouragingly and gestured for Sarah to hold out her arms, helping her cradle the baby before stepping away. Sarah stood there frozen, her arms locked around the child in a vice-like grip. Chuck had to remind her to breathe, a small chuckle bubbling from his lips. Sarah tried to glare at Chuck for laughing at her, but couldn't manage more than a glimpse for fear of losing focus on keeping Clara safe.

"See, you've got her, baby," he encouraged. Stepping behind Sarah, he readjusted her arms so that she was holding Clara a little more intimately. While he did, Sarah looked down into the baby's small red face. She looked so peaceful, and Chuck was right, she was beautiful, with a tiny button nose, pink lips, and wisps of her father's sandy blonde hair. The baby was warm, Sarah could feel her heat through the pink blanket. She was soft too; the hand that cradled her head ran across the delicate skin, careful not too press to hard and hurt her.

"Wow," Sarah murmured, looking up at Ellie and Devon, a grin breaking out across her face. "She's amazing."

Chuck, still pressed against Sarah's back, placed his hands on her hips and kissed her temple. "You're doing great," he whispered.

Overwhelmed by Chuck's confidence in her, the feeling of holding a newborn baby, and the smiles from her friends, Sarah turned her head to face Chuck and said, "I love you."

It wasn't until she heard a soft gasp from Ellie that she realized she had yet to confess that to Chuck in public. Valentine's Day-and night-had been full of 'I Love You's', but Sarah still kept her feelings mostly to herself in public, even when they were around people she trusted. It wasn't intentional, but her feelings for Chuck were hers, and expressing them in front of others still made her a little uncomfortable. She didn't realize until now how long Ellie must have been waiting to hear those words; to know that she and Chuck were entirely committed to one another.

"Oh Sarah," Ellie squeaked, more tears filling her eyes and Sarah had to chuckle at her friend's rampant emotions. Chuck laughed softly as well and cradled Sarah against his chest, looking down into Clara's face and picturing the day he'd see his own baby there.

 **August 13th, 2010: Carmichael Electronics Office, Burbank CA, 1200 Hours:**

Morgan stood up from his desk and stretched, glancing at his watch to check the time. His lunch hour had started five minutes ago, but he'd been too absorbed in the programming assignment Chuck had given him to notice. Grabbing his lunch bag, Morgan strode out of his small office and made his way down the hall towards the main entrance, planning to enjoy his lunch outside. It was a beautiful day after all, and he'd been stuck inside programming for four hours.

As he passed Chuck's office, the door swung open and an arm popped out, gripping him by the front of his shirt and yanking him inside.

"AHH!" Morgan cried out as he stumbled into the office, dropping his lunch sack and its contents all over the floor. He looked up to see Chuck slamming the door shut behind him, his face haggard and slightly panicked. "Chuck, what the hell, man? You scared the crap out of me! What's with the theatrics?"

"Morgan, I need your help," Chuck began, taking slow steps towards Morgan, his hands raised slightly as if he were trying to tame a wild animal. "I also need you to keep what I'm about to tell you a secret."

"Uh..."

"Can you promise me, Morgan?"

"Um...well..."

"Morgan." Chuck's face was serious, his brown eyes too wide and little glassy. "Promise."

"Okay, I promise! What the hell is going on?"

Scurrying around his desk, Chuck pushed aside some papers and spun a magazine around for Morgan to look at.

"Rings," Morgan said looking up at Chuck and then back down at the magazine. "You want me to keep a ring catalog a secret?...Oh my god! Chuck!"

"I know," Chuck said with a tired smile. "I'm going to propose to Sarah."

"Dude!" Morgan's voice nearly cracked. "I'm so happy for you guys! How are you gonna do it? Where? When?"

"Hold on, slow down, buddy. I need the ring first and that's where you come in."

"How can I help?"

"All of these rings look great, how do I pick the right one? There are different cuts too. Did you know that diamonds have different cuts? How many diamonds do I get, Morgan? Is there a meaning to how many diamonds are on a ring?" Chuck was spiraling, his fingers gripping the pages of the magazine so tightly that Morgan was afraid it was about to tear.

"Maybe...Devon would be the guy to ask. You know? He's been through all of this stuff before. He might be able to give you the best advice."

"Great idea!" Chuck said, grabbing the magazine and his coat and bolting for the door. "I'll go right now. You don't mind taking the wheel for me today do you? Thanks, buddy. I owe you!" And then Chuck was gone, the door slamming shut behind him. Morgan sighed and shook his head, bending over to pick up his discarded lunch and plopping down at Chuck's desk to eat.

 **o-o-o-o**

"Well the answer to your question is easy bro," Devon said when a frantic Chuck rushed into his apartment and interrupted his baby yoga session with Clara. "All you have to do is imagine what the ring will look like on her finger. If you can see it, then it's the right one."

"That really works?" Chuck asked, pacing the living room.

"Of course it does, but you've gotta calm your mind first. Why don't you join our yoga sesh? It'll be good for you." Chuck looked at little four-month-old Clara in a baby upward dog position and shook his head.

"No thanks, I think I'll go home and brainstorm. Sarah's down in Malibu today, so I should have some time." Devon watched him go, raising Clara's little hand in a wave.

"Say bye-bye, Uncle Chuck!" Clara, of course, just gurgled in response, but Chuck was already halfway out the door anyway. He clutched the catalog between his fingers as he walked across the courtyard. Morgan had been right, not only did he have the ring to worry about, but the time, the place, the mood. God, this was all so huge and he needed to make sure it was right. He wasn't going to get engaged again. This was Sarah, she was the one. It had to be perfect. Luckily, he had plenty of time alone to think.

Around mid-July, Sarah had finally followed through on applying for a job as a surfing instructor, and she hadn't looked back. Chuck rarely saw her around the office anymore, but that was alright, she was doing what she loved and the anticipation of seeing one another after the day was done was so much sweeter. Plus, she always smelled and tasted like the fresh salty sea air when she came home, and Chuck found he loved the smell and the way her skin and hair seemed to glow after an entire day in the sun.

Stepping into the empty apartment, Chuck wandered to the living room couch and sat down, setting the magazine out in front of him and flipping through the pages. He tried following Devon's advice, but nothing was sticking quite yet. Deciding to take a break and relax, like Devon had suggested, Chuck stood and headed for the towel closet. A nice long shower would be just what he needed to clear his head. When he opened the closet door, his eyes fell on the one towel that didn't match the rest of them. The pink one. The one that Sarah had given him almost two years ago, the one that had made him feel like he still had a piece of her after she'd left. And suddenly, as he held the towel in his hands, the proposal fell into place in his head. The time, the place, the mood. He knew exactly what he wanted to do. He had thought of the perfect spot and the perfect moment. Now all he had to do, was find the perfect ring.

* * *

 _Thank you all for reading. The next coming chapter will wrap this story up in a nice little bow. I will see all in the next installment!_


	11. Chapter 11

**_A/N:_** _Here we are folks, the end of all things. Dramatic. I need to thank my beta **michaelfmx** who has been a constant inspiration throughout this entire thing. Were it not for him, this 11 chapter 130k word story would be a tiny 3-chapter mini fic. Thanks for not letting me follow through with the plan, buddy. I owe you. Thank you also to everyone who favorited, followed, reviewed, PM'd, the support was overwhelming and so inspiring. I seriously can't say thank you enough._

 _I hope you all enjoy this last chapter, it's been quite the ride. :)_

* * *

 **August 24th, 2010, Carmichael Electronics, CA: 1100 Hours:**

Sarah peered out at the entrance to the Carmichael Electronics office building from the safety of her car. She was waiting for Morgan to wander through the doors. It was 11 o' clock, time for his lunch break, and he always came outside to eat on the lawn. Anna taught at the local ju-jitsu academy, but on Tuesdays and Thursdays, she had the day off, meaning she would be joining Morgan for lunch and he would be distracted long enough for Sarah to get into his office and find what she needed before he even finished his daily PB&. She needed to get answers for Chuck's erratic behavior.

He'd been acting jumpy lately. Always hunched over the desk in their room, scrambling for excuses whenever she caught him unexpectedly. He'd sit up straight as a board in the desk chair and smile a little too widely, find some way to excuse himself, and then disappear for hours. Sarah was growing more and more curious as time passed. She wanted Chuck to be able to talk with her about anything, not feel like he had to hide something from her. After all, it hadn't been long since the morning after Valentine's Day when they'd agreed never to keep secrets from one another. It wasn't even the fact that Chuck might be hiding something from her that bothered Sarah. What did bother her was that he felt he _needed_ to. What could be so personal that he felt he couldn't share it with her? They'd been doing so well with their communication so far. Sarah didn't want to lose that now.

A few days ago she'd caught him hunched over the desk, scribbling away at something when she entered. Immediately, he shoved whatever he was writing underneath a pile of Carmichael Electronics papers and turned to face her with a giant grin.

"Hey!" he'd said, his voice quivering just the slightest bit. "I didn't know you were home."

"Yoga got out early," Sarah replied sweetly, crossing the room to peck him on the cheek, her eyes darting to the papers clamped underneath Chuck's palm. "I'm just gonna grab my book and I'll leave you to your paperwork, okay?"

Chuck nodded vigorously, returning his attention to his pile of papers while Sarah made her way to her nightstand. She picked up the book slowly, watching Chuck tap nervously on the papers, jiggling the pencil he'd been scribbling with before she came in. Sarah returned to his side, an idea popping into her head. She knew how to get Chuck to reveal his secret and all it would take was a little teasing. Resting her hands on his shoulders, she slowly began to knead away the tension gathered there.

"You okay? You seem a little tense."

"Yup! I mean no, nope. Not tense. Just fine. Everything's fine." Chuck's voice was strained, his lips thin, eyes wide. He was the opposite of fine and he had an idea of where this was heading.

"Chuck." Sarah lowered her voice and ducked down to place a soft kiss on the back of his neck. "If there's anything bothering you, I don't want you to be afraid to tell me."

A shiver passed through Chuck's body as Sarah kissed him again, her hands sliding down his shoulders to his chest, her mouth now grazing his ear.

"I-Uh..." Sarah lifted her lips to the sensitive spot just beneath his jaw and ear and nipped at his earlobe.

"Are you sure there's nothing wrong, baby?" she said again, her voice hardly above a whisper as her lips ghosted across his neck. Chuck jumped up so suddenly that he nearly knocked Sarah backwards.

"Nope! Nothing's wrong. But I do have a lot of paperwork, so I'd better uh...I should probably...Get to somewhere else...Like the office!" Catching Sarah's slightly wounded expression, he leaned forward and kissed her before gathering up his papers. "Thank you for the...ah..massage. But everything is fine, I promise. Be back later!" Then he was gone. Out the door so fast, he practically left a trail of smoke behind him. Sarah folded her arms over her chest and frowned. If she couldn't get Chuck's secrets out of him through seduction, then there was little else she could think to do.

So Morgan was the next best target. Just then, the small bearded man made his way out the front doors, drawing Sarah from her reverie. He headed towards the lawn and Sarah stepped out of her car, shutting the door quietly to avoid drawing Morgan's attention.

Morgan was looking down at his phone while he walked-probably texting Anna-completely oblivious to Sarah as she breezed by him and stepped through the front doors, heading for his office. Casey glanced up from the magazine he was reading behind the security desk and grunted a 'hello'. Sarah smiled pleasantly and continued down the hall, not stopping until she reached Morgan's unlocked office. She began searching drawers immediately, not sure what she was looking for, but knowing she could find some sort of clue from Chuck's best friend.

As she searched through every drawer, she found nothing but comics, old paperwork, some candy wrappers and a strange collection of…..where those action figures? Frustrated, Sarah paced to the bookcase near the door and began shuffling through the various books and comics there. One of the magazines caught Sarah's attention as it had nothing to do with the rest of Morgan's nerdy collection. It was a wedding ring catalog. Sarah's brow furrowed in confusion as she studied the cover.

 _Was Morgan planning on proposing to Anna?_ The two had been together for quite some time, but neither one seemed to be in much of a rush. Sarah opened the catalog and scanned the pages. Finally, she came across a dog-eared page with a sticky note beside one of the rings.

It read: _'Eternity band? Sappy enough? Tell Chuck.'_

 _P.S. Also suggest Green Lantern style matching wedding bands._

"Oh my god..."Sarah whispered, as the pieces fell into place in her head. Chuck's evasiveness, his hours of pouring over documents-or catalogs-that he kept hidden from her. His quiet conversations with Morgan...It all made sense. And she hadn't seen any of it coming. Sarah knew she was a smart person, she'd been a capable agent when it came to gathering intelligence in the field. To miss something like this...something so huge, from the one person she knew and loved more than anyone...A voice coming down the hall snapped her out of her thoughts. It took a moment for Sarah to realize that the voice was Morgan's, and by then it was too late to hide or run. She was going to have to interrogate-or intimidate-her way out of this.

The door opened and Sarah stepped behind it, pressing herself against the bookcase to avoid being seen. Morgan stepped inside and set his empty lunch bag down on his desk. When he turned to close the door, Sarah stood in front of him and slammed it shut, turning the lock before he even had a chance to react.

"Sarah!" Morgan slapped a hand over his chest. "You nearly gave me a heart attack. What are you doing here? Are you looking for Chuck? He told me to tell you that he's-"

"I'm not here for Chuck. I'm here for you," Sarah interrupted, pinning him with an icy glare. She tossed the catalog down on the desk and pointed. "What is this?"

"That?" Morgan's blue eyes went wide. "Well that, _that_ , is a ring catalog. Generally one uses it to...find a ...um...well...to find a wedding ring. Did you find it in here? That's so weird. I don't usually keep anything other than comic books on the shelf. I wonder how that got there..."

Sarah crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes until Moran gulped in fear and adjusted his tie. "Is it hot in here or is it just me?"

"Why do you have a ring catalog, Morgan?"

Morgan bit his lip, so Sarah tried for a different tactic. Lowering her voice, she prowled towards him, taking a step forward every time he took one back until he hit the desk and had nowhere else to go.

"You do remember that I was a spy right, Morgan?" Morgan nodded his head rapidly. "Good. Just because I don't work for the CIA anymore doesn't mean I'm not still a trained interrogator. I suggest that you tell me why you have that catalog before I'm forced to prove that I haven't lost my touch."

Morgan's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. He raised his hands and cringed, shouting, "Okay, okay! It's Chuck's! He wanted help picking out the perfect ring for you, he wants to propose!...Oh...I'm a dead man..." Morgan dropped his face into his hands and slumped back against the desk.

Sarah's knees suddenly felt weak and she had trouble finding her voice. "He wants to propose?"

"Yes...He asked me to keep it a secret but...Look, he doesn't know when or where yet, but he's going to do it. He wanted it to be special and perfect. He knew you'd find out if he planned it at home so he's been coming into the office to work out the details."

Chuck wanted to marry her. He'd been doing his best to keep it a secret, not wanting her spy mode to kick in and find out before he'd planned it. Too late for that. But if Chuck had worked so hard to keep the secret then Sarah could too. She wouldn't let on that she knew. Sarah wasn't sure how she got from Morgan's office to her car, or if she even said anything to him before she left; her body was on autopilot while her mind ran a mile a minute.

She sat in the driver's seat of her car staring at the office building with the key sitting uselessly in the ignition. Chuck wanted to marry her. The words didn't feel real, the catalog she'd found felt like a dream, Morgan's face when he'd told her the truth...Everything suddenly seemed too huge. How was she supposed to handle being someone's wife. And not just anybody's wife, Chuck's wife. Was she ready for that sort of commitment? How different would it be from what they had now?

As she drove home, her thoughts turned from disbelief, to panic, and finally...overwhelming joy. The man she loved wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. With _her!_ And as scary as it seemed a moment ago, now she couldn't stop a smile from lighting up her face. He loved her and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. The Sarah Walker who had met Chuck nearly two years ago would have turned tail and run at the mere mention of marriage. But the Sarah Walker she was now was rapidly warming to the idea of marrying the man who had changed everything for her. It was a huge step, it was daunting, but they'd face it together, just like every other milestone that had come their way so far. By the time Sarah returned to the apartment, she felt like she was floating. Chuck was already inside cooking dinner when she surprised him by throwing her arms around him and squeezing him tightly. Chuck was confused by the sudden, but not unwelcome, embrace and he swiveled in her arms to return the gesture, kissing the crown of her head and asking what he'd done to deserve such a heartfelt 'hello'. Sarah just shook her head and held him tighter. This was the man she was going to marry, who wanted to marry her. The words felt real now and they didn't terrify her in the slightest.

 **September 1st 2010, Malibu, CA: 1100 Hours**

Chuck made it half way to shore before a bump in the waves knocked him off of his board and into the ocean with a splash. He reemerged just in time to see Sarah following him in, much more gracefully than he could ever hope to manage at this point. She leapt off of her board once she was beside him and dove into the waves, popping up close enough to touch her nose to Chuck's.

"You're getting better," she teased, her blue eyes sparkling.

"God, I hope so," Chuck groaned, pushing his wet curls out of his face and slinging one arm over his board. "I've been doing this for months, I feel like I'm not getting anywhere."

"Chuck," Sarah reached out with the hand that wasn't gripping her own surfboard and stroked his cheek. "You're great." He smiled at her and then lifted himself all the way onto the board, beginning to paddle out past the waves again with Sarah at his side.

"Don't you remember the first time you did this?" Sarah asked as they paddled. "You could hardly stand for more than a second."

"Yeah, now I can stand for five."

"Chuck."

"I'm joking!" Chuck sent her a lopsided grin to prove his point. He knew he'd improved. He was a decent surfer now, having Sarah as his personal instructor had certainly helped. But it was also hard to look good doing it when she was cutting through the waves like a dolphin. _Dolphin Sarah..._ Chuck shook his head. _Weird image._

The sat on their boards, side-by-side, waiting for the next big wave to come and take them in, when Sarah turned to him again and nudged the underside of his board with her foot. "You really do look good out there, you know."

"Oh yeah?" Chuck turned and wiggled his eyebrows at her, flexing his arms so exaggeratedly that she had to laugh. But it was true. Surfing with Sarah almost every other weekend in Malibu kept him pretty fit, and the sun probably did wonders for his complexion. He noticed the way Sarah bit her lip slightly when she nodded at him and he felt his cheeks flush. "I...well...Thank you. You look great out there too...You always do." Chuck vividly remembered the first day he'd ever laid eyes on her cutting across the waves, looking for all the world like she was one with them.

Sarah was leaning towards him, the side of her board dipping beneath the water as she shifted her weight. Chuck met her halfway, his hands coming up to hold her waist as their lips touched. Realizing too late that they probably had a beach full of people watching them, Chuck lifted one hand from her waist to cradle the back of her head instead and drew his tongue gentle across her bottom lip. Sarah gripped the hem of his board shorts and tugged gently, bringing him so close that his board knocked against hers. Suddenly the swell of a passing wave lifted their boards and pulled them apart.

"I think the ocean's telling us to get a room," Chuck grinned.

"Well, unbeknownst to the ocean, we have a room," Sarah replied, a dreamy smile on her face. "One I intend to take full advantage of later." She gave him a wink, hopped onto her board and rode another swell towards the shore, leaving Chuck in the lurch behind her, realizing he'd probably have to wait a for a wave...or two... before he could stand up and ride it in.

 **o-o-o-o**

About an hour later, Chuck sat on the beach watching Sarah surf across the choppy waves while the sun beat down on his outstretched legs and the wind tousled his curls. She had decided to go back into the ocean for a while longer, leaving Chuck to admire her grace as she surfed and reminiscing about the first time he had seen her, probably from very nearly this same spot. Devon lay nearby, spread-eagled on his own beach towel for 'maximum tanning potential', as he had phrased it. Ellie had gone back to the car to grab Clara's sippy cup, and that left Chuck to watch over the five-month-old while her parents were occupied. Taking care of Clara was easy, or so Chuck had thought. All he had to do was make sure she didn't fall face first into the sand and keep her sunhat on to protect her delicate skin. Unfortunately, Clara seemed determined to tear her hat off every few seconds and continually tossed her toy water rings around on the sand, reaching out with stubby hands to grab them and almost toppling over herself every time.

Chuck kept one hand around Clara's little body to steady her, while keeping his eyes on the waves, or more specifically, on Sarah. The proposal was happening here, on this beach, tonight, and so far everyone had done an excellent job of keeping quiet about it, although Ellie was practically bursting at the seams, tears springing to her eyes every time she saw the two of them together. Surprisingly, Chuck found he wasn't nervous about popping the question. He was confident in how the proposal would play out, and that the meaning associated with the place he'd chosen to do it wouldn't be lost on Sarah. In fact, the longer he watched her tackle the waves, the more he wanted night to fall so that he could get on with the proposal. He was ready to spend the rest of his life with her, and he wanted that next chapter of their lives to start now.

"Look Clara. Look at Aunt Sarah. See? Here she comes." Chuck guided Clara's attention to the ocean, where Sarah was riding a wave in towards the shore. Clara watched Sarah walk up the beach with wide eyes, gurgling happily when she was close enough for Clara to recognize her face.

"Ah!" Clara squawked, stretching her arms out for Sarah, who set her surfboard aside immediately and swung Clara up into her arms.

"She was watching you surf," Chuck said, unable to keep the grin off of his face as he watched Clara snuggle into Sarah's shoulder. "We may have another surfer on our hands one of these days."

Sarah sat down next to Chuck, adjusting Clara in her lap and kissing the baby's head. "Want me to teach you to surf, Clara?"

"Ellie might have a heart attack."

"Well, we'll wait a while...Like until she's one," Sarah teased, sticking her tongue out at Chuck when he laughed. Clara squawked again and reached for Sarah's surfboard, patting it with her little hand and then settling back into Sarah's lap with her thumb in her mouth.

"No, no, Clara," Sarah said softly, drawing Clara's hand out of her mouth and handing her a water ring, that hadn't been tossed into the sand, to chew on instead. "Your mommy's not going to like it if you make a habit out of that."

Chuck smiled as he watched the interaction. His future was sitting right in front of him. Maybe in a few years, Sarah wouldn't be holding Clara, but another baby girl. Curly brown hair instead of wispy blonde, and bright blue eyes just like Sarah's.

"Chuck?"

"Hm?" Chuck snapped out of his thoughts, realizing that Sarah was looking at him as if she were waiting for an answer to a question he'd missed.

"Everything okay? You're staring."

"Yeah, yup! Sorry. Everything's fine! Just thinking about Clara surfing...I bet she'd be good at it, honestly. I mean look at her dad. Awesome can literally do anything athletic. Clara is just a mini captain Awesome in the making. She's Corporal Awesome."

Sarah narrowed her eyes. She knew Chuck's rambling pattern well enough by now to know he was hiding something, but she didn't pursue the matter. Ellie returned from the car then, sippy cup in hand, and sat down next to Chuck, holding the cup out to Clara.

"Clara, look at you cuddling with Aunt Sarah," Ellie cooed. "Do you want your cup?"

Clara looked at the cup and then stuck her thumb in her mouth again, wiggling in Sarah's lap to make herself more comfortable. Ellie laughed and reached out to take Clara's hand out of her mouth.

"Well, I guess we know who Clara's favorite is," Chuck teased, watching Clara squirm when Ellie took away her thumb. "Sorry, El."

"I'm not her favorite," Sarah scoffed, looking worriedly at Ellie. "Don't joke around like that, Chuck."

"It's alright Sarah," Ellie laughed. "Clara loves you. And it's so nice to see you to like this as opposed to the first time you held her."

"You mean right after she was born, when Sarah held her like a radioactive bomb?" Chuck joked, pulling another laugh from Ellie.

"I didn't want to hurt her." Clara looked up and stuck her thumb in her mouth again, reaching up with the other hand to touch Sarah's ponytail. "See, what did I tell you, Clara?" Sarah teased when the baby had her thumb taken away by Ellie yet again. Clara scowled at her mother and turned her face into Sarah's shoulder, molding herself into the crook of Sarah's arm. Ellie gave Sarah a huge smile full of hidden, and not so hidden meanings, and then handed Sarah a pacifier to give her instead. Once Clara was content with it, she began dozing while the adults talked. But Chuck didn't join Ellie and Sarah's conversation, he kept glancing at Clara, asleep in Sarah's arms, and picturing his own baby there. Reaching into the pocket of his board shorts, Chuck began fiddling with the ring box. The bonfire they had planned would start when the sun set, which meant Chuck had a few hours to refine his proposal speech. As Sarah and Ellie continued to chat, Chuck went over the words in his head again and again. By the time night fell it was going to be perfect.

 **o-o-o-o**

The sunlight was starting to fade and before the bonfire could get underway, Chuck excused himself, hurrying back to the house to grab a t-shirt from his bag. Inside the house, he found Casey reading a book in the living room. Chuck had been surprised when Casey first decided to join them on their now annual Malibu trip, but the man had kept mostly to himself for the whole trip, staying inside while the others enjoyed the beach, claiming he hated sand whenever anyone asked him to join the fun outside. He looked up from his book when Chuck entered and stood up from the couch.

"Trying to make a break for it, Bartowski? You haven't chickened out have you?" Casey knew about Chuck's proposal plan. In fact, he'd been the one to assure Chuck that a simple proposal was the way to go. But he'd also maintained a slightly aggressive habit of teasing Chuck about it whenever he had the chance. Chuck hoped it was good-natured, intended to push him along and keep him from getting cold feet-but cold feet had never been a worry for Chuck. He wanted to do this more than anything.

"Nope," he responded. "Just grabbing a shirt so I don't freeze out there once the sun goes down. You should really consider joining us for the bonfire, Casey. We have towels...You won't have to sit on the sand."

Casey grunted and shrugged his shoulders.

"Come oooon, Casey."

Cocking a single brow, Casey rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine. I'll come."

"Great! Meet you down there! I just need to make sure I have everything I need for tonight," Chuck said, dashing down the hallway towards the room he shared with Sarah.

"Chuck," Casey called after him, stopping him in his tracks. "Don't over think it. Remember, all you need is the girl."

Chuck gave the older man a resolute nod and a smile. "I know."

Casey returned the nod, grabbed his book and headed out the back door. Chuck watched him go, his chest filling with warmth as he realized how grateful he was to have a mentor like Casey in his corner. Shaking his head to clear it, Chuck hurried to his room, rummaged through his bag for a t-shirt and light sweatshirt. He switched the ring box from the pocket of his board shorts to the sweatshirt, hoping it would be easier to reach for if his hands started trembling when the big moment came. Once he had everything he needed, Chuck took a moment to study the ring, picturing how it would glint in the moonlight on Sarah's finger. Tucking the box in his pocket, Chuck hurried out of the house and back towards the beach. He was ready.

 **o-o-o-o**

The bonfire roared and crackled, sending showers of sparks into the night sky while the group of friends sat around it, enjoying one another's company. Morgan and Anna had insisted on roasting marshmallows again, and now Chuck sat close to Sarah, watching as she helped Clara chew on a barely toasted marshmallow. Ellie hadn't been ecstatic about the idea of feeding a ball of sugar to Clara, but once she'd been assured they'd only give her one, she'd conceded. Besides that, Clara wasn't eating it so much as she was gumming on it and then dropping it into her lap over and over again.

Sarah laughed and looked over her shoulder at Chuck when Clara stopped chewing on it completely and let it hang from her lips instead, staring at the fire with wide, curious eyes. Chuck smiled, scooting closer to her on the pink towel they shared and wrapping his arm around her waist. The towel hadn't been lost on Sarah. Her eyes lit up when he'd spread it out next to the fire with a flourish and a grin. She'd quickly understood its significance without him having to explain it.

The beach was shrouded in shadows now, the only light coming from the soft glow of the moon and the roaring bonfire. Chuck's heart began to pick up speed as he realized it was dark enough to recreate the scene he'd been thinking of. Their first kiss on this very beach. Sticking his hand in his jacket pocket, he fiddled nervously with the ring while Sarah handed Clara back to Ellie, the baby's marshmallow now abandoned on the ground. Turning back to Chuck, Sarah gave him a wide smile and leaned forward to kiss his cheek, nuzzling against his side and sighing with contentment.

"Hey," Chuck gently nudged her shoulder. "Walk with me?"

Sarah looked curious and a little startled by the suggestion, but agreed anyway. They stood together and Ellie shot Chuck an expectant glance that he caught from the corner of his eye. He acknowledged her unspoken question with a tiny wink and Ellie nearly squealed in response. Taking Sarah by the hand, Chuck led her away from the bonfire and onto the darkened beach. They walked close to the shoreline, letting the water lap at their bare feet.

Chuck was quiet for awhile, listening to the crash of the waves and reminiscing about the first time he'd walked this stretch of beach with Sarah. Back then he'd thought he was fighting a losing battle to be with her, and it had crushed him when she'd walked away after their kiss. He understood now why she had done what she did, and how conflicted she had been about it, but the memory still stung a little. Shaking the thoughts away, Chuck focused on what he needed to do tonight. No longer would the beach be the home of melancholy memories, soon it would be filled with the ones of the happiest night of his life...One of them anyway, he was sure there would be many more here. Suddenly, he felt Sarah's hand slip into his own, and he was drawn back to the first time they'd walked this beach together at night, hand-in-hand. Back then, she'd quite literally been reaching out to him, and although it had backfired at the time, the gesture felt similar to Chuck now. She was physically drawing him out of his thoughts and back to the present with her.

"Do you remember the first time we came here together?" Chuck asked, his voice hardly carrying over the sound of the waves.

"The first time? Or the second first time?" Sarah teased, easing Chuck's nerves without even realizing it.

He chuckled. "The second first time...Actually..." Now that he thought about it, he already had some very happy memories on this beach with Sarah. The first time they'd met here, when he'd been buried neck deep in the sand, was the catalyst for everything that had happened since. There was no way he'd ever forget that meeting. "The first, first time."

"Yes, of course I remember. Hard to forget meeting a guy buried in the sand by his friends and then being 'left to die'."

"Not my best moment."

"But memorable." Chuck looked down to see Sarah smiling softly at him. She leaned up on her tiptoes and pecked him on the cheek before she continued. "But I think I prefer the second first time we were here together."

"Surfing, frisbee-ing, marshmallowing-"

"Making out," Sarah finished for him, giggling when he gasped in shock. Although their first real kiss was something Chuck would always remember, he didn't see it in quite the same light as Sarah did.

"I wouldn't really consider that kiss making out, you turned me down, remember?" He tried to keep his tone light but Sarah's expression fell anyway.

"Yeah."

"Hey," Chuck stopped walking and moved to stand in front of her, holding her shoulders, forcing her to look at him and then running his hands gently down her arms. "Whatever happened between us back then, it's not important. We're here now. It all led to this. Besides, how that particular kiss ended doesn't matter. It's still one I'll never forget. And we've had so many kisses since then. Way better ones if you ask me." Chuck wiggled his eyebrows and gave her his nose-wrinkling grin.

Sarah couldn't help but giggle, and when she did, Chuck resumed walking, taking her hand again and carrying on down the beach. He felt a shiver pass through her body when a gust of wind buffeted them, and he almost gave her his sweatshirt when he suddenly remembered the ring was still stowed in its pocket. So he wrapped his arm around her instead, pulling her into the warmth of his body and slowing his pace to keep the position from making walking together too difficult.

"Besides," he said. "I think this beach is going to hold a lot more good memories for us than bad."

"Oh?"

Chuck stopped again and turned Sarah around, wanting to see her face when he did this. She looked at him expectantly, her beautiful blue eyes shining in the moonlight and he suddenly wanted to kiss her, but that had to wait or he'd never be able to finish what he wanted to say.

"Two years ago," Chuck began. "When I first met you here, when you saved me from a possibly deadly sunburn, I had no idea how much you would change my life, Sarah. How could I know? How often do you meet a stranger who comes out of nowhere, turns your whole world upside down and tells you exactly what you need to hear to move you forward in life?" Sarah's eyes searched his face now and he noticed that she seemed to be breathing a little quicker. If she hadn't caught on to what was happening yet, she was about to.

"You changed everything, Sarah. You made me see who I could be and you gave me the drive to become that guy, and all you had to do was smile and tell me I was worth something. I think that's when I knew that you were special. I'd never met anyone like you before and I never will again."

Tears sprung to Sarah's eyes, but she didn't fight them, instead letting them gather and spill down her cheeks as Chuck spoke. She knew what was about to happen, she had since she'd cornered Morgan nearly a month ago. And it had been obvious, once they'd arrived at the beach, that Chuck was planning on proposing in the same place that they'd met. But the magnitude of the moment hadn't hit Sarah until just now. And she couldn't compose herself.

"And even later, when I thought you were with someone else... the luckiest guy in the world who got to spend every day loving you...Even then, you pushed me forward. And I couldn't help but fall in love with you, Sarah. I'm really not sure any man could. But still!" Hearing her small chuckle made his heart bounce in his chest. "We've already been through so much together, this giant roller coaster of emotions, but I think this is only the beginning for us, Sarah. There are so many things I still want to do, and I want you by my side...always. If you'll have me." She was definitely crying now, he could see the tear tracks sparkling in the moonlight. So he lifted a shaking hand and brushed away the tears with his thumb.

She raised her own hand, holding his to her cheek as her heart pounded against her ribcage. His eyes never left hers, not for a moment, and Sarah felt like she could sink into the depths of his brown eyes and never resurface. Part of her still couldn't believe what was about the happen, but the rest of her was aching for Chuck to ask her. To say the words. The words that Sarah Walker had never, until recently, thought she would ever hear. That she would ever be worthy of hearing.

"Sarah," he began, using his other hand to reach into his pocket, he pulled out the ring box and popped it open. Sarah's eyes widened when she saw the ring and then they flickered back to his face as a smile grew on her lips. "Will you marry me?"

She didn't say yes. She didn't say anything. Instead, she launched herself at him, throwing her arms around his neck and crushing her lips to his. Chuck stumbled backward, nearly dropping the ring box, and wrapped his arms tightly around her, pulling her body so closely to his he thought she might pass right through him. He could feel the tears on her cheeks wetting his own, so he drew a hand through her hair to soothe her. When she pulled away from him, after what felt like an eternity, she stared up into his eyes, an enormous smile lighting up her entire face.

"Yes."

Chuck's heart hammered against his ribs, and he felt like he could take flight like Superman as he took the ring and slid it onto her finger. Devon had been right, it was perfect. She kissed him again, tackling him into the sand and landing on top of him hard enough for Chuck to grunt. But she didn't apologize and he wouldn't have let her anyway. He cradled her as she kissed him, relishing the feeling of the cool metal of the ring sliding against his cheek. She pulled away suddenly and gazed down at him, the love and adoration she felt for him shining in her eyes.

"I love you."

"That's good, otherwise your reaction might have been a tad too dramatic. I'll give you a B+ for staying in character this long, Agent Walker." Chuck teased, earning a slap on the chest that made him groan. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry. I meant to say I love you too." Sarah pursed her lips, torn between punishing him for his out-of-place joke and giving in to his puppy-dog expression. Eventually, the latter won out and she kissed him again.

Chuck sighed contentedly, letting his eyes slip shut as his hands roamed his fiancé's body. Fiancé. God, it felt so good to say that. It felt good that she'd said yes. It felt good to have her body on top of his, with the soothing sound of the waves in his ears and the cool sand against his back. He was overwhelmed by the realization that this was only the beginning of their life together. Chuck was already on cloud nine, and the night was only going to get better, they still had to tell the others.

 **o-o-o-o**

Sarah was very aware of the weight of the ring on her finger as they made their way back to the bonfire hand-in-hand. She was still partially convinced that this was all a dream. It seemed too incredible to be true that this man, her Chuck, wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. She'd always known his love for her was unconditional, but the ring and the proposal had solidified it in her mind. Her heart began to race as they approached the others, each one of them watching the couple with expectant expressions. It was only then that Sarah realized that they must have known about the proposal much longer than she had, most of them had probably given Chuck a few ideas here and there. And it certainly explained Morgan's odd behavior when she'd interrogated him about Chuck's intentions. So Morgan had known more than he was letting on, and she had believed him….she would have to settle that with him later.

"You two alright?" Ellie asked slowly, her eyes flickering back and forth between the two of them.

"Amazing," Sarah answered, holding up her hand, the ring sparkling in the light of the fire. The silence that had fallen over the group as they approached shattered in a cacophony of voices as everyone rushed forward, offering congratulations and cheers and pats on the back, handshakes and hugs. Sarah was overwhelmed by the kindness and love of her friends; the intensity of it almost matched her new fiancé's. Out of the corner of her eye, Sarah saw Casey give Chuck a small nod and a smile. It was strange, but also heartening to know that Casey had been the one to support Chuck in taking the next step in his relationship with her. The story of Kathleen sprung to Sarah's mind and she swallowed to fight the lump forming in her throat. Maybe, when the time was right, she would talk to Casey about whether it was time for him to take a leap of faith and reach out to Kathleen. He deserved that much after all he'd done to support Sarah and Chuck's relationship.

Ellie suggested they move the celebration inside as the temperature continued to drop and Clara was getting fussy. Once the group had gathered their things, stamped out the fire and made the treck up to the house, Ellie put Clara down for the night, while Devon revealed the collection of alcohol he'd stashed in the kitchen. The celebration went long into the night, everyone drinking wine and beers and continuing to congratulate Chuck and Sarah about their engagement. Wedding plans were joked about and Morgan and Devon started arguing over who would be best man. Sarah already knew she wanted Ellie to be her maid of honor as she was, for all intents and purposes, already the closest thing to a sister that Sarah would ever have. Deciding that now was a good a time as any to ask her, Sarah pulled Ellie aside while the guys continued to argue.

"God, Sarah. Can I just say how happy I am for you? And for Chuck? For the both of you. After everything you've been through. Who would have thought you'd be getting engaged?" Tears sparkled in Ellie's eyes as she spoke.

"Not me," Sarah said with a sigh. She couldn't have ever imagined the twists and turns her life had taken since Chuck Bartowski came into it. "You know Ellie, I don't think I'd be here without you."

"What do you mean?"

"You were so quick to welcome me into your home. Even that first night, when I was just some stranger your brother brought home. You made me feel like I was part of your family from the very beginning." Ellie's bottom lip trembled and she nodded fiercely, unable to respond with words. "You know I...I never had any siblings growing up. I think it's only fitting that you, my soon to be sister-in-law, are also the closest thing I've ever had to a _real_ sister. With that being said...Ellie, would you be my maid of honor?"

Ellie squealed and sobbed at the same time, throwing her arms around Sarah and hugging her with enough force to crack a rib, but Sarah held her just as tightly. The noise drew the men's attention, who were surprised enough to stop arguing. Chuck watched Sarah and his sister closely, trying to discern what had just happened. He caught on when Ellie pulled away and wiped the joyful tears away from her eyes.

"Sarah, I'd be absolutely honored."

"See, now why can't we decide that easily?" Morgan grumped, turning to glare at Devon, who was laughing uproariously. Chuck just smiled as he watched his sister and Sarah hug again; content that his fiancé had officially made a home with his family.

 **o-o-o-o**

As the night came to an end, the group dispersed into their separate rooms, still giddy and light from the effects of the alcohol and the news of the engagement. Chuck flopped onto his back once he and Sarah were alone in their room and closed his eyes, taking a moment to think about everything that had happened tonight. He waited for his fiancé to join him, but when she didn't he opened his eyes and saw her standing at the end of the bed smiling at him.

"We're getting married," she said simply.

He chuckled. "God, I sure hope so. Everyone's going to be really disappointed in the morning otherwise."

Sarah dropped to her knees on the edge of the mattress and crawled over him, taking her time, eating him up with her eyes as she went. Chuck swallowed in anticipation.

"We. Are. Getting. Married." She broke up each word by dropping a kiss onto his t-shirt, ending at his neck and nibbling his skin gently. She looked up at him, her blue eyes sparkling in amusement and then she flopped onto her side next to him and giggled. Chuck loved seeing this side of Sarah, the one without inhibitions or worries. The one with a salacious sense of humor and a laugh that sometimes turned into a snort. Rolling onto his side, he slung one arm over her waist and gazed at the ring on her finger.

"We're getting married," he agreed, savoring the way the words felt in his mouth. "You said yes."

"Why would I say anything else?" she asked, reaching up to cup his cheek with one hand. She looked exhilarated and exhausted all at the same time, her skin seeming to glow in the lamplight, but her eyes kept drifting shut even as she gazed lovingly at him. As much as Chuck would like to celebrate their engagement intimately tonight, it could wait. Her comfort came before his and now that they were engaged, they had all the time in the world. So he leaned down and gave her a chaste kiss, reaching for the covers bunched at their feet and pulling them upwards over both of them.

"Get some sleep, baby," he murmured as she curled against him and sighed. He swore he heard her mumble and 'I love you' but when he listened again for it all he heard was her steady breathing.

"I love you too," he said anyway, closing his own eyes and wrapping an arm around Sarah's body to keep her close. He'd never felt happiness like he did now. Overjoyed that the woman he loved had agreed to spend her life with him. After all they'd been through together to get to this moment, Chuck couldn't ask for a better way to begin the rest of their lives.

 **March 1st, 2012, Echo Park, CA: 1200 hours**

Sarah woke from her unexpected nap with a start. Two things were already very wrong with this situation. One: Sarah never took naps. But lately, every time she sat down or found someplace comfortable enough to let her eyes slip shut for a minute, she fell asleep. In fact, she often found herself missing the times Chuck got home from work because she'd be fast asleep and her new husband was too thoughtful to wake her up. Instead, he ended up carrying her back to the bedroom from wherever she'd fallen asleep and tucking her in for the night. It was as sweet as it was aggravating. And the fatigue didn't stop at home. Earlier in the week, she'd asked her manager for a few days off from work at the Malibu Surf School. It had become increasingly difficult to focus on work when she was left breathless and tired after only an hour or so in the waves. She wasn't sure why she was losing so much steam so quickly. She hadn't let up on her training routine at all, in fact if anything, she pushed herself harder now that she was so concerned about her failing stamina.

Second: she was feeling sick again. Maybe it was the flu or some other stomach bug that was making her so tired and ill all the time. But the fact that her symptoms had only increased over the last three weeks was what concerned her. Figuring it was about time she called someone who might know what she was going through, Sarah pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and dialed Ellie's number.

"Sarah?"

"Hey, Ellie, is this a bad time?" Sarah asked, surprised by the exhaustion apparent in her own voice.

"Not at all, I'm at home with Clara today. What's up?"

"I just-"Sarah trailed off, suddenly feeling foolish. It was probably just a little bug, maybe allergies (although she'd never had allergies, even as a child), it was stupid to call Ellie over what was probably nothing. "I've felt a little under the weather lately...I guess I wanted a professional opinion."

"You're making me work? On my day off, really Sarah?" Ellie teased and Sarah couldn't help but smile.

"Sorry. I just need some quick advice."

"Alright, let's hear it." Sarah went through her symptoms quickly and Ellie listened in silence, popping in occasionally with a short question.

"Any fever?"

"No."

"Aches or pains?"

"Well...my back, yesterday."

"Uh huh..." Ellie's voice lilted upward as if she'd had an epiphany. "And you're tired most of the time, you said. Breathless? Feeling nauseous?"

"All of the above, doc," Sarah teased.

"I think I have something that might help you," Ellie said. "Why don't you come over and I'll help you take it."

The way Ellie phrased the offer sounded odd to Sarah, but she agreed, lifting her sore body off the couch and making her way across the courtyard to Ellie's. She was greeted with a rambunctious 2-year-old Clara, who burst through the door when Ellie opened it and hugged Sarah's legs.

"Sawah!" she shouted, nuzzling her cheeks against Sarah's jeans.

"Hey Clara," Sarah cooed, lifting the child into her arms and following Ellie into the apartment. Clara wiggled out of Sarah's arms once they reached the living room, opting to play with her toys instead.

"So what's your diagnosis?" Sarah asked, as Ellie led her to the kitchen and began shuffling through one of the drawers.

"Well, if my theory is correct," Ellie said, handing her a small box. "You'll need to take this."

Sarah read the text on the box and almost dropped it in shock. "A pregnancy test? You're joking!"

Ellie shook her head and pursed her lips to hide her smile. "No, I wouldn't joke about this, Sarah. But all of your symptoms point to it."

"You...That can't. Ellie, come on. It's probably just a cold or...something. I can't be pregnant."

Ellie's eyebrows rose and she pursed her lips. "Well, sure, some of your symptoms could point to a common cold, but there's one thing that doesn't. How's your sex life been recently?"

Heat flared in Sarah's cheeks and she nearly choked on her response, "I'm sorry...What?"

"Most pregnant women get notoriously hormonal, especially in the beginning of the pregnancy. Those hormones manifest themselves in a vastly increased sex drive. A cold won't do that for you. So," Ellie crossed her arms over her chest and pinned Sarah with a questioning stare. "How often are you and Chuck having sex?"

"Ellie!" Sarah's ears were beginning to burn now. Ellie was her best friend, but she was also Chuck's sister and discussing how often they were intimate wasn't something Sarah was eager to do.

"I'm being clinical here, Sarah. Doctor, remember?" Sarah could tell Ellie was getting a sort of perverse pleasure out of making her uncomfortable, but her question was valid. Her mind started to whirl, trying to figure out how and when it could have happened. She and Chuck had a discussion about starting a family not too long ago, but they'd both agreed to consider it more seriously in the future. At this point, they'd only been married for a little over a year. To start a family so soon was ...it was too fast, wasn't it? She'd been careful too. Or she thought she had. Switching from her IUD to birth control pills-just in case-had been a bit of a transition, but she hadn't missed a day. Or she thought she hadn't anyway. But it was possible. And as cliché as it sounded, their most recent Valentine's Day had been so passionate. If it hadn't happened the first time then maybe...one of the two times after that? These past few weeks it seemed that Sarah couldn't keep her hands off of her husband. Maybe Ellie was right...

Ellie touched Sarah's arm to regain her attention. "You okay?"

"Yes... No. I don't know."

"Sarah, breathe. Go ahead and use our bathroom, I'll come in and help you once you're done, okay?"

Sarah nodded wordlessly and headed to the bathroom, her feet on autopilot, her mind still spinning for an explanation. What if it was positive? What would she do? She couldn't be somebody's mother. She wasn't the type of person meant for parenthood. Not yet, anyway. She wasn't ready…..was she? And what would Chuck think? He'd seemed so adamant about saving the idea of a family for much later. With the growth of Carmichael Electronics and Sarah's focus being directed towards her new life and new job, there didn't seem to be enough time for another person in their lives. And she didn't want Chuck to be distracted, not when his company was officially leaving the independent market and entering the professional gaming industry. Would he be angry that they hadn't been careful enough? Nervous? Chuck would never tell her if he wasn't prepared for this baby, he'd be too concerned for her well being. But she wanted him to be happy about this. If she could just see his smile...she wouldn't be so afraid. There was nothing she could do about it now but find out if she really was pregnant.

Sarah sat on the edge of the bathtub, waiting for the test results, her arms crossed over her stomach as she rocked slightly back and forth. There was a soft knock and Ellie came in, worry darkening her usually bright features. She sat next to Sarah on the rim of the tub and stroke her arm comfortingly.

"You okay?"

Sarah took a deep breath, trying to lessen the shaking in her limbs before she spoke. "What do I do if it's positive Ellie?"

"Well...Celebrate?" Ellie tried for a smile that Sarah couldn't quite return. "Sarah, it's going to be okay."

"I'm not like you, Ellie. I'm not a parent. I'm not that kind of person."

"Sarah!" Ellie sounded shocked. "Are you kidding? I've seen you with Clara, you're a natural with her. And she's not even your daughter. You are an incredibly capable woman, Sarah. You're fiercely protective of the people you love, you're smart, and you're thoughtful. I have absolutely no doubt that you are going to be an amazing mother."

Sarah smiled and leaned her head on her sister-in-law's shoulder. Ellie's words were incredibly comforting, but still, she was afraid, especially for her husband.

"I know you're nervous, Sarah. But that's natural. Every woman is scared at the beginning, even if she's been trying for a baby. I was scared when Devon and I first found out about Clara."

"You were?" It shocked Sarah to know that a natural mother like Ellie could have been as terrified as she was right now.

"Of course, it's a big deal. But having Clara in my life now...I wouldn't change it for anything. You know, it's funny. I always told Devon I'd never love anyone more than I loved him. But when Clara was born and I held her in my arms for the first time...Well, I was wrong about that promise I made. She had my whole heart." Ellie smiled at Sarah when she lifted her head from her friend's shoulder. "You can't even imagine that kind of unconditional love, Sarah. But I promise you that you'll feel it too."

"What about Chuck? What will he think?"

"My brother?" Ellie laughed, her hazel eyes sparkling. "I'd be surprised if he doesn't pick you up and parade you around town when he finds out." Sarah had to laugh at that too. She sobered quickly when her watch suddenly beeped, signaling the test was ready. Closing her eyes and taking a steadying breath, Sarah rose and headed for the sink where the test lay.

"What's it say?" Ellie asked.

Sarah clutched the test in one hand and turned around to face her friend, a soft and unexpected smile on her face. "It says that ...I'm pregnant."

"Oh my god, Sarah!" Ellie squealed, rising from the tub and pulling her into a crushing hug. "I'm so happy for you! And I know you're scared but this is so incredible. You're going to be okay, I promise."

She pulled away and held Sarah at arm's length. "Just remember this, you're not alone. I can help you with any pregnancy questions you have and my brother is going to be the most doting husband on the planet. In fact, he'll probably get on your nerves after a while!" Ellie paused, gauging Sarah's expression. "How do you feel?"

She felt a lot of things. Fear, nervousness, anxiety but also...joy, excitement, awe. It was strange to imagine that she held a piece of both her and Chuck inside her now, a symbol of their love and commitment for one another. To simplify her feelings for Ellie's sake, she smiled and said, "I feel amazing."

All that was left now was to tell Chuck.

 **o-o-o-o**

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty!" Chuck teased, as he returned from work that evening to see Sarah sitting at the dining table, chewing on her fingernails. He crossed the room, dropping his bag on the couch and kissing Sarah's cheek. "Good to see you're awake." His fingers trailed up and down her arms, leaving goose bumps in their wake and Sarah leaned back into his touch with a sigh.

"Sit down," she said, tugging on his sleeve. "I have something to tell you."

"Sounds serious," Chuck replied with a mirthful smile. He took a seat across from Sarah, lacing his fingers on top of the dining table and gazing at her expectantly. "What's up?"

Sarah felt herself beginning to shake again. She'd spent all afternoon rehearsing what she was going to say, but actually voicing the words suddenly seemed impossible. "Do you remember that conversation we had not too long ago...About...um...about possibly starting a family?"

"Yes." Sarah studied Chuck's face, trying to gauge his expression but it remained relatively neutral, a slight bounce of his eyebrows the only sign that he hadn't expected this to be the topic of conversation.

"Well, I went over to Ellie's today to ask her for advice about my...sleeping issue."

"And?" Sarah blinked. She'd expected her husband to connect the dots a little quicker. Or maybe he had and he was waiting for her to say it out loud.

"And... I ended up taking this." Reaching into her pocket, Sarah pulled out the pregnancy test that she'd wrapped in a tissue before leaving Ellie's. She set it on the table in front of Chuck, watching his eyes slide away from her face down towards the test. He stared at it for a few moments, and then suddenly his mouth opened in a small 'oh' and his eyebrows rose so high that they almost disappeared into his hairline.

"Sarah." He choked on whatever words he was going to say next and picked up the test. Sarah couldn't see his face, but his shoulders tensed and began to shake. Then he set the test down and covered his face with his hands. For a moment Sarah thought for sure that her mild-mannered husband was about to burst with anger. But he surprised her, looking up and peeking at her between his fingers with glassy eyes.

"You're pregnant?" he asked, sliding his hands down his cheeks until they were resting on the table in front of hers.

"Yes."

"Oh my god," his voice trembled, and then he let out a watery chuckle and grabbed Sarah's hands. "Oh my god! Sarah, you're pregnant!"

"You're not mad?" she asked as he rose from his chair so quickly that it squeaked on the wooden floor and moved around the table, pulling her to her feet.

"Mad? Why would I be mad? What are you talking about?"

"Well, we didn't plan for it. I thought maybe you would be upset that it was a surprise."

Chuck frowned. "Did I ever make you feel that way? That I would be upset with you if a baby came a surprise."

"Well, no," Sarah began, realizing how foolish her fear had been. "It's just...With the company growing and everything...I thought maybe, you would be a little..."

"Upset? Sarah, no. You're pregnant. We're going to have a baby. That's amazing! I couldn't be happier. The company comes second to you, to my family, always." He pulled her into a tight embrace, one arm wrapped around her waist and the other around her shoulders. Sarah felt his lips in her hair and the steady thump of his heart against her own chest. She wrapped her own arms around him, so grateful that the surprise had moved him to tears of joy and not anger. Suddenly, he pulled away and held her at arm's length.

"What about you? How do you feel? Are you okay?" Chuck asked, concern etched onto his features. Sarah's heart melted for her husband, how could she have been afraid when she had Chuck at her side?

"I'm...I was scared at first. I'm not sure I know how to be someone's parent."

"I don't either," Chuck laughed. "We'll figure it out together and we'll make mistakes together. Nobody knows what they're doing when they first have a child. Ask Ellie, mother-of-the-year. Even she's made mistakes with Clara." Sarah smiled, feeling like a weight had just lifted from her shoulders. "Wait a minute, who knows? Just Ellie?"

"Just Ellie," Sarah assured him.

"Good." A beaming grin lit up her husband's face. "I want to be there with you when you tell everyone else." Sarah smiled back, glad to have Chuck's support and excitement. In this moment, she wasn't sure why she'd expected anything different.

"I can't believe this..." he whispered, pulling her against him again. "I love you."

"I love you too," she murmured against his shoulder. As he held her, the anxiety and apprehension she'd felt when first reading the results of the test began to slip away, leaving only the joy and excitement. She was going to have a baby with the man she loved more than anything in the world, there was no reason to be afraid. Not when Chuck would be with her every step of the way.

 **o-o-o-o**

"Boy or girl, do you think?" Chuck asked quietly from where he lay spooned behind Sarah, his large hands rubbing slow circles on her belly. Sarah paused to think about her answer, staring into the darkness of their bedroom and pursing her lips.

"I don't know. But I think I want a boy, with your curls."

"Oh?" Chuck shifted behind her. "Funny. I want a girl with your eyes."

"Mmmm," Sarah hummed. "Unfortunately, it's not up to you."

"Is it up to you?" Chuck's voice sounded dubious, so Sarah decided to push him just a little farther.

"Sure, Ellie was telling me different things you can do to influence the gender. For example, women who eat foods with high levels of potassium usually end up having boys."

"What? Are you...Is that really?...I'm hiding all of the bananas then."

"Chuck, I'm joking," Sarah laughed. "You know there's no scientific truth to any that."

"Oh," Chuck sounded sheepish. "Right, yes, I knew that. It's just the way you said it kind of made me hope that all of my high school biology classes had lied to me."

"And even if there was, I'm not going to 'try' for a certain gender," she said, stroking his arms that were still wrapped around her waist.

"No matter how much you want a 'boy with my curls'," he teased, nuzzling the spot beneath her ear and jaw.

"If I don't get him this time, we'll just try again."

Chuck gasped softly against her neck, sending shivers down her spine. "Another one? What happened to the Sarah Bartowski that I know?"

"You happened to me," Sarah said, her voice softening enough for Chuck to catch the sentiment. He slid his arms around her waist and pulled her against his chest, dropping a soft kiss on the dip of her neck and shoulder.

As Chuck murmured how much he loved her over and over again, Sarah thought back to how true that statement was. Back to the first day they'd met on the beach. How different would her life have been if she hadn't found him that day? Or if he hadn't gone to work for Roark? Would they have crossed paths again? Would they have fallen in love? What if she hadn't gone back to New York? What if Hannah hadn't left for Paris and stayed with Chuck instead? What if Sarah had died that day she was shot in Moscow? There were so many small moments that had led to this one, and if any of them had been slightly different, she might not be here, cocooned in her husband's warmth and love, their baby growing inside of her. Sarah smiled as she reminisced about all the choices she'd made to get to this moment. As difficult as some of them had been, and as much heartache as she'd had to go through, she wouldn't change a single one. Not for anything.

* * *

 _There we have it. An end to The Butterfly Effect. It's been a big journey getting through this story both personally and ...professionally? Well, as an author anyway, I feel like I've learned so much and grown._

 _That being said, it's time for me to take a break. I won't be posting another story for a good few months, gotta take a step back and regroup, but I'll be back soon enough with a bunch of new stories in store for you all._

 _Once again, thank you to everyone, I appreciate your support so, so much. And I hope to see you all in the next story. Thank you!_


End file.
